Heart's Desire
This question like all the others arrived in his bag on a piece of parchment. He was really starting to believe that the Gods were playing games with his head. Before pulling out his parchment, a jar of ink and a quill; Joxer quickly put a bit more wood on the camp fire so it wouldn't go out before he was finished.
'You already know what my heart's desire is. Anyone who knows me, knows what it is. Well, really, there are two things... one that people know, and one that they don't. And neither will ever be possible. Both... both have something to do with my God, Ares.
It's funny, it feels like their both so deeply intertwined that I couldn't have one without the other. My heart's desire is... Gods, I can't even write it here, knowing I'm going to burn it when I'm done... just in case 'he' sees it... perceives it... what ever it is that he does.
I wanted to say that all I wanted was to be a great warrior, making Lord Ares proud of me. However, that wouldn't fully be the truth, I want more than just to have him proud of me.
I've been in love with Ares ever since I was a little boy. Before I even really knew what love was. And I've wanted him to love me back for just as long, but I've known for years it wouldn't happen.
If it ever did though... I expect that my life would be completely different than it is now. I'd live in a general’s tent, like my father did when he was out with the troops. I'd be some sort of great warrior, one that Ares has always wanted. I'd be someone who commanded respect from people, instead of being a giant joke to the general public.
And Ares would love me, as much as I love him. Even if I could only please him for a short time because I am a mortal... I would have an eternity of memories.
But these are things I know will never happen. I'll always love my God, even if he doesn't care about me.'
Standing up, Joxer walked over to the fire and dropped the parchment into it. Watching the flames first lick at the edges of the paper, then burn to ash. No one needed to know what it said but him.
'You already know what my heart's desire is. Anyone who knows me, knows what it is. Well, really, there are two things... one that people know, and one that they don't. And neither will ever be possible. Both... both have something to do with my God, Ares.
It's funny, it feels like their both so deeply intertwined that I couldn't have one without the other. My heart's desire is... Gods, I can't even write it here, knowing I'm going to burn it when I'm done... just in case 'he' sees it... perceives it... what ever it is that he does.
I wanted to say that all I wanted was to be a great warrior, making Lord Ares proud of me. However, that wouldn't fully be the truth, I want more than just to have him proud of me.
I've been in love with Ares ever since I was a little boy. Before I even really knew what love was. And I've wanted him to love me back for just as long, but I've known for years it wouldn't happen.
If it ever did though... I expect that my life would be completely different than it is now. I'd live in a general’s tent, like my father did when he was out with the troops. I'd be some sort of great warrior, one that Ares has always wanted. I'd be someone who commanded respect from people, instead of being a giant joke to the general public.
And Ares would love me, as much as I love him. Even if I could only please him for a short time because I am a mortal... I would have an eternity of memories.
But these are things I know will never happen. I'll always love my God, even if he doesn't care about me.'
Standing up, Joxer walked over to the fire and dropped the parchment into it. Watching the flames first lick at the edges of the paper, then burn to ash. No one needed to know what it said but him.