I am at a loss.
I don't know what to think. I know how I feel, I know it makes me crazier. Yet I can't do a thing about it. What is the point of saying all the things that need to be said if the person I'm trying to talk to won't take the chance to listen? The worst thing is, is that she is justified in not taking that chance. Fuck I don't know that I would if our roles were reversed. Still, just because I, in all likelihood deserve it, doesn't make it easy for me to accept.
I can't change the way I played my hand in the past, I can't change the cards that have been dealt, and I can't change the rules of the game (which is not to say they don't change). All I can do is change the way I play.
This isn't a trick, this isn't fake, and this isn't about sex or lust or anything like that. Frankly I don't understand it and it scares the hell out of me. Yet, here I am saying this and knowing that until you are willing to trust me, nothing I say or do could ever make you believe this.
Also I want you to know that despite what you believe , and despite what you have been told you are beautiful. Profoundly so. Without even trying you make me feel things I didn't even know were possible.
I can't change the way I played my hand in the past, I can't change the cards that have been dealt, and I can't change the rules of the game (which is not to say they don't change). All I can do is change the way I play.
This isn't a trick, this isn't fake, and this isn't about sex or lust or anything like that. Frankly I don't understand it and it scares the hell out of me. Yet, here I am saying this and knowing that until you are willing to trust me, nothing I say or do could ever make you believe this.
Also I want you to know that despite what you believe , and despite what you have been told you are beautiful. Profoundly so. Without even trying you make me feel things I didn't even know were possible.