(no subject)
So the past few weeks have been really tough.
For those who don't know, there are times in your life when you are hit by an event so hard, everything you are is shaken to some extent. Most people are familiar with an experience that has impacted their lives - the first one I can think of is finishing school. What do you do after school? Set out to follow the dream you've put in place to get you through school, or do something else completely different? Travel for a while, living the life of the urban nomad? Stay at home and get a job, earn some funds before breaking off to do your own thing?
However, finishing school will not generally result in you revisiting the basic assumptions most people live with. "My family will always be there for me." "I have so much time ahead of me." "Overall, there is a sense of fairness in the world."
There are only a few times when these things that feel like facts are taken away from you, to show you just how fragile we all are. Nothing can be taken for granted. Edward Norton was onto something when he said "We are the all-singing, all-dancing crap of the world."
There is no meaning to life, no just balance, no fairness, no guarantees. All we have is what we can carry in our hearts and minds - and even those are not safe from the torments of time. According to popular opinion, what I've gone through is something that most people don't do at my age. But I know there are kids out there who have had it harder than me, and my heart goes out to them. They know better than I that all we do is prolong the inevitable for some short term fun.
"So get out there and have some fun" is what part of me is screaming, But it's not that easy when you feel like doing nothing other than laying in bed all day, hoping to fix the bleeding sensation permeating from your heart. I'm sure it's been said, but there is nothing more real than knowledge gained through experience. Knowing that, one day, your family will die is different to pallbearing them to a grave. An event gives knowledge a certain realness that is otherwise lacking.
To be honest, I probably should be getting out there and having as much fun as I can. I should stop drinking so much and get back onto the exercise program. Eat well, sleep well and live well. But if sleeping is being a bitch, then your body cycle gets thrown out of order, and life becomes all that much harder. But sitting around waiting for some magical solution is not the solution. This time, I'm going to try looking for one, and hopefully I'll find a bit more success than previously.
Although I have to say, I am sick and tired of people who are trying to convey sympathy with exclamation points. Do you really think it's appropriate? Really? Get fucked.
For those who don't know, there are times in your life when you are hit by an event so hard, everything you are is shaken to some extent. Most people are familiar with an experience that has impacted their lives - the first one I can think of is finishing school. What do you do after school? Set out to follow the dream you've put in place to get you through school, or do something else completely different? Travel for a while, living the life of the urban nomad? Stay at home and get a job, earn some funds before breaking off to do your own thing?
However, finishing school will not generally result in you revisiting the basic assumptions most people live with. "My family will always be there for me." "I have so much time ahead of me." "Overall, there is a sense of fairness in the world."
There are only a few times when these things that feel like facts are taken away from you, to show you just how fragile we all are. Nothing can be taken for granted. Edward Norton was onto something when he said "We are the all-singing, all-dancing crap of the world."
There is no meaning to life, no just balance, no fairness, no guarantees. All we have is what we can carry in our hearts and minds - and even those are not safe from the torments of time. According to popular opinion, what I've gone through is something that most people don't do at my age. But I know there are kids out there who have had it harder than me, and my heart goes out to them. They know better than I that all we do is prolong the inevitable for some short term fun.
"So get out there and have some fun" is what part of me is screaming, But it's not that easy when you feel like doing nothing other than laying in bed all day, hoping to fix the bleeding sensation permeating from your heart. I'm sure it's been said, but there is nothing more real than knowledge gained through experience. Knowing that, one day, your family will die is different to pallbearing them to a grave. An event gives knowledge a certain realness that is otherwise lacking.
To be honest, I probably should be getting out there and having as much fun as I can. I should stop drinking so much and get back onto the exercise program. Eat well, sleep well and live well. But if sleeping is being a bitch, then your body cycle gets thrown out of order, and life becomes all that much harder. But sitting around waiting for some magical solution is not the solution. This time, I'm going to try looking for one, and hopefully I'll find a bit more success than previously.
Although I have to say, I am sick and tired of people who are trying to convey sympathy with exclamation points. Do you really think it's appropriate? Really? Get fucked.