Sleepy
Throughout most of my life, it was assumed by many (including me) that I had horrible insomnia. Sleeping pills help to a small degree, but since I've been using the Sleep Cycle app on my iPhone, I realized that throughout the night, I'm waking up a lot anyway, and I just don't remember.
Some people have told me to do this or that, or stop doing this or that. Try a glass of warm milk. Try a hot bath. Try not doing anything physical an hour or two before sleeping. Don't exercise before bed. Don't drink coffee. I've tried everything, and I still can't sleep.
About a year ago, I stumbled on a website that described something called 'Delayed Sleep Phase Syndrome (DSPS)'. It's a condition that exists naturally, and it's bumped my sleeping schedule off that of the rest of the 'normal' world.
A generic 'normal' sleep/wake cycle would mean the average human starts getting tired around 9-10pm, and goes to bed. They wake up around 6-7am. They eat lunch at noon or so, and have dinner around 5 or 6pm.
If left to my own devices, I will stay up all night, and sleep all day. If I have no obligations where I have to be anywhere at any given time (work, doc's appointments, etc), my schedule goes something like: get tired around 8-9am and go to bed. Sleep until 5pm. Have lunch at 11pm. Have dinner around 5am. And, the ironic thing is, if I keep to my natural schedule, I actually DO sleep. Like, a deep sleep.
It's fucked up, but it's a reality. No matter how exhausted I am, no matter how much sleep I've missed, no matter how I feel, once 9pm rolls around, I'm just a ball of fucking energy. 2am is my preferred time to clean the house, because I seem to get more done, I do it quicker, and I'm far more attentive.
After doing research for the last year, I've learned that it's impossible for some people to 'refit' their circadian rhythyms to that of the rest of the world. One theory is that if a person goes to bed at exactly the same time every night, and gets up at exactly the same time every morning, their body clock will 'reset' itself and the body will prefer that schedule.
I did it for eight straight years, and it didn't work. I had a list of vague ailments, and one savvy doctor finally put a finger on it - I was suffering the effects of sleep deprivation. I wasn't awake during the night, but I wasn't falling into a restorative sleep stage. My body wasn't healing itself, and I was fatigued.
Most doctors have very little training in sleep and sleep-related disorders, so it's hard to find one who'll be able to diagnose DSPS. They instantly jump all over the insomnia bandwagon, but they don't look any further than that.
What's happening to my body on a daily basis is that I'm 'waking up' and getting up just before my body clock is telling me it's time to go to bed. Since my body clock has been genetically programmed to sleep at certain times, right after I wake up, I have to deal with my body's natural response to sleep preparation: a decrease in brain activity, a decrease in blood pressure, greatly reduced digestive activity, and reduced metabolism, reduced body temperature. This results in a loss of energy, fatigue, lethargy, nausea, memory lapses, shivers/feeling cold, and difficulty concentrating. I was also falling asleep while driving, falling asleep at my desk, and falling asleep in meetings, even though I'd supposedly had a full eight hours of sleep the night before.
My body is genetically programmed to shut down around 9am. As a result, it's at its peak (brain activity, blood pressure, digestion, body temp and metabolism all increase) in the evening. It's very hard for some people to sleep in the middle of the afternoon (and I'm talking eight consecutive hours, not just a nap), but everyone else's 'middle of the afternoon' is my 'middle of the night'.
Someone once said it was like living with jet lag for the entirety of your life, with no adjustment.
It's hard for some people to grasp. They can't understand that if you went to bed and slept from 10pm to 6am, how the hell you could be tired the following day. What they don't understand is that I'm not sleeping for eight hours, I'm just dozing. If I take sleeping pills, I can get an hour or so of actual sleep (sometimes), but that's not enough. If I don't take the pills, I like in a half-awake, half-asleep state all night. I'm not moving or doing anything, but I'm still aware of what's going on around me, and I end up glancing at the clock every fifteen to thirty minutes. This counts as NO sleep, for the most part.
And, once 9am rolls around, I'm fucked. I shut down. I have no control over the process.
Of course, there are those extra-special, sensitive people out there who tell you to just 'get over it', or 'start sleeping during the night'.
And, you have the others, who, upon hearing that your body prefers to sleep during the day and stay awake at night, accuse you of being a party animal. "Oh, yeah, party all night and sleep all day. Must be nice." If reading, cleaning and doing laundry counts as partying, then yeah, I guess I'm just fucking wild and unruly.
Interestingly enough, the ADA (Americans with Disabilities Act) states that DSPS is an official disability, and that compensatory measures should be taken by workplaces and schools to accommodate it. There is no such act in Canada, unfortunately. There should be.
The theory behind this 'disorder' is the theory of evolution. It's been proven countless times that living species evolve to suit their environment. Tens of thousands of years ago, man discovered fire. Fire was good - you could use it for warmth, you could use it as a weapon or a defense mechanism, you could use it to cook food. Fire was very important, and it had become necessary for suvival. Problem was, way back then, there was no way to start a fire. Matches hadn't been invented. That meant that once you had a fire, you had to keep it going no matter what. That was easy during the daylight hours, when everyone was awake and active. But, during the night, when everyone was asleep, the fire would burn out. That meant that a small group had to stay awake during the night (contrary to everyone else's schedule), and one group evolved genetically to be predisposed to do that. They were called the 'fire keepers'.
In the last hundred years or so, technology has eliminated the need for anyone to stay awake to keep the fire going. Evolution, however, takes thousands of years (or longer), and we fire-keepers are still working on the old genetic clock. We've been genetically programmed to stay awake all night and sleep all day for thousands of years, and it's going to take a very long time for nature to reprogram that.
Part of the reason I want to work in the healthcare industry is that most who work in that industry try to avoid working nights, so 'graveyard' shifts can be plentiful, and the graveyard shift is exactly what would suit me best (not to mention that anyone who works the wee hours gets a shift premium of a dollar or two an hour more, so more money). And, in healthcare, night shifts are mandatory, since it's a 24/7 operation.
Nine to five is my enemy, I know that now. At this point, I'm stuck in that 'time zone', but I can dream of a future where I can work when it best suits me mentally and physically.
Some people have told me to do this or that, or stop doing this or that. Try a glass of warm milk. Try a hot bath. Try not doing anything physical an hour or two before sleeping. Don't exercise before bed. Don't drink coffee. I've tried everything, and I still can't sleep.
About a year ago, I stumbled on a website that described something called 'Delayed Sleep Phase Syndrome (DSPS)'. It's a condition that exists naturally, and it's bumped my sleeping schedule off that of the rest of the 'normal' world.
A generic 'normal' sleep/wake cycle would mean the average human starts getting tired around 9-10pm, and goes to bed. They wake up around 6-7am. They eat lunch at noon or so, and have dinner around 5 or 6pm.
If left to my own devices, I will stay up all night, and sleep all day. If I have no obligations where I have to be anywhere at any given time (work, doc's appointments, etc), my schedule goes something like: get tired around 8-9am and go to bed. Sleep until 5pm. Have lunch at 11pm. Have dinner around 5am. And, the ironic thing is, if I keep to my natural schedule, I actually DO sleep. Like, a deep sleep.
It's fucked up, but it's a reality. No matter how exhausted I am, no matter how much sleep I've missed, no matter how I feel, once 9pm rolls around, I'm just a ball of fucking energy. 2am is my preferred time to clean the house, because I seem to get more done, I do it quicker, and I'm far more attentive.
After doing research for the last year, I've learned that it's impossible for some people to 'refit' their circadian rhythyms to that of the rest of the world. One theory is that if a person goes to bed at exactly the same time every night, and gets up at exactly the same time every morning, their body clock will 'reset' itself and the body will prefer that schedule.
I did it for eight straight years, and it didn't work. I had a list of vague ailments, and one savvy doctor finally put a finger on it - I was suffering the effects of sleep deprivation. I wasn't awake during the night, but I wasn't falling into a restorative sleep stage. My body wasn't healing itself, and I was fatigued.
Most doctors have very little training in sleep and sleep-related disorders, so it's hard to find one who'll be able to diagnose DSPS. They instantly jump all over the insomnia bandwagon, but they don't look any further than that.
What's happening to my body on a daily basis is that I'm 'waking up' and getting up just before my body clock is telling me it's time to go to bed. Since my body clock has been genetically programmed to sleep at certain times, right after I wake up, I have to deal with my body's natural response to sleep preparation: a decrease in brain activity, a decrease in blood pressure, greatly reduced digestive activity, and reduced metabolism, reduced body temperature. This results in a loss of energy, fatigue, lethargy, nausea, memory lapses, shivers/feeling cold, and difficulty concentrating. I was also falling asleep while driving, falling asleep at my desk, and falling asleep in meetings, even though I'd supposedly had a full eight hours of sleep the night before.
My body is genetically programmed to shut down around 9am. As a result, it's at its peak (brain activity, blood pressure, digestion, body temp and metabolism all increase) in the evening. It's very hard for some people to sleep in the middle of the afternoon (and I'm talking eight consecutive hours, not just a nap), but everyone else's 'middle of the afternoon' is my 'middle of the night'.
Someone once said it was like living with jet lag for the entirety of your life, with no adjustment.
It's hard for some people to grasp. They can't understand that if you went to bed and slept from 10pm to 6am, how the hell you could be tired the following day. What they don't understand is that I'm not sleeping for eight hours, I'm just dozing. If I take sleeping pills, I can get an hour or so of actual sleep (sometimes), but that's not enough. If I don't take the pills, I like in a half-awake, half-asleep state all night. I'm not moving or doing anything, but I'm still aware of what's going on around me, and I end up glancing at the clock every fifteen to thirty minutes. This counts as NO sleep, for the most part.
And, once 9am rolls around, I'm fucked. I shut down. I have no control over the process.
Of course, there are those extra-special, sensitive people out there who tell you to just 'get over it', or 'start sleeping during the night'.
And, you have the others, who, upon hearing that your body prefers to sleep during the day and stay awake at night, accuse you of being a party animal. "Oh, yeah, party all night and sleep all day. Must be nice." If reading, cleaning and doing laundry counts as partying, then yeah, I guess I'm just fucking wild and unruly.
Interestingly enough, the ADA (Americans with Disabilities Act) states that DSPS is an official disability, and that compensatory measures should be taken by workplaces and schools to accommodate it. There is no such act in Canada, unfortunately. There should be.
The theory behind this 'disorder' is the theory of evolution. It's been proven countless times that living species evolve to suit their environment. Tens of thousands of years ago, man discovered fire. Fire was good - you could use it for warmth, you could use it as a weapon or a defense mechanism, you could use it to cook food. Fire was very important, and it had become necessary for suvival. Problem was, way back then, there was no way to start a fire. Matches hadn't been invented. That meant that once you had a fire, you had to keep it going no matter what. That was easy during the daylight hours, when everyone was awake and active. But, during the night, when everyone was asleep, the fire would burn out. That meant that a small group had to stay awake during the night (contrary to everyone else's schedule), and one group evolved genetically to be predisposed to do that. They were called the 'fire keepers'.
In the last hundred years or so, technology has eliminated the need for anyone to stay awake to keep the fire going. Evolution, however, takes thousands of years (or longer), and we fire-keepers are still working on the old genetic clock. We've been genetically programmed to stay awake all night and sleep all day for thousands of years, and it's going to take a very long time for nature to reprogram that.
Part of the reason I want to work in the healthcare industry is that most who work in that industry try to avoid working nights, so 'graveyard' shifts can be plentiful, and the graveyard shift is exactly what would suit me best (not to mention that anyone who works the wee hours gets a shift premium of a dollar or two an hour more, so more money). And, in healthcare, night shifts are mandatory, since it's a 24/7 operation.
Nine to five is my enemy, I know that now. At this point, I'm stuck in that 'time zone', but I can dream of a future where I can work when it best suits me mentally and physically.