Title : Fall for You
Fandom : Seventeen
Pairing : Joshua/DK, past!Joshua/Jeonghan
Length : 10.6k words
Summary : Vocal Group!AU. Jisoo finds himself fighting for the loud and cheerful boy harder than he could ever imagine.
A/N: I can't stop thinking about how C U T E Seokmin's and Jisoo's parts during Mansae, and decided to do something. By something I mean a 10k fic that was actually started with "Jisoo likes Seokmin's voice, and likes him just a little bit more". smh at me.
fall for you
Jisoo is on the way to the school's vocal practice room when his phone rings loudly, and he has to stop and puts his guitar case down because talking on the phone while bringing his soulmate in one hand is not something wise, at least for him.
"Yes, Jihoon, I'm on my way. Please wait a bit--"
"You are ten minutes late, Hong Jisoo. Don't use that tone to make me feel guilty, because it doesn't work this time."
"Okay, sorry. I'll get there as soon as possible."
"Better be, consider you're lucky because we can't start without you, but you know I can do things you don't want to see."
Jisoo smiles, so typical of Jihoon. He is the captain of their vocal group and the tiny-yet-tough boy is super strict when it comes to the rules, It sometimes drives everyone crazy, but he's doing it for the team and the result isn't bad - actually, it's good. They'd won several competitions and the biggest project is right in front of their eyes now: National Vocal Group Festival 2015. Their school has given Jihoon permission to compose his own group, and Jisoo is supposed to be there and play guitar for the compulsory song Jihoon had chosen the other day for audition requirement.
"I get it, Madam, I'll be there in five, no, three minutes."
Jisoo sighs as he shoves his phone down to his back pocket and picks his guitar case up. He doesn't aware someone is sprinting towards him and when Jisoo turns back, the guitar case he's holding hits that someone's knees hard enough for him to lose his balance and falls forward - more specifically, falls on Jisoo and his guitar case.
"Oh my god, I'm so sorry!"
Jisoo blinks, still too dazed to react at the tall, lanky boy who's busy muttering endless apologies at him. He looks unfamiliar, probably not someone from Jisoo's year. Jisoo studies his face features - almost too-short haircut, trenchant jawline that goes surprisingly well with his tiny eyes. Jisoo regrets it afterward, he's examined too much.
Realizing he hasn't replied to any of the boy's apologies, Jisoo quickly says "No, no, it's okay." as much as the boy does his apology, and things can't get more awkward from this. Or, that's what Jisoo is hoping for.
"I'm really sorry, sunbae, I didn't see you coming. I was in rush to the vocal practice room, I'm late for the audition." He explains, looking so panicked and Jisoo doesn't have a heart to tell him how vicious Jihoon is to people who come late, mainly on his team. And to be really honest, Jisoo does want to see this boy sing.
"I'm heading there, too. I can explain to Jihoon why were you late, so don't worry and just... uh, prepare yourself."
The glint on the other boy's eyes assures Jisoo that he just did something right.
"Great! Eighteen minutes late and you still walk like you're a model on a goddamn catwalk." Jihoon snaps impatiently as soon as Jisoo appears on the door. He glares at the taller boy, shifting his glance to see someone is walking behind Jisoo. "And who's that behind you?"
"He comes for audition," Jisoo replies, "and he was late because of me. He bumped into my guitar case and fell, I didn't see him because your threatening phone call was very much disturbing."
Jihoon slaps Jisoo's shoulder loudly, annoyed. "Late is late. Sorry, boy, but you can try again next time. I have enough participants inside." Jihoon nudges at the door with his head, "The only reason I can't start this audition on time was because this doofus decided to come late on this very important day."
Jisoo catches a very slight disappoint expression on the boy's face, and somehow it makes him wants to cry. The boy nods weakly without saying anyting and turns back, but Jisoo holds his arm firmly right before he walks away.
Unfortunately, Jisoo doesn't seem to understand what he's doing.
"Uh, sunbae?" the boy calls, utterly confused.
"Jisoo, what are you doing?" Jihoon raises an eyebrow, hands on his hip.
Blinking twice, Jisoo finally gets what's going on. He releases the hand on his grip with a loud cough to clear his throat and, after debating with his own mind for the last minute, saying, "Please let him try. Please."
Jisoo never begs. Like, never.
He's not that kind of stubborn kid who'll do anything to get what he wanted. He easily gives up, not wanting to pick a fight. But for some occassion, Jisoo knows he has to fight or he will lose the opportunity - for example, Justin Timberlake concert, his passion on music, and this adorable boy who wants to join the audition but Jihoon doesn't let him to.
Thankfully, Seungkwan, Jihoon's right-hand man, comes around to say they are still accepting participants. The more the merrier, Seungkwan says, and he winks knowingly at Jisoo. Seungkwan then asks the boy to come with him, and tells the other two to get ready.
Jihoon shoots Jisoo an intimidating look, but Jisoo just shrugs, grinning. He tails Jihoon to the center of the room, glances over to the boy who catches his eyes and smiles - all bright and tiny eyes disappear and Jisoo almost bumps his nose to Jihoon's head because holy shit.
Today will be a long day.
It takes approximately one and half hour for Jisoo to figure out the boy's name is Lee Seokmin, a freshman. His tiny eyes form two little crescents when he smiles, and he says he has always been wanted to be a singer from young age. He can reach high note and his voice is kind of similar with TVXQ's Changmin, he believes.
Jisoo strums his guitar carefully, trying not to be so obvious about his interest towards the kid. However, Seungkwan seems to know it - he keeps coughing near Jisoo whenever the boy says something and it makes him nervous, apparently, and then he will flash that bright smile, and Jisoo wants to kill Seungkwan right away.
"Let's see what you've got," Jihoon says, giving a clue to Jisoo to prepare his guitar. "You're given a chance to sing two songs; one is a song I choose, and you can sing whatever when we call you again later. Do you understand?"
"Yes," Seokmin answers, voice a little shaky from nervousness, but the glints on his eyes show determination. Jihoon nods and Jisoo starts playing the opening of the song.
The song Jihoon chooses for this audition is a little bit hard, actually. Wheesung's Love... That Cruel Disease isn't for everyone to sing, even Jihoon himself needed years of practice until he could reach each note correctly. But Jihoon decides that he needs to raise the standard for his group - a national competition is not easy to deal with.
When Seokmin starts singing, Jisoo and Jihoon lift their heads simultaneously as if they can't believe their ears. Actually, they don't. Seokmin's voice is smooth yet strong, a unique character that they both haven't heard for one and half hour being here. Seokmin expresses the words so well within his changing expressions, and it's almost perfect.
Almost, because his voice cracks at the very end high note, and he stops abruptly with face bright red, embarrassed.
"I-I'm so-sorry..."
"That's okay," Jisoo says, "isn't it, Jihoon?"
Jihoon shrugs, "Yeah, the song is finished anyway. You can take a break until we call you for round two."
Seokmin nods, quietly picking up his backpack and trudges out of the room.
Jisoo hugs his guitar, sighing. "He's almost perfect, isn't he?"
Jihoon nods without looking at his opponent. "Well, yes," he replies. "But almost is never enough."
After three hours, they finally manage to finish the first round. All of them are exhausted already, but Jihoon insists they should do this in one go. The rest have to agree to that, because Jisoo won't have much free time until his final exam and Jihoon only wants him and Seungkwan to be the judges along with him.
"I'll get something to drink," Jisoo gets up, stretching his tensed muscles. "Do you have an ice pack or something? I need a cold compress, my fingers hurt."
"The infirmary should have it, do you want me to get it for you, hyung?" Seungkwan offers. Jisoo shakes his head, patting Seungkwan's shoulder.
"No, I'll get it myself. Inform me when will the second round start, okay?"
Seungkwan nods, continuing to talk with Jihoon. Jisoo leaves the room and smiles to his juniors along the hallway, but he didn't see Seokmin. Jisoo shakes his head, this is getting irrational. He only met him today and he can't let himself be a stalker.
Jisoo hums to himself on his way to infirmary, and right in front of the door he hears something: a voice, that is definitely not his own. The voice is strangely familiar, and Jisoo finds himself unsurprised when he opens the door without hesitate to find Seokmin there.
Contrast with him, Seokmin is genuinely surprised, and he stumbles to make his way out when Jisoo stops him immediately.
"Hey, I'm not going to eat you," he states, hoping it's somewhat reassuring.
Seokmin sighs, puts his backpack back down. "I'm... not wanting to disturb whatever you're going to do, sunbae."
"You're here first. I should be the one saying that," Jisoo replies, walks casually to the small fridge on the corner of the room to pull out a small pack of ice. "By the way, what are you doing here?"
"I'm looking for a quiet place to practice," Seokmin says, eyeing Jisoo carefully. "Are you hurt, sunbae?"
"Yeah, a little. It happens often when I play for too long." Jisoo laughs. "About earlier... you don't have to worry. Jihoon isn't someone with narrow mind. He's been on this business for too long to be selfish."
Seokmin smiles, "Thank you, sunbae. I'm okay, I'll just try harder on the second round."
"Good luck," Jisoo smiles back, a bit more sincere than he has been planned.
The infirmary door being opened roughly from outside. Seokmin looks shocked at the sudden interruption but Jisoo just chuckles calmly - he knows exactly who's behind the door.
"Junghan?" he calls, and a pretty boy with long hair tied into a pony tail breaks into the room, hands cupping Jisoo's face worriedly.
"Jisoo, are you hurt somewhere? Did that grumpy pumpkin do this for you? I came to the vocal practice room looking for you but Seungkwan said you're here, and I went here running--"
"Junghan, breath. I'm fine, I only came here to get some ice for my hand. There's no something big."
The pretty boy sighs dramatically. "Are you done serving for Your Highness? Can you come home with me like, right now?"
Jisoo smiles apologetically, "Sorry, I can't. We don't have much time until finals week and Jihoon still needs to compose this team by the end of the week, so we have to finish this today. I'll go home with you next time, okay?"
Junghan nods reluctantly after a long pause. "Okay," he says. "don't get hurt, or your vocal group group won't have a captain anymore. I knew this was his doing."
Jisoo chuckles, "I understand," he promises.
Junghan looks over Jisoo's shoulder to see someone behind his back, and a smirk plays on his lips. "Oh, is this the kid?"
Jisoo frowns, "What kid?"
"You know," Junghan waves his hand in front of his face, "you don't have to hide it from me. Seungkwan told me what happened this afternoon before the audition started."
A jolt of realization hits Jisoo and before Junghan can say more, he quickly pushes the pretty boy out of the door. "I changed my mind. I can ride you home, now let's go!"
Seokmin blinks, unfazed. He looks up to meet Jisoo's eyes on the door when the latter calls his name, the elder smiles at him and tells him not to be late for the second round.
Jisoo's gone too fast to see how Seokmin's face gets red and warm by his words.
The second round goes faster than the first, it's already on half way the time Jisoo gets back to the room. "Some participants dropped out," Jisoo hears Jihoon whispers, irritation written clear on his voice. "They said they couldn't sing anymore. Hah! And they thought they would make it to the team that easy? I have standard, you stupid spoiled crybabies!"
"I get it, I get it, calm down," Jisoo shushes him, Jihoon is whispering but his voice is loud enough to be heard by the other participants outside. "Isn't that make your work easier? The people who stay are they who think can match to your standard. What you have to do now is open your eyes and ears so you won't make wrong decision."
"You're right," Jihoon takes a deep breath, "Take Seungkwan's place for the guitar. Next is Lee Seokmin's turn."
Seokmin chooses another Wheesung's song for the second round, and for Jisoo Heart Aching Story is not any easier than the previous song.
"Are you sure you're going with this song?" Jihoon asks, he's doubting as much as Jisoo does. "You do know we don't judge based on the songs chosen, don't you?"
Seokmin nods firmly. "Yes, I know, I prepared for this song and I'm sure I can do it."
Jihoon shrugs, "If you say so," he decides. "I'll give you a sign when you have to stop. You may start now."
Jisoo tries to focus on the music sheets in front of him, but it's kind of hard when Seokmin's voice fills the room and Jisoo feels so, so warm and secure even with the fact that Seokmin is singing a sad song. Seokmin's voice is soothing, like a warm breeze on summer, something that can linger in your ear without making you tired of it.
When Seokmin leaves the room after he bows down politely to everyone, Jisoo is an inch away from throwing his guitar soulmate aside to chase on him.
Seokmin stares at him, probably confused on Jisoo's weird act even since the first time they met. But he just waits patiently until the elder is able to catch his breath and mutter, "Are you free this Saturday? We'll going to have a wrap up party, and you're invited."
Seokmin frowns, "How about the other sunbaes?"
"I don't care," Jisoo replies, still out of breath, "I invited you. They don't have anything to do with you. So, will you come?"
Seokmin bites his lower lip, hesitant, but he nods anyway. "I guess it's only fair if I passed the audition?"
Jisoo looks up, smiling. What a smart kid.
Seokmin got accepted to the group by the end of the week.
Seungkwan and Jihoon told Jisoo first about it, gave him endless glances that Jisoo couldn't understand the purpose. He's still happy for Seokmin, though, and seems like his friend get it without him saying out loud.
"I'm not usually trust your instinct, but I'll admit this one you did well. Seokmin is a nice addition for my team, he has a strong character that I'm looking for. Congratulation, your boy now have a brighter future under my wing."
"He's not my boy," Jisoo protests, "I invited him for the wrap up party tonight, I hope you won't mind."
"And you said he isn't your boy," Seungkwan giggles. "Everyone is invited, besides he's now part of the family so he has to join us. I have his phone number, want to set the time for the date?"
Jihoon almost chokes on his orange juice. "Very smooth, Seungkwannie."
"You know I always do my best, Jihoon hyung," Seungkwan winks at Jihoon, then shifts his glance back to Jisoo again. "Hyung, I'm asking you a question. Do you want it or not?"
Jisoo looks hesitate, "Do I have to? Are you two planning something on me?"
Jihoon shakes his head. "Why are you suspecting us? You invited him first, it's just normal to pick him up. It's called manners, Jisoo darling, manners."
"I hate you both," Jisoo mutters under his breath. "Give me his number."
Seungkwan cheers happily as he scrolls on his phone and shoves the contact in front of Jisoo's face. "Tell me," he whispers in serious face, "is he going to replace Junghan hyung's place in your heart?"
"Don't talk about Junghan like that." Jisoo deadpans.
"Wow, chill, man, I was just asking," Seungkwan raises up his arms in surrender. "Just, you know. Seokmin is a good kid. You're a good guy. Junghan hyung is also a good guy, but maybe you'd better off with him to have a more adventurous life."
Jisoo rolls his eyes. "You're talking to the wrong side. That was what Junghan had always said on the first two weeks after we broke up. I had a hard time to deal with my own feelings, please don't drag him or Seokmin or anyone else in."
"Jisoo hyung is right, you're crossing the line. If he wants to date that Seokmin guy, he has the right to do that without even telling us." Jihoon pipes up. "Now, let's go and let him call Seokmin in peace."
Jisoo sighs in relief when Seungkwan follows Jihoon half-heartedly, that kid sure has a lot to say about his love life. But Jisoo isn't in the mood to talk about it, and probably he won't ever get the mood.
Staring at the series of numbers on his phone, Jisoo decides that maybe, just maybe, calling Seokmin once won't cause a big of a deal. He presses the call button and waits - it only takes two seconds before his call gets answered.
"Yes, Jisoo sunbae?"
Jisoo raises an eyebrow. "You'd saved my number?"
Seokmin laughs softly, a voice Jisoo wants to hear over and over again. "Actually I saved everyone's number, just in case if I need anything."
"Ah, sure," Jisoo can feel a jab of slight disappoinment on his chest. "Um, I called to remind you about the wrap up party. It's tonight, you're going, right?"
"Yes, I'm going. Ah, now that you mention it, I still don't know the place and time yet. Should I call Jihoon sunbae to ask for details?"
"Well, uh, no need to do that. Text me your address, I'll pick you up."
A pause. Jisoo bites his lower lip anxiously, did he say something wrong? He tries to recall the words he said when Seokmin asks, "Are you sure you're okay with that, sunbae?"
"Of course?" Jisoo answers it as a question, because Seokmin's question itself sounds too rhetorical. "I mean, I invited you days before, so I should be responsible of it. And it's not a bother, if that's what you're worried of."
Another pause, but this time it's shorter. Jisoo almost gushes into the air like a volcano when Seokmin agrees and he'll send him his address right away.
He's never felt this excited for months.
Seokmin only wears a simple white buttoned shirt under a black jacket and a pair of jeans, yet he looks so damn attractive in Jisoo's eyes. He's not as fashionable as Junghan who dedicates half of his life to always look pretty (the other half is the fact that he was born pretty), but this is more than enough. Especially for Jisoo whose heart suddenly beats so fast like he's doing marathon.
"Did you wait long, sunbae?" Seokmin asks, flashing that billion dollar smile of his.
"No, I just arrived," Jisoo replies, clearing his throat. "And... uh, you look great."
"Thank you, you too."
An awkward silent outspreads, but seems like Seokmin is better at handling this situation than Jisoo himself.
"So... should we be going now, sunbae?"
"Ah, yes, sure."
What Jisoo doesn't expect to hear when he's arrived in the karaoke place Jihoon has reserved is his friends asking why is he not with Junghan, but with someone else. Moreover, someone they aren't familiar yet. Jisoo knows his friends are aware that he and Junghan have broken up, but they also know how Jisoo still cares a lot about the pretty boy - too much to leave him for someone new this fast.
Jisoo realises how uncomfortable Seokmin is, but the younger doesn't say anything. He keeps smiling and thanking everyone who congratulates him for making it to the group, he later joins with Seungkwan and some other boys from his year. Jisoo takes a seat beside Jihoon, sighing exasperatedly.
"You should've told me these shitheads are here and they're gonna ask me about Junghan."
Jihoon shoots him a look, shrugging. "How would I know?"
"Of course you would know. You're probably the closest person other than Junghan that I've ever had in my whole high school years, but you're too sarcastic to be more than a friend."
Jihoon cackles at that. "You're saying that if I were gentler, I'd have the opportunity to be your boyfriend?"
Jisoo presses his lips into a thin line. "Actually, forget it. I don't want to have a boyfriend that can't even call me hyung because his pride is far too high for that."
Jihoon laughs again, louder. "I don't call you hyung because we're much closer than that, you're like my own brother. Brothers don't speak with formality, do they?"
Jisoo takes a deep breath, "Yeah," he says, moving himself a bit on the soft couch. "Hey, what do you think about him?"
"Him? Do you mean Seokmin?"
Jisoo nods. "I just want a honest thought. Not a comparison between him and Junghan."
Jihoon scrunches his nose, thinking. "Well, it's a little bit hard to say about him, since he was around for like, less than a week? But he's a nice and polite kid, and what I like the most about him is he has commitment and he's willing to take responsibility for what he did. Also, I like his voice. I may give him more lines than Seungkwan when he first joined us."
"Here we go again with the mean captain..." Jisoo rolls his eyes.
"Hey! I'm a considerate person!" Jihoon complains, laughing. "I don't want to open your old wound, but I have to say I'm happy to see you like this again after Junghan hyung."
"Like this?" Jisoo repeats, unsure.
"Yeah, you look happier these days. Also, you care about him the way I know you do to Junghan hyung. You're always a caring type, but you know what I mean. It's just... different."
"Seokmin and Junghan are not the same..." Jisoo mutters quietly.
"I know, I can't see any similarities between the two of them either. But it's not the person who stays, but the way they linger in your heart."
Jisoo blinks at Jihoon, can't believe the tough boy can say something like that. He smiles wide, patting Jihoon's shoulder. "You're my brother for a reason, huh?"
He diverts his eyes across the room to meet Seokmin's, and the younger boy smiles at him.
His heart blooms with warmness.
Junghan appears on the party an hour later, when Seokmin and his friends are singing Koyote's song. Everyone's eyes are suddenly on Jisoo, even Seokmin. The atmosphere is weird, but Jisoo doesn't think it will last long. This is Junghan, anyway.
"Why are you looking at me like you just saw a ghost?" Junghan raises an eyebrow in annoyance. Jisoo giggles, just as he has expected. "Come on guys, you're here to have fun. Just ignore me, I'm here to see Jisoo, not all of you."
"Is there something wrong?" Jisoo asks as Junghan takes a seat beside him.
"Yes, there's this weird pervert who desperately wants to get into my pants and he's so obvious as hell, he even followed me to the beauty class only to stare at my ass on the whole meeting," Junghan rolls his eyes, "He calls himself Scoops or something."
Jisoo laughs, "So? You're here to ask me to kick his ass?"
A little smile tugs the corner of Junghan's mouth, before he laughs out loud. "I'm kidding. I can deal with that person myself, so you don't have to worry. I'm here to book you for next month, I have an important event to attend but I can't come alone, obviously. I mean to tell you on the phone, but I know you're in a place like this and I need to make sure you won't forget."
"Wait, why me?" Jisoo frowns, "I'm sure people from your beauty class can help you with this."
"None of them looks good beside me," Junghan whines. "Except that Scoops guy, if you want to count him in. But being with him for more than five minutes already gives me lots of headache, so, no, thank you. Can you please do it for me?"
Jisoo hums, he doesn't know what plan he has for next month, but he can't turn down Junghan's request either. So he just nods simply after thinking for a while, everything behind that can follow. Something important to Junghan is somehow still important for him, too.
Junghan squeals happily, squeezing Jisoo's face with his palms. "Thank you Jisoo, you're the best. I'll give you whatever you want in return."
Hearing that, Jisoo's eyes automatically go to Seokmin, singing and laughing happily with his friends - even Jihoon is there too. Junghan notices his eyes and smiles, he understands.
"I don't think I'm a good ex-boyfriend, but I'll try my best not to ruin your reputation in front of that kid," Junghan says, giggling. "But really, Jisoo. All I ever wanted is to see you happy. And I mean it."
Junghan sounds so honest and Jisoo has to fight an urge to pull him into a hug and cry on his shoulder. Junghan has always been a best friend, and he'd always be.
"I wish the same for you," Jisoo replies, "thank you, Junghan. For everything."
"No need to go all sappy on me," Junghan laughs. "Just promise me you won't forget our appointment next month, okay? I'm going then, this place is so damn noisy and I can't be here any longer."
"Want me to ride you home?" Jisoo offers, but Junghan shakes his head.
"Save your ride for the boy," he winks at Jisoo, leaning down to peck on his right cheek. "I think the grumpy pumpkin and his minions are high right now, they won't even realise I'm not here anymore. Send them my greeting?"
Jisoo nods, "Sure."
Junghan smiles and disappears behind the door within a minute. Jisoo takes a deep breath, turning his head around to see Seokmin stands beside him, holding two glasses of cola.
"Drink, sunbae?"
"Oh, yeah, thanks," Jisoo says, patting the space beside him on the couch. "Do you wanna sit?"
Seokmin looks hesitant at first, but he still does. He hands Jisoo one and drinks the other before asking him, "That was Junghan sunbae, right?"
Jisoo nods, sipping on his drink slowly. "Yes, that was Junghan."
"Someone who you should be coming here with?" asks Seokmin.
Jisoo frowns at the boy beside him. "You must've been thinking about what my friends said earlier. It was a joke, they were teasing me. Junghan was my boyfriend, all my friends knew it. But now we've broken up, and they also knew it."
Sungmin glances down at his hand, playing with his long, slender fingers. "It doesn't seem like you two are ex-boyfriends. I mean, well, you two are so close? I remembered seeing him on infirmary when I practiced for audition and he looked so worried about you."
"Ah, yes, he was there. Seungkwan told him stupid things and he believed right away, sorry you got to see something like that." Jisoo laughs a little. "We're best friends long before we're boyfriends. After we broke up, he's still my best friend, People assume we're still not over each other, but I know he doesn't feel that way."
Seokmin bites his lower lip, "Perhaps... you are still not over him?"
Jisoo shakes his head, "No, I don't think it's the problem," he says. "I do care about him a lot, and sometimes it does make me confused, but we don't see each other the way we did. Not anymore."
The younger boy nods his head thoughtfully. "You're amazing, sunbae. Moving on is not an easy thing for most people."
Jisoo shoots him a look, but Seokmin just laughs. His laugh is apparently contagious, and Jisoo finds himself smiling.
"Enough mocking me. Why don't you sing instead? You will be singing for hours starts on Monday, you'll need to prepare your throat."
"Good idea," says Seokmin, "what song should I sing?"
"And why are you asking me?"
"Because you asked me to sing," Seokmin rolls his eyes. "Come on, pick a song."
"Uh, Roy Kim's Home?"
Seokmin smirks, "You're so melancholic. But I like that song, it's not bad. Watch out, I might make you cry."
(That day, Jisoo decides that he likes Seokmin's voice.)
On the next practice, Jisoo is already on stand by ten minutes before everyone else because he has fewer classes than others - the perks of being a senior. He's strumming his guitar quietly when someone abruptly breaks in to the room, startling him.
"Oh God, I thought I was late."
It's a voice Jisoo knows very well; a voice that he likes. Seokmin's voice.
"No, you're early. Everyone is still on their class, Jihoon has texted me to postpone the practice by thirty minutes. He'll be here soon."
"I see," Seokmin pulls a chair to sit in front of Jisoo, still trying to regain his breath. "For a senior, you do have a lot of spare time."
Jisoo shrugs, "Being a senior is not that bad. You'll see in two years." He pauses, looking at Seokmin with an eyebrow raised. "I thought you're a shy and calm guy. I guess I was wrong."
"No one ever said I was a shy and calm guy," Seokmin laughs, "I don't talk much on first meetings, though. I want to be comfortable around people who make me comfortable too. I have a bright personality, and when I get excited sometimes I'm having a hard time to stop talking."
"Like now?" Jisoo teases.
"I regret everything I've said." Seokmin replies.
Jisoo grins widely, Seokmin's reaction is cute. "Since you're here now, warm up your throat first. Jihoon is merciless on practices and he won't tolerate any mistakes, so you better not disappointing him."
"Okay," Seokmin says easily, stands up to walk to the corner of the room - he must be looking for quiet place, Jisoo remembers it.
"Sunbae?" Seokmin calls him from where he's standing now.
Jisoo looks up from his guitar, "Yes?"
"Thank you, for giving me a chance." Seokmin smiles, and Jisoo's world gets a million watt brighter. "I won't disappoint Jihoon sunbae, and you as well. I promise."
("Hyung, did you see what I see?" Seungkwan asks, whispering to Jihoon's ear when they take a little break after cleaning up the place.
"What, Jisoo staring like an idiot at Seokmin the whole practice? Of course, that guy was obvious as hell."
"Hyung," says Seungkwan impatiently, "what does that mean?"
"That means we should let him be that way, kid. Jisoo is happy, as a friend, isn't it our duty to support him?"
"Yes, but--"
"But what?"
"But doesn't that mean Jisoo hyung has really fallen for him?"
Jihoon shrugs, "Well, leave it to him to answer that.")
And since that day, Jisoo finds himself staring in awe at the loud and cheerful boys in between his practices. Sometimes it takes a little too long (because Seokmin doesn't notice it fast enough), a little too much (just because Jisoo can), and a little too often (because Jisoo gets too attached with this leisure activity - no matter how embarrassed it sounds).
(Seokmin sings Gondry on practice today. Jisoo melts under his soft voice like an ice in a hot summer day.)
Let's just stay quiet, like staying under warm blankets
If the sunlight covers us, it'll melt
Jisoo wakes up to a white ceiling that doesn't belong to his room, with a bed as hard as a rock that hurts his spine, and he can't move his arms nor legs. Seokmin's voice when he sang Gondry at the group vocal pratice resounds on his ears, and is also the last thing he could remember. Wait, wasn't that only happened yesterday?
No, a nurse says to him when she's injecting medicines into his drip, you had an accident three days ago and been unconscious since then. Your motorcycle hit a truck when you're trying to avoid another vehicle.
"Do my parents know about this?" Jisoo asks cautiously.
"Yes, the witness of the accident found your phone and quickly called your friends, as they were on the recent call list. Your friends called your parents and they said they'd be here tomorrow."
Thirteen hours flight from United States, Jisoo thinks. His dad is going to kill him for being so reckless on the road, probably taking his driving license and putting him under house arrest for months until he could pay for the damage.
"One of your friends stayed here for three days straight," the nurse adds, "he only went home last night to take your things, and probably to change his clothes too. He's been wearing the same uniform for too long so it must've been uncomfortable."
Is it Jihoon? But Jihoon hates hospitals, no exception even to his best friends or parents. Is it Seungkwan? But they are not that close - Seungkwan is close with him because he's closer to Jihoon, and they are like a complete package. But still, it's possible for him to stay with Jihoon's command since Seungkwan can never say no to whatever Jihoon says. Or is it Junghan? He's the most possible candidate, but he's been really busy with his beauty class these days. Jisoo has no other person to be counted as friend, and he realises just how miserable his life is.
Wait, Jisoo stills, there's someone else.
"The friend that stayed here... do you know his name?"
"Ah, I didn't ask him. But he was here everyday so I recognise his face, he's tall and has nice eyesmile when he smiles. He's so cute."
Seokmin.
"Is there anything you need, Mr. Hong?"
"No, thank you."
Jisoo shuts his eyes tightly after the nurse leaves his room, trying to collect his memory of the accident. He can't remember anything other than he was going back home after practice that day, wondering why the roads were unusually crowd. Ah, he remembers Seokmin's voice too, and his intention to ask the younger his favorite musician, so he can buy him a CD. He remembers he wanted to hear Seokmin's voice more often, he wanted Seokmin to keep singing. And he wanted to tell him that the next day.
So I end up like this? Jisoo sighs. What will Mom and Dad say to me?
The sound of someone pushes the door open corrupts Jisoo's mind. His eyes widen in surprise to see Seokmin in a T-Shirt and jeans and a pair of sneakers. He doesn't look like someone who drops by before going to school.
"I don't go to school today," Seokmin answers Jisoo's thought immediately (he doesn't remember saying it out loud), taking a seat on a chair beside Jisoo's bed. "The school gives us a special day off, since the competition is getting closer and the practices are getting crazier. I woke up losing my voice yesterday."
"Don't push yourself too hard," Jisoo reminds him.
"The competition is very important, so we're doing our best. Don't worry, we know our limits. And you," Seokmin pauses, frowning at Jisoo. "Stop worrying about people. Now is our turn to worry about you."
"I'm really sorry," Jisoo says guiltily, "I must've caused a chaos for all of you."
Seokmin shrugs, "That's not a big deal, it's a relief that you're okay. The doctors won't say anything to us, but I can get the nurses to give me a little hint. They say you'll be discharged in a few days, after the wound on your wrist completely healed."
Jisoo can't help but laugh, "What did you do to those nurses? They seem to like you very much."
"I didn't do anything!" Seokmin laughs, his eyes crinkle to match the wide smile on his lips. "Well, we did talk a lot. I got bored easily because I had no one to talk to, so I was kinda happy when the nurses were here. They quickly recognised my face because I've never left for three days straight, and believe it or not, they talked about us on the front desk. Those people, really."
The smile on Jisoo's face slowly fades. "About that..." he starts, "I need to know why did you want to stay here, when my parents didn't even move until the fourth day I'm hospitalized."
Seokmin looks taken aback by the question, his wide smile is replaced by a little, sadder one. "I was really worried when someone called Jihoon sunbae's phone to inform us that you were brought to the hospital after an accident. We quickly ran to the hospital, and seeing you lying unconscious was really... painful to me. Then I heard Jihoon sunbae couldn't get in contact with your parents, and no one was able to stay beside you, so I volunteered. The nurses and doctors didn't let me in at first, but we convinced them so I could stay."
The younger takes a deep breath before continuing, "I didn't leave because I was afraid something might happen when I wasn't there. I don't want to lose someone who's important to me, not again."
There's a lot of things Jisoo wants to ask, but he just takes Seokmin's hand and laces their fingers gently. Seokmin looks up, and when their eyes meet Jisoo feels like his heart is going to explode. As usual.
"Thank you," he whispers. "Thank you so much."
(You're just as important to me, Jisoo wants to say, but he doesn't. He will let Seokmin know a little later.)
"When Jihoon sunbae and I went to your house yesterday, I kinda robbed it when he asked me to "pick important things". You have too much stuffs for someone who lives alone."
Jisoo grins, "I have to prepare for the worst."
"Oh, and when will your parents come?"
"Tomorrow, why?"
"Nothing," Seokmin shakes his head. "I just think to cook them something, since the hospital only gives you two sets of food every day."
My parents only eat Western food from a five stars chef they know so well, Jisoo says to himself. But the sparkle on Seokmin's eyes is beautiful and he doesn't want it to disappear.
"Do you have a suggestion? What do they like?"
"Just cook whatever, I'm not sure if they like something specific. But... thank you, I can't believe you're also thinking about my parents."
"Parents are important, you know," says Seokmin, "you sound really unsure. What kind of son doesn't know his parents' favorite food?"
"Well, maybe because they have too little time for me to even know their favorite food? I bet they also don't know mine. We're living too far to be called parents and son, I'm surprised they are still going here to see me."
"I understand," Seokmin nods. "Is this why you often look so distant? I mean, sure, you have friends, but even when you're with your friends, you look lonely."
Jisoo can't help but smirk, "You notice that much about me?"
Seokmin rolls his eyes. "No, that's the result I get from my friends' research. They were observing you for months, and it was not an easy task, they said. You're like an open book with invisible ink. Only them who has enough patient can read you thoroughly, but even people who meet you once on the street can make a conclusion about what kind of person you are."
"They were observing... me?"
Seokmin laughs at Jisoo's genuine shock. "I don't know if you're trying to be humble or you really don't know, but Jihoon sunbae's group is the most popular group ever existed in our school. This kind of research is normal, all of my friends have done this at least once."
Jisoo can feel his temple throbs at Seokmin's explanation. "You guys are terrible."
"That's called youth spirit, sunbae."
Jisoo's parents arrive sometime around midnight.
Jisoo fights off his sleep to see his parents' identical annoyed looks - they are anything but worried and Jisoo is so used to it. His parents think everything was his fault, and being hospitalized is such a waste of money.
"We talked to the doctor earlier," his mother says, not even bothering to sit beside him. "You hurt your hands pretty bad and there's a probability of you can't use them properly even after the wounds are healed."
"And the probability is high," his father adds. "You know what that means? It means you can't play your guitar anymore. Are you happy, now? You're stupid enough to go against your parents' will, and this is what you got. What are you going to do with those broken hands of yours?"
"If only you agreed to go with us to the States and study architecture..." his mother sighs, "You're so stubborn. Are you still going to be a rock head even after this accident?"
"You don't understand..." Jisoo grits his teeth, "You never understand anything!"
"Watch your tone, young man." His mother holds up a hand. "You should be grateful we're taking some time to come here."
"Don't do it if you don't want to!" Jisoo yells, tears pricking on the corner of his eyes. Always like this, it was always like this. And it hurts every time. "If you're here after spending your time and money only to tell me that I can't continue pursuing my dream, okay, I get it. You can go back to America now, and pretend that nothing was happened!"
"Hong Jisoo!"
"Please..." a cracked sob slips out Jisoo's lips, he's hurt hurt hurt, and he doesn't want his parents to see how broken he is right now. "Please leave me alone... I can take care of myself, I'll pay the hospital bill, so please leave..."
His mother looks surprised with his words, and his father doesn't say anything. Jisoo closes his eyes to stop his tears from falling, but they keep running down his face, leaving cold path on his cheeks. He hears his father takes a deep breath after a long pause and says, "Our flight is in the morning. You may not be able to see us again in a few hours."
"Don't say like this is my first time," Jisoo replies weakly. "Thank you for coming, Mother, Father. Have a safe flight."
3:05 AM.
Jisoo reaches his phone and calls the first name he sees on recent call, and needs three seconds to realize he's calling Seokmin. He's just about to hang up when Seokmin answers, his voice is too bright for someone who is supposed to be asleep at this hour.
"Sunbae? Why are you calling?"
"Uh... are you asleep?"
"No, I can't sleep," Seokmin says, chuckling softly. "I was hoping for someone to magically up and call me so I can talk to them, so... thank you for calling? And what's wrong?"
"Seokmin, I..." Jisoo inhales deeply and continues, "I'll come over in ten minutes."
Sneaking out of the hospital at three in the morning isn't as hard as it sounds. The hospital is practically dead at this hour, and no one around is sober enough to question a boy wearing ugly pajama and a jacket with hoodie. Fifteen minutes in a cab feels like days for Jisoo, as he clutches on his phone like he makes sure Seokmin is not going anywhere.
The fact is, Seokmin not going anywhere. He sits on the porch, quickly runs to open the gate when a cab stops in front of his house.
"Sunbae, what's wrong--"
Before Seokmin can finish his sentence, Jisoo throws himself to Seokmin's body, buries his face on the younger's neck. Seokmin gasps, surprised, but he lets Jisoo's trembling hands grip on the front of his shirt tightly. He awkwardly lifts a hand up and pats Jisoo's back, the gesture slowly grows more comforting and Seokmin shifts to hold Jisoo completely on his arms.
"They said I couldn't use my hand properly again," Jisoo whispers, tears start brimming on his eyes. "They said I couldn't play guitar anymore. My father said I was stupid, my mother was disappointed. I- I hate myself for being like this, but really- those words... were hurt..."
Seokmin hugs Jisoo tighter when Jisoo finally cries on his shoulder and let his tears spill on his shirt. "It's okay," he says, quietly. "It's okay, everything is going to be okay,"
(And Jisoo believes him.)
part 2