(no subject)
Vacation last week was amazing. Being in the city for a week just kind of sealed the deal, it felt like home which I haven’t felt in a very long time. However, someone I care about a great deal got me thinking. We were talking about bad break-ups and I said that I’d never had one. That is a lie. My first marriage destroyed everything I was before and ever since I have constantly set myself up to fail in relationships. If you never have expectations, you can never be disappointed. I’ve been content to settle. It’s easier to be miserable than to give yourself over to happiness and the risk of being hurt. This October, it will be five years since I left and I think I’m finally ready to stop hiding and give myself over to someone else again.