Tomorrow is going to be a wasted day.
First, I have to get up early and cover for another teacher. The classes are the levels that I hate teaching the most. I got roped into it because the teacher called while I was feeding the kids dinner at the nanny job and the ringtone was the same as the mother's ringtone so I thought it was the mother, and the second I went to go pick up the phone the kids ran away from the table because they were being brats, and then the fucking teacher leads with "Are you busy tomorrow morning?"
I HATE IT WHEN PEOPLE DO THAT. "Are you busy at X time?" Because if you say "no," then automatically you are assumed to be free to do whatever they want you to do and if you don't then you are a horrible person. I was distracted by kids running around with food in their hands and dropping crumbs and causing havoc, so I said "no" and then she said "Great, can you cover these classes which are all the levels you hate the most and are not at all comfortable teaching?" and then if I said no I would feel like a heel. And I tried to back out of it, I really tried, I said that I would have to check my schedule, I was at my nanny job right now and the kids had just run away, and she said okay what time are you done so you can check and I truthfully answered 9:00pm, and she told me she needed an answer before then so I just agreed because oh dammit Kiddo's trying to run with a cup of milk in his hands and I know I'm going to be cleaning that off the floor in two seconds if I don't do something.
So I got roped into that.
And then the dad gets home and says OH BY THE WAY SPARKLES STARTS BALLET TOMORROW and it turns out that starts an hour earlier than I usually get there, and he doesn't even know the time or where her ballet clothes are or realizes that I have to pick her up from her school, which I don't know the protocol for, and if I hadn't realized that in the car before I pulled out, and went back inside and asked him, he never would have told me, because he doesn't think and I am supposed to be a magical psychic who magically knows how they want me to run their children's lives and how to accomplish those things. And is always assumed to be available.
Before I pulled out (the second time), the mom called me and told me that tomorrow is also Parent's Night at Sparkles' school, and that I would have to put the kids to bed and that they wouldn't be home until 9:30.
So. I'm getting up early, teaching horrible lessons that I am exceedingly uncomfortable with, having an hour lunch break, going to a second shitty job doing things I don't want to do, need to put the kids to bed which WILL involve tantrums from both and probably hitting and probably them spitting on me because that's what they do, with no support or.....fuck. Just fuck. Fuck my shitty life.
I just...I just hate that. I'm going to waste a whole day on menial, mindless, useless work for a pittance of wages. I will have accomplished nothing. Not even reading something interesting. Nothing. Zip. I will be exactly one day older and one day closer to my death, and I will have nothing to show for it but a ridiculously small sum of money, most of which will disappear the next time I need to fill my car's gas tank.
Fuck. My. Shitty. Pathetic. Life.
Fuck.
Fuck.
FUCK.
Fuck everything.
I HATE IT WHEN PEOPLE DO THAT. "Are you busy at X time?" Because if you say "no," then automatically you are assumed to be free to do whatever they want you to do and if you don't then you are a horrible person. I was distracted by kids running around with food in their hands and dropping crumbs and causing havoc, so I said "no" and then she said "Great, can you cover these classes which are all the levels you hate the most and are not at all comfortable teaching?" and then if I said no I would feel like a heel. And I tried to back out of it, I really tried, I said that I would have to check my schedule, I was at my nanny job right now and the kids had just run away, and she said okay what time are you done so you can check and I truthfully answered 9:00pm, and she told me she needed an answer before then so I just agreed because oh dammit Kiddo's trying to run with a cup of milk in his hands and I know I'm going to be cleaning that off the floor in two seconds if I don't do something.
So I got roped into that.
And then the dad gets home and says OH BY THE WAY SPARKLES STARTS BALLET TOMORROW and it turns out that starts an hour earlier than I usually get there, and he doesn't even know the time or where her ballet clothes are or realizes that I have to pick her up from her school, which I don't know the protocol for, and if I hadn't realized that in the car before I pulled out, and went back inside and asked him, he never would have told me, because he doesn't think and I am supposed to be a magical psychic who magically knows how they want me to run their children's lives and how to accomplish those things. And is always assumed to be available.
Before I pulled out (the second time), the mom called me and told me that tomorrow is also Parent's Night at Sparkles' school, and that I would have to put the kids to bed and that they wouldn't be home until 9:30.
So. I'm getting up early, teaching horrible lessons that I am exceedingly uncomfortable with, having an hour lunch break, going to a second shitty job doing things I don't want to do, need to put the kids to bed which WILL involve tantrums from both and probably hitting and probably them spitting on me because that's what they do, with no support or.....fuck. Just fuck. Fuck my shitty life.
I just...I just hate that. I'm going to waste a whole day on menial, mindless, useless work for a pittance of wages. I will have accomplished nothing. Not even reading something interesting. Nothing. Zip. I will be exactly one day older and one day closer to my death, and I will have nothing to show for it but a ridiculously small sum of money, most of which will disappear the next time I need to fill my car's gas tank.
Fuck. My. Shitty. Pathetic. Life.
Fuck.
Fuck.
FUCK.
Fuck everything.