(no subject)
you know, i hate watching these movies where everything ends so perfectly. apart from being sickeningly sweet, it just makes me sad. it's kind of like the opposite of watching eastenders, which is so depressing, it'll make anyone happy about their life.
and i don't know why i write in this stupid thing. think about it.. putting private thoughts in a place where almost anyone can read it. i guess you can lock your entries, which i finally figured out how to do..but then why not write in a journal? mmm i don't know.
so i don't know what i feel anymore. a million things at once...there are times when my brain starts to kick in and say, 'what the are you rambling about?' but it doesn't seem to change anything. i wish it did.
sometimes i wonder whether it's good to be emotional. to feel everything, even when you really don't want to. i guess one can argue that you experience more of life that way..all that kind of 'better to have loved and lost' stuff. but i think sometimes it's nice just to be empty. a relief. i wish i could turn off my brain.
..
and i don't know why i write in this stupid thing. think about it.. putting private thoughts in a place where almost anyone can read it. i guess you can lock your entries, which i finally figured out how to do..but then why not write in a journal? mmm i don't know.
so i don't know what i feel anymore. a million things at once...there are times when my brain starts to kick in and say, 'what the are you rambling about?' but it doesn't seem to change anything. i wish it did.
sometimes i wonder whether it's good to be emotional. to feel everything, even when you really don't want to. i guess one can argue that you experience more of life that way..all that kind of 'better to have loved and lost' stuff. but i think sometimes it's nice just to be empty. a relief. i wish i could turn off my brain.
..