sooo much to say
So today, is March 5th. But it is the year 2006, I believe. Someone tell if I am wrong. We could really be partying it up like its 1999 still. Anyways, there is a significance behind March 5th, and it isn't a pleasant one. Anyone care to guess? Any volunteers? Alright... Here we go.
March 5th, 2004. Jeremys in 10th grade. Grandma had been diagnosed with cancer a little over a year ago. She was told she has arounda year's time to live. So I'm in bed (at my old house) sleeping. Around 4 AM, I magically wake up, right before the phone begins to ring. Somehow, I just KNOW whats coming. About 30 seconds later, I hear my stepdad crying. I know she is gone. Arouns 2 hours later, Mom comes in to tell me, and says I can stay home from school, but I still go.
Its a death, everyone esperiences them right? Yeah, I know. But she was like the third or fourth, in only a handful of years. Not only that, but we were close. She was my gma through my stepdads side, and yet she was the only one to really understand, and notice how I was treated. She saw how different things were between me and my sister, and she was the only one. I remember visiting her at the canton high school library, when I was like 4. She means a lot to me.
And heading back into school, we had to do cancer projects. One of my best friends drew the card to do what kind of cancer she died of, like, one day prior. And she died 13(unlucky number) days before my bday. My bday was before a 3 day break, and I spent that whole break, at a funeral and such. And I sit here, 2 years later, still affected, and still hurting.
Moving on.
I didnt go to LC's surprise bday dinner. Why? Because I felt unwelcomed. I had received no calls over the past few days. And when I talked to her mom today, it was very cold. Like... wow. I was afraid. SO I didn't go. Everyone else went, and I waas stuck at home, when like ALL of my best friends were busy. Niiiiice. But I got her gifts. Jamie gave them to her. Jamie and I met at the mall and went shopping for Melissa and LC.
Um... Melissa and LC turn 16 tomorrow, on the 6th. I turn 18 on the 18th, and Matt turns 18 on the 20th. I could go into a list of like 10 other people, but they arent that important.
I think one of these days, I will type up a life story. Imagine it possibly being the longest entry you have ever seen. That is, if I ever do it. I just want to get it out you know? Things have been nagging at me lately. Like, some of my friends, choose not to be around much more. But others do. Some I am nervous around, and everything just seems so screwed up. I mean, Melissa is one of my best friends, and its like I cant even hang out with her. Seriously, wtf?
Bahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh gingers!