Fic: An Enduring Fate (3/?)
Title: An Enduring Fate (3/?)
Rating: PG-13
Pairings/Characters: Will/Rachel
Spoilers: Follows canon through A Very Glee Christmas; uses some ideas from rest of season
Disclaimer: All things Glee belong to Ryan Murphy and Fox. I’m just borrowing them.
Summary: Life is a series of starts and stops.
Chapter 1
Chapter 2
NEW: Chapter 3
A/N 1: Thank you everyone for your reviews. They really do motivate me to write more; so, please continue to let me know what you think! Constructive criticism is always welcome. :)
A/N 2: I'm so sorry for the delay on this chapter. I had some serious writer's block. I'm still not sure how I feel but it's done. Please let me know what you think about it and if you don't like it, please stick with me. I think things are back on track now and I'm excited to move on to the next chapter. Updates should be more regular from now on.
A/N 3: Last one, promise! I'm thinking of adding some scenes later on that may raise the rating to NC-17, nothing too explicit. I wanted to get your feedback. Is there anyone out there that may be against a rating change? I hadn't planned on the NC-17 scenes when I started out, so if there is anyone who would prefer not to have them, please let me know and I will take that into consideration as I more forward.
Now on to the story...
~~~~~
The next week was hard for both of them. Will and Rachel had discussed that they couldn’t let anything change between them at school. But by Monday morning, Rachel was nervous. Her first class of the day was Spanish, and as she took her seat next to Mercedes, she reminded herself that she was a good actress; she just had to act like she normally did. It was hard though, when her skin was crawling with anticipation. She just couldn’t wait to see him.
“Rachel, what did you do this weekend?”
She didn’t hear Mercedes at first, instead focused on how the day would play out.
“Rachel,” Mercedes called again, poking Rachel to get her attention.
Rachel turned to her, startled. “Sorry, Mercedes. I guess I was daydreaming. What did you say?”
Mercedes gave her a long look, before repeating herself. “I asked what you did this weekend.”
Rachel smiled, remembering what happened with Will. After admitting how they truly felt, they spent the rest of Saturday curled up together on the couch just watching movies and talking.
“Oh, nothing much. Stayed in mostly, watched a couple of movies.” As Rachel spoke, the bell rang and Will walked in. Rachel immediately turned forward, eyes following his movements as he walked to the desk, laid the papers in his hand down and looked up at the class. He looked first for her, giving a small smile.
She smiled brightly at him, as he began the lesson. “¡Hola clase!”
As Rachel tried to give him her full attention, she noticed that Mercedes kept glancing at her. Rachel suddenly realized she may have seemed too eager to see Will. Maybe she wasn’t the actress she thought she was. Either that or pretending that she wasn’t in love was going to be harder than she assumed.
Maybe the only way she was going to be able to act normal was to avoid Will as much as possible during school, at least until she got used to their relationship. She decided to stay quiet for most of class, not raising her hand at every question like normal. Will seemed to have other ideas though because he called on her repeatedly, even when someone else had raised their hand. He was not being very discreet, and Mercedes kept giving her curious looks. Rachel sighed. She didn’t know what to do. It was the first time she was faced with the reality of their situation and how hard it was actually going to be.
~~~~~
When school ended, Will made his way to the choir room. He hadn’t seen Rachel since Spanish. He was confused when she didn’t raise her hand or actively participate in class. He started to get paranoid that his students would notice how strange that was and began calling on her for everything. He may have gone a bit overboard. He wanted to make everything seem normal but maybe it had a little bit more to do with him wanting to hear her voice.
They should have talked about this more. They said things would be normal during school but they didn’t really talk about what that meant, especially for the first few days. Everything was new and all he wanted to do was pull her in his arms and kiss her. He needed to figure out how he was going to make it through this first week without shouting that he loved Rachel Berry over the PA system. This was ridiculous. He was a grown man; he should be able to act like it.
When Will got to the choir room, Rachel was the only one there, sitting in the front row and looking over some sheet music.
“Rachel.”
She looked up at him and said, “Hi Mr. Schue,” before she looked back down at the music without another word.
Will hesitated. She was being so casual. “How was your day?”
“Good,” she responded, not looking him. Suddenly she jumped up and walked over to where he was standing by the piano, sheet music in hand. She stopped next to him, very little space between them, and placed the music in front of him.
“I was hoping we could talk about the arrangement of this song. While I think you did a nice job, it could be made better by emphasizing some of our stronger singers.”
Will sighed, “Rachel, we talked about this. I can’t just change things to feature you. I know it’s been a while since I’ve given you a solo, and I do have some ideas for the future but this song is a group number.”
He instantly regretted the words, when he saw her face fall. “I wasn’t talking about me. I was going to suggest letting Tina and Mercedes take the lead with this song,” she paused a moment before adding softly, “I don’t know that this is going to work.”
Before Will could respond, other members of the club entered the classroom. Will and Rachel shared a long look before Rachel grabbed the sheet music and returned to her seat.
Glee was a bit of a blur after that. He had forgotten his plan for the class and decided to have the group work on numbers they had previously done. Everything seemed to pass in slow motion. Will wanted to talk to Rachel and that was it, everything else was secondary at that moment. Finally, it was time for class to end.
“Alright everyone. You did a great job today. On Wednesday, we’re really going to start focusing on Regionals; it’s only a couple of weeks away and we need to finalize the set list. We’ll discuss everything on Wednesday, but for now you can go,” Will dismissed the class before calling out, “Rachel, can you stay behind for a moment?”
Rachel remained in her seat and, when the rest of the class filed out, Will grabbed a chair, flipping it around and sitting in front of her. He briefly thought back to the last time they were in this exact position. He laughed internally when he thought about how he was gently letting her down that time. He sobered up though when he realized it could be the other way around this time.
“Rachel, honey, what’s going on?”
“This isn’t going to work. I don’t know how we thought this would work.” She said quietly, not meeting his eyes.
He reached out to her, gently grabbing her chin and pushing her head up to meet her eyes. “No one said this was going to be easy. Things are going to be tricky until we get used to this, but then it will settle down Rachel.”
“I know this isn’t going to be easy. But I didn’t think it was going to be like this. Mercedes kept staring at me during Spanish, and I realized that maybe I wasn’t doing a very good job at acting like things were the same. And then I got scared that I would mess this up, so I thought it was better not to say anything. But I just-I don’t know.” She looked up at him with tears in her eyes, “It’s been like a day and already we are falling apart.”
“We’re not falling apart; we just didn’t think this through completely. What we need to do is sit down and discuss how we should act when at school. You can’t avoid me in hallways or stop participating in class and glee. That looks more suspicious than anything. And I can’t be paranoid about making sure things look normal. We need to set ground rules. And once we have those, we can get through the school days like nothing has changed,” he said as he smiled at her, hoping she would understand that they just needed to try and that things would get better.
She smiled back, her eyes darting to both doors before leaning forward and kissing him quickly on the lips. “Okay. I’m sorry I made things worse than they needed to be. I do that from time to time.”
Will laughed. “Rachel Berry overdramatic? Never!”
~~~~~
Tuesday was better. After talking with Will the day before, Rachel felt much better about everything. They discussed the ground rules, what they needed to do to keep school separate from their relationship. Discussing how they needed to act at school made it easier for her to get through the day. But she found that what helped the most was thinking of Will as Mr. Schuester while at school. Spanish class with Mr. Schuester was easier. She didn’t try to avoid Mr. Schuester in the halls. In fact, she found herself falling into this role much better than she thought she would after the day before.
They didn’t have Glee on Tuesdays but Rachel and Finn, as co-captains, had their weekly meeting with Mr. Schue. She walked to his office as soon as her last class got out. Usually, she would arrive before Finn, but today he was already there, and as it sounded, in the middle of a conversation with their teacher.
She held back a moment before entering when she heard Mr. Schue speak.
“What going on Finn?” He seemed concerned about something and it made Rachel curious.
“It’s Quinn. She’s so worried about prom queen, and the things I should be doing to help us win, but I don’t really know what I should be doing. What did you do in high school? You dated the prom queen right?”
“Yes, Terri was prom queen. But as you know, it’s a popularity contest Finn. You just have to campaign for that like you would anything else.” His voice was tight, and Rachel supposed that his ex-wife may still be a fresh wound.
“Quinn said Rachel would cause us to lose.” Rachel rolled her eyes; it didn’t seem to matter what she did, Quinn was always going to hate her.
“Why would she think that?” she heard Will question.
“Because I still-well, I still care about her.” Rachel was glad she wasn’t in the room. She would probably have started laughing. It was always like this with Finn. He wanted her, then he had her but didn’t want her, then he wanted her again, but then he didn’t. It seemed like an endless loop and she was done with that.
“Finn, you broke up with Rachel.” Rachel smiled at the jealousy she swore she heard in his voice.
But Finn didn’t realized the change in Mr. Schue, “Yes, but really-“
Rachel chose that moment to walk into the office, not really wanting to hear Finn’s excuses again. “Hi Mr. Schue. Finn.”
Will looked up at her but didn’t give her the smile he usually would. She was confused by his reaction to her, but decided to file it away for later.
“So, what are your thoughts for Regional guys?” Mr. Schue asked, as she took her seat in front of the desk next to Finn.
“I think we should stick with the classics, Mr. Schue. We always do well with that.” Finn suggested.
“I was thinking that too. We could do another Journey medley.”
“Mr. Schue,” Rachel interrupted, “while I agree that we did a great job with Journey last year, we need something more. And I think we need to listen to the club. I’m sure they have some great ideas and if they feel included in the decision making process, maybe they’ll put that much more into it.”
“I don’t know, Rachel. We need to make sure we have quality song choices.”
“And the club will provide that. I know they will.”
“You know, maybe Rachel is right,” Finn interjected and she was happy to have his support, “I’m sure the club would like having a say in this.”
“Okay. Well, if you both think that’s the best way to handle this, that’s what we’ll do.” Rachel smiled at Mr. Schue. She couldn’t wait to bring up her idea in class.
Finn stood, grabbing his bag, “Great. Well, I have to go meet Quinn for something. I’ll see you tomorrow.”
“Bye Finn,” Mr. Schue said. When he left the room, Will looked back at her, “You really think this will work, Rachel? Everyone likes different things; choosing one idea over another could lead to some resentment.”
“I think sometimes you underestimate us. I promise the group will come up with great ideas,” she assured
“Okay,” he smiled, “How was your day?”
She was grateful for the change in subject. She didn’t want to be the first one to move from school to personal. “Good. Better. Spanish class was much better.”
“Yes, especially since you decided to participate again,” he teased.
Rachel laughed, remembering how silly things were just the day before. She looked down at her watch and noticing the time, frowned, “I hate to do this, but I have ballet this afternoon, so I should go.”
Will got up and walked around to the front of her desk as Rachel picked up her bag. When she turned he was right in front of her. He leaned down giving her a quick kiss.
When she pulled back, she smiled up at him, “that was against the rules, Mr. Schuester."
She noticed him stiffen slightly, but gave her a tight smile, “I know, but I couldn’t help myself.”
Rachel ducked her head, feeling herself flush at his words. “I really should go. I’ll see you tomorrow.”
~~~~~
At glee on Wednesday, Will turned to their set list for Regionals. He decided Rachel was right. The club may have some great ideas and he should get their opinions for this competition. Their suggestions, however, were not as helpful as Rachel promised they would be.
Sam felt a medley of Justin Bieber’s greatest hits would suit them well. Mike suggested dance music so he and Brittany could show off their skills. Mercedes suggested some classic soul such as Aretha Franklin or Tina Turner, which had some merit but not what he was looking for.
Will sighed, “These are all great suggestion guys, but we need something that will really stand out. Something that will set us apart from the other groups.”
Will was a little confused about Rachel’s silence. He was sure she’d have a contribution of Broadway showstoppers that would be perfect for her voice. Just as he was about to ask for her input, Santana beat him to it.
“What’s the matter, Midget? All out of ideas?”
Will’s eyes snapped to Santana as he said her name with a warning tone.
“It’s okay, Mr. Schue,” Rachel smiled slightly, “I do actually have an idea but I wasn’t sure how the group would feel about it.”
“Well, we would love to hear it, Rachel,” Will encouraged, noticing the eye rolls and looks among the group sitting behind her.
“In order to win, we have to do something new, something innovative. And I think we should write our own original songs.”
The room was silent as everyone processed the suggestion. Will was impressed, proud even. He hadn’t thought of original songs, and she was right. If they did it well, it would really help them stand out.
But, just as he was about to praise the idea, the rest of the group began laughing. He didn’t understand. It was a great suggestion, certainly better than Justin Bieber or dance music, and no one even snickered at those.
Will watched as Rachel looked down, sadly, at her hands sitting in her lap. He hated seeing the others beat her down.
“That’s enough!” Will shouted. Everyone quieted down and he continued, “Rachel has made an excellent suggestion. It is something that would challenge us and I really think we could excel at that.”
“But Mr. Schue,” Quinn interrupted, “What do any of us know about songwriting?”
“Yeah,” Santana agreed, “unlike Little Miss Broadway, the rest of us have not been taking music lessons since we were babies.”
The majority of the group kept quiet, but Mercedes added to the opposition. “Seriously, Mr. Schue, none of us know how to write songs. Rachel will be the only one who comes up with something decent, and she’s not going to let anyone else sing her songs; so, Regionals will just end up being the Rachel Berry Show. But I guess that’s fine with you because everyone knows Rachel is your favorite.”
Will was at a loss for words. He didn’t realize the group felt that way; that his feelings for Rachel looked like favoritism. He struggled through his response, trying to assure the group that they were all important to him. “No, Mercedes. You are all … amazing. Each and every one of you is special. This group wouldn’t be the same without all of you. I’m just trying to push you guys to do something different, something I think you could be great at and--”
“Mr. Schuester,” Rachel interjected, “if the rest of the group is against the idea, we should stick with what we know.”
He looked at her for a long moment, about to protest, when he heard sighs of relief coming from some of the group. If they really didn’t want to do this, maybe he shouldn’t make them.
“Okay, Rachel, if that’s how everyone feels.” He saw them all nod and sighed, “In that case, let’s get some other suggestions on the board.”
By the time rehearsal ended, they managed to come up with a pretty good set list but it lacked that wow factor. As everyone left, he noticed Rachel lingering. He smiled to himself; he hadn’t been alone with her all day. He stayed in the room, pretending to busy himself with the sheet music, as the last of the group left. He looked up then, his eyes meeting Rachel’s. He suddenly needed to know why she easily gave up on her idea.
“What was that about, Rachel?” He asked as he took a seat next to her.
“What do you mean?”
“I mean, why did you give up on the original song idea? It was great Rachel.”
She smirked at him, “I know that, Will. But the fact is, the group didn’t want that, and you were showing favoritism. That’s against the rules.”
Will started to protest, but Rachel continued on, cutting off his argument, “Admit it, Will. You only pushed for the idea because we’re together. I’ve had several amazing ideas in the past and you’ve shot down every one of them. If we weren’t together, you would have put it to a vote, everyone would have voted against it and we would have moved on.”
Will sat stunned at her observation and then thought about what she said. It was true. He had tried so hard to fight his feelings for her, and he knew that sometimes, he was tougher on her that he should have been.
“I’m sorry, Rachel.”
“It’s okay.”
“No, it’s not. I’ve sometimes been unfair to you.”
“Yes,” she agreed, “but that was in the past. Let’s not talk about that.”
She stood with a mischievous glint in her eye. He watched as she got up to close the door.
“Instead, let’s work on that solo you are going to give me.”
He smiled, rolling his eyes, but got up anyway and searched through the music for the song he had already been planning to give her. When he handed it to her, she smiled and, standing on her tiptoes, leaned up to kiss him.
Will deepened the kiss, pulling her to him before lifting her up and sitting her on the piano. He needed to stop this. They were at school. It was against the ground rules, but when she pushed against him, her hands resting on his chest, her legs wrapping around his waist, he gave into the feeling. A few minutes wouldn’t hurt.
He rested his hands on her thighs, just below the hem of her skirt, which had ridden up quite a bit. This was the first time he touched her like this. He reveled in the feel of her soft, smooth skin under his hands. He rubbed them up and down her thighs, moving higher with each stroke until his hands disappeared under her skirt. He was enjoying her soft sighs, as their tongues danced together, her fingers clutching his shirt.
He moved his hands further under her skirt, around her hips, until he was cupping her soft behind. He gently pulled her forward until she came in contact with his arousal. He groaned at the sensation but noticed that Rachel instantly stiffened. Her hands were no longer clutching his shirt but instead laying flat against his chest.
Will immediately pulled back a couple of inches, his hands moving to rest on the piano on either side of her. He looked at her. Her eyes were dark, she looked thoroughly kissed, but he also sensed a bit of fear.
She looked like she wanted to say something, but hesitated, before saying instead, “My dad will be here soon. I should go.”
He backed away from her, nodding and not sure what to say. Should he apologize? Tell her he didn’t mean to pressure her? But then she smiled brightly at him, and he knew that things were okay. She wasn’t upset about what had just happened.
He watched her walk over to her bag, picking it up and placing it on her shoulder.
“What are you doing Saturday night?”
She pretended to think, “I might have a couple free hours, why?”
He smiled, “Do you want to come over? I can make us dinner; we can watch a movie.”
“That sounds perfect.” She walked over to him, throwing her arms around his neck. He returned the hug, wrapping his arms around her waist and she whispered, “I love you.”
He sighed at the words and whispered back, “I love you too, Rach,” before placing a kiss on her neck. She pulled back, smiling up at him before turning and walking out of the room.
~~~~~
The rest of the week was easier, better. They fell into their relationship, found it easier to act like they normally did. They both understood if they crossed that line while in school again, this thing was never going to last. Saturday couldn’t come fast enough for Rachel. Being with Will outside of school made it feel more real, as if they were just boyfriend and girlfriend and not also student and teacher.
When Saturday did arrive, Rachel could hardly contain her excitement. She was going to have her first date with Will. Granted they weren’t going to leave his apartment, but he was making her dinner and they were going to watch a movie in his living room, and really that was a lot more intimate and romantic than going out. She was a little nervous though. She wasn’t quite sure what he was expecting.
She arrived at his apartment and took a deep breath before knocking on the door.
“Coming!” She heard his muffled voice respond. When the door opened the first thing she noticed was how good dinner smelled. She was pleasantly surprised when he mentioned cooking for her. Terri told her he never cooked that embarrassing day she came to his apartment and proceeded to clean and cook for his wife.
“Hi,” he smiled at her.
The second thing she noticed was how good Will looked. He was dressed more casually than she had seen him at school, wearing dark blue jeans and a black V-neck. He held the door open and as she stepped in past him, she got a whiff of his cologne. She had to stifle a moan at how good he smelled.
“Hi. Something smells really good,” she complemented as she unbuttoned her coat. He reached out to take it off and hung it next to the door.
His eyes swept over her; she was wearing a red dress with small white polka dots. The neck line was low, exposing her neck and just a tiny hint of cleavage, not that she had much to begin with. But she knew she looked fantastic.
Will looked back up, meeting her eyes. “You look beautiful. I’m making pasta, completely vegan-friendly. I’m just finishing up.”
Rachel followed him to the kitchen as he went over to the pot of sauce. She leaned against the counter, taking a moment to watch him work.
“Have you graded the Spanish tests yet?” She asked as he started the boiling the pasta.
He looked over his shoulder with a smirk, “Rachel, I thought one of the ground rules was to not discuss things that fall under the student/teacher category.”
“I know that but you were staring at me during the entire test yesterday and it was hard to concentrate,” she said with a slight pout.
Will leaned over, kissing her quickly, “I couldn’t help it with the skirts you wear, but it didn’t look like it bothered you.” She knew he was referring to the smile they shared when she looked up at him and caught his eyes looking back at her. But she wondered too if he noticed how she parted her legs slightly for him. It was just for a minute or so but she felt a rush when she did it. That’s not something she would have ever thought she would do, but she was sitting in the front row and he was staring at her like he wanted to devour her. She wanted to throw him off as much as he was throwing her off.
As she thought back to how it felt to have him looking at her like that, Will continued on, “Besides, one bad grade will hardly hurt your average.”
Rachel was alarmed, “I got a bad grade?!”
Will laughed, adding the pasta to the sauce, “I haven’t graded them yet Rachel; I’m just saying if you did falter, you get straight-a’s. This one test isn’t going to mess up your average. Now no more school talk, it’s time for our date.”
They started their meal in silence. Except for praising his cooking, Rachel wasn’t sure what to talk about. She was trying to stay away from school-related topics but one thing kept popping up in the back of her mind.
“Will?”
“Yeah.”
“I heard you and Finn talking for a couple of minutes on Tuesday before our meeting,” she started.
He looked up at her, “Oh?”
“Yeah, I was about to walk in when I heard him talk about Quinn and prom and how she was mad at him because of me.”
Will looked down, his brow furrowed and Rachel noticed the nervous breath he took, but she continued on, “When he said he still cared about me, you seemed almost angry.”
Will sighed, “I wasn’t angry, Rachel. I was just-he still cares about you, Rachel. I think he still wants to be with you.”
“He broke up with me.”
“Yes, but maybe he’s having doubts. I wouldn’t blame him if he decided he wanted you back, and I guess that worries me.”
Rachel smiled when she realized he was afraid of losing her. “Even if he does want me back, I don’t want to be with him anymore. It’s you I want to be with.”
Will looked up at her, relief showing in his face. “Okay then.”
“So, you dated the prom queen?” she asked, “Were you king?”
Will let out a slight chuckle and she was glad he wasn’t upset that she brought up his ex-wife. “No, I was not prom king, much to Terri’s displeasure. She campaigned for that crown for weeks. She was so happy when she got it.”
She saw him smile at the memory, and she remembered how he sounded when he was talking to Finn about it. She wanted to ask him about it, but wasn’t sure how it would feel to hear him talk about his marriage. She knew it didn’t end well, but he had shared his life with Terri for 15 years, loved her for 15 years. He had told her he loved her, but she wasn’t quite sure what that love meant for them, if he thought about a future with her. But she decided she needed to know.
“You really loved her?”
She could tell he was uncomfortable but was happy when he didn’t shut her out. “Of course I did. I thought for the longest time that she was the love of my life. We were so happy together. But I was wrong and things eventually changed. We didn’t grow together like we were supposed to. And you know that it didn’t end well. But I don’t regret it. I don’t regret falling in love with her and I don’t regret marrying her. I think, in a way, I owe her for showing me what it is I really want in life.”
He looked up at her then, and she didn’t quite know what to say. Sure she had loved Finn but she couldn’t equate that to what he had with Terri. She wanted to ask him what it was he wanted but thought it was too soon. They had only just started this relationship and though she fell quickly, she knew it was too soon to start talking about their future.
She was saved though when he changed the subject to her upcoming dance recital. As dinner continued, the conversation between them became lighter and they talked and laughed about things normal couples would talk and laugh about. It felt good, to be a normal couple for the night.
After dinner, they both cleaned up the dishes before they made their way to the couch.
“So,” Will said, “I picked up a couple of movies, both of which I think you will like but I wasn’t sure what you might be in the mood for. So, I got a romantic comedy and a drama.
“Hmmm, that’s tough choice but I think we should watch the romantic comedy.”
“Sounds good to me,” Will said as he put the movie into the DVD player, “and we could always make it a double feature. What did you tell your dads you were doing tonight?”
He sat beside her on the couch, throwing his arm around her shoulder and starting to kiss along her exposed neck.
“I told them I was hanging out with Mercedes.”
“Maybe you could be spending the night with Mercedes,” he whispered into her neck.
Rachel stiffened. This is what she was worried about. She didn’t know what he was expecting from her tonight and she didn’t think she was ready. She laughed nervously, “I um, I don’t-“
Will broke away from her, rushing to assure her, “I’m sorry Rachel that was wrong of me, and I didn’t mean it like that. I just-I just want to spend as much time with you as I can. We aren’t able to see each other much. I didn’t even mean that we had to do anything.”
Rachel grabbed his hand, “I want to. I want to be with you. I’m just not completely ready for that yet.”
“And that’s okay. I love you, Rachel. I’m not going to push. I’ll wait for you.”
She was noticeably relieved, “Thank you.”
He smiled at her, kissing her on the forehead and resting his arm around her shoulder. “Let’s just watch the movie for now.”
Rating: PG-13
Pairings/Characters: Will/Rachel
Spoilers: Follows canon through A Very Glee Christmas; uses some ideas from rest of season
Disclaimer: All things Glee belong to Ryan Murphy and Fox. I’m just borrowing them.
Summary: Life is a series of starts and stops.
Chapter 1
Chapter 2
NEW: Chapter 3
A/N 1: Thank you everyone for your reviews. They really do motivate me to write more; so, please continue to let me know what you think! Constructive criticism is always welcome. :)
A/N 2: I'm so sorry for the delay on this chapter. I had some serious writer's block. I'm still not sure how I feel but it's done. Please let me know what you think about it and if you don't like it, please stick with me. I think things are back on track now and I'm excited to move on to the next chapter. Updates should be more regular from now on.
A/N 3: Last one, promise! I'm thinking of adding some scenes later on that may raise the rating to NC-17, nothing too explicit. I wanted to get your feedback. Is there anyone out there that may be against a rating change? I hadn't planned on the NC-17 scenes when I started out, so if there is anyone who would prefer not to have them, please let me know and I will take that into consideration as I more forward.
Now on to the story...
~~~~~
The next week was hard for both of them. Will and Rachel had discussed that they couldn’t let anything change between them at school. But by Monday morning, Rachel was nervous. Her first class of the day was Spanish, and as she took her seat next to Mercedes, she reminded herself that she was a good actress; she just had to act like she normally did. It was hard though, when her skin was crawling with anticipation. She just couldn’t wait to see him.
“Rachel, what did you do this weekend?”
She didn’t hear Mercedes at first, instead focused on how the day would play out.
“Rachel,” Mercedes called again, poking Rachel to get her attention.
Rachel turned to her, startled. “Sorry, Mercedes. I guess I was daydreaming. What did you say?”
Mercedes gave her a long look, before repeating herself. “I asked what you did this weekend.”
Rachel smiled, remembering what happened with Will. After admitting how they truly felt, they spent the rest of Saturday curled up together on the couch just watching movies and talking.
“Oh, nothing much. Stayed in mostly, watched a couple of movies.” As Rachel spoke, the bell rang and Will walked in. Rachel immediately turned forward, eyes following his movements as he walked to the desk, laid the papers in his hand down and looked up at the class. He looked first for her, giving a small smile.
She smiled brightly at him, as he began the lesson. “¡Hola clase!”
As Rachel tried to give him her full attention, she noticed that Mercedes kept glancing at her. Rachel suddenly realized she may have seemed too eager to see Will. Maybe she wasn’t the actress she thought she was. Either that or pretending that she wasn’t in love was going to be harder than she assumed.
Maybe the only way she was going to be able to act normal was to avoid Will as much as possible during school, at least until she got used to their relationship. She decided to stay quiet for most of class, not raising her hand at every question like normal. Will seemed to have other ideas though because he called on her repeatedly, even when someone else had raised their hand. He was not being very discreet, and Mercedes kept giving her curious looks. Rachel sighed. She didn’t know what to do. It was the first time she was faced with the reality of their situation and how hard it was actually going to be.
~~~~~
When school ended, Will made his way to the choir room. He hadn’t seen Rachel since Spanish. He was confused when she didn’t raise her hand or actively participate in class. He started to get paranoid that his students would notice how strange that was and began calling on her for everything. He may have gone a bit overboard. He wanted to make everything seem normal but maybe it had a little bit more to do with him wanting to hear her voice.
They should have talked about this more. They said things would be normal during school but they didn’t really talk about what that meant, especially for the first few days. Everything was new and all he wanted to do was pull her in his arms and kiss her. He needed to figure out how he was going to make it through this first week without shouting that he loved Rachel Berry over the PA system. This was ridiculous. He was a grown man; he should be able to act like it.
When Will got to the choir room, Rachel was the only one there, sitting in the front row and looking over some sheet music.
“Rachel.”
She looked up at him and said, “Hi Mr. Schue,” before she looked back down at the music without another word.
Will hesitated. She was being so casual. “How was your day?”
“Good,” she responded, not looking him. Suddenly she jumped up and walked over to where he was standing by the piano, sheet music in hand. She stopped next to him, very little space between them, and placed the music in front of him.
“I was hoping we could talk about the arrangement of this song. While I think you did a nice job, it could be made better by emphasizing some of our stronger singers.”
Will sighed, “Rachel, we talked about this. I can’t just change things to feature you. I know it’s been a while since I’ve given you a solo, and I do have some ideas for the future but this song is a group number.”
He instantly regretted the words, when he saw her face fall. “I wasn’t talking about me. I was going to suggest letting Tina and Mercedes take the lead with this song,” she paused a moment before adding softly, “I don’t know that this is going to work.”
Before Will could respond, other members of the club entered the classroom. Will and Rachel shared a long look before Rachel grabbed the sheet music and returned to her seat.
Glee was a bit of a blur after that. He had forgotten his plan for the class and decided to have the group work on numbers they had previously done. Everything seemed to pass in slow motion. Will wanted to talk to Rachel and that was it, everything else was secondary at that moment. Finally, it was time for class to end.
“Alright everyone. You did a great job today. On Wednesday, we’re really going to start focusing on Regionals; it’s only a couple of weeks away and we need to finalize the set list. We’ll discuss everything on Wednesday, but for now you can go,” Will dismissed the class before calling out, “Rachel, can you stay behind for a moment?”
Rachel remained in her seat and, when the rest of the class filed out, Will grabbed a chair, flipping it around and sitting in front of her. He briefly thought back to the last time they were in this exact position. He laughed internally when he thought about how he was gently letting her down that time. He sobered up though when he realized it could be the other way around this time.
“Rachel, honey, what’s going on?”
“This isn’t going to work. I don’t know how we thought this would work.” She said quietly, not meeting his eyes.
He reached out to her, gently grabbing her chin and pushing her head up to meet her eyes. “No one said this was going to be easy. Things are going to be tricky until we get used to this, but then it will settle down Rachel.”
“I know this isn’t going to be easy. But I didn’t think it was going to be like this. Mercedes kept staring at me during Spanish, and I realized that maybe I wasn’t doing a very good job at acting like things were the same. And then I got scared that I would mess this up, so I thought it was better not to say anything. But I just-I don’t know.” She looked up at him with tears in her eyes, “It’s been like a day and already we are falling apart.”
“We’re not falling apart; we just didn’t think this through completely. What we need to do is sit down and discuss how we should act when at school. You can’t avoid me in hallways or stop participating in class and glee. That looks more suspicious than anything. And I can’t be paranoid about making sure things look normal. We need to set ground rules. And once we have those, we can get through the school days like nothing has changed,” he said as he smiled at her, hoping she would understand that they just needed to try and that things would get better.
She smiled back, her eyes darting to both doors before leaning forward and kissing him quickly on the lips. “Okay. I’m sorry I made things worse than they needed to be. I do that from time to time.”
Will laughed. “Rachel Berry overdramatic? Never!”
~~~~~
Tuesday was better. After talking with Will the day before, Rachel felt much better about everything. They discussed the ground rules, what they needed to do to keep school separate from their relationship. Discussing how they needed to act at school made it easier for her to get through the day. But she found that what helped the most was thinking of Will as Mr. Schuester while at school. Spanish class with Mr. Schuester was easier. She didn’t try to avoid Mr. Schuester in the halls. In fact, she found herself falling into this role much better than she thought she would after the day before.
They didn’t have Glee on Tuesdays but Rachel and Finn, as co-captains, had their weekly meeting with Mr. Schue. She walked to his office as soon as her last class got out. Usually, she would arrive before Finn, but today he was already there, and as it sounded, in the middle of a conversation with their teacher.
She held back a moment before entering when she heard Mr. Schue speak.
“What going on Finn?” He seemed concerned about something and it made Rachel curious.
“It’s Quinn. She’s so worried about prom queen, and the things I should be doing to help us win, but I don’t really know what I should be doing. What did you do in high school? You dated the prom queen right?”
“Yes, Terri was prom queen. But as you know, it’s a popularity contest Finn. You just have to campaign for that like you would anything else.” His voice was tight, and Rachel supposed that his ex-wife may still be a fresh wound.
“Quinn said Rachel would cause us to lose.” Rachel rolled her eyes; it didn’t seem to matter what she did, Quinn was always going to hate her.
“Why would she think that?” she heard Will question.
“Because I still-well, I still care about her.” Rachel was glad she wasn’t in the room. She would probably have started laughing. It was always like this with Finn. He wanted her, then he had her but didn’t want her, then he wanted her again, but then he didn’t. It seemed like an endless loop and she was done with that.
“Finn, you broke up with Rachel.” Rachel smiled at the jealousy she swore she heard in his voice.
But Finn didn’t realized the change in Mr. Schue, “Yes, but really-“
Rachel chose that moment to walk into the office, not really wanting to hear Finn’s excuses again. “Hi Mr. Schue. Finn.”
Will looked up at her but didn’t give her the smile he usually would. She was confused by his reaction to her, but decided to file it away for later.
“So, what are your thoughts for Regional guys?” Mr. Schue asked, as she took her seat in front of the desk next to Finn.
“I think we should stick with the classics, Mr. Schue. We always do well with that.” Finn suggested.
“I was thinking that too. We could do another Journey medley.”
“Mr. Schue,” Rachel interrupted, “while I agree that we did a great job with Journey last year, we need something more. And I think we need to listen to the club. I’m sure they have some great ideas and if they feel included in the decision making process, maybe they’ll put that much more into it.”
“I don’t know, Rachel. We need to make sure we have quality song choices.”
“And the club will provide that. I know they will.”
“You know, maybe Rachel is right,” Finn interjected and she was happy to have his support, “I’m sure the club would like having a say in this.”
“Okay. Well, if you both think that’s the best way to handle this, that’s what we’ll do.” Rachel smiled at Mr. Schue. She couldn’t wait to bring up her idea in class.
Finn stood, grabbing his bag, “Great. Well, I have to go meet Quinn for something. I’ll see you tomorrow.”
“Bye Finn,” Mr. Schue said. When he left the room, Will looked back at her, “You really think this will work, Rachel? Everyone likes different things; choosing one idea over another could lead to some resentment.”
“I think sometimes you underestimate us. I promise the group will come up with great ideas,” she assured
“Okay,” he smiled, “How was your day?”
She was grateful for the change in subject. She didn’t want to be the first one to move from school to personal. “Good. Better. Spanish class was much better.”
“Yes, especially since you decided to participate again,” he teased.
Rachel laughed, remembering how silly things were just the day before. She looked down at her watch and noticing the time, frowned, “I hate to do this, but I have ballet this afternoon, so I should go.”
Will got up and walked around to the front of her desk as Rachel picked up her bag. When she turned he was right in front of her. He leaned down giving her a quick kiss.
When she pulled back, she smiled up at him, “that was against the rules, Mr. Schuester."
She noticed him stiffen slightly, but gave her a tight smile, “I know, but I couldn’t help myself.”
Rachel ducked her head, feeling herself flush at his words. “I really should go. I’ll see you tomorrow.”
~~~~~
At glee on Wednesday, Will turned to their set list for Regionals. He decided Rachel was right. The club may have some great ideas and he should get their opinions for this competition. Their suggestions, however, were not as helpful as Rachel promised they would be.
Sam felt a medley of Justin Bieber’s greatest hits would suit them well. Mike suggested dance music so he and Brittany could show off their skills. Mercedes suggested some classic soul such as Aretha Franklin or Tina Turner, which had some merit but not what he was looking for.
Will sighed, “These are all great suggestion guys, but we need something that will really stand out. Something that will set us apart from the other groups.”
Will was a little confused about Rachel’s silence. He was sure she’d have a contribution of Broadway showstoppers that would be perfect for her voice. Just as he was about to ask for her input, Santana beat him to it.
“What’s the matter, Midget? All out of ideas?”
Will’s eyes snapped to Santana as he said her name with a warning tone.
“It’s okay, Mr. Schue,” Rachel smiled slightly, “I do actually have an idea but I wasn’t sure how the group would feel about it.”
“Well, we would love to hear it, Rachel,” Will encouraged, noticing the eye rolls and looks among the group sitting behind her.
“In order to win, we have to do something new, something innovative. And I think we should write our own original songs.”
The room was silent as everyone processed the suggestion. Will was impressed, proud even. He hadn’t thought of original songs, and she was right. If they did it well, it would really help them stand out.
But, just as he was about to praise the idea, the rest of the group began laughing. He didn’t understand. It was a great suggestion, certainly better than Justin Bieber or dance music, and no one even snickered at those.
Will watched as Rachel looked down, sadly, at her hands sitting in her lap. He hated seeing the others beat her down.
“That’s enough!” Will shouted. Everyone quieted down and he continued, “Rachel has made an excellent suggestion. It is something that would challenge us and I really think we could excel at that.”
“But Mr. Schue,” Quinn interrupted, “What do any of us know about songwriting?”
“Yeah,” Santana agreed, “unlike Little Miss Broadway, the rest of us have not been taking music lessons since we were babies.”
The majority of the group kept quiet, but Mercedes added to the opposition. “Seriously, Mr. Schue, none of us know how to write songs. Rachel will be the only one who comes up with something decent, and she’s not going to let anyone else sing her songs; so, Regionals will just end up being the Rachel Berry Show. But I guess that’s fine with you because everyone knows Rachel is your favorite.”
Will was at a loss for words. He didn’t realize the group felt that way; that his feelings for Rachel looked like favoritism. He struggled through his response, trying to assure the group that they were all important to him. “No, Mercedes. You are all … amazing. Each and every one of you is special. This group wouldn’t be the same without all of you. I’m just trying to push you guys to do something different, something I think you could be great at and--”
“Mr. Schuester,” Rachel interjected, “if the rest of the group is against the idea, we should stick with what we know.”
He looked at her for a long moment, about to protest, when he heard sighs of relief coming from some of the group. If they really didn’t want to do this, maybe he shouldn’t make them.
“Okay, Rachel, if that’s how everyone feels.” He saw them all nod and sighed, “In that case, let’s get some other suggestions on the board.”
By the time rehearsal ended, they managed to come up with a pretty good set list but it lacked that wow factor. As everyone left, he noticed Rachel lingering. He smiled to himself; he hadn’t been alone with her all day. He stayed in the room, pretending to busy himself with the sheet music, as the last of the group left. He looked up then, his eyes meeting Rachel’s. He suddenly needed to know why she easily gave up on her idea.
“What was that about, Rachel?” He asked as he took a seat next to her.
“What do you mean?”
“I mean, why did you give up on the original song idea? It was great Rachel.”
She smirked at him, “I know that, Will. But the fact is, the group didn’t want that, and you were showing favoritism. That’s against the rules.”
Will started to protest, but Rachel continued on, cutting off his argument, “Admit it, Will. You only pushed for the idea because we’re together. I’ve had several amazing ideas in the past and you’ve shot down every one of them. If we weren’t together, you would have put it to a vote, everyone would have voted against it and we would have moved on.”
Will sat stunned at her observation and then thought about what she said. It was true. He had tried so hard to fight his feelings for her, and he knew that sometimes, he was tougher on her that he should have been.
“I’m sorry, Rachel.”
“It’s okay.”
“No, it’s not. I’ve sometimes been unfair to you.”
“Yes,” she agreed, “but that was in the past. Let’s not talk about that.”
She stood with a mischievous glint in her eye. He watched as she got up to close the door.
“Instead, let’s work on that solo you are going to give me.”
He smiled, rolling his eyes, but got up anyway and searched through the music for the song he had already been planning to give her. When he handed it to her, she smiled and, standing on her tiptoes, leaned up to kiss him.
Will deepened the kiss, pulling her to him before lifting her up and sitting her on the piano. He needed to stop this. They were at school. It was against the ground rules, but when she pushed against him, her hands resting on his chest, her legs wrapping around his waist, he gave into the feeling. A few minutes wouldn’t hurt.
He rested his hands on her thighs, just below the hem of her skirt, which had ridden up quite a bit. This was the first time he touched her like this. He reveled in the feel of her soft, smooth skin under his hands. He rubbed them up and down her thighs, moving higher with each stroke until his hands disappeared under her skirt. He was enjoying her soft sighs, as their tongues danced together, her fingers clutching his shirt.
He moved his hands further under her skirt, around her hips, until he was cupping her soft behind. He gently pulled her forward until she came in contact with his arousal. He groaned at the sensation but noticed that Rachel instantly stiffened. Her hands were no longer clutching his shirt but instead laying flat against his chest.
Will immediately pulled back a couple of inches, his hands moving to rest on the piano on either side of her. He looked at her. Her eyes were dark, she looked thoroughly kissed, but he also sensed a bit of fear.
She looked like she wanted to say something, but hesitated, before saying instead, “My dad will be here soon. I should go.”
He backed away from her, nodding and not sure what to say. Should he apologize? Tell her he didn’t mean to pressure her? But then she smiled brightly at him, and he knew that things were okay. She wasn’t upset about what had just happened.
He watched her walk over to her bag, picking it up and placing it on her shoulder.
“What are you doing Saturday night?”
She pretended to think, “I might have a couple free hours, why?”
He smiled, “Do you want to come over? I can make us dinner; we can watch a movie.”
“That sounds perfect.” She walked over to him, throwing her arms around his neck. He returned the hug, wrapping his arms around her waist and she whispered, “I love you.”
He sighed at the words and whispered back, “I love you too, Rach,” before placing a kiss on her neck. She pulled back, smiling up at him before turning and walking out of the room.
~~~~~
The rest of the week was easier, better. They fell into their relationship, found it easier to act like they normally did. They both understood if they crossed that line while in school again, this thing was never going to last. Saturday couldn’t come fast enough for Rachel. Being with Will outside of school made it feel more real, as if they were just boyfriend and girlfriend and not also student and teacher.
When Saturday did arrive, Rachel could hardly contain her excitement. She was going to have her first date with Will. Granted they weren’t going to leave his apartment, but he was making her dinner and they were going to watch a movie in his living room, and really that was a lot more intimate and romantic than going out. She was a little nervous though. She wasn’t quite sure what he was expecting.
She arrived at his apartment and took a deep breath before knocking on the door.
“Coming!” She heard his muffled voice respond. When the door opened the first thing she noticed was how good dinner smelled. She was pleasantly surprised when he mentioned cooking for her. Terri told her he never cooked that embarrassing day she came to his apartment and proceeded to clean and cook for his wife.
“Hi,” he smiled at her.
The second thing she noticed was how good Will looked. He was dressed more casually than she had seen him at school, wearing dark blue jeans and a black V-neck. He held the door open and as she stepped in past him, she got a whiff of his cologne. She had to stifle a moan at how good he smelled.
“Hi. Something smells really good,” she complemented as she unbuttoned her coat. He reached out to take it off and hung it next to the door.
His eyes swept over her; she was wearing a red dress with small white polka dots. The neck line was low, exposing her neck and just a tiny hint of cleavage, not that she had much to begin with. But she knew she looked fantastic.
Will looked back up, meeting her eyes. “You look beautiful. I’m making pasta, completely vegan-friendly. I’m just finishing up.”
Rachel followed him to the kitchen as he went over to the pot of sauce. She leaned against the counter, taking a moment to watch him work.
“Have you graded the Spanish tests yet?” She asked as he started the boiling the pasta.
He looked over his shoulder with a smirk, “Rachel, I thought one of the ground rules was to not discuss things that fall under the student/teacher category.”
“I know that but you were staring at me during the entire test yesterday and it was hard to concentrate,” she said with a slight pout.
Will leaned over, kissing her quickly, “I couldn’t help it with the skirts you wear, but it didn’t look like it bothered you.” She knew he was referring to the smile they shared when she looked up at him and caught his eyes looking back at her. But she wondered too if he noticed how she parted her legs slightly for him. It was just for a minute or so but she felt a rush when she did it. That’s not something she would have ever thought she would do, but she was sitting in the front row and he was staring at her like he wanted to devour her. She wanted to throw him off as much as he was throwing her off.
As she thought back to how it felt to have him looking at her like that, Will continued on, “Besides, one bad grade will hardly hurt your average.”
Rachel was alarmed, “I got a bad grade?!”
Will laughed, adding the pasta to the sauce, “I haven’t graded them yet Rachel; I’m just saying if you did falter, you get straight-a’s. This one test isn’t going to mess up your average. Now no more school talk, it’s time for our date.”
They started their meal in silence. Except for praising his cooking, Rachel wasn’t sure what to talk about. She was trying to stay away from school-related topics but one thing kept popping up in the back of her mind.
“Will?”
“Yeah.”
“I heard you and Finn talking for a couple of minutes on Tuesday before our meeting,” she started.
He looked up at her, “Oh?”
“Yeah, I was about to walk in when I heard him talk about Quinn and prom and how she was mad at him because of me.”
Will looked down, his brow furrowed and Rachel noticed the nervous breath he took, but she continued on, “When he said he still cared about me, you seemed almost angry.”
Will sighed, “I wasn’t angry, Rachel. I was just-he still cares about you, Rachel. I think he still wants to be with you.”
“He broke up with me.”
“Yes, but maybe he’s having doubts. I wouldn’t blame him if he decided he wanted you back, and I guess that worries me.”
Rachel smiled when she realized he was afraid of losing her. “Even if he does want me back, I don’t want to be with him anymore. It’s you I want to be with.”
Will looked up at her, relief showing in his face. “Okay then.”
“So, you dated the prom queen?” she asked, “Were you king?”
Will let out a slight chuckle and she was glad he wasn’t upset that she brought up his ex-wife. “No, I was not prom king, much to Terri’s displeasure. She campaigned for that crown for weeks. She was so happy when she got it.”
She saw him smile at the memory, and she remembered how he sounded when he was talking to Finn about it. She wanted to ask him about it, but wasn’t sure how it would feel to hear him talk about his marriage. She knew it didn’t end well, but he had shared his life with Terri for 15 years, loved her for 15 years. He had told her he loved her, but she wasn’t quite sure what that love meant for them, if he thought about a future with her. But she decided she needed to know.
“You really loved her?”
She could tell he was uncomfortable but was happy when he didn’t shut her out. “Of course I did. I thought for the longest time that she was the love of my life. We were so happy together. But I was wrong and things eventually changed. We didn’t grow together like we were supposed to. And you know that it didn’t end well. But I don’t regret it. I don’t regret falling in love with her and I don’t regret marrying her. I think, in a way, I owe her for showing me what it is I really want in life.”
He looked up at her then, and she didn’t quite know what to say. Sure she had loved Finn but she couldn’t equate that to what he had with Terri. She wanted to ask him what it was he wanted but thought it was too soon. They had only just started this relationship and though she fell quickly, she knew it was too soon to start talking about their future.
She was saved though when he changed the subject to her upcoming dance recital. As dinner continued, the conversation between them became lighter and they talked and laughed about things normal couples would talk and laugh about. It felt good, to be a normal couple for the night.
After dinner, they both cleaned up the dishes before they made their way to the couch.
“So,” Will said, “I picked up a couple of movies, both of which I think you will like but I wasn’t sure what you might be in the mood for. So, I got a romantic comedy and a drama.
“Hmmm, that’s tough choice but I think we should watch the romantic comedy.”
“Sounds good to me,” Will said as he put the movie into the DVD player, “and we could always make it a double feature. What did you tell your dads you were doing tonight?”
He sat beside her on the couch, throwing his arm around her shoulder and starting to kiss along her exposed neck.
“I told them I was hanging out with Mercedes.”
“Maybe you could be spending the night with Mercedes,” he whispered into her neck.
Rachel stiffened. This is what she was worried about. She didn’t know what he was expecting from her tonight and she didn’t think she was ready. She laughed nervously, “I um, I don’t-“
Will broke away from her, rushing to assure her, “I’m sorry Rachel that was wrong of me, and I didn’t mean it like that. I just-I just want to spend as much time with you as I can. We aren’t able to see each other much. I didn’t even mean that we had to do anything.”
Rachel grabbed his hand, “I want to. I want to be with you. I’m just not completely ready for that yet.”
“And that’s okay. I love you, Rachel. I’m not going to push. I’ll wait for you.”
She was noticeably relieved, “Thank you.”
He smiled at her, kissing her on the forehead and resting his arm around her shoulder. “Let’s just watch the movie for now.”