[I59] IT GETS LONELY EARLY (2/2)
Prompt Code: I59
Title: It Gets Lonely Early
Kyungsoo didn’t know how he was supposed to react when Jongin texted him late one night, asking him, ‘Hyung, what are we going to have lunch for tomorrow?’
At first, he felt oddly pleased that Jongin referred to the both of them as ‘we’. He felt his chest warm as he bit his lip, trying to hold back a smile even though there was no one to see except for Baguette. And the fact that they finally exchanged numbers a few days back hadn’t been in vain after all; Jongin actually wanted to have some sort of communication with him besides coming over to see Baguette.
Then Kyungsoo caught himself just before his thoughts drifted off into fantasy and scowled, rolling his eyes at the text. Sure, Jongin had said ‘we’ but he probably didn’t mean it that way.
More like we as in Jongin and Baguette, Kyungsoo thought mournfully. Jongin was guilty of feeding Baguette at the table sometimes; that counted as a date in a way, right?
Side-eyeing Baguette as she slept at the foot of his bed, he typed out a short reply, ‘Haven’t really thought about it yet. Why? Do you have something in mind?’
He tried to return to his homework, but Kyungsoo was too jittery to solve any equations when his mind was filled with anticipation of what Jongin might have in mind. Kyungsoo tapped a foot under his table anxiously for a few minutes, dropping his mechanical pencil over his notes the second his phone pinged loudly. Baguette’s ears flicked on the bed at the sudden noise.
‘Was hoping you’d say that. Can I bring food over tomorrow for a change? :)’
Kyungsoo lifted an eyebrow at Jongin’s reply. That sounds like a date, he thought. But it didn’t sound like a normal date… He was no expert in courtship in any way, but bringing food over to someone’s house instead of eating out didn’t sound like an impressive first date. Unless he was bringing food for Baguette, which would make sense.
“Oh,” Kyungsoo pursed his lips, feeling a little dumb. Of course. Why would Jongin ask him out in the first place? “For fuck’s sake, Kyungsoo,” he whispered under his breath to himself.
‘Sounds cool. Do I have to prepare anything?’
Kyungsoo would probably have to prepare one of the empty rooms down the hallway for Jongin to move in with Baguette. He was willing to bet that Jongin was fed up of travelling here so often, and he was going to ask for Kyungsoo’s blessing to propose to Baguette. Wouldn’t be a complete surprise since he’d been stopping by enough times that Kyungsoo often wondered if Jongin ever got enough studying done. Surely making a conscious effort to play with a dog every week was making a mark on his grades?
But then again, Kyungsoo couldn’t really complain. He hated how Jongin’s smile made him feel too warm inside yet he looked forward to Jongin’s visits every day like some lovesick puppy, and only wished that Jongin was smiling for him and not for his dog.
Why is he so hot? Kyungsoo moaned mournfully in his throat. Why God, why?
His phone buzzed again, and Kyungsoo sighed as he reached for it, reading the reply: ‘Nothing at all!! Maybe some ice, but I don’t think it’ll be necessary.’
Good God, what was Jongin up to? Now Kyungsoo was starting to afraid, especially as he really didn’t know what to expect from Jongin.
He was everything Kyungsoo wanted but also everything he didn’t quite expect Jongin to be, dog over-enthusiast included. Who knew what he wanted to do with the ice? Give Baguette some kind of ice bath?
A full five minutes later of mulling and cursing at himself, ‘Okay,’ was all Kyungsoo could manage into a text without revealing his mixed emotions.
He didn’t know why he felt so jittery with excitement, though he chalked it up to the fact that it was a surprise and he never had much experience with that. Admittedly, it was rather nice of Jongin to do anything at all in the first place, no matter who he had in mind for this surprise. They didn’t owe each other anything in the first place.
Kyungsoo curled up on his chair, wrapping his arms around himself.
-
The next night, Kyungsoo was chewing on his nails at the mirror, wondering if he was under-dressed or over-dressed for the occasion, whatever it was.
Was he even supposed to be dressed for the occasion? Did Baguette have to be in her ratchet pink dress? He didn’t really know, but he supposed chinos and his favourite dark gray long sleeved tee was acceptable. As for Baguette, he made her wear a snug little jumper just in case.
It was cool once more tonight, so Kyungsoo supposed she could wear it though she’d have to take it off if Jongin was going to play with her. He didn’t want Baguette to be cooked to death from sweating and panting beneath all that thick fluff.
“What do you think he wants to do?” Kyungsoo asked Baguette, picking her up from his bed and holding her at eye level. She blinked innocently at him. His mystery evening had been playing on his mind all day long, rendering him half-distracted for the most part till he almost burned his frying pan in the afternoon when he forgot he left it on the stove.
“I bet he’s going to want to buy you. Would you miss me if he did?” Kyungsoo continue to say. Baguette looked to left, disinterested. Kyungsoo pursed his lips. “Of course you wouldn’t. I personally wouldn’t either, not when Jongin looks that good all the time.”
Tucking her under his arm, Kyungsoo left his room to wait for Jongin; he was bound to arrive any minute now, and Kyungsoo’s heart was thundering in his chest.
He kept trying to guess at Jongin’s motives might be; could it be a special day or something today? Was it a day of celebration in any way at all, or were his intentions more intimate? Kyungsoo really couldn’t say, given his lack of experience in all this. Or maybe he just wants to make up for all the free dinners and lunches so far, Kyungsoo thought.
That would be pretty damned disappointing. Kyungsoo rubbed Baguette’s soft paw with his finger nervously.
“Do you think this is a prank maybe, Baguette? Like some kind of frat boy antic - ”
The doorbell rang, and Kyungsoo started, glancing at the front door. Baguette’s ears were perked upwards too, eyes bright with curiosity. They both stared for a moment. “Guess he’s here,” Kyungsoo muttered, shuffling over to the front door to let Jongin in.
He certainly had been expecting the human embodiment of hotness at the gates, but what he did not expect was Jongin to look even hotter tonight, with his hair stylishly tossed to one side and denim jacket hanging over his shoulders as he stood there patiently. He looked like some kind of tanned, Greek god just standing there. Kyungsoo gawked for a brief second before he remembered himself and put on his new slippers to walk over and unlock the gates for Jongin.
“Hey,” Jongin said brightly, smile warm and friendly.
“Hi…” Baguette wriggled in Kyungsoo’s hold, panting at the sight of Jongin (he didn’t blame her for feeling thirsty).
“You look great, hyung, did you just come back from an event or something?” Jongin asked as Kyungsoo fumbled with the lock and his keys.
“N-No…” Kyungsoo replied under his breath. He looked like nothing next to Jongin, who was terribly illegal and rude to show up at Kyungsoo’s house looking like this, with a big, bulky picnic basket at his feet -
“Wait, wait, why do you have a picnic basket with you?” Kyungsoo asked, interrupting his own thoughts. Jongin beamed at him over the gates, bouncing on the balls of his feet. Kyungsoo struggled to maintain eye contact.
“Well, that’s… kind of the surprise, hyung. We’re having a picnic!” Jongin said eagerly.
“But where?” Kyungsoo blinked. There was no playground or hill for miles around, and Kyungsoo didn’t see how having a picnic indoors could still be considered a legitimate picnic. It would just be a meal.
Jongin pointed at the large patch of grass right beside Kyungsoo. “On your front lawn, hyung.”
Kyungsoo looked at his lawn as if he’d never seen it before. Well, now that he thought about it, his lawn was an alright place to have a picnic but… “My lawn?” he echoed.
“Yeah,” Jongin laughed, eyes crinkling up into a bashful smile. Kyungsoo laughed slowly too, the absurdity of the situation fully sinking in right then. “That is the dumbest idea I’ve ever heard of, Jongin,” he stated plainly.
Baguette was wagging her tail violently now, thumping at Kyungsoo’s back repeatedly.
Jongin shoved at the gates, blowing up his cheeks like a child. “No, it’s not. Let me in and I’ll show you how fun it can be,” he replied petulantly.
And against all of his good sense and knowing full well how ridiculous they were going to look later on, Kyungsoo proceeded to plant Baguette gently on the ground to unlock the gates properly for Jongin to come in.
He picked up the picnic basket and entered the premises, walking right onto the grass with Baguette skipping after him happily. Jongin turned in a full circle, looking for a good spot and also giving Kyungsoo a full three sixty degrees’ view of just how good he looked tonight.
“The grass is damp, Jongin, I just watered the lawn two hours ago,” Kyungsoo called, locking the gates once more because he didn’t want to get robbed while they were on Jongin’s ludicrous idea of a picnic.
Jongin placed the basket down without heeding Kyungsoo’s words and picked Baguette up, squishing her gently between his hands in greeting. Kyungsoo walked over to join them, feeling kinda sour since he did spend at least fifteen minutes (more than he ever needed to in his entire life) to decide on what to wear for this not-so-auspicious occasion.
And the picnic basket looked pretty light when Jongin was holding it, so he wouldn’t even bat an eye if it was just full of treats for Baguette and just a packet of chips for the both of them.
“Don’t worry about the wet grass, hyung,” Jongin looked over his shoulder as he cuddled Baguette to his chest. “I brought a cloth for us to sit on and everything. Paper plates too,” Jongin added, as if he already knew what Kyungsoo was thinking.
Begrudgingly, Kyungsoo had to admit Jongin actually seemed pretty prepared for this picnic. Once he was done showering Baguette with love, Jongin got down on his knees, probably dirtying his jeans in the process, to flip the basket open. He dragged out the cloth Kyungsoo assumed he was talking about and shook it out, inching backwards a bit to lay it on the ground at the right spot. Kyungsoo just stood aside numbly as Jongin moved about.
“Jongin, this cloth is big enough to fit five people,” Kyungsoo pointed out when the whole cloth covered a big patch of the wet grass. Baguette managed to slide under one of its corners and began to move from left to right under the cloth like a suspicious lump.
“I know. I got it from Baekhyun’s mom. Wasn’t easy to get all this stuff together,” Jongin laughed lightly, bringing out more things from the basket and setting them on the cloth. Among the things was a table lamp (absolutely ridiculous looking, considering everything else), paper plates, cups and napkins, and one small, foldable stool (even more ridiculous than the lamp).
“Jongin, I don’t think you quite grasp the traditional concept of a picnic,” Kyungsoo started to say, getting down on his knees reluctantly.
“Sure I do. I just brought some extra stuff because it’s pretty dark here, and I wanted to make sure everything was just perfect,” Jongin replied. As Kyungsoo inched closer, he could smell pizza, and his instincts proved him correct when Jongin took out two large boxes of pizza from the basket.
His spirits were only dampened by a packet of dog treats on top of the first pizza box, but Kyungsoo could overlook that, thanks to the pizza. And this was more than Kyungsoo ever thought Jongin would do.
“But Jongin, you don’t have a plug to turn on the lamp - ”
“It works with Bluetooth, hyung. I can light it up with my phone,” Jongin said reassuringly. Kyungsoo took the pizza boxes from him while Jongin fiddled with the lamp, just in time for Baguette to finally emerge from under the cloth and scamper over to sniff at the pizza inquisitively.
“No pizza for you,” Kyungsoo said warningly, “all you’re gonna get are treats tonight,” he waved the packet of treats tantalizingly above Baguette’s head. She stared at it for a moment, and sat down obediently.
“Aw, that’s so cute, hyung,” Jongin gushed, the lamp flickering on. It was one of those lamps with a neck that could bend into any direction, and Jongin adjusted it at an angle so light shone over the expanse of the cloth and they could see everything a little more clearly.
“I still don’t understand why we’re having a picnic in my front yard, Jongin,” Kyungsoo said honestly.
He looked around for a spot to put the pizza boxes down on while he spoke, and Jongin patted on the stool. “This is going to have to be our table for now, hyung,” he smiled. It was just the right height, though a little small, and Kyungsoo set the large pizza boxes over it carefully in case it tipped over.
Jongin busied himself as he replied Kyungsoo, “Also, we’re not just having a picnic tonight, hyung. I mean, I wanted to feed you this time because you’re always cooking food for me and everything, but we’re also going to do something else after we eat.”
“What are we going to do?” Kyungsoo asked, a little less excited than two seconds ago. Play with Baguette and feed her treats if she’s extra cute? he thought grimly. Which wasn’t an entirely bad idea, but it wasn’t a whole new concept to Kyungsoo anymore. Baguette had her charms, but Kyungsoo also had her for two years already.
“We’re going to stargaze, hyung,” Jongin said softly.
Kyungsoo stopped and looked at him. Jongin bit on his lower lip, obviously trying to see if Kyungsoo liked the idea. And to be honest, Kyungsoo was… okay with that, he supposed. It’d be something new, and he didn’t mind doing anything with Jongin.
“Stargaze, huh?”
“Mm,” Jongin nodded, handing Kyungsoo a paper plate.
He took it, opening up the pizza box. It was pepperoni and cheese, his favourite. “It sounds a little gay but why not?” And he could’ve sworn that if Jongin had a tail, it’d be wagging like there was no tomorrow.
They spent the next half hour trying to avoid Baguette as she tried to get a piece of pizza out of them, holding their paper plates as high as possible. Kyungsoo kicked off his slippers and dug them into the soft cloth as they chatted about mundane stuff, settling nicely with the firmly shut pizza boxes set on the stool between himself and Jongin.
It felt really dumb to be sitting there right at his front lawn, pretending they were on some cute picnic when everything felt like it had been cut from different places and glued altogether sloppily, from the Bluetooth lamp and the front lawn. Cars kept turning into the street and washed them with headlights, ruining the vibe just as Kyungsoo would start to get used to it. But Jongin kept cracking stupid jokes that Kyungsoo couldn’t help laughing at while they ate, and he was considerate enough to remember to fling treats across the lawn for Baguette to chase after every once in a while.
Jongin’s such a nice, gorgeous hunk of meat, Kyungsoo thought a little sadly, chewing on the thick crust of his pizza slice.
“Aren’t you having fun?” Jongin asked, smiling far too victoriously for Kyungsoo’s taste. “Yeah, I am,” Kyungsoo nodded, pretending to glance over his shoulder to see how Baguette was doing. She was alright, of course, chewing and gnawing away on her new treat.
“Good. And if you’re thirsty, hyung, I have refreshments prepared too,” Jongin said.
“Oh. Well, I guess I don’t mind having a - ” Jongin reached a hand into the basket and brought out a bottle of wine.
“…Drink,” Kyungsoo finished lamely, “Why did you bring wine?” he frowned, mildly confused. Could this night get any more out of hand? Jongin placed it down, looking into the basket for something else.
“Because it’s a nice night, hyung. And you can drink, right?” he asked, pausing momentarily with his hand in the basket.
Kyungsoo rolled his eyes, swallowing the last of his pizza slice down his throat. “Yeah, sure. Kinda risky that you didn’t check with me first though. What if I’m a lightweight and I can’t hold my liquor well?” he asked, watching Jongin bring out a corkscrew and stab it into the cork of the wine bottle.
“Well,” he grunted as he twisted the corkscrew, “I’d still offer you a drink out of courtesy.”
Kyungsoo snorted, chuckling lightly. Of course you would, Kyungsoo thought. Jongin was thoughtful and polite that way; whoever Jongin would fall in love with someday would be the luckiest human being in the entire world. He was certain Jongin would be the best kind of boyfriend out there, judging from the way he was treating Kyungsoo right now.
This is him just being nice. I can’t even imagine him being romantic, Kyungsoo thought. He eyed Jongin carefully, watching him struggle with the wine bottle for a bit. Even in the dim light, he still looked pretty, far too good looking to be in close proximity to Kyungsoo. He didn’t think he’d ever find a word in the dictionary to describe the perfection that was Jongin.
Without any warning, he felt his emotions bubble up inside of him and for a horrifying moment, Kyungsoo could feel tears brimming in his eyes. He pretended to rub at them quickly, trying to get a hold of himself.
The wine bottle popped open beside Kyungsoo as he tried to wipe at his stupid eyes, and Jongin was soon smiling in triumph. “Got it. You wanna have the first taste, hyung?” Jongin asked. Kyungsoo blinked and looked up at Jongin, who quirked an eyebrow in question.
“S-Sure,” he stammered, fumbling around for the paper cups. He held it out and allowed Jongin to pour the red liquid into the cup halfway, and reached out with the second cup for Jongin. When they were done, Jongin took one of the cups carefully from Kyungsoo, smiling silently in thanks and they sipped at it tentatively. It tasted pretty good.
“This tastes more like grape vinegar than wine,” Kyungsoo remarked, swirling the wine in his paper cup.
It felt kind of cheap to be sipping wine out of something made of paper, but then again who was he trying to impress? (Obviously not Jongin.) The mugs in his house were no better anyway.
“Hm, it does, right? Baekhyun recommended it to me. He said it tasted good… Glad he wasn’t lying,” Jongin replied, and Kyungsoo laughed.
“You sound like you hang around a lot with friends,” Kyungsoo said, maybe a little enviously. After all, no one in high school really wanted to be friends with the ‘math genius’, and most of the people in his college was just like him; too shy, unwilling to say anything to another first. Yixing was the only exception, who didn’t seem to give a damn about how shy people might be and was friendly to just about everyone.
“I guess I do,” Jongin nodded, “don’t you?” he asked, lying halfway down on his back and leaning on his elbows to look up at Kyungsoo.
Kyungsoo blinked. “I… don’t, not really. If you hadn’t noticed, I’m home a lot and there’s rarely enough time to go out and socialize anyway,” he replied dryly, taking a sip at his wine.
Jongin’s gaze felt heavier from the way he was leaning on his arms, looking up at Kyungsoo with his warm, brown eyes. He couldn’t quite look at Jongin, especially when he was acting this way but fuck, Kyungsoo wanted more than anything else in that moment to be someone Jongin adored, because this one-sided crush he was nursing was starting to feel pretty shit.
Probably gonna need more wine if I’m going to get through this alive, Kyungsoo thought, downing the rest of the wine in one gulp.
“Whoa,” Jongin lifted an eyebrow playfully, “things are taking a serious turn now.” Kyungsoo kicked at Jongin’s calf lightly to shut him up, blushing just a little. Jongin had no idea what he was talking about, he wasn’t the one here with a big, fat crush on someone who only seemed attracted to dogs and not their owners.
“Just pour me some more wine, please,” Kyungsoo held out his cup. Baguette climbed gingerly and plopped herself down on Kyungsoo’s lap, nuzzling into his shirt. He caressed her fur gently as Jongin poured him a full cup of wine, almost full to the brim.
“So, back to the topic of friends,” Jongin continued, “don’t you have friends at your college? What about that guy who sent you home the other day?”
Kyungsoo waved a hand. “Yixing’s nice, but he’s friends with pretty much everybody. Hell, if he stopped by right now, you’d probably feel like he was your long lost best friend in less than ten minutes into a conversation.”
“So there’s no one else?” Jongin asked, as if he couldn’t quite believe it. Kyungsoo took a sip at his wine. This conversation was turning down a direction that Kyungsoo wasn’t sure if he felt completely comfortable talking about with Jongin. He probably could never fathom the idea of not having many friends; Jongin was, after all, friendly and really, really nice. (Evident from the good wine and even better company.) Kyungsoo couldn’t have been the only one to have noticed that.
“No one,” Kyungsoo shook his head in affirmation. Jongin looked like he couldn’t quite believe it, but he didn’t press on it.
“What about you though? If you have a ton of friends then I’m sure you’re bound to have someone interested in you, right?” Kyungsoo laughed to change the subject. It sounded more bitter than he’d like, but it was something that he wanted to know anyway.
Jongin tipped his head to one side. “I don’t think so. No one’s said anything anyway…” he trailed off. Kyungsoo thought he sounded somewhat uncertain, as if he wasn’t sure about his answer. I wouldn’t be surprised if someone he knew made their feelings obvious to him, Kyungsoo thought.
Someone prettier, friendlier, thinner, more open with Jongin than Kyungsoo ever could be. Someone that Jongin could like in return.
“I’m sure you’ll find someone,” Kyungsoo said. He pretended to sip at more wine, looking down into his cup. Jongin didn’t seem to notice, swallowing some wine down his throat as well.
They sat there for a few minutes without saying anything. Jongin looked a little lost in his thoughts, while Kyungsoo felt far too miserable for himself to say anything more. He didn’t know how he was supposed to keep up his act, pretending he felt nothing for Jongin when there he was, lying there casually and looking prettier than ever.
“Wait, hyung, I almost forgot,” Jongin abruptly snapped his head up.
“What?”
“We were supposed to stargaze,” Jongin smiled widely, setting his cup down on an even spot on the grass. “Oh, right,” Kyungsoo blinked in surprise. A little stargazing could do him good; maybe they could answer the universal question, why, oh why, is Kim Jongin so fine?
Jongin was already moving everything to one side, making space for the both of them in the middle of the cloth he’d laid out. Kyungsoo took one last swig of wine and drank it all up, placing the cup on top of the pizza boxes. He supposed he should’ve felt grateful towards Jongin for bringing wine tonight; a sober Kyungsoo wouldn’t do well, lying on the grass to stare at twinkly little things in the sky for no bloody reason.
Kyungsoo felt all the blood rushing up to his head as he laid down, adjusting himself to make sure he was well out of Jongin’s personal space. Not many stars were out tonight, but if he squinted a little bit, he could probably spot a few more.
Meanwhile, Jongin didn’t seem to share the same idea about personal space as Kyungsoo; he laid down right next to him, their shoulders and arms coming in contact with one another. Kyungsoo held his breath as Jongin shifted here and there beside him, their arms brushing far too many times for Kyungsoo’s liking. Did Jongin even realize the things he was doing to Kyungsoo’s dead, unbeating heart?
He was bringing it back to fucking life, that was what, and Kyungsoo didn’t even want to feel all these… feelings. In fact, he’d like it very much if he didn’t feel the warmth emanating from Jongin at all.
“Are you feeling dizzy, hyung?” Jongin asked, turning to look at him.
“Not nearly enough,” Kyungsoo gave him a tight smile. He laced his fingers together and placed them on his stomach, keeping them well within his own bubble of personal space.
“Well, let me know if you’re getting tired, hyung. I wouldn’t want to keep you up too late,” Jongin said softly. No, you wouldn’t, Kyungsoo thought. He wouldn’t, because Kyungsoo knew he was such a gentleman that way.
“Hm. So tell me what are we supposed to be looking at. Is that like, Scorpio or something?” Kyungsoo randomly pointed up at the sky on his left.
“No,” Jongin laughed, “I’m not entirely sure about that star, but I know this one,” Jongin said, pointing straight ahead.
“Oh?” Kyungsoo rubbed his eyes.
Alcohol always made him feel just a tiny bit sleepy. His heartrate, on the other hand, was picking up so loudly, he could hear it in his ears. Whether or not it was because of Jongin, he really couldn’t say.
“Yeah. Do you see this one right here, that one over there and another above it?” Jongin said, holding out both hands to point in opposite directions.
“No,” Kyungsoo said honestly. There were like twenty stars up in the sky, not including the tiny ones that Kyungsoo wasn’t sure if they were even considered stars. How the hell was he supposed to differentiate from this star to that star? And there was his astigmatism to consider…
Jongin paused for a moment, possibly sensing Kyungsoo’s dilemma, and went on: “Well, these three are called Altair, Vega and Deneb. And on July seventh - ”
“Chilseok, you mean?” Kyungsoo interrupted Jongin.
“Yup,” Jongin replied with a smile. “You know how the story goes, right? The one about the cow herder and weaver?”
Kyungsoo nodded.
“Well, they’re represented by Altair and Vega here, two out of the three stars that make up this summer triangle,” Jongin said, drawing an imaginary triangle outline in the sky.
Kyungsoo thought he could see the stars parting out of the way for Jongin’s fingers as he moved them from corner to corner.
“That’s cute. But there’re a few variations on the story… Which one is your favourite?” he asked Jongin, just to listen to the sound of his voice. Kyungsoo’s mother used to tell him bedtime stories, and the story behind the celebration of Chilseok festival was just one of them.
The story always started the same way; a cow herder and a weaver fell in love, only to be caught by the weaver’s father or in some versions, the Jade Emperor. Some versions even say that they were in love, but grew lazy in their marriage. Regardless, they were both torn apart, the cow herder thrown to the west side of the Milky Way, and the weaver on the east. However, they were permitted to meet once a year on the seventh of July, and so magpies would flock up to the sky and create a bridge for the star-crossed lovers, reuniting them for just one night.
It was all quite romantic and all, but Kyungsoo thought it was just a load of crap. And why was Jongin even talking about this?
“I think I like the version where they cry tears of joy each time they meet, and it falls as rain down onto Earth. It’s kinda sad and romantic, don’t you think?” Jongin asked.
Kyungsoo sniffled. “I think it just shows how much of a sap you are,” he replied, blushing. He didn’t want to talk about anything remotely romantic with Jongin; he was cutting it way too close with this topic, especially given his current state. Thank God it was dark at that moment and they’d been drinking; at least Kyungsoo could play his blush off as being slightly drunk.
“I dunno, hyung. I just find it so cool that people can be so in love, and it manifests into something more than an abstract concept. It becomes tears, the tears fall as rain, and in turn it becomes a legend…
“Don’t you think so, hyung?” Jongin asked abruptly.
Kyungsoo gave the only blasé response he could manage; a shrug. “I don’t know what love is, Jongin. I don’t think I’ve really experienced it so… I don’t know what to say.”
He thought it was a pretty good answer, until Jongin looked at him for a long moment, long enough that it made Kyungsoo a little self-conscious under his unblinking gaze.
Kyungsoo tried to snap at him, but all that came out was a nervous “W-what?”
Damn it all, the wine was starting to sink in. He felt ten times more anxious than usual all of a sudden.
A slow smile spread across Jongin’s lips, and he shook his head.
“I… It’s nothing.”
Kyungsoo decided not to press on it, but he couldn’t quite shake off the feeling of Jongin’s gaze burning holes into his face. It was unnerving, as if Jongin was looking right into Kyungsoo’s soul and seeing all of his secrets, unspoken crush included.
They laid there for a minute or two without saying anything to one another. Kyungsoo dug his toes into the cloth nervously, nerves getting the best of him. Is Jongin mad or something? he thought. He wasn’t saying anything, just looking up at the sky like it was the most interesting thing he’d ever seen.
But Kyungsoo didn’t really mean anything by that answer, and it was the truth nonetheless. He’d never wanted to pursue a relationship before Jongin came around.
And I probably just ruined what little chance I had with him, Kyungsoo thought, furrowing his eyebrows together. Good God, flirting was harder than Kyungsoo imagined. He sat up, a wave of dizziness washing over him and darkening his vision for a few seconds. Kyungsoo blinked it away and reached for more wine, pouring himself another cup.
“You want some more?” he asked Jongin out of habit, before biting on his tongue.
“Sure,” Jongin mumbled. Kyungsoo handed him his refilled cup when he heard Jongin sitting up. They drank a little, and seeing as they’d hardly done any stargazing, Kyungsoo flopped back down. Jongin looked at him in mild surprise, the edge of the cup grazing his bottom lip.
“You’re not bored, hyung?” he asked.
Kyungsoo shook his head. How could he be, when Jongin looked this beautiful, when he’d already had this much wine and when there were this many stars up in the sky? (He was royally fucked.)
So Jongin laid back down when he was done with the wine, and Kyungsoo listened.
-
It must’ve been a few drinks later when Jongin realized that Kyungsoo was leaning his head on his shoulder, giggling noiselessly with his eyes scrunched shut. He’d never seen Kyungsoo smile so widely in all the months he’d spent trying to make him smile, and he’d never wanted to kiss Kyungsoo so badly.
He’d been trying all those months to break down Kyungsoo’s walls, but if he knew that a little wine was all it took, Jongin would’ve done this a long time ago.
“You are so fuckin’ stupid,” Kyungsoo continued laughing, covering his face with his hand. Jongin couldn’t even remember what they were talking about anymore.
“I know,” Jongin chuckled, ruffling Kyungsoo’s hair even though he knew Kyungsoo hated it. Kyungsoo laughed some more and buried his face into Jongin’s shoulder; Jongin threaded his fingers through the dark strands of Kyungsoo’s hair maybe a little longer than he should have.
Kyungsoo slapped him away a few seconds later than normal, and Jongin took his hand away, looking down at Kyungsoo as he rolled to drape himself halfway over Jongin. His eyes were a little unfocused as he peered at Jongin with a serious expression on his face, abruptly sombre.
“I could beat the shit out of you, Jongin,” he said, rather clearly for someone who’d been drinking for the past hour or so. Jongin was extremely glad he’d thought to bring two wine bottles instead of just one.
“I know, hyung,” Jongin smiled fondly, and brushed his fingers across Kyungsoo’s cheek just because Kyungsoo looked young with his hair falling into his eyes.
Jongin wasn’t quite aware of what happened next, but a second later, Kyungsoo was heaving himself upwards, hands curling around Jongin’s neck. And stupidly enough, all Jongin managed to do in that split second was widen his eyes in fear of what Kyungsoo would do to him before he felt Kyungsoo’s lips brushing over his, feather light and gentle. It happened way too fast for Jongin, too fast for him to feel anything, and the next thing he knew, Kyungsoo was already moving off of him.
Jongin blinked. “Kyungsoo hyung, what - ”
“Watch Baguette for me,” Kyungsoo said tiredly, curling up into Jongin’s side and shutting his eyes.
“No, but wait, hyung,” Jongin sputtered in protest. Kyungsoo clearly didn’t give a fuck anymore; he placed his head on Jongin’s chest firmly and neither said nor did anything else.
Oh my God, Jongin thought. It was a dream come true, but this was a little more than he asked for. He couldn’t tell if he was supposed to do as Kyungsoo said, or just remain there and keep him warm.
Ohmygod ohmygod ohmygod, Jongin looked around in bewilderment.
“Baguette?” Jongin called as loud as he dared, turning as best as he could with Kyungsoo lying over him. Now that he thought about it, he hadn’t thought about Baguette ever since he brought out the wine and Kyungsoo would probably slice Jongin in the morning if Baguette went missing.
Luckily for him, her head popped up near Jongin’s right leg, her eyes only half open, and Jongin sighed thankfully in relief. Oh, thank God, he thought, dropping his head back down on the ground. Jongin patted Kyungsoo lightly, draping an arm over him. It had been one hell of a night.
And as if Kyungsoo knew Jongin was just thinking about the kiss and trying to relive the moment in his head, Kyungsoo muttered, “Shut up, Jongin,” under his breath. Jongin bit down on a smile.
-
There were birds chirping, and that was what jerked Kyungsoo awake because he’d never woken up to the sound of birds tweeting outside his window before. It was bright all around him, far too bright, and his pillow was a little larger than usual -
Kyungsoo gasped loudly when he looked down and found a sleeping Jongin instead of white, crumpled sheets. He scrambled backwards, putting distance between himself and Jongin, before he bumped into something. Kyungsoo turned, and gasped again in horror when he saw the wine bottle lying on its side, red liquid spilling out of it and onto the grass.
“Shit, shit,” Kyungsoo muttered, righting the bottle. His hands came away wet and smelling of grapes, and he groaned when he noticed the wine soaking into the one corner of the cloth.
“Ugh,” he grumbled, folding the wet corner hastily and rolling it away from the puddle of wine. It was already starting to seep into the grass anyway, so he deemed it as a lost cause and sat on his haunches, sighing at the mess he’d just made. He wasn’t even fully awake, for God’s sake. Kyungsoo was so not ready for this much shit just yet.
“Okay, so I’ll just wake Jongin up first,” he told himself, moving around gingerly. His head was throbbing a little, giving him a headache but it wasn’t too bad. Well, not yet anyway. But first, how did Jongin even end up sleeping on his lawn again?
Kyungsoo inched over to Jongin carefully, trying to recall whatever had happened the night before. There was pizza for dinner, treats for Baguette, dumb stories and myths about the constellations in the sky, a lot of laughing… Oh no, there was wine, Kyungsoo thought in dismay.
No wonder he slept so well throughout the night by Jongin’s side. He would never have crossed that line if he’d been fully sober or at least, only a little drunk.
“Jongin,” Kyungsoo poked Jongin’s side experimentally. Nothing.
“Jongin,” Kyungsoo tried again, a little louder this time. All he got was a sniff and a grunt out of the boy, who looked way too good despite the fact that he was sleeping.
He took a deep breath. “Jongin, wake up or I’m going to beat the living shit out of you till you do - ” Kyungsoo suddenly paused, hand in midair, about to land a hit right on Jongin’s chest.
Beat the living shit out of him… Now that was odd. Kyungsoo felt struck by a bout of déjà vu, and for some reason, he felt a little uneasy. Did he accidentally knock Jongin out cold last night? It couldn’t be though, because then Jongin would’ve been dead instead of sleeping on Kyungsoo’s lawn…
“Oh,” Kyungsoo realized, the horror of what he’d done hitting him full in the face. Oh no, Kyungsoo thought.
Good Lord, but Kyungsoo must’ve been the biggest idiot alive last night because how could I do that? He looked down at Jongin’s peaceful sleeping face, wondering what he’d think of Kyungsoo once he woke up. Jongin had to have been drunk last night too, that had to be the only reason why he was still here on Kyungsoo’s lawn.
“Oh my God, what do I do?” Kyungsoo said, panic rising in his chest. To wake Jongin or not? TO RISK A LIFETIME WORTH OF SHAME OR NOT?
And before Kyungsoo could even come to a decision, Baguette sprang out of nowhere behind Kyungsoo, barking at the top of her tiny voice at some people walking past the gates.
Kyungsoo had no choice but to shake Jongin violently awake, rousing out of his sleep just enough to hiss, “Wake up, we’re on my fucking front yard!” Jongin was of no help; all he did was groan and grunt on the ground at being shaken awake.
“Oy, are you uh, Kyungsoon?” a guy’s voice called out above Baguette’s incessant barking. Kyungsoo turned, even though that clearly wasn’t his name and spotted a tall, lanky guy waving at him at his front gate, a few other guys standing behind him. The tall guy looked like he could be around Kyungsoo’s age, sporting a snapback and dirty Chuck Taylors.
“Yeah?” Kyungsoo called back uncertainly.
“Is that Jongin?” he asked, pointing at Jongin down on the ground. Jongin made a noise in his throat at the sound of his name, stretching out on the cloth languidly. Some of the guy’s friends snickered at that and laughed among themselves.
“Um, yes,” Kyungsoo replied. Were they Jongin’s friends, here to collect him? In which case, Kyungsoo would gladly dump Jongin right over to them, because he didn’t really feel like facing him right at this moment -
“Oh, great! Kyungsoon, nice to meet you, I’m Chanyeol and this is Baekhyun, Jongdae, Luhan, Sehun…” he rattled off with names that Kyungsoo didn’t quite catch, and the next thing he knew, these guys were jumping over his front gate like Olympic athletes and hurrying over across the lawn. Baguette was just as surprised as Kyungsoo was, scampering around in amazement. She probably had never seen this many people in her entire life.
“Shit, Jongin wasn’t joking, Baguette’s really cute,” one of the guys gushed. He was one of the first few to jump over the gate, and he was wearing so much eyeliner Kyungsoo wondered if he had trouble seeing as he bent over to pick up Baguette.
The rest of the guys came over to Kyungsoo’s side, crowding around him and Jongin curiously, assessing him from head to toe.
“So you’re Kyungsoon,” one of them said, holding out a hand. His cheekbones were so sharp, Kyungsoo couldn’t quite believe he was real as they shook hands. “It’s Kyungsoo, actually,” Jongin corrected him from the ground.
“Kyungsoo,” they said in unison, looking at each other and nodding.
“Okay, wait, I’m sorry, what’s going on here again?” Kyungsoo said, looking down at Jongin.
“Oh, for fuck’s sake, Jongin, get up already,” Kyungsoo complained, tugging him up forcefully.
“Well, I think I can tell who’s the bottom in this relationship,” the cheekbones boy said, lifting an eyebrow suggestively. Kyungsoo already wanted to hit the guy, and it had been barely five minutes since he’d met him.
Jongin stood up, patting his pants clean. Kyungsoo removed his hand hurriedly, in case these guys interpreted it wrongly. Jongin seemed to be drunk still, because he looked around at the guys and said, “What are you guys doing here?”
Eyeliner boy spoke up: “Duh, to celebrate. You sealed the deal with him, right?”
Kyungsoo was immediately suspicious. “What deal?” he questioned Jongin.
“Uh - ”
“Spill it, tell us what happened last night,” one said in accented Korean. Kyungsoo thought he sounded like a native Chinese, but he couldn’t be too sure.
Jongin held his hands up. “Look, before I tell you guys anything, I think you’re coming on a little too strong on Kyungsoo here - ”
“Oh, he’s going to be spending a lot of time with us anyway from now on. Also, you’re making lunch right?” the tall one asked.
Kyungsoo looked at him and said plainly, “What?”
“I’m down for free food any time,” one of the taller guys shrugged his broad shoulders.
“There’s not many dog-friendly restaurants in the area anyway so lunch at Kyungsoo’s place actually sounds pretty great - ” Kyungsoo held up a hand before eyeliner boy could continue.
“I’m not making lunch for anyone till I figure all of this out,” he said threateningly.
“Figure what out?” bored-with-broad-shoulders asked, a trace of interest flickering over his expression.
“Yeah, figure what out? I thought Jongin had already clinched the deal, is this a joke or something - ”
“Hyung, do you mind if I have a word with you?” Jongin said pleadingly when he noticed Kyungsoo widening his eyes in horror. Jongin had the nerve to look sheepish as he wrapped a hand around Kyungsoo’s wrist and gently pulled him away from the group, near the tool shed where Jongin had puked on Kyungsoo’s feet the first time they met.
Jongin sighed, “Hyung, I’m sorry, these are my friends and - ”
“What are they doing on my yard?” Kyungsoo asked, glancing over at them. They seemed to be bickering over where to eat now, and eyeliner boy had passed Baguette over to the tall guy.
“I think they think I already, um. No, wait, they’re just here because they wanted me to go for lunch with them but I forgot,” Jongin said, wincing when the Chinese boy smacked eyeliner boy over the head.
“Okay, but what deal are they talking about, and how do they know my name? No, most importantly, how do they know where I live?” Kyungsoo asked, all the questions rushing out of his mouth faster than Jongin could answer him.
Jongin held up his hands. “They know your name because I’ve talked about you. But only to Chanyeol and Baekhyun, I swear, they must’ve told everyone in the dorm house last night - ”
Oh, Kyungsoo lifted an eyebrow. That explained it all; so these were the fuckboys who threw that crazy party the other night at the dorm house. Jongin seemed to notice the change in Kyungsoo’s expression and hurriedly said, “No, no, no, they’re not going to trash your house or something, I promise they won’t, hyung. I’ll get rid of them now if you want me to,” he added, sounding like he was on the verge of desperation.
That was a lovely idea, until the tall idiot waved at them with both hands and said, “Hey, we’re gonna go inside first, if that’s okay with y’all. Seems like you guys need a minute and I think we’ll just settle down till you guys are ready to come inside.”
With that, everyone made a beeline to Kyungsoo’s front door while bickering over who should carry Baguette, leaving Jongin and Kyungsoo in real peace. Kyungsoo wanted to protest, but since they were out of the way for now it seemed as good a time as anyway to talk to Jongin privately, while he had the chance.
“Okay, Jongin, I don’t - I’m not like, super mad at you or whatever but wait, I need to tell you something. Do you… remember what happened last night?” he asked slowly.
Jongin stopped. “Which part?” he asked in return.
Kyungsoo bit on his lip. Either way, he couldn’t see how he might get out of this with their friendship intact. But he didn’t want to risk Jongin remembering at some point later in the day or at a later time, possibly making everything awkward. No, he had to come clean now because he couldn’t live with this any longer.
He inhaled once, and blurted, “The part where I assaulted you.”
Jongin cocked his head to one side slowly. “Assaulted me…?”
“Yeah,” Kyungsoo nodded frantically. “Assaulted you. Attacked you. Took advantage of you. Jumped on you.” Jongin shook his head, frowning at Kyungsoo.
“Hyung, what are you saying?” he asked.
“Jesus, I fucking kissed you, Jongin!” Kyungsoo said angrily. “I don’t know what I was thinking, it must’ve been all the wine but it’s no excuse so I’m sorry, and I understand if you don’t want to talk to me anymore - ”
“Hyung,” Jongin said, his tone so serious that Kyungsoo stopped to look up at him. He grabbed Kyungsoo’s arm with a hand and said, “Hyung, slow down. I know you kissed me. And I was kinda upset that you didn’t give me any time to kiss you back.”
Now it was Kyungsoo’s turn to stare up at Jongin. “J-Jongin, don’t fuck with me, this isn’t funny.”
“I agree, it isn’t funny at all,” Jongin insisted, no hint of laughter in his eyes. This was possibly the first time Kyungsoo had seen him look so serious since that one time he thought he injured Baguette while playing a little too roughly with her.
“Jongin, do you - what are you saying right now?” Kyungsoo asked, voice cracking midsentence. He couldn’t wrap his head around what Jongin was saying because it couldn’t be what he thought he meant, Jongin was the brightest star in the sky while Kyungsoo was just one of those dots in the sky that you can’t make quite make it out to be a dim star or just an imaginary glimmer.
“Hyung, I… I like you. What do you think I was doing last night?” Jongin asked, looking a little hurt.
“I don’t know!” Kyungsoo wailed, “how the hell am I supposed to know?” He couldn’t believe his ears right now, and he kept looking around, expecting a whole team of cameramen to burst out onto the scene and reveal everything to be a great, big prank.
“Hyung, I was trying to confess to you last night. Then you - well y’know, and then you fell asleep before I ever found the right moment, but I thought you understood when I was telling you about Altair and Vega - ”
“I didn’t even know which star you were pointing at last night,” Kyungsoo grumbled, and Jongin would obviously have the bloody nerve to start laughing like it was some kind of joke.
“Hyung,” Jongin wheezed between chokes of laughter, “you really didn’t know?”
How was Kyungsoo supposed to know anything when it came to Jongin? All Jongin ever did to Kyungsoo was mess him up in ways that he never imagined possible and make him feel like an emotionally unstable teenage boy. Kyungsoo was too overwhelmed to even speak at that point, and turned to stomp away from Jongin.
But Jongin, being the terrible person he was, grabbed at Kyungsoo’s wrist as he tried to walk off. “Wait, hyung, d-don’t walk off,” Jongin stammered. Kyungsoo didn’t shake him off, just turned away with some unfathomable emotion lodging itself in his throat.
“Kyungsoo hyung, are you mad at me?” Jongin asked softly, and Kyungsoo’s heart melted just a little inside because Jongin only ever rarely called him by name. To hear it now, out of all occasions, was like injecting a shot of adrenaline right into Kyungsoo’s veins.
“No, I’m not mad. I just think I need time - ”
“So the kiss last night was a mistake?” Jongin asked, sounding disappointed.
“No, it wasn’t,” Kyungsoo retorted immediately, exasperated that Jongin would dare to think that that was a mistake. Well, it was in a way but Kyungsoo couldn’t honestly say he regretted kissing Jongin. As brief as it was, Kyungsoo couldn’t put the thought of Jongin’s petal soft lips out of his head.
“If it isn’t then why are you walking away?” Jongin asked now, eyebrows disappearing under his fringe.
“I’m walking away because we can’t just drop everything and get married,” Kyungsoo frowned as if he were talking to a child, “I’m walking away because maybe you need to think this further.”
Jongin pulled at him again. “I don’t think I need to think any more about this, hyung. I like you, hyung. I always have,” Jongin breathed, and Kyungsoo couldn’t believe how sincere he could sound when here they were, standing and looking ridiculous on the front lawn as usual.
“I like how you’re taciturn and snappy on most days but I know you care for people deep inside,” Jongin went on, “and I love your cooking, hyung. I always tell you that because I just… never had the balls to say what was really on my mind. So,” he shrugged, “if you don’t want to date me, or see me again, that’s… fine, I guess, but. I’d like to take you out, hyung. It’d mean the world if you’ll give me that chance with you.”
Kyungsoo didn’t know what to say. Jongin looked at him expectantly, fingers warm around Kyungsoo’s wrist. Kyungsoo didn’t have much experience dealing with his dreams coming true, and to hear Jongin say this all at once felt like he was asking for far too much.
“Put the boy out of his misery already, would you?” someone moaned at them loudly. Belatedly, Kyungsoo remembered Jongin’s friends and glanced around; some of them were leaning out of the kitchen window and staring at Kyungsoo and Jongin blatantly with varying levels of boredom. The cheekbones boy was the one who spoke, and now he had a hand placed at his forehead in mock distress.
“Just say yes or no, so we know if we need to plan to go out for lunch or stay here,” said the one with accented Korean. They didn’t look overly pleased about being kept waiting with no food.
Kyungsoo took a deep breath. “I’m - Jongin, I don’t know how to say this but I think we - us - ”
“Was that a yes?” Jongin asked excitedly.
“Y-yeah,” Kyungsoo nodded, heart rate accelerating once again. He couldn’t believe it, his mind couldn’t even process this but holy shit, Jongin wanted to ask him out and Kyungsoo was actually saying yes to his offer -
Jongin wrapped his arms around Kyungsoo in a tight bear hug, lifting him up into the air by an inch or two. Kyungsoo squawked indignantly and gripped Jongin frantically, head spinning from the sudden motion. “I’m sorry, hyung, I know you don’t like it when I touch you but I just had to,” Jongin said apologetically with his angelic smile on his face like he’d just won the lottery.
“I don’t hate it when you touch me,” Kyungsoo mumbled, feet touching the ground as Jongin placed him back down.
“Okay. So can I kiss you again, hyung?” Jongin asked eagerly.
“S-sure,” Kyungsoo blushed, disconcerted by the fact that he didn’t think that was inappropriate at all. In fact, all of this was going against the principles he usually lived by, but then again Jongin had never been one to conform to anything Kyungsoo thought he’d be.
So Jongin leaned forward first this time, and Kyungsoo’s hands were trembling when Jongin was less than an inch away, lips touching Kyungsoo’s mouth for a second.
This time felt like a real kiss, like Kyungsoo was lighting up in fireworks on the inside. He didn’t remember much from last night, but sober Kyungsoo could feel everything now, and he dug his shaking fingers into Jongin’s shirt as Jongin pressed a little harder to deepen the kiss. Kyungsoo felt his cheeks burn when Jongin placed his hands on his hips, thumbs rubbing circles on the edge of his ribcage.
A few seconds, eternities later, Jongin broke away. Kyungsoo was breathless, and he could feel the red in his cheeks. “Was that too much?” Jongin asked curiously.
Kyungsoo shook his head, swallowing thickly. It was anything but. Jongin smiled.
“Good,” he huffed, hands lingering on Kyungsoo’s waist. Kyungsoo didn’t know why Jongin kept treating him like a child when he was the older one between them, but it felt… oddly soothing. Like he was appreciated, and Jongin could see Kyungsoo for who he was.
That was when a smash came from inside the house, and Kyungsoo whipped his head around.
“What was that?”
“Must be Chanyeol,” eyeliner boy replied, sighing happily, “I love me a good happy ending, Jongdae. Don’t you?”
Jongdae and Luhan were already done with staring at the pair of them outside on the front lawn, and were already heading back inside to tell everyone the news. Jongin glanced at Kyungsoo and mistook his silence for anger, placing a hand on his back and murmuring low in his ear, “Hyung, don’t be mad at my friends. I’ll help you clean up the mess, yeah?”
Kyungsoo’s chest gave a funny clench as he looked up at Jongin. Fuck, it was too early, way too early to even read too much into this yet, but if this was what having a crush on Jongin felt like, then Kyungsoo couldn’t wait to be in love with him.