Robin Williams (1951-2014)
Let's get one thing straight: I am not a huge Robin Williams fan. I respected him. I was in awe of his talent. I even watched most of the episodes of his last tv series, "The Crazy Ones". It was a good series that only needed another year of nurturing in order to take off, IMO. But, his career sort of took off without me. I was not there at The Creation. Whatever it was I was doing or geeking out on in 1979, the year of his break-out appearance on "Happy Days", he was a full fledged comedy sensation by the time I was fully aware of his existence. So, why am I writing this?
I generally favor the older, the forgotten names, names that might come up on a game of Trivial Pursuit. Robin Williams was a different order of magnitude entirely. But, Like Michael Jackson's, his passing makes it all but impossible to move on to another topic without some comment. Something is bothering me about it. I guess this is less about someone dying than it is about the way they died. If, as my first thought had been confirmed, he had died of a massive heart attach or stroke, I don't think I would be writing this at all. None of us has a permanent lease on life. I would rent a copy of "Good Will Hunting" (actually, I think I have the dvd around here soewhere, still in its shrinkwrap) and I'd have a good cry.
Something about the fact of his suicide will now forever color every viewing as though this was his way of saying, "I told you I was sick."
I look back on it now and realize I have had a lot of friends who've had to deal with mental disease over the years. I've often wondered whether my own father was one of them. Half the people in ACTUP were probably clinically depressed much of the time. VRaptor. My last boyfriend, John Kudlak, was so depressed and chemically dependent at the time, he refused to seek treatment once his blood work came back positive for the virus.
The family of Robin Williams at least have the comfort of knowing of that his wealth and fame bought him a little bit of time. He tried everything. Like my longest living best friend, Dave Williams (no relation) Robin also had twenty years of sobriety. I don't feel sorry for Robin Williams, I think he made the most of the life God gave him. But, I am angry. I am angry about all the character parts he will never play, that we will never see his version King Lear.
So, I'm going to end this obituary a little difefrently. I'm not going to ask Mr. Williams to take a bow. I will ask, instead, that anyone reading this blog either as an avatar, a friend or just plain lurking, PICK UP A PHONE, post here as often and for as long as you want, call me if you know me in the material world. Let someone know you are in troubled waters and going down for the third time. You are important to me.
"If anyone you know, is struggling with thoughts of suicide, please immediately seek help. You can speak with a skilled, trained counselor at a national Suicide Prevention Lifeline crisis center in your area, anytime 24/7 - call 1-800-273-TALK (8255)."
I generally favor the older, the forgotten names, names that might come up on a game of Trivial Pursuit. Robin Williams was a different order of magnitude entirely. But, Like Michael Jackson's, his passing makes it all but impossible to move on to another topic without some comment. Something is bothering me about it. I guess this is less about someone dying than it is about the way they died. If, as my first thought had been confirmed, he had died of a massive heart attach or stroke, I don't think I would be writing this at all. None of us has a permanent lease on life. I would rent a copy of "Good Will Hunting" (actually, I think I have the dvd around here soewhere, still in its shrinkwrap) and I'd have a good cry.
Something about the fact of his suicide will now forever color every viewing as though this was his way of saying, "I told you I was sick."
I look back on it now and realize I have had a lot of friends who've had to deal with mental disease over the years. I've often wondered whether my own father was one of them. Half the people in ACTUP were probably clinically depressed much of the time. VRaptor. My last boyfriend, John Kudlak, was so depressed and chemically dependent at the time, he refused to seek treatment once his blood work came back positive for the virus.
The family of Robin Williams at least have the comfort of knowing of that his wealth and fame bought him a little bit of time. He tried everything. Like my longest living best friend, Dave Williams (no relation) Robin also had twenty years of sobriety. I don't feel sorry for Robin Williams, I think he made the most of the life God gave him. But, I am angry. I am angry about all the character parts he will never play, that we will never see his version King Lear.
So, I'm going to end this obituary a little difefrently. I'm not going to ask Mr. Williams to take a bow. I will ask, instead, that anyone reading this blog either as an avatar, a friend or just plain lurking, PICK UP A PHONE, post here as often and for as long as you want, call me if you know me in the material world. Let someone know you are in troubled waters and going down for the third time. You are important to me.
"If anyone you know, is struggling with thoughts of suicide, please immediately seek help. You can speak with a skilled, trained counselor at a national Suicide Prevention Lifeline crisis center in your area, anytime 24/7 - call 1-800-273-TALK (8255)."