May 01, 2006 14:07
i had this dream once where i understood everything and everyone understood me and i didn't have to try so hard to get my point across. it was only a dream, because if i mean one i say two and then the person hears two, thinks two, and judges me based off of two. sometimes i do things without conscious knowledge and say things without thinking anything through. i become paranoid and create these theories of conspiracies between people i love and turn them against me.
my first session is tomorrow at 3. his name is kerri minnis. i wonder if my insurance will pay. i hope this will help me understand like others understand.
its these things which made me lose the only person that ever really knew me to a "t". and i will do anything for her, including this.
so do you dream like i dream? in confusing, hurtful nightmares. occupied not by monsters under the bed but by people you love. all telling you that "you're not enough", and that "you never will be". its not a dream so wake up.
-k.kai