177 - Who has made you smile recently?
A lot of time I come home from work feeling a bit down. Whether it's the people I work with, or it's what we've been doing I always feel tired. I like the people I work with, they're all great people. Mostly. I even like Owen when most other people don't.
It's not that I don't smile during the day, but it's more often then not that I'm too busy concentrating to joke with anyone. I don't usually make small talk, and thats my fault I suppose. I could try harder. I should.
When I get home though, I flip on my own computer and I log on. I get online and when my buddylist appears, that's when I smile. Usually over just one name. TehMickster. I didn't know him from anywhere really. But that's what made it nice.
He made me laugh. He made me laugh even more then Jack made me laugh, and that was something. I always just felt better when he was there. Someone I could talk to who seemed to understand where I was coming from.
To be pushed away by everyone and everything. To be the odd person out.
To not be chosen.
So we never talked about that stuff. We kept it nice and fun, and I smile all the time. I know it's dangerous to meet him. I couldn't. I shouldn't.
I don't want to end up like Suzie.
But it's nice for now. Whoever he is, he makes me smile.
It's not that I don't smile during the day, but it's more often then not that I'm too busy concentrating to joke with anyone. I don't usually make small talk, and thats my fault I suppose. I could try harder. I should.
When I get home though, I flip on my own computer and I log on. I get online and when my buddylist appears, that's when I smile. Usually over just one name. TehMickster. I didn't know him from anywhere really. But that's what made it nice.
He made me laugh. He made me laugh even more then Jack made me laugh, and that was something. I always just felt better when he was there. Someone I could talk to who seemed to understand where I was coming from.
To be pushed away by everyone and everything. To be the odd person out.
To not be chosen.
So we never talked about that stuff. We kept it nice and fun, and I smile all the time. I know it's dangerous to meet him. I couldn't. I shouldn't.
I don't want to end up like Suzie.
But it's nice for now. Whoever he is, he makes me smile.