Alright here goes....

[kalomari]

I would say read my uber-cool auto-biography but it's probably not going to be finished for several years so here is what has been going on with me since August 9th 2004. (Takes deep breath...) OKay well I found out on the 11th of august that I couldn't talk to Clairissa anymore because on the 8th of August Ashleigh called Clairissa and they both agreed to three-way call me so they did and it was an interesting chat. The problem is I guess for some reason Clairissas father decited to ease drop on us I have no idea why he must have heard something. So yeah I didn't know anything had happened until the day I called to talk with her father and invite him to Summerfest for my church man I love church by the way it has made me a better person and I hope people realize that. So anyways I invited him and I remember it as clear as day he told me he had to decline when I asked him why he replied with "You don't know it but there were more voices on the phone the other day then you thought." I was like excuse me and then he told me that he stumbled onto our phone conversation yeah stumbled you mean you were being nosey and disrespectfull to my privacy, Ashleighs privacy and even the privacy of your own daughter. You know what though that's what first came to mind but it turns out I was wrong I thought about it and the only crime here was the conversation in general Clairissas father was really only being exactly what he is, a father. Now to understand this let me give you the jist of the conversation that Clairissa, Ashleigh and myself had on that day. We were all talking and being ourselves just having a good time you know and Clairissa joked about giving her dad the phone and I was like no don't please and she said I will I said look please don't I fear your father. Then Clairissa said hey Richard why don't you come over to my place I was like okay I'll be there in ten minutes and she was like how are you going to get past my father I said Oh I can take him big mistake. Well not really I think her dad was impressesd by my fear towards him and humored that I said I could take him because I said it jokingly anyways that wasn't all that he heard there was more I don't know every exact detail thathe listened in on but I know some that he told me. Ashleigh mentioned alot of my past that I'm sure her father didn't care much for and it kind of made me mad that she was telling Clairissa anyways darn you Ashleigh but yeah it was stuff I'm trying to forget and move on from. Then Clairissa mentioned the her and I up against a wall joke I think that really concerned her father the most but that's also what he didn't understand that the majority of the conversation was one big joke. That was about it I can't remember most of the conversation and I actually regret letting them three-way call me in the first place simply because it was disrespectfull to her father so touché Mr. Hamlin touché. So what happened was her father didn't give me an explaination just said I couldn't see her at that time well I started working more and tried to worry about me and atr the same time I moved out of my parents house. Everything was going great there was just one thing missing one major piece to my puzzle that was not here and it was Clairissa as you all know you have never seen me happier since the day I layed eyes on her you know because I simply never stop talking about it. So a month passed and I said I can't wait any longer I need to know whats going on so I tried to contact Mr. Hamlin for a couple weeks I got no reply so I finaly did something smart I didn't call him I faxed him. Yeah I did it I faxed him and surely enough on sunday september 12th I receieved a call from her father while I was at church and at my parents house because knowone really knew I moved yet except a few close friends. Anyways I got home and my whole family told me I literally slid across the floor to the phone to hear the message and after I heard it I called him but not before I called Ashleigh. I thought I was a man but you know what I think it was on this day that I truly became a man you see I called Ashleigh first because my legs were shaking I couldn't really speak when I called her she yelled at. She said Richard it's time you stop asking peoples advice and listen to yourself then she hung up on me after she hung up suddenly my leg it stopped shaking and I could speak again but with a deeper voice than before and I took my wallet out and dialed her number. I won't type the entire conversation because it was an hour or maybe even longer but I think the two of us in this conversation gained more respect for each other. We both came to the conclusion that I couldn't see Clairissa for a year I knew it was reasonable enough because all it really meant weas that there would be a time and a place that I would see her again so I agreed. And you know what I'm willing to bet most people would give up and go after another girl because they say there are more fish in the sea well I got news for everyone this fish is golden and alot more special than any other fish I have ever run into. Others might waste their time and follow through with the year just to prove something well I have nothing to prove and Clairissa is certinally not a waste of my time and never will be I love her and nothing will change that not even a year ofcourse I'm not going to guarentee my sanity in a year (joking.) So this was the crossroad I had a decision to make I could give up now, fold, throw my cards on the table and play another game or I could lose the bad cards and have the dealer hit me with some new ones so that I would atleast have some sort of chance, guess what dealer hit me. Since then I was doing okay but something came over me since the 12th of september I realized I can't see her for a year and I didn't even get to see her one more time sort of like I didn't get to say goodbye and it upset me. Well I pray everyday and everynight and sometimes while I'm at work I just walk around and talk to God because whether or not he answers I know that he listens and he always will. Well on October 11th my dad was driving us to work thank God it was my dad driving and we were passing the bus stop and the 601 pulled by I said to myself in my head she's going to step off that bus and surely enough she stepped off the bus. I didn't think I just reacted you ask my dad I went crazy rolled the window down and I shouted out to her KITTEN, KITTEN she didn't hear me or did she so I shouted CLAIRISSA and I begged my dad to stop. We got to the light and I almost jumped out the window remember people I wasn't thinking just reacting so I rand across the street and ran all the way to the light where she was she knew it was me because she covered her face and was blushing like crazy. I shouted don't look and we won't get in trouble I went to her I said I'm sorry I just couldn't help myself I needed to see you again before the year so we talked for a little while I told her I missed her and she said she missed me more we argued on who missed who the most it was funny. Then I asked her does your father not like me and she said if he didn't like you would he have given you a chance I guess not she walked away and said bye sweety see you september 12th. Just then I walked up to the car where my dad was still behind the wheel with a puzzeled and angry face but somehow he understood I was going to get into the car and I had to hold my legs they were shaking more than ever. We were driving away and she was at the corner I said I'll miss you for a year she replied I'll miss you more suddenly I felt a little better but it wasn't over yet. I arrived at work and suddenly something came over me I realized crap I broke the agreement what do I do well I wanted to call and ask someone what I should do but then I realized I'm a man my own man and I know what I have to do. So I went to a payphone and picked it up and I called Clairissas father yes I know it was a bold move well he answered and asked me to call back in fifteen minutes because he was busy. So sure enough I called back in fifteen minutes and I said as follows Mr. Hamlin sir I ran into Clairissa today and I know I'm not obligated to call and tell you but I just wanted to be completly honest and truthfull with you, he said well I'm glad you called and told me it's ironic really because we were just talking about if you two were to run into each other. He said I'm not keeping you from running into each other if you happen to see each other and say hi it's fine just don't carry on a conversation I said okay yes no problem sir then he said okay and we hung up. And ever since then I have felt awesome because I got to see her one more tiem and he didn't have a problem with it he was very nice about it and I think he may have even gained a little more respect for me. Well that's the sum up of that other than that I've just been working hard and moving out again because of a technicality life is great and it has been pretty much since I met Clairissa and it's not because of her it's because of me it's just inspired by her. I miss her every waking moment of my life but I'm not going to bore anyone with it anymore because in a year I'm going to be the happiest person on the face of this earth by God's grace and her fathers will LOL no really though the lord will guide me in the right direction he has all my life even when I didn't believe and yet somehow with all my disbelief he's still here for me. I'm going to work my but off now I have my drivers test on the 2nd of november so if I pull up to your house in my dodge dart you know why. I'm just going to keep being me and before I know it the year will have gone by and it's not until then that I become a complete man. Anyways that's it for now that was the summary of my life for two months wow long but not long enough I hope the Auto-Bio has more details LOL. Anyways until my next journal entry I love all of you guys and I thank you all for being with me throughout everything and putting up with listening to me whine and I know you do it because you're my friends so thanks.

This time I want to quote one of my favorite Comidiens ever one we just recently lost...
Quote: Rodney Dangerfield: "No respect, no respect at all."

RPG
P.S. This is so long there will be no editing thank you for understanding LOL.