(no subject)
so... my family reads my other blog, and my aunt tends to worry when there's nothing to worry about. i think i'll be updating my livejournal a tad more often... at least for a bit.
i'm really confused. i feel angry and upset and hurt and insecure while at the same time feeling lucky and blessed and happy... i have an amazing support system here between my friends and some advisors, and i guess i just have mixed feelings right now about the fact that i can't get anything past them. on the one hand, i'm lucky they care enough to notice when something's not right and confront me about it, but on the other hand... part of me wishes they hadn't. part of me wishes i'd done a better job lying and hiding things. ...it's the weirdest, most illogical thing to be thinking about this situation, but i really can't help it. i wish they hadn't said anything just yet. it's a good thing they did, but... i guess i'm still struggling with it a bit. other things going on at the same time don't really help. when did my life get to be so full of drama again? (oh that's right... it all started with another stupid decision. i seem to be making a lot of those lately.)
in other news, i've done a lot of class-skipping this week. one class monday, one wednesday, and two today. yupppp...
but i am starting to feel more like myself again, overall.
i'm not even making sense, am i?
i'm really confused. i feel angry and upset and hurt and insecure while at the same time feeling lucky and blessed and happy... i have an amazing support system here between my friends and some advisors, and i guess i just have mixed feelings right now about the fact that i can't get anything past them. on the one hand, i'm lucky they care enough to notice when something's not right and confront me about it, but on the other hand... part of me wishes they hadn't. part of me wishes i'd done a better job lying and hiding things. ...it's the weirdest, most illogical thing to be thinking about this situation, but i really can't help it. i wish they hadn't said anything just yet. it's a good thing they did, but... i guess i'm still struggling with it a bit. other things going on at the same time don't really help. when did my life get to be so full of drama again? (oh that's right... it all started with another stupid decision. i seem to be making a lot of those lately.)
in other news, i've done a lot of class-skipping this week. one class monday, one wednesday, and two today. yupppp...
but i am starting to feel more like myself again, overall.
i'm not even making sense, am i?