Why I should not be allowed on the Internets reason #2674
So I was flipping through random profiles over on the Pit -- I tend to randomly check out profiles of reviewers/favouriters/whatever just for kicks -- and I happened across one where they mention how - just once - they would like to see a band!fic where it isn't girls band vs boys band BATTLE OF THE SEXAAAAAAAS, which apparently most band!fic seems to be.
Huh, I thought. I haven't read band!fic in ages. Possibly because most of it does tend to be rather horrible, at least the band!fic I've come across, but. I thought it was awesome ten years ago!
And then, a truly horrible thought bubbled in to existence: I should write Transformers band!fic.
I-I know, it's horrible. But it just wouldn't leave me alone. It would be Autobots vs Decepticons, except they are opposing bands fighting for the title of hottest new group! The clean-cut Autobots, who just want to sing and play and have fun and bring music to everyone, and possibly save orphanages with their hard-won cash. And the edgy Decepticons who want money and fame and to be lusted over loved by everyone because they are just that cool and they also possibly practice semi-shady dealings in their efforts to rise to the top.
I may have possibly watched too much Jem and the Holograms as a child, what?
Anyways, you'd have Megatron as lead singer and Starscream as the wangsty second guitarist who has a total emo haircut and one of those whiny voices that seem to be popular among certain fans -- you know the kind I'm talking of -- who's always making snide remarks about how if he was the lead singer they totally would have blown those pathetic Autobots out of the water by now. He may or may not have a totally obvious crush on the 'Bots quiet keyboardist, Prowl, who is the only one who is oblivious about it. But then, Prowl's also totally oblivious to the fact that he has more fangirls than all the other 'Bots put together. Something about that quiet, intense aura he puts out seems to bring the girls in droves, and it doesn't really help much that he appears to be in some sort of ambiguous relationship with the exuberant sax player, Jazz.
Soundwave is the 'Cons keyboardist, because headspace is currently demanding that the quiet ones are on the keyboard. He might have a thing for Jazz but he's so ridiculously subtle that very few people even guess it. He also might have a thing for Starscream, but it's hard to tell. Rumble is the drummer, of course, because he's tiny and energetic and loves hitting things. He also tends to go out with Skywarp, who plays...some sort of woodwind or brass, I think, maybe he does sax too, and they go out looking for girls and hitting on everything with breasts (and quite a few without). Thundercracker plays bass and is dark and moody and the fangirls go crazy over him and it tends to annoy him more than anything.
Sideswipe is on drums -- he says it's to get chicks, 'cause chicks dig the sticks -- and Sunny plays bass, and unlike TC absolutely soaks up the admiration of his legions of fans. He doesn't like it when they occasionally slip by security, however -- it's okay if they look, 'cause god he's beautiful, but heaven forbid they touch.
Optimus is lead singer, of course, because Megatron needs someone to snipe at on the other side, and he's ridiculously earnest in the whole 'I want to share my music with everyone and make the world a better place!' kind of way that the fangirls tend to soak up. He's actually a fairly decent songwriter except that everything he writes tends to be all 'ganbatte FAITO! :DDDDD' and if Jazz didn't write songs too or tinker with Optimus' they'd probably be singing at kiddy shows forever.
There's probably a few other characters mixed in to the bands, not to mention their agents and crazy stalker-fans -- Shockwave takes his support of the 'Cons to almost ridiculous extents but Megatron doesn't exactly discourage him because he might be obsessed, but he's still a loyal minion -- I mean fan -- and is occasionally useful. And they have crazy hijniks and awesome times and there's totally a time when they're all outrunning fans while singing some snazzy musical number a la A Hard Day's Night.
And then, in a surprise shocker: both bands are beaten out of the Big Contest by the underdog group of the Femmes, who blow them all out of the water with their awesome vocals and shiny miniskirts, with Elita-1 at the forefront blaring out "Nobody, nobody but yoooooouuuuuuu!"
...I think maybe I need to sleep or something. Lack of sleep has to be the contributing factor to my current craziness.
Huh, I thought. I haven't read band!fic in ages. Possibly because most of it does tend to be rather horrible, at least the band!fic I've come across, but. I thought it was awesome ten years ago!
And then, a truly horrible thought bubbled in to existence: I should write Transformers band!fic.
I-I know, it's horrible. But it just wouldn't leave me alone. It would be Autobots vs Decepticons, except they are opposing bands fighting for the title of hottest new group! The clean-cut Autobots, who just want to sing and play and have fun and bring music to everyone, and possibly save orphanages with their hard-won cash. And the edgy Decepticons who want money and fame and to be lusted over loved by everyone because they are just that cool and they also possibly practice semi-shady dealings in their efforts to rise to the top.
I may have possibly watched too much Jem and the Holograms as a child, what?
Anyways, you'd have Megatron as lead singer and Starscream as the wangsty second guitarist who has a total emo haircut and one of those whiny voices that seem to be popular among certain fans -- you know the kind I'm talking of -- who's always making snide remarks about how if he was the lead singer they totally would have blown those pathetic Autobots out of the water by now. He may or may not have a totally obvious crush on the 'Bots quiet keyboardist, Prowl, who is the only one who is oblivious about it. But then, Prowl's also totally oblivious to the fact that he has more fangirls than all the other 'Bots put together. Something about that quiet, intense aura he puts out seems to bring the girls in droves, and it doesn't really help much that he appears to be in some sort of ambiguous relationship with the exuberant sax player, Jazz.
Soundwave is the 'Cons keyboardist, because headspace is currently demanding that the quiet ones are on the keyboard. He might have a thing for Jazz but he's so ridiculously subtle that very few people even guess it. He also might have a thing for Starscream, but it's hard to tell. Rumble is the drummer, of course, because he's tiny and energetic and loves hitting things. He also tends to go out with Skywarp, who plays...some sort of woodwind or brass, I think, maybe he does sax too, and they go out looking for girls and hitting on everything with breasts (and quite a few without). Thundercracker plays bass and is dark and moody and the fangirls go crazy over him and it tends to annoy him more than anything.
Sideswipe is on drums -- he says it's to get chicks, 'cause chicks dig the sticks -- and Sunny plays bass, and unlike TC absolutely soaks up the admiration of his legions of fans. He doesn't like it when they occasionally slip by security, however -- it's okay if they look, 'cause god he's beautiful, but heaven forbid they touch.
Optimus is lead singer, of course, because Megatron needs someone to snipe at on the other side, and he's ridiculously earnest in the whole 'I want to share my music with everyone and make the world a better place!' kind of way that the fangirls tend to soak up. He's actually a fairly decent songwriter except that everything he writes tends to be all 'ganbatte FAITO! :DDDDD' and if Jazz didn't write songs too or tinker with Optimus' they'd probably be singing at kiddy shows forever.
There's probably a few other characters mixed in to the bands, not to mention their agents and crazy stalker-fans -- Shockwave takes his support of the 'Cons to almost ridiculous extents but Megatron doesn't exactly discourage him because he might be obsessed, but he's still a loyal minion -- I mean fan -- and is occasionally useful. And they have crazy hijniks and awesome times and there's totally a time when they're all outrunning fans while singing some snazzy musical number a la A Hard Day's Night.
And then, in a surprise shocker: both bands are beaten out of the Big Contest by the underdog group of the Femmes, who blow them all out of the water with their awesome vocals and shiny miniskirts, with Elita-1 at the forefront blaring out "Nobody, nobody but yoooooouuuuuuu!"
...I think maybe I need to sleep or something. Lack of sleep has to be the contributing factor to my current craziness.