The Problem at Hand (6/24)

[kalijackson]

Disclaimer: This is set in an A/U; I do not in anyway own Stargate characters or settings.

Author’s Note: Please R&R (sorry no witty comments today)

The Problem at Hand

Chapter 6: Operation Boonie Bear

There was an awkward silence as everyone looked around to make sure he was really missing. I looked at Kali, “Get out your map for Plan B.” Nodding she dug out a different map. Jack snapped, “What the hell is plan B?! Why the hell are there so many plans?!” Sam looked at him nervously, but said with a stern voice, “Sir…Calm down…We need to find Daniel.” Looking to me she continued, “What’s plan B?”

I gave Sam a grateful look, “Plan B is in case Daniel goes missing.” Jack, calmer now asked, “Why B? Why not D?” Kali answered for me, “Riley makes plans in order of most likely to happen…” Sam laughed, “Daniel going missing was more likely than being swarmed by fans?” I smiled, “Yea…kinda…maybe not, but Kali insisted I have a plan Boonie Bear.” Jack sat down, shocked by the silliness of it all. Kali pointed to a red dot on the plan B map, “This is the most likely spot we could have lost him at, a bookshop called The Tomb, and it specializes in all things Egyptian.”

Jack looked at us with a look of disbelief, “I gotta ask, are either of you military?” Kali and I grinned, “Well we both took the ASVAB…I don’t remember my score, but they said I was cut out for Engineering.” Jack looked at me expectantly. I followed Kali’s example, “I made a 98 and they wanted me for Military Intelligence.” Jack whistled, “Why didn’t you join?” I blushed a little, “I got pregnant.” Kali continued my answer, laughing, “Yea, for 3 straight years.” SMACK Kali rubbed her head, “That was not necessary.”

Standing up I said to everyone, “Alright, let’s go get Daniel before he gets into too much trouble.” As we started walking, I thought of something. “Hey Kali….Teal’c made a guy pee himself…” Teal’c spoke up then, “I did not make him, as you say, pee himself. He did it of his own free will.” The seriousness of his statement made it ten times funnier. Kali stopped laughing, “let me guess…someone hit on you again…sometimes I swear those dog tags say ‘Take me, I’m yours.” I rolled my eyes and Sam responded, “If only I had that problem.” Jack snapped at her, “Carter! Focus!” Sam cringed, “Sorry Sir…”

I looked up, “We’re here!” We all stared at the rather old looking bookstore; the whole building seemed to have dust on it. I sighed, “Kali…Lead the way.” We all followed her into the old and somewhat creepy store. She walked straight to the clerk at the counter, saying cheerfully, “Pyramids please!” The clerk smiled and pointed to a large sign in the back of the store.

We followed Kali to the sign then up some stairs to the third floor. The third floor was kinda secluded…..in fact this whole place was. All the books seemed so old and there were a lot of them. We split up to look for Daniel; the shelves were too tall to simply look over. I wondered around hoping to find him reading around the corner somewhere, when we all heard Kali, “Daniel!” I went to find her hoping I was wrong in thinking something bad had happened.

We all got there around the same time, to find Kali holding Daniel’s glasses and looking very upset. “I…I think someone hit him with Budge.” I rubbed the back of my head, “Well, there’s irony for ya.” Teal’c turned to me, “I do not understand.” Kali explained, “Well, it’s a large and heavy book that is completely full of shit.” Teal’c raised an eyebrow and Kali continued, “It’s the Egyptian book of the dead translated by a moron.” Teal’c nodded in understanding.

Jack shook his head, “That doesn’t tell us what happened…” I looked at Jack, “Yes it does…The only reason Daniel would have gone near that book is if there was someone needing help.” Jack nodded, “Yea...probably some damsel in distress.” I looked down muttering to myself about Jack being an idiot. Kali was loudly ranting about stupid girls, stupid guy things, and stupid Daniel. Sam tapped me on the shoulder, “Did Kali just call Daniel stupid?” I smiled at her, “Yea…he’s in trouble when we rescue him.”

Jack stepped up, “Rescue?” I nodded again, “Isn’t it obvious he was kidnapped…” Jack gave me a look I couldn’t figure out. “What’s the plan….I know you have one.” He said this with a look that said…no, screamed he hated it. I grinned, “Now you’re getting it…Kali, you know what to do.” Kali tucked the glasses in her pocket, “Follow me…” She almost ran down the stairs to the clerk, “You are going to tell me every person who walked in here in the last half hour.” The clerk looked surprised but didn’t argue, he seemed to think Kali would hurt him if he refused…Of course she probably would have.

The clerk replied nervously, “There was polite young man and then one of the regulars, nice young lady…” Kali grabbed the poor man’s shirt, “What’s her name and where does she live?!” I grabbed her hands, “Kali…let go…Kali…please let go…Murray, help.” Teal’c grabbed Kali around the waist, easily pulling her away. I turned to the clerk, “Um…sorry….she is just…worried…our friend, the polite young man…didn’t meet up with us…we just want to make sure he is okay.” The clerk smiled suddenly, turned to Kali, “I am so sorry for not understanding young lady, let me go write down the information for you.”

There was silence as everyone glanced at each other, Jack coughed, “Did that clerk just apologize to you for being assaulted?” Kali laughed a little, “Riley can handle almost any situation without violence.” I beamed with pride, “It’s a gift.” Jack looked between the two of us, “What do you do when that doesn’t work?” We didn’t get to answer; the clerk came back with the needed information.

The clerk smiled and handed Kali a small piece of paper, “Her name is Julia Smith, she lives right down the street, in a closed antique shop. The building owners let her live there because she has no family…sad story….I hope you find your friend.” Nodding Kali turned and headed out the door. We followed, not knowing exactly what would happen.

X~X~X~ Disappearing Danny ~X~X~X
(A/N: skips back to the crowd.)

Daniel heard Kali suggest the buddy system and before he knew it, she was holding on tightly to his arm. The crowd kept trying to move past them to get to Teal’c, it was crazy how people seemed willing to hurt others to see someone famous. Kali and Daniel lost sight of the others and things only seemed to be getting worse.

Daniel looked to Kali to ask if she could see any of the others, when he noticed how sick and panicked she looked. He decided that they had to get out of the crowd now, so he put his arm around Kali and tried to push through a bunch of girls. Unfortunately they were a group of psychotic fan girls; there was a better chance of getting through a brick wall. They got past maybe one person before girls started pushing and grabbing.

“Get out of the way!” a tall girl with a vicious look on her face exclaimed, as she attempted to yank kali down and away. Daniel got worried when he noticed that Kali was too out of it to do anything. He grabbed the girl’s hand and shouted for her to “Let Go!” Then someone went behind them and grabbed at him hoping to hurt him, the only thing they managed was to pull off the wig and let everyone know who he was. Daniel took the second of shocked silence to grab a hold of Kali again. Suddenly the girls started shrieking.

X~X~X

There was no way out of it and the crowd only seemed to get worse, suddenly there was a loud popping sound followed by someone shouting, “Get down, he’s got a gun!” Daniel glanced around at the surrounding bodies who had flung themselves to the floor and asked Kali, rather loudly, “Wasn’t that Riley’s voice? That isn’t…” Kali clamed her hand over his mouth so he wouldn’t tell anyone it was real gun fire. “Danny, do you see anyone?” Looking around he saw Sam standing up and looking lost. Pointing Kali started running toward her.

Sam noticed them and met them half way, “What was that?” Kali grinned, “Plan C….follow me.” Daniel wrapped his arm around Kali’s waist and when they were a safe distance from the crowd they stopped. “What’s Plan C?” Sam nodded in agreement of wanting to know. Kali grinned again, “Plan C is Riley’s plan for people recognizing you and swarming.” Sam blinked a few times, “She planed for that?” Kali nodded, “She is like a paranoid boy scout, always prepared, for anything, anytime.” Daniel and Sam chuckled at this.

Kali continued, “We have to go to the rendezvous point now, Sam would you take the map?” Sam nodded taking the map and motioning which direction they should take. They walked in silence for a few minutes before Sam spoke up, “So, Kali…this has been bugging me…I know gun fire and that wasn’t gun fire…What was that?” Kali chuckled, “Knowing Riley, it was fireworks. She always says that a person is smart but people are stupid and panicky…..guess she was right.”

Sam shook her head, “Aren’t fireworks illegal almost all the time…Where did she get them?” Kali shrugged, “I try not to ask questions I might not want the answer to.” Pausing she noticed that Daniel was still attached to her. “Um…Danny…You can let go if you want.” Daniel shook his head, “If I let go of you, I am pretty sure Riley might kill me.”

Kali stopped removing his arm from her waist, “Riley might kill you? Don’t worry about it.” Kali gave him a light shove, “I am a big girl, I can take care of myself.” With that she started walking again, quickly. Sam started to move to catch up to her stopping to say to Daniel, “Smooth…real smooth.” Daniel looked at the two women walking ahead of him, muttering to himself, “What did I do?”

X~X~X

He walked slowly, several feet behind Sam and Kali, who were talking quietly to themselves. He still didn’t know what he did to get Kali mad at him or Sam irritated. He decided that this whole situation was very silly and sped up to join them, accidently eavesdropping on their conversation. Kali had a hurt look on her face as she spoke to Sam, “Sometimes he acts like he likes me, but then he says something like that…” Sam gave a sheepish smile, “Yea…for a smart guy…he can be really stupid.”

Daniel was so engrossed in what the girls were saying that he tripped and landed with a quiet thud. He sat up, wondering how he managed to get into these messes. When he stood up he noticed the building next to him. A very old looking building with an equally old looking sign that said “The Tomb: Books on all things Egyptian.” Daniel looked to Sam and Kali who were getting further away, thinking to himself, I won’t be in there that long.

He walked in to find himself facing an old man who welcomed him into his shop and asked if he needed any help. Daniel smiled, “Yes, Can you please point me to section covering pyramids?” The old man’s eyes seem to light up, “You are such a polite young man…To the back, third floor.”

X~X~X

The clerk watched as Daniel made his way to the stairs in the back, turning when he heard his door open again. He smiled, recognizing this customer, “Hello there Julia….Got your order in……are you alright?” The other customer, Julia was staring at the stairway, “Um…Joe…who was that guy, he looks familiar.” The Clerk, Joe shrugged, “Don’t know, but he was very polite…..here’s your order.” he said picking up a book from behind the counter.

Taking her book she decided to go find that ‘polite guy’ and headed to the stairway. Daniel had busied himself looking at the books on the subject of pyramids, hoping to glimpse something familiar. He didn’t noticed that he was being stared at rather intently, in fact he didn’t notice anyone one else was there until he heard a quiet voice behind him.

“Um…I know you don’t work here, but….could you help me find something?” Daniel blinked a few times before responding, “I could try…What are you looking for?” The girl got a surprised look on her face when Daniel started to get concerned, “Are you okay?” The girl seemed to stumble over her words, “yea…just…surprised you will help…I need…to find a book on the architecture of pyramids.”

He smiled awkwardly as he led the way to the bottom of a self, “I think I saw just what you need over here…” Julia shifted her weight nervously as she thought about the plan in her head. She was thinking that maybe it was a bad idea but…then again, when would she get a chance like this ever again. She took a deep breath and stepped forward pulling a large book down on Daniel’s head.

There was a soft and a somewhat sickening thud as Daniel slumped to the ground unconscious. Julia rolled him on his back and shook him a bit. I can’t believe it’s really him…This is so great…I can’t wait for us to get home, She thought to her self. She knew that getting him out of the building wouldn’t be hard; she spent a lot of time in Joe’s shop. Getting him home would be the trouble.

X~X~X

Daniel woke to a soft voice calling the name Michael, his head was pounding and his vision blurry, though that wasn’t surprising without his glasses. Groggily he mumbled, “Who’s Michael?” His vision cleared up but was still a bit blurry, he saw the girl from the book store looking at him with concern. “You’re Michael silly…that book must have hit harder than I thought.” Daniel started to shift uncomfortably when he noticed some very important details, one he was no longer in the book store.  Two, that girl was calling him Michael and giving him the creeps. Three and probably most important, he was now tied to a chair.

“Um….Miss?...I think you are confused…” Daniel tried to focus his eyes knowing it wouldn’t help, and then heard the girl from the store reply. “My name’s Julia, remember….I thought you were listening...” Daniel got a worried look on his face, “…I was unconscious…” Julia shook her head lightly giggling, “That’s not an excuse to not listen…” Daniel shook his head slightly, wondering again how he gets into these situations, “Right…I need to be getting back to my friends now, so…” Julia frowned, looking at Daniel with intensity, “I’m your friend…” she paused with a thoughtful look, then smiling continued, “You’ll like it here with me.”

Daniel couldn’t hide the ‘you’re crazy’ look that flashed on his face, “With you?” Julia frowned again, “Don’t you want to stay with me Michael?” Daniel just stared at her a minute not sure how to respond when she started to cry. “You really don’t want to stay with me…” She sniffed and suddenly seemed furious, “That won’t do at all.”

Daniel tried to lift his hands in front of him forgetting his hands were tied, “Wait…I think you are confused….” Julia smiled taking a few steps toward him, “That was a mean joke Michael….” Daniel finally had it, “STOP CALLING ME THAT!” A stunned Julia grinned, “That’s your name silly…enough with this silly bickering…”

X~X~X~ On the Way ~X~X~X
(A/N: skips back to the others on the way to find Daniel.)

The Clerk had said it wasn’t far away but with everyone being silent it seemed to take forever. Fortunately I wasn’t the only one to think so, Jack turned to Sam and Kali to ask, “So, how exactly did you lose Daniel?” Sam coughed a bit and Kali looked down, and then answered, “I kinda got mad at him and walked ahead of him…”

I looked at her in mock horror, “Oh dear lord…He talked didn’t he?” Jack smirked, adding, “Yup, that’ll do it.” Kali huffed a little, “Hey Daniel doesn’t get people mad by simply opening his mouth you know.” Sam smiled sweetly, “Yea, he just isn’t great with the ladies.”

Jack chimed in, “Oh, he said something that kind of stupid…” I chuckled, “Figures” turning to the only silent one of the bunch I added, “What do you think Teal’c?” Raising an eyebrow he responded simply, “I think we should proceed to DanielJackson’s location.” We all paused a moment before simultaneously saying, “Right!”

I sighed, “We’ll be there in a few minutes, let’s stop here and get ready.” Jack raised an eyebrow, “Get ready?” I smiled, “Yup…..Kali, need you over here.” We dug through our bags for things they would need. Standing up I got out some breathing masks for everyone. Jack looked from me to the masks then to Kali before asking, “What is going on and where did you get those?”

Kali shook her head out of both nervousness and humor. I grinned thinking, this ought to be interesting. “Well I figure we can get Daniel away from a girl easily, but just in case we can’t….Kali and I have a project.” Sam piped up, “What kind of project?” Jack quirked an eyebrow, “Yea, what kind of project?” Kali took up an innocent face, “Knock out gas…”

Jack was clearly surprised, “Where the hell did you get knock out gas?!” I answered for Kali, “We didn’t get it…..we made it.” Sam suddenly seemed interested, “What did you use?” Kali seemed eager to answer but was interrupted by Jack, “Carter, I really don’t want to know…Let’s just rescue Daniel.” I looked straight at Jack, “Hey…Don’t make it sound like we’re criminals.” Jack almost laughed, “yea well, let’s count….you’re a con artist, Kali seems a little off, you have invisible kids and….oh yea you made Knock out gas.”

Kali chimed in before I could respond, “Hey I haven’t done any thing…why do I seem ‘off’?” Jack shrugged, “Honestly, because you hang out with her.” He said motioning to me. Kali simply responded with “I see your point.” I should’ve seen that coming, “Kali!...First off, Jack, I am not a con artist or I would be rich. Second, my kids are real and you will be experiencing that soon. Third, there is a good reason for the knock out gas…”

Jack gave me an expecting look, “Which is?” I just looked down and then I heard Kali’s voice, “She’s embarrassed about it…we made it to catch some kittens under her house, the animal shelter would just kill them.” Both Jack and Sam stared at us in disbelief, “Kittens?” I shook my head, “Yes, look you don’t trust me I get it, here get rid of it, we don’t need it….I am not a bad person just tell me what you need to trust me already.” I shoved the knock out gas and the masks at him and stood back waiting for and answer.

I got tired of waiting and picked up my bag and started to walk to our destination. Behind me I heard Kali yell at him, “I don’t give a damn whether you trust me or not, but we need to rescue Daniel, so get your ass in gear!” Kali came to walk next to me and we heard Sam, “Sir?” followed by Jack answering “Carter, Teal’c, let’s go.” So we all headed into the building we hoped held Daniel.

X~X~X

The building’s bottom floor was a closed down antique shop like the Clerk said, so now we had to find the entrance to the second floor. I pulled a lock pick kit out of my pocket and handed it to Sam, catching the look Jack was giving me. Kali must have caught it to because she said, “Her kids lock her out of the house….a lot.” Jack tilted his head to the side, “I thought they were toddlers…” Kali smiled and I responded, “They are, they’re just talented.” Sam walked to us handed the set back to me, “Door is open Riley…” I grinned, “Actually I think Jack should lead from here on in….storming a castle is not my forte.”

Jack led the way into the antique shop; there was a straight pathway to a counter in the back. Behind that there were some stairs, everyone was silent and we could here faint voices from upstairs. Looking around I said, “I guess he’s up there.” And Kali ran up the stairs, with everyone following closely behind.

I wasn’t prepared for the sight before me and neither was anyone else, especially Kali. Daniel was tied to a chair, looking very uncomfortable and for good reason. Straddling him had to be his kidnapper, Julia. She seemed to be trying to kiss him and to Daniel’s credit, he was doing a good job of avoiding her. I hesitated but looked at Kali anyways, she was pissed, the kind of angry that kept you frozen in one place and somehow I knew that wouldn’t last long.

Turning I saw a look of shock on Sam, a raised eyebrow on Teal’c, and a look of amusement on Jack. Before anyone could find something to say Kali marched forward and yanked Julia off of Daniel with enough force for her to slide a few feet on the floor. Then she started to yell at Daniel, “What do you think you are doing?!” Daniel stared at her in disbelief, “I’m tied to a Chair!” he yelled back. I turned to Jack and Sam, “Anyone bring popcorn?”

Kali glared back at Daniel, “Well if you didn’t walk off, you wouldn’t be tied to a chair!” Daniel rolled his eyes, “If you hadn’t of gotten mad for no reason, I wouldn’t have walked off!” Kali was so mad she almost smiled, “No Reason! If you weren’t a stupid jerk I wouldn’t have gotten mad!” That’s when Jack chimed in, “She’s got you there Daniel.” Sam added a quiet, “Yup.” Daniel and Kali yelled, “Stay out of it!” I sighed, “We get it, you’re mad at each other…Can we move on now?” Teal’c agreed, “Indeed.” Then Daniel and Kali yelled at us, “Shut up!” Teal’c simply responded with, “I will not…You should untie DanielJackson.”

Kali grumbled a little, saying “yea, yea, yea,” as she went around to the back of the chair to untie Daniel. Seeing that untying him would not be quick or easy she pulled out her pocket knife and told Daniel, “Don’t squirm, I have to cut these.” As she set to cutting through the rope tying up Daniel, no one noticed Julia or that she was suddenly gone from the floor.

We were all entranced and oddly entertained by Daniel and Kali’s bickering. Since our eyes were on the two of them, we didn’t see Julia or the knife she held. No one did until we heard a psychotic sounding voice shout, “She can’t have you!” Julia lunged forward toward Daniel. Kali saw what was about to happen and dropping her pocket knife, stood up and moved herself in front of Daniel.

Everything seemed to stop as Julia stepped back with a bloody knife in her hand. Daniel had somehow gotten free and caught Kali as she fell. I just stood there a second, and then ran to Julia who tried to defend herself with the knife. She swung wildly in front of her until I pointed behind her; she was just paranoid and crazy enough to look. I hit her knocking her to the ground and didn’t stop until Jack grabbed me around the waist and pulled me off of her.

X~X~X

Daniel lowered Kali to the ground trying not to shake her looked down to check the wound. He lifted her shirt, revealing her abdomen which was already covered in blood and grimaced. If nothing was done she could very well bleed out, applying pressure to the wound to the best of his ability he began to talk to her to keep her conscious. “Come on Kali…Open your eyes.” Daniel gave her a concerned look when she didn’t, running his fingers through her hair, he tried again. “Kali, stay with me…”

“Always.” Came the groggy reply, as Kali opened her eyes slightly. Daniel smiled both at her response and her consciousness, “You know that was a really stupid thing you did…” Kali grinned slightly, “Yea…well now we’re even.” Daniel shook his head softly, “You’re really hurt, you know.” Kali smiled, “Yea…” Daniel saw her eyes close again and called for someone to hurry up and help.

Next Chapter: Misunderstanding
The story is now over…Just kidding……