this will most likely be unproductive, seeing as I'm sitting in the middle of the room and even though no one is here, I am still painfully aware that they will be
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Re: great blogkaleidescopesNovember 8 2009, 00:58:58 UTC
I think you misunderstand what I am saying.
I am not trying to "feel" ...I do not want to wallow in misery and self pity. I have been trying to find a way to live in this world that is satisfactory, and I am afraid it might not be possible.
This is not a rant fueled by self dissatisfaction. I am not engulfed in some inner turmoil about the person I could not be and yet want to be. I like myself and my soul just fine. I am not dissatisfied with the path I have taken in my life. I am dissatisfied with the state of our culture and our world and the inability for a peaceful existence. The "rat race" you might say...ah I fear I am explaining this poorly.
People, in general, experience a great deal of anxiety and greed and loneliness in this life. The wealth is concentrated in the hands of the few and we don't want to change this system because we toil away trying to become one of those few. Everyone has the opportunity to become rich and famous and that is why this system will prevail, and anyone who does not make it to at least the middle tier is just not trying hard enough. And if we reach the top, we must be forever vigilant, because those below will always be trying to take our gold away. And so we are still anxious, and we are still lonely. We are not peaceful.
I am not looking for religion or a meditation exercise or some sort of activity to inspire peace from within.
What I am searching for is this: Is there a way, any way at all, to live outside of this system? I do not believe so. One can grow their own food but they still must purchase the land. one can build their own house but must purchase the materials. There are very few cultures still thriving completely outside of us. And one cannot just up and join them.
I am not trying to "feel" ...I do not want to wallow in misery and self pity. I have been trying to find a way to live in this world that is satisfactory, and I am afraid it might not be possible.
This is not a rant fueled by self dissatisfaction. I am not engulfed in some inner turmoil about the person I could not be and yet want to be. I like myself and my soul just fine. I am not dissatisfied with the path I have taken in my life. I am dissatisfied with the state of our culture and our world and the inability for a peaceful existence. The "rat race" you might say...ah I fear I am explaining this poorly.
People, in general, experience a great deal of anxiety and greed and loneliness in this life. The wealth is concentrated in the hands of the few and we don't want to change this system because we toil away trying to become one of those few. Everyone has the opportunity to become rich and famous and that is why this system will prevail, and anyone who does not make it to at least the middle tier is just not trying hard enough. And if we reach the top, we must be forever vigilant, because those below will always be trying to take our gold away. And so we are still anxious, and we are still lonely. We are not peaceful.
I am not looking for religion or a meditation exercise or some sort of activity to inspire peace from within.
What I am searching for is this: Is there a way, any way at all, to live outside of this system? I do not believe so. One can grow their own food but they still must purchase the land. one can build their own house but must purchase the materials. There are very few cultures still thriving completely outside of us. And one cannot just up and join them.
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