growing older kinda sucks
WARNING: DEPRESSING ENTRY TO FOLLOW CONCERNING DEATH AND GROWING OLDER AND ALL SORTS OF STUFF. JUST SOME MUSINGS I WANTED TO SHARE
Until I was in 4th grade, I never was exposed to any death, whether it be a family member or friend or even people I had just met once or twice. I wasnt a totally ignorant kid or anything that thought everyone lived happily ever after forever, that kind of thing just never happened to me in real life. Even in 4th grade it was my 98 yr old great grandmother who died of natural causes which at that point is pretty easy to accept. Ive noticed now that really starting at the end of middle school and on, as Ive gotten older, it seems like the odds are just getting better and better that Ill know someone who dies or has a family member or something. Like the more people I meet as I get older (which through different ways has obviously gotten probably almost expotentially bigger every year since 4th grade when i knew my little grade at school and thats about it) means that out of all the people who die every day one of those people might be someone I am somehow connected to. And not just all the little old ladies I've been reintroduced to by my grandmother a hundred times, but people I know my age are being affected. Just in the past few months a friend from a program this summer's dad died. And tonight i just found out a boy I randomly met at the fair in Miss. whose friend happened to keep in touch with amie's sister was killed getting out of a car because a truck hit him and broke his neck. Out of the blue someone from my past I havent thought about almost since the summer has a freak accident like this, and is just gone. Im not going to pretend that when I heard I felt a deep loss or anything, I knew him for 3 days. But its still affected me and made me think. So is this one of the negatives about growing up and meeting new people? The possibility is out there every day and its just mind boggling. So yeah getting older kinda sucks (understatement of the year).
Until I was in 4th grade, I never was exposed to any death, whether it be a family member or friend or even people I had just met once or twice. I wasnt a totally ignorant kid or anything that thought everyone lived happily ever after forever, that kind of thing just never happened to me in real life. Even in 4th grade it was my 98 yr old great grandmother who died of natural causes which at that point is pretty easy to accept. Ive noticed now that really starting at the end of middle school and on, as Ive gotten older, it seems like the odds are just getting better and better that Ill know someone who dies or has a family member or something. Like the more people I meet as I get older (which through different ways has obviously gotten probably almost expotentially bigger every year since 4th grade when i knew my little grade at school and thats about it) means that out of all the people who die every day one of those people might be someone I am somehow connected to. And not just all the little old ladies I've been reintroduced to by my grandmother a hundred times, but people I know my age are being affected. Just in the past few months a friend from a program this summer's dad died. And tonight i just found out a boy I randomly met at the fair in Miss. whose friend happened to keep in touch with amie's sister was killed getting out of a car because a truck hit him and broke his neck. Out of the blue someone from my past I havent thought about almost since the summer has a freak accident like this, and is just gone. Im not going to pretend that when I heard I felt a deep loss or anything, I knew him for 3 days. But its still affected me and made me think. So is this one of the negatives about growing up and meeting new people? The possibility is out there every day and its just mind boggling. So yeah getting older kinda sucks (understatement of the year).