Purple Cactuses...Melt in your mouth, not in your hand...
One upon a time there was a purple cactus that had a face, and lived out in the desert. It was a sad & lonely cactus, and it was increadibly bored b/c it was stuck in the ground, and pretty much paralized as most plants R. 1 day, it was thinking of how bored it was till this increadibly dumb orange porcupine came, mistaked it for another porcupine, and humped it senseless. Alas the porcupine finally found it's 1 true unrequarted love. The cactus thought to itself, "I'm a cactus you idiotiotic pervert, get away from me!!!" but, to no avail. It didn't say these thingz b/c although it had lips, and teeth, and ect., it didn't have the vocal chords nessacairy to formulate such words, and furthermore the porcupine wouldn't understand anywayz, b/c it was increadibly stupid. Soon the cactus began to fall in love w/ the unvelievabley stupid porcupine, and it's funny stupid moronic wayz which proved to be quite entertaining. the Porcupine would do the can can canned candy cain pina colada dance, and the cactus would stand stuck in the ground, so moved it couldn't move. By then however, the porcupine had already found a new love, a pineaple by the name of Pinecones.