sometimes i'd be better off just shutting the hell up
so this morning i'm on my way to a job interview for some molly maid position...and i'm hungover and i'm hungry and broke and in a terrible mood. i'm at eglinton station scanning the ground for change so i could get a coffee and this fuckin douchebag gangster is checking me out. usually, i'd just smile and take it as a complement...but this dude
( Read more... )
Shit on a stick!
Why do niggers always have sex on their minds?
Because they have pubes on their heads!
What does Pontiac stand for?
Poor Old Nigger Thinks It's A Cadillac!
Did you hear the one about the baby nigger who went to heaven and got his wings?
He said, "God! Look! I'm an angel!", and God said, "No you stupid nigger! You're a bat, now eff off!"
I like black people . . .
. . I used to have some black friends 'till my dad sold them!
What does a nigress and an ice hockey player have in common?
They both change their pads after 3 periods!
Why do blacks have white hands and feet?
They were on all fours when God spray painted them!
Why do black people have white hands?
Everyone has some good in them!
Why do black people have white hands?
It rubs off the cop cars!
Why do more niggers get hit by cars in the winter?
They're easier to spot!
What do you call two blacks on one bike?
Organized crime!
Why are niggers getting stronger?
T.V.s are getting bigger!
What happened to the nigger who had an abortion?
Crime Stoppers sent her a check for $500!
Why don't nigger bitches wear panties to picnics?
To keep the flies away from the chicken!
What's the difference between a truck full of baby niggers and a truck full of bowling balls?
You can't unload a truck full of bowling balls with a pitchfork!
What does FUBU stand for?
Farmers Used to Buy Us
What does FUBU stand for?
Farmers Used to Beat Us
Why don't sharks eat niggers?
They think its whale shit!
Why do niggers call white people "honkies"?
That's the last sound they hear before they get hit!
What do they do with dead niggers in California?
Gut them to make wetsuits!
Why does L.A. have so many fags and N.Y. so many niggers?
L.A. had first choice!
What do you call a Chinese nigger with AIDS?
Coon Die Soon!
What does NAACP stand for?
Niggers Against All Caucasian People
What does NAACP stand for?
Now Apes Are Called People
Why did God give niggers big dicks?
As a way to say "sorry" for putting pubes on their heads!
Why do niggers wear wide brimmed hats?
So birds won't shit on their lips!
Why was white chocolate invented?
So nigger kids could get messy too!
What do you call a niggers car?
A 'blood vessel'.
What do you call 1,000 niggers going down a hill?
A mudslide!
What do Nikes and the KKK have in common?
They both make niggers run fast!
Why is there no black Miss America pageant?
Nobody wants to be Ms. Idaho!
What do you get when you cross a nigger and a gorilla?
A dumb gorilla!
What do you call a nigger having sex?
Rape!
How many Pollocks does it take to clean a bathroom?
None, it's a niggers job!
White folks aren't racist . .
. . we've all got colored TV's!
Why do niggers hate aspirin?
Because it's white and it works!
A nigger walks into a bar and says, "Yo! Where do all the homies hang?"
The bartender says, "out there", pointing to a tree in the back.
What do you call an Ethiopian on a hunger strike?
An Ethiopian!
Reply
It depends how thin you slice them!
How do you get a nigger out of a tree?
Cut the rope!
Why don't nigger babies play in sandboxes?
Cats keep trying to bury them!
What do you call 60,000 niggers on a plane heading back to Africa?
A good start!
What do you call a nigger hiding in the woods?
A brown recluse!
What do you call a black bowling ball?
A nigger egg.
What did God say when he made the first nigger?
Oops! I put the pubes on his head!
What was missing from the Million Man March?
About a thousand miles of chain and an auctioneer!
What do Confederates do on the New Year?
Shoot niggers with roman candles and throw Confetti!
How do you get a nigger to wear a condom?
Put a Nike logo on it!
How do you keep a nigger bitch pleased?
Give her some fried chicken!
What happened when the Nigger looked up his family tree?
A gorilla shit on his face!
What do you call a busload of niggers going off a cliff with one empty seat?
A crying shame!
What do you call 1,000 niggers at the bottom of the sea?
A good start!
What did God say when he made the first nigger?
Oops! Burnt another one!
Why haven't any niggers died from West Nile virus?
Mosquitoes don't land on shit, only flies do!
Why is a nigger like a vending machine?
Neither work, but they both take your money!
Why are blacks so tall?
Their knee grows.
What do you call a bunch of old niggers in a barn?
Antique farm equipment!
Why do they put cotton in pill bottles?
To remind the niggers they used to pick cotton before they were drug dealers!
Why was the nigger with diarrhea freaking out?
He thought he was melting!
Why does Stevie Wonder always smile?
He doesn't know he's black.
What's the difference between Bigfoot and a working nigger?
Bigfoot's been spotted!
What's the definition of Mass Confusion?
Fathers day in Harlem!
What do you call a nigger with an Afro?
Microphone.
What do you call two blacks in a bodybag?
Twix!
Why are there only 2 pall bearer at a niggers funeral?
A garbage can only has two handles!
What does a nigger give his kid for his birthday?
YOUR bike!
Why shouldn't you throw rocks at a nigger driving by?
It could be your car!
Why did the man take off his watch to grab a handful of jelly beans?
He was afraid the blacks would steal it!
How do we know Adam wasn't black?
Ever try taking a rib from a black guy?
What's long, dark and stinks?
The unemployment line!
Why do niggers and spics always have nice clothes, jewelry and cars but still live in shitty houses?
They haven't figured out how to steal houses yet!
Why can't Ray Charles or Stevie Wonder read?
They're niggers!
A woman meets a black guy and invites him back to her place. She handcuffs herself to the bed and screams...
"Do what you black men do best!". The nigger grabs the TV and runs!
What's blue and hangs in my front yard?
My nigger! I'll paint him whatever color I want!
What's a black mans fortune cookie?
A piece of cornbread with a food stamp in the middle!
How does a niggress take a pregnancy test?
She sticks a banana up her pussy, if it comes out half-eaten you know there's another monkey on the way!
What's 8 miles long and has a combined IQ of 56?
The Martin Luther King Day parade!
What's the difference between a nigger and Batman?
Batman can go out at night without Robbin!
What's the difference between a nigger and a letter?
You can send the letter back where it came from!
What do you call a bunch of niggers neck-deep in mud?
Afro-turf
What do you call a bunch of niggers skydiving?
Air pollution!
What's long and hard on a nigger?
Third grade.
A nigger with a parrot walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Hey, where did you get that?"
The parrot says, "Africa! There are millions of them over there just sitting around"
What does NAACP stand for?
Niggers Are Actually Colored People.
What does NAACP stand for?
Niggers Are Always Causing Problems.
Reply
What does NAACP stand for?
Niggers, Apes, Alligators, Coons and Possums.
What do you call a nigger waterskiing?
A top-water jig.
What would you call the Flintstones if they were black?
Niggers!
A nigger, a Jew and a Mexican jump off a building at the same time .. who hits the ground first?
Who cares!
How do you keep a nigger from drowning?
Take your boot off his head.
Ever hear the rumor that niggers are bigger than white men? How do you tell when a nigger is really well hung?
When you can't fit a finger between his neck and the rope!
What do you say to a black man in court?
Will the defendant please rise!
What do you call a black man in high school?
Janitor
What's the only way a person can look at a nigger and smile?
Through the scope of a gun!
Why do niggers keep chickens in their back yards?
To teach their kids how to walk.
How do you keep a nigger from jumping on the bed?
Put Velcro on the ceiling.
Whats the difference between a nigger and a bucket of shit?
The bucket.
What do an apple and a nigger have in common?
They both belong hanging in trees.
Why don't niggers celebrate Thanksgiving?
KFC is closed on holidays.
How do you starve a nigger?
Hide his foodstamps under his work boots.
What do you call seven niggers hanging in a tree?
A wind chime.
What are three things you can't give a nigger?
A fat lip, a black eye and a job!
What's the difference between a dead dog in a road and a dead nigger in a road?
The dog has skid marks in front of it.
What do you call a black priest?
Holy shit!
I had a nigger in my family tree . . .
. . . he's still hanging there!
Why are trees so close in Harlem?
Public transportation.
How long does it take a nigress to take a shit?
9 months
What do you call a nigger with a Harvard education?
A nigger!
Why are all the niggers fast runners?
All the slow ones are in jail.
Whats the difference between niggers and snow tires?
Snow tires don't sing when you put chains on them!
How do you keep a nigger from going out?
Pour more gas on him!
Why do white folks go to nigger garage sales?
To get their stuff back.
How do you keep niggers out of your back yard?
Hang one in your front yard!
What does a nigger and sperm have in common?
Only about 1 out of two million actually work.
What do you do if you wake up in the middle of the night to see your television floating in mid-air?
Shoot the nigger stealing it.
What's the difference between a large pizza and a nigger?
A pizza can feed a family of four.
What's wrong with four niggers in a Cadillac going off a cliff?
A Cadillac seats five!
How can you tell a nigger's just had sex?
His eyes are all red from the mace.
How do you get a nigger to leave you alone?
Throw him a basketball!
What's the difference between a naked white woman and a naked black woman?
One's on the cover of Playboy and the others on the cover of National Geographic.
Why don't niggers dream?
The last one to have a dream got shot.
Reply
Reply
Reply
Reply
Reply
Reply
Leave a comment