dangerous game
dangerous game
rap monster/suga - 502 words - sex mention
it’s a difficult thing to uphold.
it’s a dangerous game to play.
they were aware of this the moment they acknowledged each other’s feelings in the middle of their training period, when brushes along their fingers and lingering looks weren’t enough to sate them and the heavy feeling in their chests. it was easier then, to pretend they were working in the bangtan room, instead finding a short escape in each other’s lips and skin and anything that wouldn’t bring attention to them.
no bruises were allowed. no signs that they loved each other should be seen. that was what was established between them, when they had the space to fit love in between music and taking care of five other trainees- now their fellow groupmates.
the other members eventually noticed anyway. hoseok was the first to show it - giving a questioning look and an unfinished “are you two …” when yoongi and namjoon sat down together one day with music sheets spread around them, talking about anything that wasn’t each other. taehyung didn’t say much, in fact he might as well have been completely oblivious.
and jeongguk- oh god, poor jeongguk. it’s his role as the youngest to keep his hyungs’ secrets. he just keeps quiet, the only questions slipping out of his mouth being what a typical teenage boy would ask and the occasional “when will we get to debut?”
even the new trainees, jimin and seokjin, caught on. but they didn’t say anything. they felt like it wasn’t their right as the newbies.
yoongi and namjoon were all their seniors in the end. they all had to take on this game of dishonesty.
even now, they look at each other in secret - fanservice is a tempting thing, the occasional hug being the only act acceptable. it’s the newbies’ role to hide everything through false displays of affection and kind words so the fans can interpret something inaccurate. but they’re fine, jimin and seokjin. it’s for yoongi and namjoon.
they are all still winning.
it is harder now. what is absent on stage and on camera is made up by fleeting touches in the van away from the managers’ eyes and intimacy spent when everyone else isn’t home. yoongi does a good job with acting, and maybe namjoon finds it a little more difficult, but they manage.
"we’re okay," yoongi assures under the covers, letting his fingers slipping through the gaps of namjoon’s. namjoon repeats those words and fucks into him, slow and careful no matter how many times the elder insists he isn’t fragile, and yoongi wraps his legs around his waist until he arches fully into him with a gasp. they’ll be okay.
the next fanmeet, yoongi pretends he doesn’t even know namjoon is there until they’re urged into a hug. it’s half-assed, only part of what a full hug should be. but they linger knowingly for a second, and that’s all that’s allowed.
they’re still winning.
but it’s a hard game to play.