Call me a hopeless romantic - and just when I was about to finally sleep
I will "borrow" Joey B's words to me, but this time directed at Lipie: Not that you're a loo-loo or loo-ree or anything, BUT, you won the lottery when you got engaged to Linley - no, the friggin' multi-state POWERBALL. Again, not that you were exactly a lonely loo-loo. . .
I loved her at hello (and sorry; not a fan of that sappy film), and I KNEW she was the perfect woman for you. And I didn't even notice her looks. She became beautiful to me when I saw how kind and considerate and genuine she is. Then I thought,God, he'd better not FUCK this up!!! The ONLY thing that concerned me was her age - though she WAS legal (you would NOT be needing my legal services, in other words), and the fact that you used to, um enjoy chasing skirts - or letting an occasional ho or skirt chase you (in at least one case). Am I saying you were a HO? No, not exactly. Well, YES, I AM. Of course I am. Pleez. In fact, I do recall having called you a . . .what was that term. . .oh yeah, a MHO. But pre-Linley, of course.
Anyway, since I MUST go to sleep - and thanks a lot for telling me to take a glance a FB when I got home pooped from a late night out - I will cut to the chase. The news that you will both soon be man and wife (and get used to saying those words, guys) makes me ecstatic and erases all the horrors related to Arnold, MD and the suspension. Kudos. I could NOT be happier if I had actually won the Powerball. Truly. Money means nothing; true love, everything.
And if I am not invited to the wedding as the flower oldsquaw, I will disown you! Or just cry my eyes out. Unless you elope - then, ok. No, Shelley and I will plan the engagement party/RauHaus, okay. Good. Done. Yes, I am considerate thoughtful bossy.
Oh! And the coolest thing? And NOT a coincidence, I now realize. Today, I finally felt well enough to go on a mall date with Spouse. He had to do some convincin'. I had too much to do. Didn't feel up to it. Too tired, you go by yourself, I have to clean and do chores, yada, yada, blah, blah, whatever.
He said, Oh please, Pookums. And I said, okay, but just a short mall date. THEN - eight hours of our best mall date ever later, I found a gorgeous, purple silk Calvin Klein dress - in a size 8. (and CK cuts small). It's my dream dress I squealed! I MUST have it, I don't care how much it is!!! And it was dirt cheap, actually. Spouse, who always lets me get whatever I want, said, "but what wedding do we have coming up?" And I said, who CARES?!" I love that dress so much, I'll FIND a wedding. And he bought me my dream wedding-guest dress. Again, random? No, I don't think so. . . YAY!!!! Now, I must reduce stat! Size friggin' 8! Um, you wanted a LONG engagement, right?
I loved her at hello (and sorry; not a fan of that sappy film), and I KNEW she was the perfect woman for you. And I didn't even notice her looks. She became beautiful to me when I saw how kind and considerate and genuine she is. Then I thought,God, he'd better not FUCK this up!!! The ONLY thing that concerned me was her age - though she WAS legal (you would NOT be needing my legal services, in other words), and the fact that you used to, um enjoy chasing skirts - or letting an occasional ho or skirt chase you (in at least one case). Am I saying you were a HO? No, not exactly. Well, YES, I AM. Of course I am. Pleez. In fact, I do recall having called you a . . .what was that term. . .oh yeah, a MHO. But pre-Linley, of course.
Anyway, since I MUST go to sleep - and thanks a lot for telling me to take a glance a FB when I got home pooped from a late night out - I will cut to the chase. The news that you will both soon be man and wife (and get used to saying those words, guys) makes me ecstatic and erases all the horrors related to Arnold, MD and the suspension. Kudos. I could NOT be happier if I had actually won the Powerball. Truly. Money means nothing; true love, everything.
And if I am not invited to the wedding as the flower oldsquaw, I will disown you! Or just cry my eyes out. Unless you elope - then, ok. No, Shelley and I will plan the engagement party/RauHaus, okay. Good. Done. Yes, I am considerate thoughtful bossy.
Oh! And the coolest thing? And NOT a coincidence, I now realize. Today, I finally felt well enough to go on a mall date with Spouse. He had to do some convincin'. I had too much to do. Didn't feel up to it. Too tired, you go by yourself, I have to clean and do chores, yada, yada, blah, blah, whatever.
He said, Oh please, Pookums. And I said, okay, but just a short mall date. THEN - eight hours of our best mall date ever later, I found a gorgeous, purple silk Calvin Klein dress - in a size 8. (and CK cuts small). It's my dream dress I squealed! I MUST have it, I don't care how much it is!!! And it was dirt cheap, actually. Spouse, who always lets me get whatever I want, said, "but what wedding do we have coming up?" And I said, who CARES?!" I love that dress so much, I'll FIND a wedding. And he bought me my dream wedding-guest dress. Again, random? No, I don't think so. . . YAY!!!! Now, I must reduce stat! Size friggin' 8! Um, you wanted a LONG engagement, right?