(no subject)
So, I'm insane because things with Kitty are perfectly fine.
We had a long phone conversation a few days ago and I got to speak about a few of my worries and stuff. It went really well and so did my suggestion of going to her place for a little bit because she was unable to spend the night still.
I drove to her house without any problems, save for missing an exit. We looked at 4-chan stuff (the Bottom of the internet), ate a fried chicken dinner, and tried not to take a nap in her bedroom. Work ate us both alive, we were very tired from the insane Mother's day weekend.
She explained to me that one of the reasons that she hadn't come over as often as I wanted her to was because work drained her often. She's a lowly cashier too.
We didn't get to fool around much, even though I was dying for it. She was too afraid of her parents or sister walking in and other circumstances wouldn't allow it either. I playfully tried to undo her bra (god I suck at that!) and she flipped me! We wrestled around for a bit and it was funny because she looked at me and was like "You're so light! Usually I can't actually flip somebody like that."
I had a wonderful time, and it was just enough that I didn't feel so starved for affection and attention from her. I don't even mind that I'm working so much that I can't see her till Saturday. I also realised that I don't love her but I'm not just using her for sex either. We get along well, and I think she's beautiful and smart and interesting.
I even feel like I can behave myself at the next party ...maybe. Like not be so clingy or worry about not getting attention from her.
I even feel this renewed sense of hope for a girlfriend soon. I am not taken by any means. Kitty is there for a few things because no one else is, but that's all. I think I'm okay with that. Kinda sad though, I miss being in love.
We had a long phone conversation a few days ago and I got to speak about a few of my worries and stuff. It went really well and so did my suggestion of going to her place for a little bit because she was unable to spend the night still.
I drove to her house without any problems, save for missing an exit. We looked at 4-chan stuff (the Bottom of the internet), ate a fried chicken dinner, and tried not to take a nap in her bedroom. Work ate us both alive, we were very tired from the insane Mother's day weekend.
She explained to me that one of the reasons that she hadn't come over as often as I wanted her to was because work drained her often. She's a lowly cashier too.
We didn't get to fool around much, even though I was dying for it. She was too afraid of her parents or sister walking in and other circumstances wouldn't allow it either. I playfully tried to undo her bra (god I suck at that!) and she flipped me! We wrestled around for a bit and it was funny because she looked at me and was like "You're so light! Usually I can't actually flip somebody like that."
I had a wonderful time, and it was just enough that I didn't feel so starved for affection and attention from her. I don't even mind that I'm working so much that I can't see her till Saturday. I also realised that I don't love her but I'm not just using her for sex either. We get along well, and I think she's beautiful and smart and interesting.
I even feel like I can behave myself at the next party ...maybe. Like not be so clingy or worry about not getting attention from her.
I even feel this renewed sense of hope for a girlfriend soon. I am not taken by any means. Kitty is there for a few things because no one else is, but that's all. I think I'm okay with that. Kinda sad though, I miss being in love.