Idiot Neighbor & Sleep Deprivation...
Okay, the TLOL journals keeps giving me the message "page cannot be displayed". WHY?
I'm sooooooooo tired. I forget how little sleep you get with a baby. He's been VERY good, yet he woke up at 3 & I can't fall back asleep. I have issues with sleeping babies tho & I think that's part of it.
My neighbor that lives a few houses down is an idiot. (The reason I have so many "idiots" is because I live in low income housing if I haven't already said that. I did apply for Section 8 last week & the waiting list is only about 6 months. So hopefully I can find something in the summer.) She just turned 21. She has a 3 1/2 month old & a little boy that just turned 2.
Her parents were crackheads litterally. They had 5 kids, one about every 10-13 months. When she was 5 or so DFS took away the kids over finding drugs, needles, coke spilt all over the floor. Her mom then got pregnant right before going to prison & had her rights terminated to that baby immeadietly. Kids lived in the system, foster home to home. Of course they all got split up. Finally when she was a teenager she got adopted by a family. By then I'm sure the damage was done. She got pregnant right before she turned 17 & they kicked her out saying they wouldn't raise her & a baby. Boyfriend was a loser, ended up homeless at 8 months pregnant. Met someone else, he had her move in & seemed fairly nice. But it again sounded like a volatile relationship. He broke up with her last Nov/Dec. They got back together, found out she was pregnant, "assumed" it was his & didn't "remember" sleeping with anyone else. Baby turns a month old & a guy calls demanding a paternity test, boyfriend finds out & trips. They both get tested--- it's negative. So, now the child is fatherless with the wrong name of the certificate & the other option refuses to get tested.
Really, I don't think she was ever taught any form of life skills. I don't think she was ever taught the common sense & mothering skills that come natural to most people. She said it's been hard for her to bond with either of her children because when she was pregnant with the first she was convinced the state was going to take him because in her eyes that's normal & what happens.
She really hasn't worked since the baby was born. She went back for awhile, but then all the things happened with the baby, I'm sure she was depressed, didn't go for a week after the boyfriend left her & they fired her. She blew her last paycheck leaving her no money to get gas & go look for new jobs. She just doesn't seem to get the concept you HAVE to work when you have kids, etc.
So, needless to say she ran out of diapers awhile ago & was using receiving blankets as cloth diapers. Not good & caused rash. The two year old is the devil, he is HORRIBLE & now walks around naked all day due to NO diapers. I got some more diapers from someone that was giving them away, but now I've realized those are gone too.
She's been evicted from here, never left & now it's been turned over to the county attorney. Yet, she's lied to me & told me she's fine & everythings taken care of.
I've tried to help. I've got her job lists, applications, diapers, helped her sign up for heat assistance. Explained what she needs to do to not get evicted. Had her applied for cash assistance. Overall, it's helped a little but really at some point you realize helping someone is impossible if they don't want to be helped or aren't capable of grasping the concept.
Ty's brother is in town. Last night he wanted to go hang out & she happened to have a free babysitter that wanted her kids. So, we went bowling. It was a good night. Driving was impossible for him by the end of the night, so he decided he'd stay at Melissa's. Today we talked for a long time & he gave me the details of last night which left me shocked, I don't go to her house.
He stated that she slept on the couch & he slept in her bed. He said the bed was filthy, cracker crumbs in the bedding. Attempted to use the bathroom & the bathtub isn't draining & is absolutely disgusting. The toliet also wasn't working, many things floating in it. He plunged it & fixed it but it still had stains from the nasty water. Babies crib was dirty, no sheets on it, nasty blanket. He changed the blanket. Kitchen full of dirty dishes & moldy water in sink with lots of dirty dishes that have been there a long time he figured. He then said he awoke to the baby crying. He got up & got the baby & couldn't wake her up. Couldn't find any bottles or formula. Finally got her to wake up & she poured MILK into the bottle & insisted he didn't need his diaper changed. In the morning the 2 year old got up & said he was hungry. He told her to feed him. She didn't, said he could wait & went back to sleep. He then awoke to the 2 year old sitting on the floor eating a bag of carrots that had been laying on the floor for at least 24 hours.
He was appalled. He kept saying he doesn't understand why he finds a hot chick, who's clean, looks nice, is great & then sees she lives like that.
Today she came over & he ended up stopping by to see if I was going to go out with him tonight. He explained that if I'm not going to be his sister-in-law he'll just let me be his sister. She was here & I didn't really care if she went with him since he didn't want to go alone & Ty's being Ty to him too. The deal was she'd be back when the bars closed.
Needless to say she hasn't came back. I'm "assuming" they ended up staying at the motel where the bar is since he said he'd never go back to her house & I really don't think he should have drove after drinking & he didn't really want to go stay at Ty's. (He's NOT staying here, that's way too much drama.) But she could have called & told me this.
I have NO diapers for the baby & I'm sure a 3 month old she be changed after 10 hours minimuim. The 2 year old is pissed his mommy isn't here. I'm just waiting for my other neighbors who also have a baby to wake up in hopes that they have diapers left from their son. (Her parents have her kids, so I don't know if she'd have them or not.) My plan is to hopefully find diapers so I can give this kid a bath since he's in the same outfit he had on yesterday morning.
I know the right thing to do is call DFS. She LOVES her children, however, she's not doing a good job at this & these boys deserve more. BUT, I know without a doubt DFS was called 3 times between Thursday night & Friday, so they'll be here Monday & can see first hand what's going on. I haven't warned her so she won't be able to "look good" before they get here. I really don't want to see her lose her kids, but I would like them to force her to figure out her life, get a job, go to parenting classes, etc. The first time they were called was due to the fact that her child was outside naked SCREAMING in the freezing weather. In her defense, if she isn't in the room he can undo the bolt lock & just goes outside. Yet, there's ways to fix that. The second time was over the same thing & no diapers. The third time was over the fact she has no diapers, is stupid & will be evicted & homeless soon with nowhere to go. So, they have all the same complaints I'd give & they can see the condition of the house themselves. If they don't do anything I'll call myself, but I have a feeling they'll be doing something. There's too much already not to.
It's sad to see. And I have no clue when/if she'll be coming home. But, I guess I shouldn't complain. These kids are better off with me then her any day.
Alright, baby is fussing & I need to give him the binky & hopefully get some sleep before all four kids are awake & demanding shit.