For yamx - Top five Doctor lines and top five Jack lines (and two surprise bonuses)
This is going to be the lines that come to mind right now, off the top of my head, which means I might think of stuff I should've included later on, but... ah well.
Okay, again, making several categories because five is really not enough.
A - Top five Doctor lines that make me laugh
1) "See, that's the thing. I'm the Doctor, but beyond that, I just don't know. I literally do not know who I am. It's all untested. Am I funny? Am I sarcastic? Sexy? A right old misery? Life and soul? Right handed? Left handed? A gambler? A coward? A traitor? A liar? A nervous wreck? I mean, judging by the evidence, I've certainly got a gob! And how am I going to react when I see this? A great big threatening button! A Great Big Threatening Button Which Must Not Be Pressed Under Any Circumstances, am I right? Let me guess, it's some sort of control matrix. Hold on, what's feeding it? What have we got here? Blood? Yeah, definitely. Human blood. A positive, with just a dash of iron. But that means... Blood control. Blood control! Ooh! I haven't seen blood control for years! You're controlling all the A positives. Which leaves us with a great big stinking problem... 'cause I really don't know who I am. I don't know when to stop. So if I see a great big threatening button, which should never ever ever be pressed, then I just want to do this!" (Ten - The Christmas Invasion)
2) "What, you've never been bored? Never had a long night? Never had a lot of cabinets to put up?" (Nine - The Doctor Dances)
3) "Every planet has a north!" (Nine - Rose)
4) "No! Hold on, hold on, hold on, hold on, one more thing before dying. Do you know what happens if you hold two identical sonic devices against each other? [No.] Nor me! Let's find out!" (Ten - Partners in Crime)
5) "Mickey the idiot, I might just choke before I finish this sentence but... I need you." (Nine - World War III)
B - Top five Ninth Doctor serious (and meaningful) lines
1) "Do you know like we were saying? About the Earth revolving? It's like when you're a kid. The first time they tell you that the world's turning and you just can't quite believe it 'cause everything looks like it's standing still. I can feel it. The turn of the Earth. The ground beneath our feet is spinning at one thousand miles an hour, and the entire planet is hurtling around the sun at sixty-seven thousand miles an hour, and I can feel it. We're falling through space, you and me. Clinging to the skin of this tiny little world and if we le go... That's who I am. Now forget me, Rose Tyler. Go home." (Rose)
2) "You don't even know what it is. You'd just let me. [...] This is my life, Jackie. It's not fun, it's not smart. It's just standing up and making a decision, because nobody else will. [...] I could save the world but lose you." (World War III)
3) "You just want to drag the stars down and stick them underground underneath tonnes of sand and dirt, and label them. You're about as far from the stars as you can get! And you took her down with you. She was nineteen years old." (Dalek)
4) "I did it again. I picked another stupid ape. I should've known. It's not about showing you the universe, it never is. It's about the universe doing something for you." (Father's Day)
5) "Coward. Any day." (The Parting of the Ways)
C - Top five Tenth Doctor serious (and meaningful) lines
1) "Does it need saying?" (Journey's End)
2) "I don't age. I regenerate. But humans decay. You wither and you die. Imagine watching that happen to someone that you... [...] You can spend the rest of your life with me, but I can't spend the rest of mine with you. I have to live on. Alone. That's the curse of the Time Lords." (School Reunion)
3) "But then you're clever enough to use this whole system against me. If I destroy this planet then I destroy the gravity field. The rocket. The rocket loses protection, falls into the black hole. I'll have to sacrifice Rose. So that's the trap. Or the test or the final judgement, I don't know. If I kill you, I kill her. Except that implies, in this big grand scheme of gods and devils, that she's just a victim. But I've seen a lot of this universe. I've seen fake gods and bad gods and demi-gods and would-be gods, and out of all of that, out of that whole pantheon, if I believe in one thing, just one thing... I believe in her." (The Satan Pit)
4) "They leave. Because they should... or they find someone else. And some of them... some of them forget me. I suppose, in the end... they break my heart." (The Next Doctor)
5) "Don't you think I've done enough? History's back in place and everyone dies. [...] That's just it. Don't you see, Donna? Can't you understand? If I could go back and save them, then I would, but I can't! I can never go back, I can't, I just can't!" (The Fires of Pompeii)
C - Top five Jack lines (from Doctor Who - I don't know TW by heart so it's harder for me to include it)
1) "Who looks at a screwdriver and thinks, ooh-hoo, this could be a little more sonic!" (The Doctor Dances)
2) "I was much better off as a coward." (The Parting of the Ways)
3) "I can't tell you what I'm thinking right now." (Journey's End)
4) "I went back to her estate, in the nineteen eighties. Just once or twice. Watched her growing up. Never said hello. Timelines and all that." (Utopia)
5) "Just my luck! I climb through two miles of ventilation shafts, chasing life signs out of this thing, and who do I find? Mickey Mouse!" (Journey's End)
And because I can't stop, two bonus series:
D - Top five Jackie Tyler lines
1) "I'm in my dressing gown. [...] There's a strange man in my bedroom. [...] Well, anything could happen." (Rose)
2) "There was never anyone else." (Doomsday)
3) "What do you need? Tell me! Painkillers? D'you need aspirin? Codeine? Paracetamol? Pepto-Bismol? Liquid paraffin? Vitamin C? Vitamin D? Vitamin E? Is it food? Something simple. A bowl of soup! A nice bowl of soup! Soup and a sandwich? Soup and a little ham sandwich?" (The Christmas Invasion)
4) "You waltz in here, all charm and smiles, and the next thing I know, she vanishes off the face of the Earth! How old are you then? Forty? Forty-five? What, did you find her on the Internet? Go online and pretend you're a doctor? [...] Prove it! Stitch this, mate!" (Aliens of London)
5) "He's an alien. For all I know he eats grass and safety pins and things." (World War III)
E - Top five Donna Noble lines
1) "Donna, by the way, Donna Noble, since you didn't ask. I'll have a salute." (The Sontaran Stratagem)
2) "He is to skinny for words. You give him a hug, you get a papercut!" (The Sontaran Stratagem)
3) "You're not mating with me, sunshine! [...] I mean, you're just a long streak of nothing, you know, alien nothing!" (Partners in Crime)
4) "Oh my God! I don't believe it! You've even got the same suit! Don't you ever change?" (Partners in Crime)
5) "Oh, I'll make a scene, right in front of a tribunal, and the first thing I'm gonna say is wandering hands! [...] Sack one of this lot! Sack Cliff! He just sits there. I don't know what he does all day! Sorry, Cliff. Actually, I'm not sorry. What DO you do all day? [...] Who typed this? I'm your PA! Did you get someone else to type this? Beatrice! [...] Hole punch, having that. Stapler, mine. Toy cactus, you can have that, Beatrice, catch! Cliff, I'd leave you my mousemat, but I'm worried you'd cut yourself. [...] Oh, I'll show you vanishing. Thanks for nothing! Oh, and you know when that money went missing from the kitty? Anne Marie. That's all I'm saying. Anne Marie! [...] Oh, don't tell me. The hospital's back! Well, isn't that wizard?" (Turn Left)
Okay, again, making several categories because five is really not enough.
A - Top five Doctor lines that make me laugh
1) "See, that's the thing. I'm the Doctor, but beyond that, I just don't know. I literally do not know who I am. It's all untested. Am I funny? Am I sarcastic? Sexy? A right old misery? Life and soul? Right handed? Left handed? A gambler? A coward? A traitor? A liar? A nervous wreck? I mean, judging by the evidence, I've certainly got a gob! And how am I going to react when I see this? A great big threatening button! A Great Big Threatening Button Which Must Not Be Pressed Under Any Circumstances, am I right? Let me guess, it's some sort of control matrix. Hold on, what's feeding it? What have we got here? Blood? Yeah, definitely. Human blood. A positive, with just a dash of iron. But that means... Blood control. Blood control! Ooh! I haven't seen blood control for years! You're controlling all the A positives. Which leaves us with a great big stinking problem... 'cause I really don't know who I am. I don't know when to stop. So if I see a great big threatening button, which should never ever ever be pressed, then I just want to do this!" (Ten - The Christmas Invasion)
2) "What, you've never been bored? Never had a long night? Never had a lot of cabinets to put up?" (Nine - The Doctor Dances)
3) "Every planet has a north!" (Nine - Rose)
4) "No! Hold on, hold on, hold on, hold on, one more thing before dying. Do you know what happens if you hold two identical sonic devices against each other? [No.] Nor me! Let's find out!" (Ten - Partners in Crime)
5) "Mickey the idiot, I might just choke before I finish this sentence but... I need you." (Nine - World War III)
B - Top five Ninth Doctor serious (and meaningful) lines
1) "Do you know like we were saying? About the Earth revolving? It's like when you're a kid. The first time they tell you that the world's turning and you just can't quite believe it 'cause everything looks like it's standing still. I can feel it. The turn of the Earth. The ground beneath our feet is spinning at one thousand miles an hour, and the entire planet is hurtling around the sun at sixty-seven thousand miles an hour, and I can feel it. We're falling through space, you and me. Clinging to the skin of this tiny little world and if we le go... That's who I am. Now forget me, Rose Tyler. Go home." (Rose)
2) "You don't even know what it is. You'd just let me. [...] This is my life, Jackie. It's not fun, it's not smart. It's just standing up and making a decision, because nobody else will. [...] I could save the world but lose you." (World War III)
3) "You just want to drag the stars down and stick them underground underneath tonnes of sand and dirt, and label them. You're about as far from the stars as you can get! And you took her down with you. She was nineteen years old." (Dalek)
4) "I did it again. I picked another stupid ape. I should've known. It's not about showing you the universe, it never is. It's about the universe doing something for you." (Father's Day)
5) "Coward. Any day." (The Parting of the Ways)
C - Top five Tenth Doctor serious (and meaningful) lines
1) "Does it need saying?" (Journey's End)
2) "I don't age. I regenerate. But humans decay. You wither and you die. Imagine watching that happen to someone that you... [...] You can spend the rest of your life with me, but I can't spend the rest of mine with you. I have to live on. Alone. That's the curse of the Time Lords." (School Reunion)
3) "But then you're clever enough to use this whole system against me. If I destroy this planet then I destroy the gravity field. The rocket. The rocket loses protection, falls into the black hole. I'll have to sacrifice Rose. So that's the trap. Or the test or the final judgement, I don't know. If I kill you, I kill her. Except that implies, in this big grand scheme of gods and devils, that she's just a victim. But I've seen a lot of this universe. I've seen fake gods and bad gods and demi-gods and would-be gods, and out of all of that, out of that whole pantheon, if I believe in one thing, just one thing... I believe in her." (The Satan Pit)
4) "They leave. Because they should... or they find someone else. And some of them... some of them forget me. I suppose, in the end... they break my heart." (The Next Doctor)
5) "Don't you think I've done enough? History's back in place and everyone dies. [...] That's just it. Don't you see, Donna? Can't you understand? If I could go back and save them, then I would, but I can't! I can never go back, I can't, I just can't!" (The Fires of Pompeii)
C - Top five Jack lines (from Doctor Who - I don't know TW by heart so it's harder for me to include it)
1) "Who looks at a screwdriver and thinks, ooh-hoo, this could be a little more sonic!" (The Doctor Dances)
2) "I was much better off as a coward." (The Parting of the Ways)
3) "I can't tell you what I'm thinking right now." (Journey's End)
4) "I went back to her estate, in the nineteen eighties. Just once or twice. Watched her growing up. Never said hello. Timelines and all that." (Utopia)
5) "Just my luck! I climb through two miles of ventilation shafts, chasing life signs out of this thing, and who do I find? Mickey Mouse!" (Journey's End)
And because I can't stop, two bonus series:
D - Top five Jackie Tyler lines
1) "I'm in my dressing gown. [...] There's a strange man in my bedroom. [...] Well, anything could happen." (Rose)
2) "There was never anyone else." (Doomsday)
3) "What do you need? Tell me! Painkillers? D'you need aspirin? Codeine? Paracetamol? Pepto-Bismol? Liquid paraffin? Vitamin C? Vitamin D? Vitamin E? Is it food? Something simple. A bowl of soup! A nice bowl of soup! Soup and a sandwich? Soup and a little ham sandwich?" (The Christmas Invasion)
4) "You waltz in here, all charm and smiles, and the next thing I know, she vanishes off the face of the Earth! How old are you then? Forty? Forty-five? What, did you find her on the Internet? Go online and pretend you're a doctor? [...] Prove it! Stitch this, mate!" (Aliens of London)
5) "He's an alien. For all I know he eats grass and safety pins and things." (World War III)
E - Top five Donna Noble lines
1) "Donna, by the way, Donna Noble, since you didn't ask. I'll have a salute." (The Sontaran Stratagem)
2) "He is to skinny for words. You give him a hug, you get a papercut!" (The Sontaran Stratagem)
3) "You're not mating with me, sunshine! [...] I mean, you're just a long streak of nothing, you know, alien nothing!" (Partners in Crime)
4) "Oh my God! I don't believe it! You've even got the same suit! Don't you ever change?" (Partners in Crime)
5) "Oh, I'll make a scene, right in front of a tribunal, and the first thing I'm gonna say is wandering hands! [...] Sack one of this lot! Sack Cliff! He just sits there. I don't know what he does all day! Sorry, Cliff. Actually, I'm not sorry. What DO you do all day? [...] Who typed this? I'm your PA! Did you get someone else to type this? Beatrice! [...] Hole punch, having that. Stapler, mine. Toy cactus, you can have that, Beatrice, catch! Cliff, I'd leave you my mousemat, but I'm worried you'd cut yourself. [...] Oh, I'll show you vanishing. Thanks for nothing! Oh, and you know when that money went missing from the kitty? Anne Marie. That's all I'm saying. Anne Marie! [...] Oh, don't tell me. The hospital's back! Well, isn't that wizard?" (Turn Left)