In a New York State of mind...
I have a boyfriend. his name is eric. and ummm....i dont think i like this.
even though he is fun, sweet, and cute...
i just am not getting that feeling. the feeling that you really want to be with that person for at least a little while and you want to be with them all the time and you miss them when they are gone.
i dont think im capable of having the feeling yet.
actually thats a lie...i felt that with someone else, but fucked it up....for a gay guy.
I dont know what i want. and i think thats becuz i dont know where im going or what im doing right now. im working on college applications...if i dont get into any schools im running away to NYC. i know so many people in music and the industry now, im bound to get some kind of work.
i cant worry about guys right now and i need to figure out what im doing cuz if im leaving its not worth being with anybody anyway.
i think i really need to get away. just be on my own for a bit. maybe even cut myself off from everyone. well not my mom or dayna...but everyone else. i think i will do that. like one day this weekend. just disappear. yeah...so dont call me saturday.
bye.
even though he is fun, sweet, and cute...
i just am not getting that feeling. the feeling that you really want to be with that person for at least a little while and you want to be with them all the time and you miss them when they are gone.
i dont think im capable of having the feeling yet.
actually thats a lie...i felt that with someone else, but fucked it up....for a gay guy.
I dont know what i want. and i think thats becuz i dont know where im going or what im doing right now. im working on college applications...if i dont get into any schools im running away to NYC. i know so many people in music and the industry now, im bound to get some kind of work.
i cant worry about guys right now and i need to figure out what im doing cuz if im leaving its not worth being with anybody anyway.
i think i really need to get away. just be on my own for a bit. maybe even cut myself off from everyone. well not my mom or dayna...but everyone else. i think i will do that. like one day this weekend. just disappear. yeah...so dont call me saturday.
bye.