Dexter
aka Dexter Cornelius Hapsgood III, my mom's basset hound, has crossed over. We have no idea exactly when this happened. Mom found his lifeless body in the yard Monday afternoon. I knew it was going to happen that way, and that he would cross alone. I knew it, but of course could not prevent it. We don't know how or why. Maybe mom forgot to feed him for a few days. Maybe it was the heat. Maybe it was old age. Maybe...?
Staring at this body I felt more than a few conflicting emotions:
Gratitude that he chose to spend his life in our company.
Sadness and regret for how negligent my mom was to him when he got replaced in her life by Patches; for my failing to rescue him from her.
Relief that he'd gone home after a life where loneliness was thrust upon him.
Awe at the force that causes life. (The body only sustains life, it does not create it.)
Assorted others that I cannot identify.
I also felt like it was a sacred moment - if that makes sense. I don't know of another way to describe it. I felt an automatic prayer to the Goddess, even though I did a more conscious one a bit later. I guess I'm feeling like both life and death are sacred events, and shouldn't be created, or taken, lightly. As much as I feel that living is a huge pain-in-the-ass that I would never choose while sober, the presence of the Divine in the living (and dead to a certain extent) is, well, awesome!
Dexter Cornelius Hapsgood III (1994-2006)
Happy trails sweet boy!
Staring at this body I felt more than a few conflicting emotions:
Gratitude that he chose to spend his life in our company.
Sadness and regret for how negligent my mom was to him when he got replaced in her life by Patches; for my failing to rescue him from her.
Relief that he'd gone home after a life where loneliness was thrust upon him.
Awe at the force that causes life. (The body only sustains life, it does not create it.)
Assorted others that I cannot identify.
I also felt like it was a sacred moment - if that makes sense. I don't know of another way to describe it. I felt an automatic prayer to the Goddess, even though I did a more conscious one a bit later. I guess I'm feeling like both life and death are sacred events, and shouldn't be created, or taken, lightly. As much as I feel that living is a huge pain-in-the-ass that I would never choose while sober, the presence of the Divine in the living (and dead to a certain extent) is, well, awesome!
Dexter Cornelius Hapsgood III (1994-2006)
Happy trails sweet boy!