Pieces of Her, 19/?

May 30, 2011 10:30

Title: Pieces of Her, 19/?
Author: Kagekamay
Rating: R
Length: 3,092
Spoilers: AU after Special Education
Summary: Contrary to popular belief, Rachel Berry wasn't unbreakable. Now she's broken and the only person who can put her back together is Quinn Fabray. WARNING deals with self harm

"Quinn Fabray!"

The blonde flinched, her grip tightening on her cell phone as Rachel's shriek tore through her eardrums. She knew this had been a bad idea, but she was feeling a little desperate right now, "I'm sorry! I know this is asking a lot of you, but I really need someone to go with me."

"And did you stop and think for a second that maybe, just maybe I'd have a problem with this?"

Quinn hesitated, biting her lip. She had in fact considered the implications, but she hadn't expected the brunette to react so forcefully. Through the hysteria, Quinn could detect a small trace of fear.

"I know you and Santana don't exactly get along - "

"She hates me!"

Quinn sighed, running her free hand through her hair, "She doesn't hate you."

"She strongly dislikes me."

"Okay, that's a little more accurate," Quinn relented, pacing around her room, "but we really need to look for outfits for our song, and everyone else bailed on me."

"And you really need someone to come with you, even though I'm sure you have hung out with them alone plenty of times before?"

"Yes," Quinn said defensively, "Santana won't listen to what I have to say about the clothes she chooses. She'll just call me a prude and buy them anyway. If someone else is there with me to back me up, she might listen to reason."

It wasn't a complete lie. Santana could be stubborn when put in charge, and Quinn didn't want to end up fighting with her again if she could help it. What Quinn hadn't told Rachel, was that she was afraid to leave the diva on her own again. The blonde knew her dads were still hardly around, and she wanted Rachel to come so she could keep an eye on her.

"So your solution to this problem is to bring me along."

"Basically," Quinn replied, crossing her fingers and praying Rachel would buy it.

"I'm still a little hesitant, Quinn."

"She's not going to try anything if I'm there with you," the blonde argued, feeling her chance slipping away.

"Really? You can personally guarantee that?"

Quinn weighed her chances. If it was just her Rachel, and Santana, she might have said no, but the fact that Brittany would be there too made her odds seem a lot better.

"Yeah, I can," she said confidently.

Her declaration was followed by a silence that stretched on for a few seconds, before she heard a resigned sigh, "Very well. I'm trusting you to keep your promise."

Quinn nodded frantically, a smile breaking out on her face before she remembered that Rachel couldn't see her, "I will. I promise, Rach."

"And just to be clear, I'm only doing this so I can contribute to our group. I'd feel worse if I didn't help in some way."

"I understand," the blonde replied, sitting down on the side of her bed, "Thanks for doing this."

"Yes, well…I have to go. I'll see you tomorrow then."

"Alright, I'll pick you up at twelve."

Quinn tossed her phone on the bed beside her and lay down on her mattress. All things considered, that hadn't been as terrible as she thought it would be. Things had pretty much gone back to normal for the pair of them since the slushy incident, even if there was a hint of tension that hadn't been there before. It was barely there; only noticeable in the slight hesitation in Quinn's movements before she hugged Rachel, or the glint of trepidation in Rachel's eyes whenever Quinn would brush against her, but it was enough for Quinn to know things weren't what they seemed.

However, she was wary of pushing Rachel to talk about the kiss when it was pretty clear the diva wanted to forget it had ever happened. Sighing, the blonde rolled over and closed her eyes. Worrying about things wasn't going to make her get to sleep any faster, and the last thing she needed was for Rachel to yell at her because she was late picking her up.

-8-8-8-8-8-8-8-8-8-8-8-8-8-

"Are you sure they're coming?"

Quinn glanced over at Rachel, who was sitting next to her fiddling with the sleeves of her long t-shirt. She was trying to look nonchalant, but in reality she looked like she was going to throw up.

Quinn restrained herself from leaning over and giving her a reassuring pat on the arm and settled for shrugging, "Yeah, Santana said she'd meet us in the food court, so I'm sure she'll be here any minute."

Rachel nodded absentmindedly and her eyes resumed darting around the mall looking for any sign of the approaching Latina.

"Hey," Quinn called softly, causing Rachel to start and look at her, "Don't worry, okay? I'm not going to let her be a bitch to you, and neither will Brittany."

The brunette still looked unsure, and at that point Quinn decided she might as well. Not giving a damn about the possible implications, she reached over and grabbed Rachel's hand, giving it a reassuring squeeze before reluctantly letting go. The diva's lips quirked in a smile, and Quinn returned it almost immediately.

"Tubbers. Berry."

Quinn's mouth hardened into a thin line and she let out a small breath of frustration before turning in the direction of the voice. Standing feet from their table was Santana Lopez, pinkies linked as usual with Brittany, who waved at them.

"About time you showed up," the blonde grumbled, glancing sideways at Rachel to make sure she was okay.

Santana smirked, "I'm so sorry we kept your ass waiting an extra five minutes. Britt and I had some business we had to take care of."

"Yeah, well let's just get this over with," Quinn muttered, standing up and brushing past Santana with Rachel close by her side, already wondering if this had been a good idea.

-8-8-8-8-8-8-8-8-8-8-

"For the last time, we aren't wearing that when we're performing!"

"And why the fuck not? It's perfect!"

Rachel sighed and rubbed her temples as Quinn pushed away yet another pair of very short shorts that Santana was brandishing in her face.

"Because I said so!" Quinn yelled in frustration, glaring angrily at the hangar in Santana's hand, "Those can't even be classified as shorts!"

"Get the stick out of your ass, Fabray! These - " she shook the shorts for emphasis, " - will look smoking hot on me and halfway decent on you."

"Are they still arguing?" Brittany whispered, sitting down on the bench next to Rachel with a smoothie clutched in her hand.

"Yes," Rachel sighed, feeling the beginnings of a headache developing in the back of her skull, "Are they always like this when they're together?"

Brittany sipped pensively on her straw before answering, "No, but usually yeah."

They both watched as Quinn grabbed the shorts from Santana and stormed off to put them back.

"Deep down they care about each other. They just don't like to show it," Brittany said sagely, as Santana followed Quinn, shouting a string of abuse at her.

Rachel's brows knit together and she looked at Brittany strangely, "That's them caring about each other?"

Brittany giggled and shook her head, "No silly, that's just Santana being Santana."

With a final long pull on her straw to get the last bits of her smoothie, Brittany stood up and taking Rachel completely by surprise, grabbed her hand and hauled the diva to her feet.

"C'mon I saw the perfect pair of jeans over here," she called over her shoulder.

"Wait! What about Quinn and Santana?" Rachel asked.

"They'll stop arguing eventually," Brittany shrugged, letting go of Rachel's hand and starting to sift through the clothes until she found what she was looking for.

"Here!" she thrust a pair of black skinny jeans into Rachel's hands, "Try this on withhh," she looked around quickly and pulled a red tank top with a black outline of a rose and a black leather jacket off a rack, "these!"

"W-wait!" Rachel squeaked, as Brittany pulled her over to the dressing room, "I don't think this is a good idea!"

Brittany opened the door to a room and gently shoved the brunette inside, "You'll look awesome," she smiled as Rachel looked at her nervously, "trust me."

With that, she closed the door in the diva's face. Rachel stood rooted to the spot for a few seconds before she was able to shake off her surprise and start stripping. She couldn't believe she was doing this, but then again it was common knowledge that you couldn't say no to Brittany.

"Can I see?" the blonde called over the stall door, five minutes later.

"Just a second," Rachel called back, pulling on the leather jacket and examining herself in the mirror.

She adjusted the tank top one final time to make sure she looked presentable before stepping out of the room.

Brittany's eyes lit up and she held out a silver chain belt, "Put this on, and it'll look perfect."

Rachel took the belt and threaded it through the loops of the jeans. Once she was done, she stepped back and let Brittany examine her. The girl nodded appreciatively, "You look hot."

Rachel blushed and pulled self-consciously at the jacket, "I look okay, I guess."

"Nuh uh, you look way better than okay," Brittany insisted, letting her eyes roam Rachel's body from top to bottom, "Quinn will definitely agree."

"Wait! Brittany!" Rachel hissed, but the girl was already on the move, skipping around clothes racks over to where Quinn and Santana were still fighting.

She watched in horror, as Brittany gestured animatedly for the pair of them to follow her back to where she had left Rachel. After a couple of exchanged words and eyerolls, they followed Brittany to the dressing rooms, still casting each other dirty looks. The moment they saw Rachel, they stopped dead in their tracks.

Quinn's eyes widened slightly, and her cheeks started to redden while Santana smirked, "Not bad, Berry. You actually look pretty fine."

The brunette ducked her head down and mumbled a thank you, while Brittany bounced over to Santana, "Doesn't she, San? Do you think we can all wear something like this for the song?"

The corners of Santana's lips quirked into a smile, and her eyes softened as Brittany looked at her pleadingly, "Yeah sure, B. I think it'll work."

Brittany squealed in excitement and she hurriedly wrapped Santana up in a hug, "Thanks, S! I'm going to go find more tank tops!"

Santana watched her go before swinging around to Quinn without missing a beat, "When you're done staring at Berry's ass, come help me find some jeans for you and me."

Quinn blinked rapidly and snapped her head towards Santana, "I wasn't staring!"

"Uh huh, yeah," Santana smirked knowingly, before following after Brittany.

"I wasn't," Quinn defended, the moment she had gone.

Rachel bit her lip and nodded, more out of a way to avoid replying than anything else.

"I'll just go change back into my clothes," she said awkwardly, retreating back into her dressing room.

"Y-yeah, you do that," Quinn mumbled, putting a hand on the back of her neck and avoiding eye contact with Rachel.

Once Rachel was finished changing, she and Quinn met the other two Cheerios at the cash register to pay for the clothes. They ended up only buying tank tops for everyone since Quinn reminded them that they still had leather jackets left over from the Start Me Up/Livin' on a Prayer mash up.

"That actually wasn't a shitty afternoon," Santana admitted as they exited the mall, their bags clutched in their hands.

"Glad to hear it," Quinn said sarcastically, rolling her eyes behind the Latina's back.

The action didn't go unnoticed by Rachel, who had to stifle a giggle with her hand. Quinn still heard her though, and she smiled at the brunette. The four of them stopped at Quinn's car first since it was closer, and Quinn loaded all the bags into her trunk.

"Don't forget to bring that shit on Monday, Fabray," Santana warned, glaring at her friend, but even Rachel could tell she wasn't serious.

"Wouldn't dream of it," Quinn quipped, closing the trunk and going around to her side of the car.

Rachel was about to open her door, when she suddenly found herself being lifted in the air in a hug by Brittany. When she put her down, Rachel scrambled away from her, and looked fearfully over at Santana, fully expecting the Latina to rush towards her, fists blazing. Instead, Santana was standing in the same place, not looking exactly happy, but not looking like she wanted to kill Rachel either.

"What was that for?" Rachel asked warily, still shooting suspicious glances at Santana.

"For coming shopping with us, even though Santana has been mean to you," Brittany replied simply.

"Oh, you're welcome, Brittany," Rachel said uncertainly.

Brittany grinned and leaned down close to the diva's ear and whispered conspiratorially, "She's only mean when she's in school, because she thinks she has to be tough. Outside of it, she's more like a fluffy bunny."

"Alright, well B and I gotta go," Santana said sharply, effectively ending their conversation.

Brittany stepped away from Rachel and waved goodbye, once again linking pinkies with Santana, "Bye Rach, bye Quinn!"

-8-8-8-8-8-8-8-8-8-8-8-8-

"So was today okay?" Quinn asked nervously from Rachel's desk.

Rachel paused midway through taking off her sweatshirt and looked at Quinn contemplatively, "Actually yes."

The blonde let out the breath she had been holding, and relaxed into her chair, "Thanks again for coming with me. I don't know how I would have gotten through that without you."

"Mhm," Rachel said absentmindedly, throwing her sweatshirt on her bed and moving to lean on her desk beside Quinn.

"Can I ask you something?" she said, angling her body so that she was facing Quinn.

"Sure," Quinn agreed easily, eyebrows knit in concern, "what's up?"

Rachel chewed on her lip, unsure how to phrase her question, "It's about Santana.." she said slowly, watching Quinn closely to gage her reaction.

Quinn's eyes narrowed, but she nodded to indicate that Rachel should continue.

"Why was she…for lack of a better term…nice to me today?"

The blonde regarded her strangely, "I was actually wondering the same thing."

"And?" Rachel prompted, anxious to hear the girl's thoughts on the matter.

"Most of it was probably because Brittany was there," Quinn reasoned, "but I think a small part of it too was that we weren't in school."

Rachel frowned, "I don't understand."

"Well," Quinn said patiently, idly tracing patterns on the desk in front of her, "if we're not in school, Santana doesn't feel pressured to act like a bitch all the time to intimidate people. I think in her mind, she believes she can't afford to be nice to you, because people won't fear her."

"But why is it so important that people are afraid of her?" Rachel asked curiously.

Quinn gave her a pointed look, and suddenly Rachel felt as if she had been smacked in the face.

"Brittany?"

"Who else?" Quinn chuckled, "Almost everything Santana does leads back to protecting Brittany. Being a bitch to you was her way of ensuring Brittany never had to go through what you did."

Rachel was silent, taking in this new information.

"But that doesn't excuse her behavior," Quinn continued hastily, "I still want to smack her for the things she does to you."

Rachel shook her head, smiling a little at Quinn's words. She hesitantly put her hand on top of Quinn's, which was still on the desk, "I know you would, but I wouldn't want you to."

Quinn tensed in her chair, but Rachel's squeezed her hand gently, warning her to stay silent, "Santana may have tortured me since the beginning of high school, but something tells me she's hurting just as much as I am."

"And why do you say that?"

Rachel drew in a breath and seemed to think about how to answer, "Because she has everything and nothing at the same time."

And for the first time in her life, Quinn Fabray actually felt like she could relate to Santana Lopez.

faberry, pieces of her

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