(no subject)
So I finally did it; wrote J/R/S porn with dominant!Remus and James’ POV too. But it turns out I can’t write PWP, and the actual sex doesn’t start until more than halfway through! Never mind. And Oh My God, there’s an actual plot! Sort-of.
And don't ever let me write porn again! I mean it! Also, I will post this on mpp_ot3, but where else should it go? Would I get away with remusxsirius? (probably not) Might have to join marauders_slash or pervy_werewolf, hee hee, oh poor me. This is dedicated to all the people who listened to me whinge about how bad I was at writing porn.
Title: My Beautiful Friend
Author: kabeyk
Pairing: James/Remus/Sirius
Rating: Maybe NC17, but definitely a hard R.
Word count: I try and write something short and it ends up at 7,500+. Sorry.
Disclaimer: Really not mine.
Summary: Things had been a bit weird for a while now, but when Sirius turns it into a competition James is forced to ask himself what he really wants…
My Beautiful Friend
There had been something… different lingering for a while, though it took some time for James to notice it, and even longer for anyone to mention it.
The first time it wasn’t really anything much at all, Sirius was rather tipsy and asked one of those silly questions that he was liable to ask just to force some sort of reaction.
‘If you had to shag one of us, who’d it be?’
James glared soundly at him and sighed.
‘Come on,’ Sirius insisted.
‘One of who?’
‘Me or Moony or Wormtail?’
‘Er… you?’
‘Really? Because I’m irresistible?’
There was a head-toss and some narcissistic preening to go with that comment, no doubt, so James focused his eyes on the patch of curtain over his friend’s shoulder. ‘No.’
‘Because you’re my best mate and at least we’d be together, you know, if we were ever forced to do that?’
There was a worrying amount of glee in Sirius’ voice as he said that. James wondered what sort of situation could possibly necessitate shagging one of your mates. ‘No.’
‘Well why then?’ Sirius had started to huff at him because he wasn’t playing the game right.
‘So you’d have to suffer right along with me.’
And James found himself tackled off the bed and onto the floor.
After all the yelling and kicking and punching, all the screams of ‘rape!’ and ‘oh, Padfoot, my darling!’ and ‘take me, Prongs!’. After Remus had woken up and started screaming at them that it was 3am and they might want to shut up before he killed them. After all that was over, James mostly forgot about it.
#
The second time was more serious, not the conversation really, more the situation they were in.
They’d been mostly trading insults, childish words helping to alleviate the tension, up until that point.
That time it’d been James who’d made the first comment, James who’d started the conversation, though he hadn’t meant to.
‘Well, those scars’ll go eventually, and at least it didn’t spoil his pretty face,’ he’d said. To James it was a silly throw-away sort of remark.
‘You think Moony’s pretty?’ Sirius asked, still fairly subdued, quiet to an extent James had only seen once before. But there was still a malicious hint in his voice, a warning note that his answer could be taken seriously, and even repeated back at a later date if he didn’t phrase it correctly, if his tone wasn’t quite right.
‘If he was a girl, I s’pose.’ James accompanied his words with a nonchalant shrug, and kept his eyes steady on Remus’ pale face as any change of stance would possibly be construed as suspicious.
‘So you’d shag him if he were a girl?’
‘Oh for fuck’s sake, Padfoot, I don’t know. Just trying to change the subject are you?’
Sirius had scowled back rather hard, face all screwed up, before he said, ‘would you do him if you were a girl?’
‘What the-‘ James favoured him with an exasperated look. ‘I don’t know. It’s the same thing, isn’t it?’
‘Not really.’
‘I suppose it isn’t. It’s hard to imagine Moony being a girl or being a girl myself, for some reason. Would you?’
‘He’s pretty enough,’ Sirius shrugged. James thought it was rather unfair of him to suggest that his own response wasn’t the important one, being that he was always the first to initiate these conversations.
‘And you aren’t pretty enough?’ James grinned, turning to wink at his mate. He was hoping to lighten things, but keeping the hint of anger and betrayal in his voice. Forgiveness was a given, but shouldn’t be assumed as such.
Sirius tossed his head, letting black locks swish round before falling in front of his eyes again. James hated that he did that; knew how attractive he was and abused it, let it infiltrate all his relationships, used it to influence anyone and everyone. ‘I think the fact that you can’t take your eyes off me proves that I am?’
James forced his voice calm and said ‘I prefer my men a bit more manly, my pretty little puppy,’ and he knew he’d scored there because ‘cute’ was one of Sirius’ most hated words.
‘Manly like Moony?’ Somewhere along the line James had lost the thread of what was going on. Luckily Remus woke at the sound of his own name and the discussion was temporarily over.
#
The next time it wasn’t even a conversation.
One evening, Remus staggered into the dormitory, breathless from running, and threw James’ cloak off, revealing himself to be all flushed and sweaty.
James tried not to laugh in triumph as he felt Sirius’ body go rigid next to him, heard the quill cease to scratch the parchment they were both working on.
‘Alright, Moony?’ James asked, proud of his steady tone.
‘Yeah, just Filch after me.’ Remus smoothed down his hair and dusted off his robes carefully.
‘Oh dear.’ James favoured him with his most sympathetic smile, though it may have turned out wrong, because he was feeling rather self-satisfied.
‘Erm, is something wrong? Do you two want to be alone?’ Remus asked them, and James couldn’t decipher the look in his eyes, both wary and… something else. He was starting to back nervously towards the door though.
‘Don’t be silly, Moony, we’re just sorting the map, why?’
‘Well, why are you both… looking at me funny?’
‘Oh don’t worry about that, Padfoot is just feeling a bit queer today,’ James said blithely, keeping his voice even and being careful not to let the emphasis rest anywhere in particular. He had to congratulate himself on that one; it was fucking brilliant.
‘Er, okay.’ Remus peered at them both as if they were rather mad. ‘I’ll just get my bag and leave you to it, shall I?’ He grabbed his school bag and edged cautiously from the room.
James grinned widely, especially satisfied that Sirius was now avoiding his eyes.
It was only afterwards that he realised that he must have been staring too.
#
The fourth time it was so blatant it was ridiculous.
Remus had got out of the bath, walked across the dormitory, shrugged his dressing gown off and started to change into his pyjamas, and James could feel that Sirius’ eyes were glued to Remus’ body. He found himself shocked at how obvious Sirius was being; the idiot may as well have unzipped his trousers and got on with it then and there.
For his part, Remus didn’t seem to have noticed, must have assumed that his room mates were just getting on with their homework, and he didn’t give away even the slightest sign that he’d noticed, or that he cared if anyone saw him naked or not.
James actually heard Sirius moan unhappily when Remus finally climbed under his duvet.
Fucking poof, James sneered to himself.
#
James was less happy about the fifth time, because he was well aware that he hadn’t had the upper hand in that conversation.
Remus had wandered out of their dormitory because he had to go and help Lizzy Smith (silly cow, thought James) with her Astronomy project, and Sirius had coolly turned to James and said ‘you do realise that you’re just as bad as me, don’t you?’
‘Oh fuck off, you’re as badly-behaved and evil as they come; I’m merely tortured and misunderstood.’ James smirked to himself; despite the fact that Sirius could clearly pull off tortured and misunderstood better than he could, at least he was the one with the quick and witty brain.
‘I meant about Remus.’
The reason James had messed this one up was because he’d genuinely not known what Sirius had been getting at until it was too late. ‘W-what about Remus?’
And then it was Sirius’ turn to be smug for once. ‘Come off it Prongs, you couldn’t have been more jealous of that Smith girl.’
‘I was not jealous!’
‘And you spend all day sneaking up to see him every five minutes when he’s ill at full moon.’
‘That doesn’t mean… it doesn’t mean anything! I’m just being a good friend, not anything more!’ And there he’d broken the golden rule -the rule that said they never mentioned any specifics, never admitted anything- without even noticing he’d done it.
‘Did I even mention anything more?’ Sirius asked innocently, but the gleam of victory twinkled clearly in his eyes.
James, being unprepared, had had no choice other than to gather up his things and storm down to the common room, cursing the fact that he’d been too caught up in his own witticisms to pay attention to the conversation’s suggestive undertones.
#
The next time was no-one’s fault, because they’d both got quite, quite drunk.
Sirius was always predisposed to speak things that should not be spoken, so again he’d started them off.
‘Do you ever think about him when you wank?’
James found he’d just frozen. ‘What?’
‘You think about Moony when you wank?’ Sirius asked, almost impatiently.
‘Do you?’
‘Mm. Sometimes.’
James was horrified. It was fair enough to share random fantasies with one another, but it was a little too specific for his liking to actually admit to what you wanked to. ‘I don’t really think about anything much,’ he replied and it was quite true, he was usually just thinking about how it felt. Whatever thoughts were going through his head were mainly irrelevant, and, irrelevant or not, they were none of Sirius’ business.
‘Yeah, like fuck!’
‘Piss off.’
‘So you do then?’ Sirius raised an eyebrow and, to James’ surprise, licked his lips.
‘Well what do you think about?’ James snapped.
‘Fucking him, obviously.’
‘You want to fuck him?’
‘Don’t you?’
James hadn’t really thought about it. There was a big difference between watching Remus a bit too often and wanting to put his cock inside him. ‘No.’ And the idea of it didn’t at all send a strange rush of some unidentifiable feeling flaming it’s way through his body.
‘You do.’
‘Don’t,’ James hissed back, struggling to keep his voice calm and trying not to wriggle.
‘You want to fuck me?’
‘No.’ Then he turned quickly because his best friend had just offered him sex in a serious tone of voice.
Sirius shrugged. ‘Be close enough, wouldn’t it?’
‘You’re sick,’ he spat.
‘No sicker than you.'
'Like hell am I as sick as--' James began to protest, but by then his best friend’s mouth had closed over his own. ‘Mm!’ he shoved Sirius hard. ‘Padfoot, fuck, you can’t just pretend I’m Moony!’
‘I s’pose not. Still, if you let me, I’ll let you…?’
‘Fuck off!’ James struggled to get up and locked himself in the bathroom, it being the only reasonable form of escape at that moment; at 3am and terribly drunk.
It turned out to be a very shrewd choice in the end, because he was throwing up not long after.
#
James decided there had been far too much of all of this, and that the best way to sort it was by finding out what Remus thought about it all. After all, he could hardly have his best mate jumping him every so often, every time he was sexually frustrated and wanted another boy to kiss, every time he wanted someone to pretend was Remus.
He didn’t really know how to start the conversation, so he went with ‘have you noticed Padfoot has been behaving a bit strangely recently?’
‘How could I not?’ Remus replied.
James sighed, not wanting to have to say the next bit, not knowing how to. What could he say? ‘Not his usual weird, different weird.’
‘I have noticed that I have to lock the bathroom door when I shower now, if that’s what you mean.’
James was utterly flabbergasted, not having at all suspected Remus of knowing. Remus had always acted completely oblivious. ‘Right…’ And what could he say to that? He could hardly ask Remus if he too had ever fancied being a screaming poofter, could he? ‘So… have you ever- have you ever thought about- about not locking the bathroom door?’
Remus watched him carefully, and James struggled to hold his gaze calmly. ‘Once or twice, yes.’
James didn’t really know why Remus’ confession had affected him so strongly, but it somehow made him rather angry. ‘So… will you?’
‘I don’t know; I’m feeling rather confused about all this myself.’
‘Right.’ James frowned, not knowing what to say.
‘Probably in the same way you are.’
‘Yeah-‘ Eventually James realised what he’d said. ‘I mean, I’m confused about Sirius’ behaviour, not, not like I’m a bender or anything.’
‘Oh. Right. Are you sure?’
James peered incredulously at his friend, shocked that someone as non-confrontational as Remus had dared to say that. ‘What?’
‘Well you’re acting as mad as him.’
‘But…’ James wanted to protest, but then Remus was saying the same thing Sirius had.
‘To be honest, I thought the two of you were…’ Remus trailed off hurriedly, a terrified expression stealing it’s way over his face as their eyes locked onto each others’. ‘I take it you aren’t then?’
‘No. No!’
‘Okay, sorry. Sorry. Just, you’ve been a bit secretive of late, haven’t you?’
‘Well we aren’t! No. Definitely not.’ James glared at Remus, who’d started to blush.
‘Okay, I get it! I’m sorry, okay!’ And with that Remus stormed out of the room. James thought it was hardly fair that Remus was the one who got to storm out, seeing as he’d been the one suggesting all those offensive things in the first place.
#
The next conversation was forced on James barely hours after.
‘What did you say to Moony?’ Sirius’ eyes were flashing blue murder, and his fingers starting to curl in that about-to-throw-a-punch kind of way.
‘Does it matter?’ James tried to edge away without actually appearing afraid.
‘It matters to me.’ Sirius had begun to scratch at his top lip with his bottom teeth in that fascinating way of his.
‘He thinks you and I are having an affair,’ James stated, as a way of detracting from the fact that it had been him who’d brought up the subject of Sirius’ bizarre sexuality with Remus.
‘…what?’
‘Seemed rather disappointed we weren’t actually.’
Sirius’ fingers replaced his teeth and pinched viciously at his lip, repeatedly tugging it away from his gums. James allowed himself to relax slightly, that particular gesture tended to be a portent of less violent actions, and more often than not signalled only that his friend was deep in thought. ‘So,’ Sirius said. ‘So.’
‘So what?’ James muttered impatiently.
‘He didn’t seem at all jealous?’
‘No. Are you seriously after him?’
‘Shut up James, I’m thinking.’
James pouted and refrained from making any joke about Sirius’ inability to have more than one thought in his head at any one time.
‘Why would he be disappointed?’ Sirius asked finally.
‘I’m not even sure he was! I don’t know; he doesn’t like being wrong.’
‘Yet… somehow that explanation doesn’t seem sufficient, does it?’ Sirius’ grin was fearsomely horrible, James thought, already starting to worry.
#
The next time he didn’t even get a chance to have a conversation, he’d been quietly hexing Sirius’ sock-drawer to do something wet and explody when touched, when he found himself thrown against the wall.
He knew immediately who it was, though it was a second before he understood what was really happening; that he wasn’t being attacked for his unwarranted sock-smiting, but was actually being kissed.
He kept his eyes screwed shut in the hope that he could pretend it was someone else, and kept his lips clamped together to stop any further unwanted intrusions. Unfortunately, he’d dropped his wand in shock at the surprise of it all, and having his arms pinned to the wall put him at a physical disadvantage too.
Eventually the lips were removed and he found himself able to breathe, but it seemed they’d moved only to hiss ‘come on, James.’
‘No,’ he grunted, still with lips tightly closed.
‘Please, please. Make this look good and I swear I’ll do anything you want. Anything!’
‘And what makes you think I want you to do ‘anything’ for me?’
‘Quick!’ and this time he’d left his mouth open so he had no chance.
He let his body go limp and simply gave himself over to whatever his friend wanted, the tongue swiping over and over inside his mouth. Oh fuck, oh fuck, oh fuck, he thought idly, having nothing else to do. Here’s me kissing Padfoot, the bastard. If he was honest about it, Sirius was a good kisser -he’d probably had a lot of practice, James thought bitterly- but there was no way he’d ever admit that aloud. After a while he found he actually had to concentrate on not kissing his friend back, kissing was clearly some sort of natural instinct and he had to actually consciously subdue the urge.
In an attempt at distracting himself, he decided that an even better idea would be to make it look really good and totally ham it up. Ah, payback, he thought blissfully, clutching his hands to Sirius’ buttocks whilst attempting to throttle him with his tongue. Though it was a little worrying that Sirius didn’t seem that disturbed by the latest development.
In fact, he was just kissing back even harder...
James began to panic quietly again, but his mental distress was suddenly interrupted by the door slamming.
He pulled away in horror, only to see that Sirius didn’t look horrified at all.
‘Si-‘
‘Oh no, did someone just walk in on us?’ Sirius’ eyes gleamed dangerously. ‘How embarrassing…’
‘You bastard!’ James hissed, ‘this is all to make Remus jealous?’ He swiped a sleeve across his mouth, but it was cold comfort when the inside of his mouth still tasted Sirius-y.
‘And what is wrong with that?’ Sirius preened a little and James wouldn’t have been surprised if he’d started to rub his hands together with evil glee too.
‘Well it won’t work, for starters.’
‘Don’t be such a pessimist; if he sees what a good time we two are having being delightfully homosexual, he’ll soon want to be a part of it.’
‘I severely doubt that. He probably just thinks we’re disgusting now.’
‘Nonsense, he’s probably well on the way to being madly and irrevocably in lust with me.’
‘Or me,’ James found he’d said before the more sensible parts of his brain had been engaged.
‘So it is like that then? Well. May the best man win!’ Sirius raised an eyebrow and hurried off to find Remus, presumably, while James was still cursing his own stupidity.
#
James knew he was good at plotting, having spent most of his school years involved in one evil scheme or another, but he was clearly very bad at plotting something like this. He’d never been able to persuade girls he liked to date him, so he couldn’t visualise it being any different just because it was a boy he wanted this time.
This was the sort of thing that Sirius was good at.
Admittedly, James hadn’t wanted to acknowledge that he wanted Remus, wanted another boy, but that didn’t matter now. Because now it was a competition, and he was buggered if he was going to let Sirius win. Or rather he would be buggered if-
James decided not to think about the details, because obviously he wasn’t interested in that sort of thing, oh no. All he needed to do was to make Remus like him better than Sirius, a competition that he knew they’d been secretly carrying on with for some time anyway.
And he did have an advantage over Sirius, because Sirius would go all out, ridiculously over the top, fawning and flashing and flirting and who knows what else.
James would be cool and mature about it. Indeed.
#
James crept into their dormitory on Sunday afternoon, knowing that Peter was off with his girlfriend and that Sirius was off somewhere else too, so he knew that now would be a perfect time to talk to Remus. Though he didn’t have a clue what he wanted to talk to Remus about or what he intended to achieve by talking to him. What was he trying to do here anyway? You are trying to piss off Sirius is what you are trying to do, he told himself, you have to focus.
Remus was sitting on his bed reading a book as James snuck in, though he didn’t even bother to look up, to James’ annoyance.
James was again struck by Remus’ looks. He really was quite disconcertingly pretty; his long dusty-brown hair hanging in his eyes, brushing gently against his freckled nose and cheeks, long freckled fingers deftly turning the pages, his teeth nipping at his lower lip.
I bet he bites his lip when he comes.
Where the fuck did that thought arrive from? James asked himself angrily; it isn’t like I’m some sort of poof. Of course he wasn’t; it was just Remus who was far too pretty, which wasn’t at all James’ fault, oh no. Stupid pretty Remus.
‘Remus?’ His voice shook slightly. For fuck’s sake James, he told himself, get it together; you aren’t some soppy schoolgirl with a crush.
‘Oh. Hey, James.’ Remus’ voice was rather guarded, he was clearly still annoyed about yesterday.
James took a deep breath and sat down next to Remus on the bed. ‘Sirius and I aren’t having an affair you know.’
Remus flushed. ‘Of course you aren’t, that’s why I didn’t walk in on the two of you snogging yesterday.’
‘Er. About that.’
‘Yes?’ Remus finally looked up from his book and stared straight into James’ eyes, which didn’t at all help.
‘Look. I’d told him what you’d thought and he-‘
‘So you were playing a trick on me?’
That was exactly what James had been about to suggest, but Remus looked so angry, that he couldn’t bring himself to agree. ‘Not, not exactly. Well, I told him and he thought it’d be funny to try it out.’
‘Really?’
‘Yeah. Er, he has tried to kiss me before,’ James found himself confessing in some desperate attempt to placate Remus’ anger.
Remus’ eyebrows went up. ‘Really?’
‘Yeah, when he’s drunk and stuff. So it wasn’t a big deal or anything. I just thought I’d humour him for once. I mean, it doesn’t mean anything or anything-‘
‘Because you’re totally straight.’
‘Er. Yeah, yeah.’
‘Okay. So you were just kissing him for a laugh.’
‘Well, yeah, er no. Er. Well it’s quite natural to kiss someone back when they kiss you and I wasn’t really paying attention and he is very good at kissing-‘
‘Is he?’
James ignored the flash of jealousy he felt at Remus’ question. ‘Er. Yeah.’
‘So you enjoyed it.’
James panicked a little. ‘Well, no, because I’m-‘
‘Completely straight, yes of course.’
‘-but it was okay, and stuff,’ he shrugged.
‘So you’d do it again then?’
‘No! Well, maybe. No. Does it matter?’ Suddenly he was slap bang in the middle of yet another senseless conversation, not having a clue what was the right or wrong answer to any of Remus’ questions, and scared to look at Remus in case Remus could see the truth in his eyes.
‘I don’t want you to have any regrets, James,’ Remus sighed.
‘It wasn’t that bad.’
‘No, I mean, if you did like him, but you were afraid of admitting that you were gay-‘
‘I’m not! I’m not gay or anything, I’m just-‘ James stopped suddenly, realising what he’d said.
‘Just what?’
‘Nothing! I’m straight!’ he protested.
‘I wouldn’t mind, and I’m sure Peter wouldn’t either, if you and Sirius wanted to-‘ Remus’ voice was gently and comforting, the sort of voice that encouraged confidences.
‘No! Look, if I was going to be, be some sort of bender, then I wouldn’t like Sirius-‘
‘Why ever not? It would make sense; he is your best friend.’
Remus was asking a lot of very stupid questions, James decided. ‘That doesn’t mean I fancy him! He’s all- I prefer- Just no. No.’
‘He is very good looking.’
‘Remus; he’s just not my type, okay?’
‘Okay,’ Remus muttered, almost sulkily.
‘Good.’
‘So who is your type?’
‘No-one!’ James yelped a bit too loudly.
Remus gave him an odd look. ‘So you like no-one?’
‘No boys! I don’t like any boys.’
‘I see.’ Remus was watching him and frowning, as if trying to work something out. ‘Oh.’
‘Oh what?’
‘This.’ Remus reached a hand up and carefully smoothed a strand of hair out of James’ eyes.
James trembled as Remus’ fingers stayed pressed to his face, smoothing their way over the arm of his glasses and down his cheek bone. He didn’t know what to do, somehow he’d given himself away, and somehow Remus didn’t mind and was actually…
Remus was leaning in, and James was thinking of course I’m going to pull away, or even punch him in the face, like I nearly did with Sirius. Oh, yes, any minute now. I’m going to shove him over and-
And then Remus’ lips were against his, and well, a quick kiss was hardly going to matter all that much, was it? It was only a kiss, after all. Just Remus’ lips touching his own…
And then Remus had opened his mouth and was pressing his hot wet tongue between James’ lips, and James hadn’t even realised that his own mouth had opened to let him. Remus’ tongue slid against his and he couldn’t help but love it, Remus tasted so nice and his skin smelt so sweet, and before he knew it he’d buried his fingers in warm brown hair and was kissing back in earnest.
And it wasn’t that much of a problem, after all, Remus was pretty like girls were pretty, so it wasn’t his fault if he was finding this all a bit confusing. James pulled away a little, just so he could peer into those soft brown eyes, his gaze flickering over pale, feminine, freckled skin, before tilting his head sideways and leaning closer for a deeper kiss. No big deal, Remus was simply very good at kissing, and so soft like a girl, and-
They were rudely interrupted by the door banging open violently, hinges screaming in protest.
James paled as he twitched reluctantly away from Remus. ‘Ah.’
Sirius threw himself at his best friend, and seconds later he was sitting on James’ stomach while trying to strangle him and/or scratch his eyes out. Trust that flaming poof to fight like a girl, James thought, refusing to acknowledge the fact that he himself had, up until a minute ago, been kissing a member of his own sex.
‘Remus, are you going to help me, or are you going to just sit there?’ he yelled indistinctly, muffled by Sirius’ arm.
With great effort, James managed wrestle Sirius off a bit and turn his head to the side, but Remus was just sitting and gawping at them.
‘Remus!’ he shouted.
‘See, even Moony thinks you deserve a good beating, you bastard,’ Sirius hissed, pummelling at James’ torso.
Then James realised what had been really going on. ‘Fuck, Moony…’
Remus made a strange squeaky noise.
‘Padfoot, get off me. Padfoot!’ James yelled urgently.
‘Why should I?’
‘Just-‘
James managed to scramble out from under his best friend in the confusion, and then they were all just sitting on the bed awkwardly, Remus blushing profusely.
‘What?’ Sirius asked impatiently.
‘Look, Remus, we really aren’t having an affair you know,’ James told him.
‘O-kay.’
‘I don’t get it,’ Sirius muttered sulkily.
‘Sorry,’ mumbled Remus, blushing some more.
‘S’okay,’ James told him.
‘No, really, I’m sorry, I-‘ He tried to climb off the bed, but James grabbed his arm and stopped him.
‘How about we just talk about this.’
‘Talk about what?’ asked Sirius fiercely.
‘I don’t know, just this.’
‘Well you won,’ snapped Sirius. ‘You bastard,’ he added.
‘This was some sort of competition?’ Remus asked in horror, trying to get up again.
‘No. No, it was- well it was sort of a competition, but not the way you think.’
‘But you won because I kissed you?’ Remus snarled at him.
‘Well, I suppose…’
‘And what did you win?’ Remus’ voice had gone all horrible and nasty and bitter, and James didn’t know what to do about it.
‘I, well, I suppose the prize was… getting to kiss you.’ James found he was blushing himself.
Remus looked astonished at that, while Sirius was still sulking. James was utterly confused; he wanted to kiss Remus again, most definitely, but he’d actually upset his best friend and he hadn’t really wanted that to happen.
‘So what… what now?’ Remus asked, suddenly all quiet and shy again.
And James knew he had to sacrifice what he wanted for Sirius’ sake. He took a deep breath and smiled wickedly, though it killed him. ‘Why don’t we see if I get as excited watching you two as Remus does watching Sirius and I?’
His two friends just stared back.
‘…Remus?’ Sirius asked carefully after a while. James could see his friend was very nervous now, twitchy with anticipation, eyes flickering around the enclosed canopy of the bed.
Remus frowned thoughtfully at James, before carefully saying, ‘I suppose.’
One second Sirius was sitting calmly, the next he’d thrown himself at Remus, and Remus gasped loudly as he was crushed to the mattress by Sirius’ eager body. James thought that Sirius’ kissing technique appeared rather more dubious from the angle of an observer, very sloppy indeed. Sirius was very intent on his task, holding tight to Remus’ jaw, fingers occasionally curling to stroke his skin, legs either side of Remus’ to keep him in place.
James couldn’t see that there was anything erotic about this, just watching people kiss. The only thing he really felt was the slight jealousy, that he wanted to be the one who got to kiss Remus. He knew that he should stop this now, just get up and leave them to get on with it, but he couldn’t quite make himself, being that he was so jealous. He knew that Sirius should get to keep Remus; beautiful, edible, sweet-tasting Remus, but it still wasn’t fair. Wasn’t fair that he only got one brief, unsatisfying, addictive kiss, when Sirius would probably get so much more.
He was just steeling himself to finally make his move when he realised that Remus was watching him.
Sirius had begun to suck and bite on Remus’ smooth, delicate white neck, also unbuttoning Remus’ shirt to reveal a tantalizing strip of his pale, freckled chest. This was all too much for James, his resolve already terribly weak, the thought of getting to see Remus almost naked was far too enticing. Especially as Remus was watching him while all this happened. Remus didn’t want him to leave.
His eyes were locked onto Remus’, watching his friend’s face change with each touch Sirius made, seeing each flutter of pleasure pass over his features. Okay, so maybe this was just a bit erotic. Then, as Sirius’ lips clamped down over a nipple, Remus smiled; a lazy, wicked smile, a satisfied smile, and James felt the lust flow through him too, suddenly excited because this was what Remus really wanted. Both of them. At once.
Then in one quick movement everything changed. Remus jerked his body unexpectedly and then their positions were inverted, Sirius was the one pinned helplessly to the bed, Remus crouched triumphantly over him. James actually yelped with laughter at the look of horrified shock on Sirius’ face; he doubted very much that Sirius was ever anything but on top.
And then his laughter froze in his throat because Remus then started on Sirius, holding him down, eagerly kissing first his lips then working his way down the rest of his body, mouth sliding unhurriedly, but pausing occasionally to sink his teeth in. After a surprisingly short amount of time Sirius went still, then even more surprisingly did nothing else save the making the occasional moan as Remus calmly conquered him.
And James had never seen anything hotter in his entire life; his beautiful and usually docile friend so dominant, so perfect and confident and in control. And he was indeed far rougher than Sirius had been with him, twisting Sirius around so he could trail his lips to whichever body part he fancied, jerking clothes aside fiercely and biting hard into Sirius’ flesh.
Sirius took it all perfectly calmly, submissively, moving only to gently stoke Remus’ skin in the most placid of ways. James watched his best friend’s hand as it slid under Remus’ open shirt, exposing a narrow hip-bone, as Remus kissed his way back up to Sirius’ lips.
James’ own breathing was fast now, ridiculously so, and he was harder than he could ever remember having been before, wanting nothing more than to be able to open his trousers and- Actually there were a couple of things he wanted more than that but he was trying not to think about them, difficult though it was. But he told himself it wouldn’t be too terrible of him if he just touched Remus a little, just the hot, freckled skin on his hip, maybe smooth his hand across Remus’ back, just for a second.
His fingertips had made contact before he’d even finished the thought, Remus’ skin so soft, the thin layer of hair making it feel like fresh velvet. Not wanting to stop, he then dragged his hand back and round until he was touching the skin at the side of Remus’ belly, pressed as it was against Sirius’. Remus moaned and wriggled a little, hips thrusting slightly against Sirius’, and James wondered if he was hard too, hard like James was, and the thought of Remus’ cock, stiff and desperate, was only making him harder himself.
James worked his hand in further between them, curling his fingers into the almost non-existent gap, and edged his whole body a little closer to the pair of them, now able to feel Sirius’ skin too. He couldn’t possibly stay here much longer, but he could also feel that tempting line of hair leading down from Remus’ belly button, and he wanted so desperately to be able to look at Remus, look at all of him, run his hands over all of his skin…
His two friends continued to kiss hungrily and loudly, lips and tongues smacking together, and James didn’t think this was fair at all, to be stuck merely watching. He reached his other hand up and let it cup Sirius’ cheek with it’s sharp, elegant cheekbone, and slid his thumb in to touch where their lips met. The digit was quickly enveloped by their mouths and he gasped as he felt hot tongues swirling around it.
James gave in, only for a second he told himself, and lay down next to them; there was no way he could leave right now, his left hand resting between two warm bellies, his right thumb being thoroughly snogged. He desperately resisted the urge to push his hips forward, to rub himself against the side of his best friend, but he did nuzzle his face in close to Sirius’ neck, nose resting under his jaw and against the heel of his own hand. The frame of his glasses was digging in a bit, but he wouldn’t be relinquishing them any time soon, not when the view was so beautiful.
He was just debating whether he could manage to extract one of his hands for more urgent purposes when teeth clamped around his thumb and his hand was pulled away, yanking his arm up. Remus had sat up slightly and was watching him with wide, lustful eyes, his shirt now hanging off one narrow, white shoulder and his trousers slung low on his hips. His cheeks were heavily flushed, his hair tumbling into his eyes and his cock was clearly very erect.
James decided he wasn’t leaving ever, not with Remus looking like this, looking at him like this. The teeth gently let go of his thumb, but Remus’ lips stayed there and he sucked hard, never taking his eyes off James’, his alluring pink lips wrapped around as if he were sucking him off.
James whimpered, his lips twitching with need, and he could tell that Sirius was undoubtedly staring at Remus with the same dazed expression he was.
Remus, meanwhile, released the thumb and licked James’ palm, which caused another pathetic whimper to escape James’ lips. He cursed himself for being so feeble, but surely no-one could have any presence of mind when in such a situation as this, watching Remus beautifully licking and biting at his fingers, wondering how fingers calloused from hours spent on a broomstick could still be so sensitive.
All too soon Remus released James’ hand, but before he could even think about complaining Remus had edged closer and begun unbuttoning his shirt for him. James watched Remus closely, watched his fingers and the way he licked his lips slowly. James felt Remus’ hands smooth their way down his back as his shirt was removed and he sighed with pleasure.
‘Ohhhh,’ Sirius whined, clearly feeling left out. Selfish bugger, thought James.
‘Aw, what’s wrong?’ Remus whispered, his voice all hoarse and lustful, leaning down over Sirius, his hands either side of his head.
Sirius was pouting childishly, his eyes begging for something.
James lay next to Sirius and watched them both carefully; he knew what would have to happen next, but he didn’t bother to be nervous because he was far too desperate and frustrated.
Remus simply smiled, gently biting his own lip -causing James to arch himself into Sirius’ hip with pure want- and slid his hand down the front of Sirius’ trousers. Sirius moaned and thrust upwards, and James could do nothing but watch jealously as Remus pushed himself against Sirius’ thigh and stroked his cock slowly but firmly, a look of deep concentration on his face.
‘Oh, fuck, this is better than I imagined,’ Sirius groaned happily, and James was surprised to find he was enjoying the intense look on his best friend’s face.
‘You’ve been imagining this?’ Remus asked, eyes gleaming, watching Sirius carefully.
‘Yes, oh yes, all the time…’
Remus’ eyes flickered to James. ‘You all jealous, Prongs?’
‘No,’ he lied.
‘Don’t worry, you’ll get a go.’
James experienced a quick flash of annoyance at the patronising comment; who had put Remus in charge of all this anyway? Remus, who had been blushing at the mere thought of it earlier. Though he had to admit to himself that this was exactly what both he and Sirius had been secretly wanting for ages. They both wanted Remus, and that clearly put him in charge.
‘In fact, you could have a go now if you wanted,’ Remus continued.
James shot Remus a puzzled expression, but before he could decipher Remus’ new even more predatory grin, his left hand had been grasped and pushed down Sirius’ trousers in place of Remus’.
‘There we go,’ Remus sighed contentedly, and James knew that this was what Remus had wanted all along.
Remus quickly undid Sirius’ trousers for him and pulled his underwear down, as James continued to stroke Sirius’ cock. It wasn’t actually all that strange really, excessively aroused as he was he probably would have done anything, though he would have rather been stroking himself like that. However, stroking someone else like that was pretty erotic too and he began to thrust in earnest against Sirius’ right thigh, needing something to stop the ache.
‘Moony!’ James gasped as Remus settled down on Sirius’ other side to watch.
‘What?’
‘At least take some more clothes off!’
Remus grinned again and sat up to peel off his shirt and pull down his own trousers, and both James and Sirius stared openly at his body. James groaned deeply, wishing he could just throw himself at Remus, tackle him to the bed and take him right there. Remus was fairly bony, but in a carefully muscled way, his arms clearly stronger than they looked and even his chest was tightly toned. Remus blushed as they both watched him, which somehow made him even more beguiling; his features delicate and beautiful, eyes glazed with lust.
‘More,’ James gasped, propping himself up on an elbow, and rubbing Sirius faster in his own excitement.
Remus moaned and slid his pants down, a hand quickly moving to clasp his own cock. James whined frantically in Sirius’ ear, driving his crotch harder against his friend, wanting so badly to touch Remus, so caught up in the idea of it, that he almost missed it as Sirius cried out and suddenly his hand was very hot and wet, Sirius groaning and continuing to thrust until it was completely over.
Remus snatched James’ hand almost immediately and ran his tongue over his sticky fingers. James was quite shocked, but couldn’t help but enjoy it as Remus’ kissed and bit at his fingers again, shuddering as his skin prickled with goosebumps.
Sirius was still gasping, reaching for Remus, clearly wanting a kiss, but Remus just smiled and lowered his mouth to Sirius’ stomach, licking him clean. Sirius quickly pulled their mouths together, which James thought was a bit disgusting all things considered, and they kissed keenly, Remus clearly very aroused indeed. James ran his fingers over Remus’ back, not wanting to be left out again, watching how Remus’ body moved and sliding his hands all over, over his narrow hips, taut arse and firm thighs. James knew that this shouldn’t arouse him, that he should be wanting curved, soft, female limbs instead of hard male ones. But Remus was so stunning, so perfect and touchable. James pushed his lips into the small of Remus’ back, sighing with pleasure and nuzzling into the soft hairs there, before sliding his lips down and kissing the curve of his arse and down to his thighs.
Sirius’ hands were all over Remus however, touching and grabbing as they kissed each other, and James was continually forced to fight to get his own touches in.
‘Moony, anything, I’ll do anything,’ Sirius gasped around their mouths as James tried sinking his teeth into Remus’ beautiful bottom.
‘Uh…’ Remus twitched slightly, ‘really?’
‘Yes, please, anything.’
Remus turned to give James one of those sly looks again. ‘Suck James off,’ he said as he turned back.
James was horrified, though Sirius made no objection.
‘You want it don’t you?’ Remus asked him, which James thought was so unfair because at that moment he would have done anything to please Remus. ‘On your back then.’
Sirius rolled up and leaned over James, suddenly kissing him passionately. ‘Come on James, make it good.’
James kissed back but kept his eyes closed, Sirius was all over him now, and that was weird, though his body was blatantly responding. When he eventually opened his eyes again Sirius was already working on the zip of his trousers, but Remus was watching them both with that expression again, and James knew he’d do anything to keep Remus looking at him like that.
Then Sirius’ mouth was sliding down over his cock and it was horrifically good, despite everything, despite the fact that this was his best mate who was sucking him. James kept his eyes on Remus, who was touching himself again, his hand moving fast, eyes half closed as he watched them both intently.
‘Here,’ hissed James, dragging Remus down next to him and kissing him desperately. James didn’t care about anything else any more, this was strangely perfect, even though if he’d ever tried to imagine this happening before he wouldn’t have included Sirius, somehow Sirius being there made it all the better. This way he could have someone sucking his cock, and still feel the tip of Remus’ cock against his side, jabbing into him as Remus touched himself. Fuck, it was good.
And fuck he wasn’t going to last much longer. ‘Moony, are you close?’
‘Mm,’ he whimpered, his hand getting faster, and James’ hip was already getting rather damp, and that certainly wasn’t helping him last longer. Especially not while listening to Remus’ moans and feeling him watching him, watching all over James’ body, especially watching Sirius’ very-pink lips as they slid up and down on James’ cock.
He slid his right hand round and covered Remus’ frantically moving hand with his own, wanting to help, wanting to feel it too. Remus moaned a little more and James turned to claim the kiss he’d been wanting again all this time, sliding his tongue in quickly and lapping deftly at Remus’ mouth.
James couldn’t imagine there was anything in the world more erotic than this; Sirius’ hot mouth and Remus’ beautiful, almost-naked body touching him, and he was starting to lose control now, and he was going to come, oh fuck, yes-
In the middle of James’ orgasm, still shooting come in to Sirius’ perfect mouth, Remus made a brief choking noise and James hip and hand were wet with Remus’ come and that just made everything even more perfect, oh fuck, oh.
He found himself quite unable to move, just lay there shaking and shuddering, and it took him a long time to come down. He was only very vaguely aware of Sirius leaning up to lick down his side and realised that he was probably licking Remus’ fingers too. Another surge of jealousy washed over him, but before it even had time to take hold Sirius was kissing him and sharing the taste, and James decided it wasn’t all that disgusting.
‘So you’re still completely straight, James?’ Remus asked slyly, as Sirius shoved them over so he could settle on Remus’ other side.
‘Yes.’
Sirius sniggered into Remus’ neck.
‘So you won’t be wanting to do this ever again then?’
James opened his mouth to say ‘of course not’ but the words wouldn’t form, being that it would have been a total lie if he had said it. He turned a little to wrap an arm around Remus’ narrow waist, letting his fingers gently tickle the skin on Remus’ hip. ‘Shut up.’
And don't ever let me write porn again! I mean it! Also, I will post this on mpp_ot3, but where else should it go? Would I get away with remusxsirius? (probably not) Might have to join marauders_slash or pervy_werewolf, hee hee, oh poor me. This is dedicated to all the people who listened to me whinge about how bad I was at writing porn.
Title: My Beautiful Friend
Author: kabeyk
Pairing: James/Remus/Sirius
Rating: Maybe NC17, but definitely a hard R.
Word count: I try and write something short and it ends up at 7,500+. Sorry.
Disclaimer: Really not mine.
Summary: Things had been a bit weird for a while now, but when Sirius turns it into a competition James is forced to ask himself what he really wants…
My Beautiful Friend
There had been something… different lingering for a while, though it took some time for James to notice it, and even longer for anyone to mention it.
The first time it wasn’t really anything much at all, Sirius was rather tipsy and asked one of those silly questions that he was liable to ask just to force some sort of reaction.
‘If you had to shag one of us, who’d it be?’
James glared soundly at him and sighed.
‘Come on,’ Sirius insisted.
‘One of who?’
‘Me or Moony or Wormtail?’
‘Er… you?’
‘Really? Because I’m irresistible?’
There was a head-toss and some narcissistic preening to go with that comment, no doubt, so James focused his eyes on the patch of curtain over his friend’s shoulder. ‘No.’
‘Because you’re my best mate and at least we’d be together, you know, if we were ever forced to do that?’
There was a worrying amount of glee in Sirius’ voice as he said that. James wondered what sort of situation could possibly necessitate shagging one of your mates. ‘No.’
‘Well why then?’ Sirius had started to huff at him because he wasn’t playing the game right.
‘So you’d have to suffer right along with me.’
And James found himself tackled off the bed and onto the floor.
After all the yelling and kicking and punching, all the screams of ‘rape!’ and ‘oh, Padfoot, my darling!’ and ‘take me, Prongs!’. After Remus had woken up and started screaming at them that it was 3am and they might want to shut up before he killed them. After all that was over, James mostly forgot about it.
#
The second time was more serious, not the conversation really, more the situation they were in.
They’d been mostly trading insults, childish words helping to alleviate the tension, up until that point.
That time it’d been James who’d made the first comment, James who’d started the conversation, though he hadn’t meant to.
‘Well, those scars’ll go eventually, and at least it didn’t spoil his pretty face,’ he’d said. To James it was a silly throw-away sort of remark.
‘You think Moony’s pretty?’ Sirius asked, still fairly subdued, quiet to an extent James had only seen once before. But there was still a malicious hint in his voice, a warning note that his answer could be taken seriously, and even repeated back at a later date if he didn’t phrase it correctly, if his tone wasn’t quite right.
‘If he was a girl, I s’pose.’ James accompanied his words with a nonchalant shrug, and kept his eyes steady on Remus’ pale face as any change of stance would possibly be construed as suspicious.
‘So you’d shag him if he were a girl?’
‘Oh for fuck’s sake, Padfoot, I don’t know. Just trying to change the subject are you?’
Sirius had scowled back rather hard, face all screwed up, before he said, ‘would you do him if you were a girl?’
‘What the-‘ James favoured him with an exasperated look. ‘I don’t know. It’s the same thing, isn’t it?’
‘Not really.’
‘I suppose it isn’t. It’s hard to imagine Moony being a girl or being a girl myself, for some reason. Would you?’
‘He’s pretty enough,’ Sirius shrugged. James thought it was rather unfair of him to suggest that his own response wasn’t the important one, being that he was always the first to initiate these conversations.
‘And you aren’t pretty enough?’ James grinned, turning to wink at his mate. He was hoping to lighten things, but keeping the hint of anger and betrayal in his voice. Forgiveness was a given, but shouldn’t be assumed as such.
Sirius tossed his head, letting black locks swish round before falling in front of his eyes again. James hated that he did that; knew how attractive he was and abused it, let it infiltrate all his relationships, used it to influence anyone and everyone. ‘I think the fact that you can’t take your eyes off me proves that I am?’
James forced his voice calm and said ‘I prefer my men a bit more manly, my pretty little puppy,’ and he knew he’d scored there because ‘cute’ was one of Sirius’ most hated words.
‘Manly like Moony?’ Somewhere along the line James had lost the thread of what was going on. Luckily Remus woke at the sound of his own name and the discussion was temporarily over.
#
The next time it wasn’t even a conversation.
One evening, Remus staggered into the dormitory, breathless from running, and threw James’ cloak off, revealing himself to be all flushed and sweaty.
James tried not to laugh in triumph as he felt Sirius’ body go rigid next to him, heard the quill cease to scratch the parchment they were both working on.
‘Alright, Moony?’ James asked, proud of his steady tone.
‘Yeah, just Filch after me.’ Remus smoothed down his hair and dusted off his robes carefully.
‘Oh dear.’ James favoured him with his most sympathetic smile, though it may have turned out wrong, because he was feeling rather self-satisfied.
‘Erm, is something wrong? Do you two want to be alone?’ Remus asked them, and James couldn’t decipher the look in his eyes, both wary and… something else. He was starting to back nervously towards the door though.
‘Don’t be silly, Moony, we’re just sorting the map, why?’
‘Well, why are you both… looking at me funny?’
‘Oh don’t worry about that, Padfoot is just feeling a bit queer today,’ James said blithely, keeping his voice even and being careful not to let the emphasis rest anywhere in particular. He had to congratulate himself on that one; it was fucking brilliant.
‘Er, okay.’ Remus peered at them both as if they were rather mad. ‘I’ll just get my bag and leave you to it, shall I?’ He grabbed his school bag and edged cautiously from the room.
James grinned widely, especially satisfied that Sirius was now avoiding his eyes.
It was only afterwards that he realised that he must have been staring too.
#
The fourth time it was so blatant it was ridiculous.
Remus had got out of the bath, walked across the dormitory, shrugged his dressing gown off and started to change into his pyjamas, and James could feel that Sirius’ eyes were glued to Remus’ body. He found himself shocked at how obvious Sirius was being; the idiot may as well have unzipped his trousers and got on with it then and there.
For his part, Remus didn’t seem to have noticed, must have assumed that his room mates were just getting on with their homework, and he didn’t give away even the slightest sign that he’d noticed, or that he cared if anyone saw him naked or not.
James actually heard Sirius moan unhappily when Remus finally climbed under his duvet.
Fucking poof, James sneered to himself.
#
James was less happy about the fifth time, because he was well aware that he hadn’t had the upper hand in that conversation.
Remus had wandered out of their dormitory because he had to go and help Lizzy Smith (silly cow, thought James) with her Astronomy project, and Sirius had coolly turned to James and said ‘you do realise that you’re just as bad as me, don’t you?’
‘Oh fuck off, you’re as badly-behaved and evil as they come; I’m merely tortured and misunderstood.’ James smirked to himself; despite the fact that Sirius could clearly pull off tortured and misunderstood better than he could, at least he was the one with the quick and witty brain.
‘I meant about Remus.’
The reason James had messed this one up was because he’d genuinely not known what Sirius had been getting at until it was too late. ‘W-what about Remus?’
And then it was Sirius’ turn to be smug for once. ‘Come off it Prongs, you couldn’t have been more jealous of that Smith girl.’
‘I was not jealous!’
‘And you spend all day sneaking up to see him every five minutes when he’s ill at full moon.’
‘That doesn’t mean… it doesn’t mean anything! I’m just being a good friend, not anything more!’ And there he’d broken the golden rule -the rule that said they never mentioned any specifics, never admitted anything- without even noticing he’d done it.
‘Did I even mention anything more?’ Sirius asked innocently, but the gleam of victory twinkled clearly in his eyes.
James, being unprepared, had had no choice other than to gather up his things and storm down to the common room, cursing the fact that he’d been too caught up in his own witticisms to pay attention to the conversation’s suggestive undertones.
#
The next time was no-one’s fault, because they’d both got quite, quite drunk.
Sirius was always predisposed to speak things that should not be spoken, so again he’d started them off.
‘Do you ever think about him when you wank?’
James found he’d just frozen. ‘What?’
‘You think about Moony when you wank?’ Sirius asked, almost impatiently.
‘Do you?’
‘Mm. Sometimes.’
James was horrified. It was fair enough to share random fantasies with one another, but it was a little too specific for his liking to actually admit to what you wanked to. ‘I don’t really think about anything much,’ he replied and it was quite true, he was usually just thinking about how it felt. Whatever thoughts were going through his head were mainly irrelevant, and, irrelevant or not, they were none of Sirius’ business.
‘Yeah, like fuck!’
‘Piss off.’
‘So you do then?’ Sirius raised an eyebrow and, to James’ surprise, licked his lips.
‘Well what do you think about?’ James snapped.
‘Fucking him, obviously.’
‘You want to fuck him?’
‘Don’t you?’
James hadn’t really thought about it. There was a big difference between watching Remus a bit too often and wanting to put his cock inside him. ‘No.’ And the idea of it didn’t at all send a strange rush of some unidentifiable feeling flaming it’s way through his body.
‘You do.’
‘Don’t,’ James hissed back, struggling to keep his voice calm and trying not to wriggle.
‘You want to fuck me?’
‘No.’ Then he turned quickly because his best friend had just offered him sex in a serious tone of voice.
Sirius shrugged. ‘Be close enough, wouldn’t it?’
‘You’re sick,’ he spat.
‘No sicker than you.'
'Like hell am I as sick as--' James began to protest, but by then his best friend’s mouth had closed over his own. ‘Mm!’ he shoved Sirius hard. ‘Padfoot, fuck, you can’t just pretend I’m Moony!’
‘I s’pose not. Still, if you let me, I’ll let you…?’
‘Fuck off!’ James struggled to get up and locked himself in the bathroom, it being the only reasonable form of escape at that moment; at 3am and terribly drunk.
It turned out to be a very shrewd choice in the end, because he was throwing up not long after.
#
James decided there had been far too much of all of this, and that the best way to sort it was by finding out what Remus thought about it all. After all, he could hardly have his best mate jumping him every so often, every time he was sexually frustrated and wanted another boy to kiss, every time he wanted someone to pretend was Remus.
He didn’t really know how to start the conversation, so he went with ‘have you noticed Padfoot has been behaving a bit strangely recently?’
‘How could I not?’ Remus replied.
James sighed, not wanting to have to say the next bit, not knowing how to. What could he say? ‘Not his usual weird, different weird.’
‘I have noticed that I have to lock the bathroom door when I shower now, if that’s what you mean.’
James was utterly flabbergasted, not having at all suspected Remus of knowing. Remus had always acted completely oblivious. ‘Right…’ And what could he say to that? He could hardly ask Remus if he too had ever fancied being a screaming poofter, could he? ‘So… have you ever- have you ever thought about- about not locking the bathroom door?’
Remus watched him carefully, and James struggled to hold his gaze calmly. ‘Once or twice, yes.’
James didn’t really know why Remus’ confession had affected him so strongly, but it somehow made him rather angry. ‘So… will you?’
‘I don’t know; I’m feeling rather confused about all this myself.’
‘Right.’ James frowned, not knowing what to say.
‘Probably in the same way you are.’
‘Yeah-‘ Eventually James realised what he’d said. ‘I mean, I’m confused about Sirius’ behaviour, not, not like I’m a bender or anything.’
‘Oh. Right. Are you sure?’
James peered incredulously at his friend, shocked that someone as non-confrontational as Remus had dared to say that. ‘What?’
‘Well you’re acting as mad as him.’
‘But…’ James wanted to protest, but then Remus was saying the same thing Sirius had.
‘To be honest, I thought the two of you were…’ Remus trailed off hurriedly, a terrified expression stealing it’s way over his face as their eyes locked onto each others’. ‘I take it you aren’t then?’
‘No. No!’
‘Okay, sorry. Sorry. Just, you’ve been a bit secretive of late, haven’t you?’
‘Well we aren’t! No. Definitely not.’ James glared at Remus, who’d started to blush.
‘Okay, I get it! I’m sorry, okay!’ And with that Remus stormed out of the room. James thought it was hardly fair that Remus was the one who got to storm out, seeing as he’d been the one suggesting all those offensive things in the first place.
#
The next conversation was forced on James barely hours after.
‘What did you say to Moony?’ Sirius’ eyes were flashing blue murder, and his fingers starting to curl in that about-to-throw-a-punch kind of way.
‘Does it matter?’ James tried to edge away without actually appearing afraid.
‘It matters to me.’ Sirius had begun to scratch at his top lip with his bottom teeth in that fascinating way of his.
‘He thinks you and I are having an affair,’ James stated, as a way of detracting from the fact that it had been him who’d brought up the subject of Sirius’ bizarre sexuality with Remus.
‘…what?’
‘Seemed rather disappointed we weren’t actually.’
Sirius’ fingers replaced his teeth and pinched viciously at his lip, repeatedly tugging it away from his gums. James allowed himself to relax slightly, that particular gesture tended to be a portent of less violent actions, and more often than not signalled only that his friend was deep in thought. ‘So,’ Sirius said. ‘So.’
‘So what?’ James muttered impatiently.
‘He didn’t seem at all jealous?’
‘No. Are you seriously after him?’
‘Shut up James, I’m thinking.’
James pouted and refrained from making any joke about Sirius’ inability to have more than one thought in his head at any one time.
‘Why would he be disappointed?’ Sirius asked finally.
‘I’m not even sure he was! I don’t know; he doesn’t like being wrong.’
‘Yet… somehow that explanation doesn’t seem sufficient, does it?’ Sirius’ grin was fearsomely horrible, James thought, already starting to worry.
#
The next time he didn’t even get a chance to have a conversation, he’d been quietly hexing Sirius’ sock-drawer to do something wet and explody when touched, when he found himself thrown against the wall.
He knew immediately who it was, though it was a second before he understood what was really happening; that he wasn’t being attacked for his unwarranted sock-smiting, but was actually being kissed.
He kept his eyes screwed shut in the hope that he could pretend it was someone else, and kept his lips clamped together to stop any further unwanted intrusions. Unfortunately, he’d dropped his wand in shock at the surprise of it all, and having his arms pinned to the wall put him at a physical disadvantage too.
Eventually the lips were removed and he found himself able to breathe, but it seemed they’d moved only to hiss ‘come on, James.’
‘No,’ he grunted, still with lips tightly closed.
‘Please, please. Make this look good and I swear I’ll do anything you want. Anything!’
‘And what makes you think I want you to do ‘anything’ for me?’
‘Quick!’ and this time he’d left his mouth open so he had no chance.
He let his body go limp and simply gave himself over to whatever his friend wanted, the tongue swiping over and over inside his mouth. Oh fuck, oh fuck, oh fuck, he thought idly, having nothing else to do. Here’s me kissing Padfoot, the bastard. If he was honest about it, Sirius was a good kisser -he’d probably had a lot of practice, James thought bitterly- but there was no way he’d ever admit that aloud. After a while he found he actually had to concentrate on not kissing his friend back, kissing was clearly some sort of natural instinct and he had to actually consciously subdue the urge.
In an attempt at distracting himself, he decided that an even better idea would be to make it look really good and totally ham it up. Ah, payback, he thought blissfully, clutching his hands to Sirius’ buttocks whilst attempting to throttle him with his tongue. Though it was a little worrying that Sirius didn’t seem that disturbed by the latest development.
In fact, he was just kissing back even harder...
James began to panic quietly again, but his mental distress was suddenly interrupted by the door slamming.
He pulled away in horror, only to see that Sirius didn’t look horrified at all.
‘Si-‘
‘Oh no, did someone just walk in on us?’ Sirius’ eyes gleamed dangerously. ‘How embarrassing…’
‘You bastard!’ James hissed, ‘this is all to make Remus jealous?’ He swiped a sleeve across his mouth, but it was cold comfort when the inside of his mouth still tasted Sirius-y.
‘And what is wrong with that?’ Sirius preened a little and James wouldn’t have been surprised if he’d started to rub his hands together with evil glee too.
‘Well it won’t work, for starters.’
‘Don’t be such a pessimist; if he sees what a good time we two are having being delightfully homosexual, he’ll soon want to be a part of it.’
‘I severely doubt that. He probably just thinks we’re disgusting now.’
‘Nonsense, he’s probably well on the way to being madly and irrevocably in lust with me.’
‘Or me,’ James found he’d said before the more sensible parts of his brain had been engaged.
‘So it is like that then? Well. May the best man win!’ Sirius raised an eyebrow and hurried off to find Remus, presumably, while James was still cursing his own stupidity.
#
James knew he was good at plotting, having spent most of his school years involved in one evil scheme or another, but he was clearly very bad at plotting something like this. He’d never been able to persuade girls he liked to date him, so he couldn’t visualise it being any different just because it was a boy he wanted this time.
This was the sort of thing that Sirius was good at.
Admittedly, James hadn’t wanted to acknowledge that he wanted Remus, wanted another boy, but that didn’t matter now. Because now it was a competition, and he was buggered if he was going to let Sirius win. Or rather he would be buggered if-
James decided not to think about the details, because obviously he wasn’t interested in that sort of thing, oh no. All he needed to do was to make Remus like him better than Sirius, a competition that he knew they’d been secretly carrying on with for some time anyway.
And he did have an advantage over Sirius, because Sirius would go all out, ridiculously over the top, fawning and flashing and flirting and who knows what else.
James would be cool and mature about it. Indeed.
#
James crept into their dormitory on Sunday afternoon, knowing that Peter was off with his girlfriend and that Sirius was off somewhere else too, so he knew that now would be a perfect time to talk to Remus. Though he didn’t have a clue what he wanted to talk to Remus about or what he intended to achieve by talking to him. What was he trying to do here anyway? You are trying to piss off Sirius is what you are trying to do, he told himself, you have to focus.
Remus was sitting on his bed reading a book as James snuck in, though he didn’t even bother to look up, to James’ annoyance.
James was again struck by Remus’ looks. He really was quite disconcertingly pretty; his long dusty-brown hair hanging in his eyes, brushing gently against his freckled nose and cheeks, long freckled fingers deftly turning the pages, his teeth nipping at his lower lip.
I bet he bites his lip when he comes.
Where the fuck did that thought arrive from? James asked himself angrily; it isn’t like I’m some sort of poof. Of course he wasn’t; it was just Remus who was far too pretty, which wasn’t at all James’ fault, oh no. Stupid pretty Remus.
‘Remus?’ His voice shook slightly. For fuck’s sake James, he told himself, get it together; you aren’t some soppy schoolgirl with a crush.
‘Oh. Hey, James.’ Remus’ voice was rather guarded, he was clearly still annoyed about yesterday.
James took a deep breath and sat down next to Remus on the bed. ‘Sirius and I aren’t having an affair you know.’
Remus flushed. ‘Of course you aren’t, that’s why I didn’t walk in on the two of you snogging yesterday.’
‘Er. About that.’
‘Yes?’ Remus finally looked up from his book and stared straight into James’ eyes, which didn’t at all help.
‘Look. I’d told him what you’d thought and he-‘
‘So you were playing a trick on me?’
That was exactly what James had been about to suggest, but Remus looked so angry, that he couldn’t bring himself to agree. ‘Not, not exactly. Well, I told him and he thought it’d be funny to try it out.’
‘Really?’
‘Yeah. Er, he has tried to kiss me before,’ James found himself confessing in some desperate attempt to placate Remus’ anger.
Remus’ eyebrows went up. ‘Really?’
‘Yeah, when he’s drunk and stuff. So it wasn’t a big deal or anything. I just thought I’d humour him for once. I mean, it doesn’t mean anything or anything-‘
‘Because you’re totally straight.’
‘Er. Yeah, yeah.’
‘Okay. So you were just kissing him for a laugh.’
‘Well, yeah, er no. Er. Well it’s quite natural to kiss someone back when they kiss you and I wasn’t really paying attention and he is very good at kissing-‘
‘Is he?’
James ignored the flash of jealousy he felt at Remus’ question. ‘Er. Yeah.’
‘So you enjoyed it.’
James panicked a little. ‘Well, no, because I’m-‘
‘Completely straight, yes of course.’
‘-but it was okay, and stuff,’ he shrugged.
‘So you’d do it again then?’
‘No! Well, maybe. No. Does it matter?’ Suddenly he was slap bang in the middle of yet another senseless conversation, not having a clue what was the right or wrong answer to any of Remus’ questions, and scared to look at Remus in case Remus could see the truth in his eyes.
‘I don’t want you to have any regrets, James,’ Remus sighed.
‘It wasn’t that bad.’
‘No, I mean, if you did like him, but you were afraid of admitting that you were gay-‘
‘I’m not! I’m not gay or anything, I’m just-‘ James stopped suddenly, realising what he’d said.
‘Just what?’
‘Nothing! I’m straight!’ he protested.
‘I wouldn’t mind, and I’m sure Peter wouldn’t either, if you and Sirius wanted to-‘ Remus’ voice was gently and comforting, the sort of voice that encouraged confidences.
‘No! Look, if I was going to be, be some sort of bender, then I wouldn’t like Sirius-‘
‘Why ever not? It would make sense; he is your best friend.’
Remus was asking a lot of very stupid questions, James decided. ‘That doesn’t mean I fancy him! He’s all- I prefer- Just no. No.’
‘He is very good looking.’
‘Remus; he’s just not my type, okay?’
‘Okay,’ Remus muttered, almost sulkily.
‘Good.’
‘So who is your type?’
‘No-one!’ James yelped a bit too loudly.
Remus gave him an odd look. ‘So you like no-one?’
‘No boys! I don’t like any boys.’
‘I see.’ Remus was watching him and frowning, as if trying to work something out. ‘Oh.’
‘Oh what?’
‘This.’ Remus reached a hand up and carefully smoothed a strand of hair out of James’ eyes.
James trembled as Remus’ fingers stayed pressed to his face, smoothing their way over the arm of his glasses and down his cheek bone. He didn’t know what to do, somehow he’d given himself away, and somehow Remus didn’t mind and was actually…
Remus was leaning in, and James was thinking of course I’m going to pull away, or even punch him in the face, like I nearly did with Sirius. Oh, yes, any minute now. I’m going to shove him over and-
And then Remus’ lips were against his, and well, a quick kiss was hardly going to matter all that much, was it? It was only a kiss, after all. Just Remus’ lips touching his own…
And then Remus had opened his mouth and was pressing his hot wet tongue between James’ lips, and James hadn’t even realised that his own mouth had opened to let him. Remus’ tongue slid against his and he couldn’t help but love it, Remus tasted so nice and his skin smelt so sweet, and before he knew it he’d buried his fingers in warm brown hair and was kissing back in earnest.
And it wasn’t that much of a problem, after all, Remus was pretty like girls were pretty, so it wasn’t his fault if he was finding this all a bit confusing. James pulled away a little, just so he could peer into those soft brown eyes, his gaze flickering over pale, feminine, freckled skin, before tilting his head sideways and leaning closer for a deeper kiss. No big deal, Remus was simply very good at kissing, and so soft like a girl, and-
They were rudely interrupted by the door banging open violently, hinges screaming in protest.
James paled as he twitched reluctantly away from Remus. ‘Ah.’
Sirius threw himself at his best friend, and seconds later he was sitting on James’ stomach while trying to strangle him and/or scratch his eyes out. Trust that flaming poof to fight like a girl, James thought, refusing to acknowledge the fact that he himself had, up until a minute ago, been kissing a member of his own sex.
‘Remus, are you going to help me, or are you going to just sit there?’ he yelled indistinctly, muffled by Sirius’ arm.
With great effort, James managed wrestle Sirius off a bit and turn his head to the side, but Remus was just sitting and gawping at them.
‘Remus!’ he shouted.
‘See, even Moony thinks you deserve a good beating, you bastard,’ Sirius hissed, pummelling at James’ torso.
Then James realised what had been really going on. ‘Fuck, Moony…’
Remus made a strange squeaky noise.
‘Padfoot, get off me. Padfoot!’ James yelled urgently.
‘Why should I?’
‘Just-‘
James managed to scramble out from under his best friend in the confusion, and then they were all just sitting on the bed awkwardly, Remus blushing profusely.
‘What?’ Sirius asked impatiently.
‘Look, Remus, we really aren’t having an affair you know,’ James told him.
‘O-kay.’
‘I don’t get it,’ Sirius muttered sulkily.
‘Sorry,’ mumbled Remus, blushing some more.
‘S’okay,’ James told him.
‘No, really, I’m sorry, I-‘ He tried to climb off the bed, but James grabbed his arm and stopped him.
‘How about we just talk about this.’
‘Talk about what?’ asked Sirius fiercely.
‘I don’t know, just this.’
‘Well you won,’ snapped Sirius. ‘You bastard,’ he added.
‘This was some sort of competition?’ Remus asked in horror, trying to get up again.
‘No. No, it was- well it was sort of a competition, but not the way you think.’
‘But you won because I kissed you?’ Remus snarled at him.
‘Well, I suppose…’
‘And what did you win?’ Remus’ voice had gone all horrible and nasty and bitter, and James didn’t know what to do about it.
‘I, well, I suppose the prize was… getting to kiss you.’ James found he was blushing himself.
Remus looked astonished at that, while Sirius was still sulking. James was utterly confused; he wanted to kiss Remus again, most definitely, but he’d actually upset his best friend and he hadn’t really wanted that to happen.
‘So what… what now?’ Remus asked, suddenly all quiet and shy again.
And James knew he had to sacrifice what he wanted for Sirius’ sake. He took a deep breath and smiled wickedly, though it killed him. ‘Why don’t we see if I get as excited watching you two as Remus does watching Sirius and I?’
His two friends just stared back.
‘…Remus?’ Sirius asked carefully after a while. James could see his friend was very nervous now, twitchy with anticipation, eyes flickering around the enclosed canopy of the bed.
Remus frowned thoughtfully at James, before carefully saying, ‘I suppose.’
One second Sirius was sitting calmly, the next he’d thrown himself at Remus, and Remus gasped loudly as he was crushed to the mattress by Sirius’ eager body. James thought that Sirius’ kissing technique appeared rather more dubious from the angle of an observer, very sloppy indeed. Sirius was very intent on his task, holding tight to Remus’ jaw, fingers occasionally curling to stroke his skin, legs either side of Remus’ to keep him in place.
James couldn’t see that there was anything erotic about this, just watching people kiss. The only thing he really felt was the slight jealousy, that he wanted to be the one who got to kiss Remus. He knew that he should stop this now, just get up and leave them to get on with it, but he couldn’t quite make himself, being that he was so jealous. He knew that Sirius should get to keep Remus; beautiful, edible, sweet-tasting Remus, but it still wasn’t fair. Wasn’t fair that he only got one brief, unsatisfying, addictive kiss, when Sirius would probably get so much more.
He was just steeling himself to finally make his move when he realised that Remus was watching him.
Sirius had begun to suck and bite on Remus’ smooth, delicate white neck, also unbuttoning Remus’ shirt to reveal a tantalizing strip of his pale, freckled chest. This was all too much for James, his resolve already terribly weak, the thought of getting to see Remus almost naked was far too enticing. Especially as Remus was watching him while all this happened. Remus didn’t want him to leave.
His eyes were locked onto Remus’, watching his friend’s face change with each touch Sirius made, seeing each flutter of pleasure pass over his features. Okay, so maybe this was just a bit erotic. Then, as Sirius’ lips clamped down over a nipple, Remus smiled; a lazy, wicked smile, a satisfied smile, and James felt the lust flow through him too, suddenly excited because this was what Remus really wanted. Both of them. At once.
Then in one quick movement everything changed. Remus jerked his body unexpectedly and then their positions were inverted, Sirius was the one pinned helplessly to the bed, Remus crouched triumphantly over him. James actually yelped with laughter at the look of horrified shock on Sirius’ face; he doubted very much that Sirius was ever anything but on top.
And then his laughter froze in his throat because Remus then started on Sirius, holding him down, eagerly kissing first his lips then working his way down the rest of his body, mouth sliding unhurriedly, but pausing occasionally to sink his teeth in. After a surprisingly short amount of time Sirius went still, then even more surprisingly did nothing else save the making the occasional moan as Remus calmly conquered him.
And James had never seen anything hotter in his entire life; his beautiful and usually docile friend so dominant, so perfect and confident and in control. And he was indeed far rougher than Sirius had been with him, twisting Sirius around so he could trail his lips to whichever body part he fancied, jerking clothes aside fiercely and biting hard into Sirius’ flesh.
Sirius took it all perfectly calmly, submissively, moving only to gently stoke Remus’ skin in the most placid of ways. James watched his best friend’s hand as it slid under Remus’ open shirt, exposing a narrow hip-bone, as Remus kissed his way back up to Sirius’ lips.
James’ own breathing was fast now, ridiculously so, and he was harder than he could ever remember having been before, wanting nothing more than to be able to open his trousers and- Actually there were a couple of things he wanted more than that but he was trying not to think about them, difficult though it was. But he told himself it wouldn’t be too terrible of him if he just touched Remus a little, just the hot, freckled skin on his hip, maybe smooth his hand across Remus’ back, just for a second.
His fingertips had made contact before he’d even finished the thought, Remus’ skin so soft, the thin layer of hair making it feel like fresh velvet. Not wanting to stop, he then dragged his hand back and round until he was touching the skin at the side of Remus’ belly, pressed as it was against Sirius’. Remus moaned and wriggled a little, hips thrusting slightly against Sirius’, and James wondered if he was hard too, hard like James was, and the thought of Remus’ cock, stiff and desperate, was only making him harder himself.
James worked his hand in further between them, curling his fingers into the almost non-existent gap, and edged his whole body a little closer to the pair of them, now able to feel Sirius’ skin too. He couldn’t possibly stay here much longer, but he could also feel that tempting line of hair leading down from Remus’ belly button, and he wanted so desperately to be able to look at Remus, look at all of him, run his hands over all of his skin…
His two friends continued to kiss hungrily and loudly, lips and tongues smacking together, and James didn’t think this was fair at all, to be stuck merely watching. He reached his other hand up and let it cup Sirius’ cheek with it’s sharp, elegant cheekbone, and slid his thumb in to touch where their lips met. The digit was quickly enveloped by their mouths and he gasped as he felt hot tongues swirling around it.
James gave in, only for a second he told himself, and lay down next to them; there was no way he could leave right now, his left hand resting between two warm bellies, his right thumb being thoroughly snogged. He desperately resisted the urge to push his hips forward, to rub himself against the side of his best friend, but he did nuzzle his face in close to Sirius’ neck, nose resting under his jaw and against the heel of his own hand. The frame of his glasses was digging in a bit, but he wouldn’t be relinquishing them any time soon, not when the view was so beautiful.
He was just debating whether he could manage to extract one of his hands for more urgent purposes when teeth clamped around his thumb and his hand was pulled away, yanking his arm up. Remus had sat up slightly and was watching him with wide, lustful eyes, his shirt now hanging off one narrow, white shoulder and his trousers slung low on his hips. His cheeks were heavily flushed, his hair tumbling into his eyes and his cock was clearly very erect.
James decided he wasn’t leaving ever, not with Remus looking like this, looking at him like this. The teeth gently let go of his thumb, but Remus’ lips stayed there and he sucked hard, never taking his eyes off James’, his alluring pink lips wrapped around as if he were sucking him off.
James whimpered, his lips twitching with need, and he could tell that Sirius was undoubtedly staring at Remus with the same dazed expression he was.
Remus, meanwhile, released the thumb and licked James’ palm, which caused another pathetic whimper to escape James’ lips. He cursed himself for being so feeble, but surely no-one could have any presence of mind when in such a situation as this, watching Remus beautifully licking and biting at his fingers, wondering how fingers calloused from hours spent on a broomstick could still be so sensitive.
All too soon Remus released James’ hand, but before he could even think about complaining Remus had edged closer and begun unbuttoning his shirt for him. James watched Remus closely, watched his fingers and the way he licked his lips slowly. James felt Remus’ hands smooth their way down his back as his shirt was removed and he sighed with pleasure.
‘Ohhhh,’ Sirius whined, clearly feeling left out. Selfish bugger, thought James.
‘Aw, what’s wrong?’ Remus whispered, his voice all hoarse and lustful, leaning down over Sirius, his hands either side of his head.
Sirius was pouting childishly, his eyes begging for something.
James lay next to Sirius and watched them both carefully; he knew what would have to happen next, but he didn’t bother to be nervous because he was far too desperate and frustrated.
Remus simply smiled, gently biting his own lip -causing James to arch himself into Sirius’ hip with pure want- and slid his hand down the front of Sirius’ trousers. Sirius moaned and thrust upwards, and James could do nothing but watch jealously as Remus pushed himself against Sirius’ thigh and stroked his cock slowly but firmly, a look of deep concentration on his face.
‘Oh, fuck, this is better than I imagined,’ Sirius groaned happily, and James was surprised to find he was enjoying the intense look on his best friend’s face.
‘You’ve been imagining this?’ Remus asked, eyes gleaming, watching Sirius carefully.
‘Yes, oh yes, all the time…’
Remus’ eyes flickered to James. ‘You all jealous, Prongs?’
‘No,’ he lied.
‘Don’t worry, you’ll get a go.’
James experienced a quick flash of annoyance at the patronising comment; who had put Remus in charge of all this anyway? Remus, who had been blushing at the mere thought of it earlier. Though he had to admit to himself that this was exactly what both he and Sirius had been secretly wanting for ages. They both wanted Remus, and that clearly put him in charge.
‘In fact, you could have a go now if you wanted,’ Remus continued.
James shot Remus a puzzled expression, but before he could decipher Remus’ new even more predatory grin, his left hand had been grasped and pushed down Sirius’ trousers in place of Remus’.
‘There we go,’ Remus sighed contentedly, and James knew that this was what Remus had wanted all along.
Remus quickly undid Sirius’ trousers for him and pulled his underwear down, as James continued to stroke Sirius’ cock. It wasn’t actually all that strange really, excessively aroused as he was he probably would have done anything, though he would have rather been stroking himself like that. However, stroking someone else like that was pretty erotic too and he began to thrust in earnest against Sirius’ right thigh, needing something to stop the ache.
‘Moony!’ James gasped as Remus settled down on Sirius’ other side to watch.
‘What?’
‘At least take some more clothes off!’
Remus grinned again and sat up to peel off his shirt and pull down his own trousers, and both James and Sirius stared openly at his body. James groaned deeply, wishing he could just throw himself at Remus, tackle him to the bed and take him right there. Remus was fairly bony, but in a carefully muscled way, his arms clearly stronger than they looked and even his chest was tightly toned. Remus blushed as they both watched him, which somehow made him even more beguiling; his features delicate and beautiful, eyes glazed with lust.
‘More,’ James gasped, propping himself up on an elbow, and rubbing Sirius faster in his own excitement.
Remus moaned and slid his pants down, a hand quickly moving to clasp his own cock. James whined frantically in Sirius’ ear, driving his crotch harder against his friend, wanting so badly to touch Remus, so caught up in the idea of it, that he almost missed it as Sirius cried out and suddenly his hand was very hot and wet, Sirius groaning and continuing to thrust until it was completely over.
Remus snatched James’ hand almost immediately and ran his tongue over his sticky fingers. James was quite shocked, but couldn’t help but enjoy it as Remus’ kissed and bit at his fingers again, shuddering as his skin prickled with goosebumps.
Sirius was still gasping, reaching for Remus, clearly wanting a kiss, but Remus just smiled and lowered his mouth to Sirius’ stomach, licking him clean. Sirius quickly pulled their mouths together, which James thought was a bit disgusting all things considered, and they kissed keenly, Remus clearly very aroused indeed. James ran his fingers over Remus’ back, not wanting to be left out again, watching how Remus’ body moved and sliding his hands all over, over his narrow hips, taut arse and firm thighs. James knew that this shouldn’t arouse him, that he should be wanting curved, soft, female limbs instead of hard male ones. But Remus was so stunning, so perfect and touchable. James pushed his lips into the small of Remus’ back, sighing with pleasure and nuzzling into the soft hairs there, before sliding his lips down and kissing the curve of his arse and down to his thighs.
Sirius’ hands were all over Remus however, touching and grabbing as they kissed each other, and James was continually forced to fight to get his own touches in.
‘Moony, anything, I’ll do anything,’ Sirius gasped around their mouths as James tried sinking his teeth into Remus’ beautiful bottom.
‘Uh…’ Remus twitched slightly, ‘really?’
‘Yes, please, anything.’
Remus turned to give James one of those sly looks again. ‘Suck James off,’ he said as he turned back.
James was horrified, though Sirius made no objection.
‘You want it don’t you?’ Remus asked him, which James thought was so unfair because at that moment he would have done anything to please Remus. ‘On your back then.’
Sirius rolled up and leaned over James, suddenly kissing him passionately. ‘Come on James, make it good.’
James kissed back but kept his eyes closed, Sirius was all over him now, and that was weird, though his body was blatantly responding. When he eventually opened his eyes again Sirius was already working on the zip of his trousers, but Remus was watching them both with that expression again, and James knew he’d do anything to keep Remus looking at him like that.
Then Sirius’ mouth was sliding down over his cock and it was horrifically good, despite everything, despite the fact that this was his best mate who was sucking him. James kept his eyes on Remus, who was touching himself again, his hand moving fast, eyes half closed as he watched them both intently.
‘Here,’ hissed James, dragging Remus down next to him and kissing him desperately. James didn’t care about anything else any more, this was strangely perfect, even though if he’d ever tried to imagine this happening before he wouldn’t have included Sirius, somehow Sirius being there made it all the better. This way he could have someone sucking his cock, and still feel the tip of Remus’ cock against his side, jabbing into him as Remus touched himself. Fuck, it was good.
And fuck he wasn’t going to last much longer. ‘Moony, are you close?’
‘Mm,’ he whimpered, his hand getting faster, and James’ hip was already getting rather damp, and that certainly wasn’t helping him last longer. Especially not while listening to Remus’ moans and feeling him watching him, watching all over James’ body, especially watching Sirius’ very-pink lips as they slid up and down on James’ cock.
He slid his right hand round and covered Remus’ frantically moving hand with his own, wanting to help, wanting to feel it too. Remus moaned a little more and James turned to claim the kiss he’d been wanting again all this time, sliding his tongue in quickly and lapping deftly at Remus’ mouth.
James couldn’t imagine there was anything in the world more erotic than this; Sirius’ hot mouth and Remus’ beautiful, almost-naked body touching him, and he was starting to lose control now, and he was going to come, oh fuck, yes-
In the middle of James’ orgasm, still shooting come in to Sirius’ perfect mouth, Remus made a brief choking noise and James hip and hand were wet with Remus’ come and that just made everything even more perfect, oh fuck, oh.
He found himself quite unable to move, just lay there shaking and shuddering, and it took him a long time to come down. He was only very vaguely aware of Sirius leaning up to lick down his side and realised that he was probably licking Remus’ fingers too. Another surge of jealousy washed over him, but before it even had time to take hold Sirius was kissing him and sharing the taste, and James decided it wasn’t all that disgusting.
‘So you’re still completely straight, James?’ Remus asked slyly, as Sirius shoved them over so he could settle on Remus’ other side.
‘Yes.’
Sirius sniggered into Remus’ neck.
‘So you won’t be wanting to do this ever again then?’
James opened his mouth to say ‘of course not’ but the words wouldn’t form, being that it would have been a total lie if he had said it. He turned a little to wrap an arm around Remus’ narrow waist, letting his fingers gently tickle the skin on Remus’ hip. ‘Shut up.’