meditation as the non-entertainment non-industry
I learned a valuable life lesson by crashing into a mental hospital and attending group therapy while there.
The lesson I learned from listening to other people in this place --> was that mental illness is often the result of refusing to accept reality.
It's one thing to want the world to be a better place. It's a different thing to refuse to accept the world as it is.
Acceptance doesn't mean giving up on the world. Acceptance means realizing that the world isn't going to magically become a different place merely by wishing it so, merely by fretting about it, merely by denying it. Wishing really really hard isn't going to change anything. Refusing to admit truths isn't going to change anything. Feeling upset isn't going to change anything. You only change the world by acting upon it, and even then the effects of your actions will be limited and uncertain. There are things you cannot change, if only because your own energy and attention spans are limited.
[Some traditions call this realization the "Serenity Prayer".]
Sometimes people want the world to be a different place so badly, that they punish themselves via persistent negative emotions. The only person who hurts when you feel negative emotions about the world is you.
There's a difference between accepting reality and feeling bad about reality. Feeling bad about reality can become a kind of lazy crutch, you can fool yourself into thinking that feeling bad is useful. You can say, "I won't feel good until the world is XYZ." I knew people who would say, "I won't feel good until Trump is no longer President," for example. [Some of these same people now say, "I won't feel good until we've defeated capitalism."] I remember attending a panel discussion that focused on people dealing with trauma from Trump's election, at one of the GaymerX conventions. Yeah, that election outcome was tough, I cried after that 2016 election (and then I deleted my Facebook account). Accepting reality doesn't mean you never feel bad about anything. Accepting reality means you realize crying about it won't change anything. You only change things by acting upon them. And even then the effects of your actions will be limited and uncertain. There are things you cannot change.
But accepting reality doesn't mean giving up on the world. It doesn't mean not caring. It doesn't mean hiding in a cave or building a bubble -- hiding is not acceptance, it is a form of denial.
I think I wrote before something like this: accepting reality means realizing you are neither a Goddess nor powerless. You don't get to recreate the entire universe, but you do get to act within each moment in ways that support your ethics and your beliefs. But so does everybody else. And they won't all share your ethics and beliefs. We'll never have unanimity of belief and purpose among billions of humans.
The universe is based on an informal sort of democracy, in that every living thing gets to act upon its own behalf, and no one person is truly in control. So this means you cannot be in control either, regardless of your position, title, or responsibilities. You're just one of billions [or trillions if you count nonhumans] of actors, all acting at the same time. You get to choose how you act, within the limits of your energy and attention span. That's your power. It's limited, you aren't a superhero, but it's not nothing. So decide how you're going to act. And then accept the outcome.
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"It’s easy to speak as if policy smoothly reshapes reality."
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Somehow I decided the one goal I was committed to during this first three-week separation was resuming my meditation game. The next goal I need to commit to after T returns is continuing my meditation game. And then during the next separation I will contact the local Soto Zen meditation center.
Over the weekend I think it was difficult to accept that this one goal is enough. But personal change is slow and often involves relapsing.
As I escape from Peak Responsibility the first thing I want to add to my life is a daily meditation habit. I truly think it will enable me and lead me toward whatever the second thing might be. But if I don't have time to meditate, I don't have time to add any new responsibilities or goals to my life. My lack of meditation is a symptom of my prior Peak Responsibility attitudes, and my unwillingness to let go of my responsibilities. Instead I've been waiting for them to let go of me. K moving away, Dax passing, T spending time away, retirement, someday the cats passing, and so on.
If I can't find time to meditate each day, I'm too busy holding on, I'm not accepting things as they are.
-----
Put cats away first thing, took out trash/recycling, prepared for Maids Day, now I need to brush my teeth and drive to the condo, where I hope to stretch, then do a dance video, then start my work week.
The lesson I learned from listening to other people in this place --> was that mental illness is often the result of refusing to accept reality.
It's one thing to want the world to be a better place. It's a different thing to refuse to accept the world as it is.
Acceptance doesn't mean giving up on the world. Acceptance means realizing that the world isn't going to magically become a different place merely by wishing it so, merely by fretting about it, merely by denying it. Wishing really really hard isn't going to change anything. Refusing to admit truths isn't going to change anything. Feeling upset isn't going to change anything. You only change the world by acting upon it, and even then the effects of your actions will be limited and uncertain. There are things you cannot change, if only because your own energy and attention spans are limited.
[Some traditions call this realization the "Serenity Prayer".]
Sometimes people want the world to be a different place so badly, that they punish themselves via persistent negative emotions. The only person who hurts when you feel negative emotions about the world is you.
There's a difference between accepting reality and feeling bad about reality. Feeling bad about reality can become a kind of lazy crutch, you can fool yourself into thinking that feeling bad is useful. You can say, "I won't feel good until the world is XYZ." I knew people who would say, "I won't feel good until Trump is no longer President," for example. [Some of these same people now say, "I won't feel good until we've defeated capitalism."] I remember attending a panel discussion that focused on people dealing with trauma from Trump's election, at one of the GaymerX conventions. Yeah, that election outcome was tough, I cried after that 2016 election (and then I deleted my Facebook account). Accepting reality doesn't mean you never feel bad about anything. Accepting reality means you realize crying about it won't change anything. You only change things by acting upon them. And even then the effects of your actions will be limited and uncertain. There are things you cannot change.
But accepting reality doesn't mean giving up on the world. It doesn't mean not caring. It doesn't mean hiding in a cave or building a bubble -- hiding is not acceptance, it is a form of denial.
I think I wrote before something like this: accepting reality means realizing you are neither a Goddess nor powerless. You don't get to recreate the entire universe, but you do get to act within each moment in ways that support your ethics and your beliefs. But so does everybody else. And they won't all share your ethics and beliefs. We'll never have unanimity of belief and purpose among billions of humans.
The universe is based on an informal sort of democracy, in that every living thing gets to act upon its own behalf, and no one person is truly in control. So this means you cannot be in control either, regardless of your position, title, or responsibilities. You're just one of billions [or trillions if you count nonhumans] of actors, all acting at the same time. You get to choose how you act, within the limits of your energy and attention span. That's your power. It's limited, you aren't a superhero, but it's not nothing. So decide how you're going to act. And then accept the outcome.
-----
"It’s easy to speak as if policy smoothly reshapes reality."
-----
Somehow I decided the one goal I was committed to during this first three-week separation was resuming my meditation game. The next goal I need to commit to after T returns is continuing my meditation game. And then during the next separation I will contact the local Soto Zen meditation center.
Over the weekend I think it was difficult to accept that this one goal is enough. But personal change is slow and often involves relapsing.
As I escape from Peak Responsibility the first thing I want to add to my life is a daily meditation habit. I truly think it will enable me and lead me toward whatever the second thing might be. But if I don't have time to meditate, I don't have time to add any new responsibilities or goals to my life. My lack of meditation is a symptom of my prior Peak Responsibility attitudes, and my unwillingness to let go of my responsibilities. Instead I've been waiting for them to let go of me. K moving away, Dax passing, T spending time away, retirement, someday the cats passing, and so on.
If I can't find time to meditate each day, I'm too busy holding on, I'm not accepting things as they are.
-----
Put cats away first thing, took out trash/recycling, prepared for Maids Day, now I need to brush my teeth and drive to the condo, where I hope to stretch, then do a dance video, then start my work week.