damaged at best (ichigo, hollow ichigo) (dark)
Damaged at Best
Disclaimer: I do not own Bleach.
Warnings: Blood and gore, dark themes, bad language
Summary: They both know his strength and weakness is to protect.
Rating: R
Notes: I believe this is one of Ichigo’s few fears.
-x-
His cries are the most painful to hear, Ichigo finds in dark realization. Never before had he heard such a heart-wrenching cry and the shinigami's heart stops each time it rips through the air. He doesn't ever remember Uryuu allowing others to see his wounds; no sound had ever emitted from the Quincy. He could be beaten to the ground but he'd fall silently-he wouldn't show pain.
Until now.
And now Ichigo can only curl into a ball, trembling and covering his ears in a vain attempt to silence the horrifying calls for help. Oh, fuck. He's shouting for him. Uryuu, the most prideful teenager ever to walk the earth, is begging for Ichigo to sweep in and save him. But he can't this time, Ichigo knows with sickening understanding.
He promised himself he wouldn't but Ichigo looks up anyway. Binds suspend the Quincy off the ground as a blade swiftly slices through his shoulder. Ichigo can't breathe as blood falls on the ground, following a stream steadying its way to him. Ishida's voice fills his head as another scream escapes.
"Stop!" Ichigo screams, shaking and feels like vomiting, "Just stop! Take me, please!"
But the frighteningly white figure only laughs and continues.
-x-
"You take him for granted."
Ichigo throws himself off the bed and out of his bedroom, releasing the contents of his stomach into the toilet.
"Shut up," he whispers breathlessly, still shaking from the nightmare. He wipes his mouth and supports himself on the counter in exhaustion.
"You take all of them for granted."
Covering his eyes, Ichigo shudders as images of blood flow back into his mind. It's not true, he knows-they both know. But the monster wants to provoke him, to have a greater power. It's just another thing the heartless being can do better than Ichigo. The freak's not in control but it sure feels like it.
"Shut the hell up."
"Who is up next? Your precious father? Sisters? Or, maybe...I should just skip to the best part and take Rukia-chan."
"No," he gasps out but it's too late.
Bending over, Ichigo throws up again as the hollow pushes a violent picture involving said shinigami within his mind. Falling upon the cold tile floors of the bathroom, Ichigo fights off the sobs as another round of torture begins. Slumping against the bathtub, the damaged teen pulls at his hair, enduring the suffering for hours to come.
-x-
End.
-x-
At first I didn’t think that this was too dark. But this only means I’m getting over my personal problems right now (I’m weird; I write happy stories when I’m not feeling good and sad stories when I’m am…maybe I need a therapist).
Perhaps many others have shown this within their representation of the hollow/Ichigo conflict, but I wanted to portray the demon within him as just that: a true devil. Wouldn't his hollow know how afraid Ichigo is to be helpless? Which then brought about this fic. And I chose Ishida because that relationship is just over looked in the fandom (I do it too).