Natural History III
There is a provocative film making the rounds in video stores across the nation titled "Pterodactyl." Starring MTV Music Video Award-winning actor Coolio (Dangerous Minds, Phat Beach), this picture addresses two issues perpetually at the forefront of salon and symposium discussions throughout the world: Are pterosaurs truly extinct, as left-leaning pseudo-science rags Smithsonian Magazine and National Geographic would have us believe, and, if not, are they breeding prodigiously in a volcano somewhere along the Turkish-Armenian border?
I intend to illustrate a few glaring errors made by the filmmakers, and perhaps educate the reader on the truth behind what have been called (in the film) "giant birds."
Fact One: The film was called "Pterodactyl," yet not one single pterodactyl was ever seen. What were those things, then, that flew around and sqawked and caused general disorder? Why, they were pteranodons! Pterodactyls (though that word is used quite commonly now to describe ALL pterosaurs) were slightly smaller, and lived in the late Triassic to Jurassic periods. Pteranodons lived in the Cretaceous period, the twilight years of the dinosaurs. Also, pteranodons bear the bony crest so evident on the creatures in the film.
Fact Two: Pterosaurs would NOT hunt land animals like humans. These were animals that lived near water and whose diet consisted mainly of fish. Pteranodons had NO teeth, in fact, and other pterosaurs, if they had any teeth at all, had only very small ones. These were not animals who would engage in predation on the scale that is depicted in the film.
Fact Three: Pterosaur eggs do NOT spontaneouly generate, nor can pterosaurs reach full adult size in a matter of a few hours. Once an animal has become extinct, it is highly unlikely that even something as cataclysmic as a volcanis eruption would cause new eggs to appear for no apparent reason. It is also improbable that any animal as complex as a pterosaur would reach physical maturity within one day.
Fact Four: As far as I can determine, there is no helmet being produced at the present time that can enable the wearer to telepathically control the direction of missiles and/or rockets.
Fact Five: As we were never treated to a scene of Muppet Girl's guts coming out (nor of any limb loss), we can assume she is still alive. All characters who perished due to pteranodons were seen clearly with their guts spilling out or their bodies being rent apart. All we saw in the case of Muppet Girl was her being carted off to the eyrie. Now, we also saw this in the case of Bulldog, who was later rescued, her bodacious bod perfectly intact. The question remains: What became of Muppet Girl? Was SHE the mysterious Tyrannosaur at the end of the film?
I guess the last one really wasn't a fact...
I intend to illustrate a few glaring errors made by the filmmakers, and perhaps educate the reader on the truth behind what have been called (in the film) "giant birds."
Fact One: The film was called "Pterodactyl," yet not one single pterodactyl was ever seen. What were those things, then, that flew around and sqawked and caused general disorder? Why, they were pteranodons! Pterodactyls (though that word is used quite commonly now to describe ALL pterosaurs) were slightly smaller, and lived in the late Triassic to Jurassic periods. Pteranodons lived in the Cretaceous period, the twilight years of the dinosaurs. Also, pteranodons bear the bony crest so evident on the creatures in the film.
Fact Two: Pterosaurs would NOT hunt land animals like humans. These were animals that lived near water and whose diet consisted mainly of fish. Pteranodons had NO teeth, in fact, and other pterosaurs, if they had any teeth at all, had only very small ones. These were not animals who would engage in predation on the scale that is depicted in the film.
Fact Three: Pterosaur eggs do NOT spontaneouly generate, nor can pterosaurs reach full adult size in a matter of a few hours. Once an animal has become extinct, it is highly unlikely that even something as cataclysmic as a volcanis eruption would cause new eggs to appear for no apparent reason. It is also improbable that any animal as complex as a pterosaur would reach physical maturity within one day.
Fact Four: As far as I can determine, there is no helmet being produced at the present time that can enable the wearer to telepathically control the direction of missiles and/or rockets.
Fact Five: As we were never treated to a scene of Muppet Girl's guts coming out (nor of any limb loss), we can assume she is still alive. All characters who perished due to pteranodons were seen clearly with their guts spilling out or their bodies being rent apart. All we saw in the case of Muppet Girl was her being carted off to the eyrie. Now, we also saw this in the case of Bulldog, who was later rescued, her bodacious bod perfectly intact. The question remains: What became of Muppet Girl? Was SHE the mysterious Tyrannosaur at the end of the film?
I guess the last one really wasn't a fact...