"... Half Blood Prince" Movie
NO, I'M NOT LJ CUTTING THIS EPIC MONSTROSITY, your friend's lists be damned. I fully expect my own to be bulging with everyone else's accounts sooner or later. :)
We got in at four in the morning, and then I crashed, so I told myself I had to wait until tomorrow to talk about it. And it's tomorrow!
First of all, the theater was packed and my brother and I were forced to sit on the right side of the theater, right under one of the guide lights. LAME.
Once the movie started it wasn't that big of a deal, which I was thankful for.
I've never been to a midnight showing of a Potter Film - which, interesting note, was way more packed and rowdy than the Trek opening, go figure - so I didn't know whta to expect.
There were a fuckton of high-schoolers there, standing up in front of the theater, running races in the aisles against each other. WTF. Seriously, grow up.
... And then after I thought that I felt like a really crotchety old person as I remembered the shenanigans we used to pull in theaters during high school. Although, in our defense, we only did so in shitty movies, or theaters where there was barely anyone.
Also, there were these bitches behind me that kept putting their feet up on my seat. Like, I turned around and gave them The Look, and they put their feet down. But when I turned back around, they just put their feet back up. HELLO YOU ARE NOT THE CENTER OF THE UNIVERSE FRESHMEN.
Also also, there was this guy with a hilarious laugh, that would just laugh at random times during the movie, and then the rest of the theater would laugh just because he sounded so funny. Good times.
ANYWAY.
The movie opened with the paparazzi hounding Harry just after the "Voldemort is Back" scene at the end of Order of the Phoenix, and then Dumbledore's arm comes into frame, there's a closeup of his hand (REMEMBER IT IN ALL ITS PRISTINE GLORY), and he just leads him away ... after which we get the title screen. Very good opening, in my opinion. It's a nice way to gently remind the audience that this isn't a movie on it's own, it depends on the events that came before.
I'm not going to go for a play-by-play, because that would both be insanely hard and time-consuming, as I already feel everything jumbling about in my head, so here's a list of highlights:
- Before I get into anything, I just want to say that the movie was HILARIOUS, and there's no way I can capture or remember all the hilarity. You really need to see it yourself.
- Harry is reading the Daily Prophet in some Muggle cafe off the Underground, and apparently does that a lot, because him and this hot waitress have a conversation about how he's always around and she gets off at 11. And then Harry checks his breath and mouthes a Tic-Tac. Oh, Harry.
- As an offshoot of the previous point, the article he's reading is about the Malfoys being publicly shamed by Lucius' bullshittery at the Department of Mysteries last movie year. I started to love Helen McCrory as Narcissa in this moment, because she really looked the part in the photo.
- ... And then the Spinner's End scene happened and I was disappointed. All Narcissa did was get a little teary. She didn't fight with her sister, and Bella did most of the talking. I WANTED EPIC FLAILING! Where were Narcissa's Mommy-Powers-Of-Awesome? Are they trying to make her saving of Harry in the last book look more epically good by having nothing to compare it to? I don't know.
- Also, there's absolutely no way you could think Snape was alright with the Unbreakable Vow by watching Alan Rickman's face. And, interestingly, in That Other Scene That Happens Later. Not quite sure how I feel about that yet.
- Whoever that girl is who plays Lavender Brown (ETA: Jessie Cave) was SO FUCKING HILARIOUS. There's this whole scene where they're on the train for Christmas holidays, and she draws this elaborate "R + L 4 EVA" heart in breath on the window, and then mouthes, "I MISS YOU." HAHAHA WTH. And Ron just looks totally disgusted.
- Speaking of Lavender, there's also the Hermione Cries scene that was really well done, and a hilarious fight between Lavender and Hermione after Ron drinks the poisoned mead. :)
- OMG. My favourite scene is this thirty-second clip where Filch is checking the student's luggage, and he tries to confiscate Lucius' pimp cane, which Draco has brought with him in remembrance (AWWWWW) and Draco's all, "IT'S NOT A (whatever Filch accuses him of having, I couldn't hear), IT'S A WALKING STICK!" And then he cuddles it. (FUCKING AWWWWWWWWWWWW). I loved it so much, you have no idea.
- My second favourite scene is when Harry is asking Katie Bell who cursed her, and she says it's driving her nuts but she cant remember, and then she sees Draco and freezes. And then Draco freezes, looking scared and like he feels like an asshole. And Harry turns. And Draco bolts, Harry in hot pursuit. VERY WELL DONE MOVIE, KTHX.
- Sectumsempra scene needed more blood. And more emo tears. And more Moaning Myrtle! Draco/Myrtle BFFs for life, WTF MOVIE! You're letting me down!
- They added this scene where Fenrir and Bellatrix attack the Burrow for no reason. But it was cinematically pretty cool looking. It all boiled down to, "We don't like you guys! Fuck you!" And then the Weasleys just stand around looking sad.
- The death was epic. Honestly, a little TOO epic. They did the slow-motion fall and everything. Not sure how I feel about that, either. I think it cheapened it a little.
- I got all teary in the end when the entire school is staring by his body at the bottom of the tower. And they all flick their Bics ... uh, wands ... in tribute. It was pretty awesome.
- DRACO. THE WHOLE MOVIE. WAS SO AWESOME. Every time the movie was getting a little too lighthearted, we'd cut to a scene of Draco fiddling with the Vanishing Cabinet. Or, the characters would be walking around talking about amusing things, and then Draco would be there off to the left looking emo. Ron and Lavender are kissing? Oh, wait, PLEASE REMEMBER THAT DRACO IS UP TO SOME SHIT. <3
- And, as Cleo has said, there is actually no purpose to sneaking in the Death Eaters as far as the movie is concerned, because the only things done are by Bellatrix, and basically just support her need for destruction, while she blows everything up and sets everything on fire, cackling with glee. Which I loved, by the way.
- And they actually gave Draco the Dark Mark! Which, as I recall, was hinted at but never specifically stated in the book. I saw the picture a couple days ago in EW and was filled with a Godzilla-like rage. It had cooled by the time I saw the movie, but I was still mildly annoyed. I'd like to think Draco was conflicted enough that he wouldn't have wanted that, but maybe that's just because I know he turns out alright and I'm just projecting my enjoyment of his character a little too far.
In parting news, I think it was the best one yet. Even my brother, who I forced to go with me and who constantly professes that he hates Harry Potter, admitted that he thought the movie was very well done.
ETA 2: Oh, and we've broken the Dark Night's record, apparently!
ETA 3: Oh, I'm sorry, NOW IT'S 58 MILLION WTF. I have no words. Really? REALLY?
We got in at four in the morning, and then I crashed, so I told myself I had to wait until tomorrow to talk about it. And it's tomorrow!
First of all, the theater was packed and my brother and I were forced to sit on the right side of the theater, right under one of the guide lights. LAME.
Once the movie started it wasn't that big of a deal, which I was thankful for.
I've never been to a midnight showing of a Potter Film - which, interesting note, was way more packed and rowdy than the Trek opening, go figure - so I didn't know whta to expect.
There were a fuckton of high-schoolers there, standing up in front of the theater, running races in the aisles against each other. WTF. Seriously, grow up.
... And then after I thought that I felt like a really crotchety old person as I remembered the shenanigans we used to pull in theaters during high school. Although, in our defense, we only did so in shitty movies, or theaters where there was barely anyone.
Also, there were these bitches behind me that kept putting their feet up on my seat. Like, I turned around and gave them The Look, and they put their feet down. But when I turned back around, they just put their feet back up. HELLO YOU ARE NOT THE CENTER OF THE UNIVERSE FRESHMEN.
Also also, there was this guy with a hilarious laugh, that would just laugh at random times during the movie, and then the rest of the theater would laugh just because he sounded so funny. Good times.
ANYWAY.
The movie opened with the paparazzi hounding Harry just after the "Voldemort is Back" scene at the end of Order of the Phoenix, and then Dumbledore's arm comes into frame, there's a closeup of his hand (REMEMBER IT IN ALL ITS PRISTINE GLORY), and he just leads him away ... after which we get the title screen. Very good opening, in my opinion. It's a nice way to gently remind the audience that this isn't a movie on it's own, it depends on the events that came before.
I'm not going to go for a play-by-play, because that would both be insanely hard and time-consuming, as I already feel everything jumbling about in my head, so here's a list of highlights:
- Before I get into anything, I just want to say that the movie was HILARIOUS, and there's no way I can capture or remember all the hilarity. You really need to see it yourself.
- Harry is reading the Daily Prophet in some Muggle cafe off the Underground, and apparently does that a lot, because him and this hot waitress have a conversation about how he's always around and she gets off at 11. And then Harry checks his breath and mouthes a Tic-Tac. Oh, Harry.
- As an offshoot of the previous point, the article he's reading is about the Malfoys being publicly shamed by Lucius' bullshittery at the Department of Mysteries last movie year. I started to love Helen McCrory as Narcissa in this moment, because she really looked the part in the photo.
- ... And then the Spinner's End scene happened and I was disappointed. All Narcissa did was get a little teary. She didn't fight with her sister, and Bella did most of the talking. I WANTED EPIC FLAILING! Where were Narcissa's Mommy-Powers-Of-Awesome? Are they trying to make her saving of Harry in the last book look more epically good by having nothing to compare it to? I don't know.
- Also, there's absolutely no way you could think Snape was alright with the Unbreakable Vow by watching Alan Rickman's face. And, interestingly, in That Other Scene That Happens Later. Not quite sure how I feel about that yet.
- Whoever that girl is who plays Lavender Brown (ETA: Jessie Cave) was SO FUCKING HILARIOUS. There's this whole scene where they're on the train for Christmas holidays, and she draws this elaborate "R + L 4 EVA" heart in breath on the window, and then mouthes, "I MISS YOU." HAHAHA WTH. And Ron just looks totally disgusted.
- Speaking of Lavender, there's also the Hermione Cries scene that was really well done, and a hilarious fight between Lavender and Hermione after Ron drinks the poisoned mead. :)
- OMG. My favourite scene is this thirty-second clip where Filch is checking the student's luggage, and he tries to confiscate Lucius' pimp cane, which Draco has brought with him in remembrance (AWWWWW) and Draco's all, "IT'S NOT A (whatever Filch accuses him of having, I couldn't hear), IT'S A WALKING STICK!" And then he cuddles it. (FUCKING AWWWWWWWWWWWW). I loved it so much, you have no idea.
- My second favourite scene is when Harry is asking Katie Bell who cursed her, and she says it's driving her nuts but she cant remember, and then she sees Draco and freezes. And then Draco freezes, looking scared and like he feels like an asshole. And Harry turns. And Draco bolts, Harry in hot pursuit. VERY WELL DONE MOVIE, KTHX.
- Sectumsempra scene needed more blood. And more emo tears. And more Moaning Myrtle! Draco/Myrtle BFFs for life, WTF MOVIE! You're letting me down!
- They added this scene where Fenrir and Bellatrix attack the Burrow for no reason. But it was cinematically pretty cool looking. It all boiled down to, "We don't like you guys! Fuck you!" And then the Weasleys just stand around looking sad.
- The death was epic. Honestly, a little TOO epic. They did the slow-motion fall and everything. Not sure how I feel about that, either. I think it cheapened it a little.
- I got all teary in the end when the entire school is staring by his body at the bottom of the tower. And they all flick their Bics ... uh, wands ... in tribute. It was pretty awesome.
- DRACO. THE WHOLE MOVIE. WAS SO AWESOME. Every time the movie was getting a little too lighthearted, we'd cut to a scene of Draco fiddling with the Vanishing Cabinet. Or, the characters would be walking around talking about amusing things, and then Draco would be there off to the left looking emo. Ron and Lavender are kissing? Oh, wait, PLEASE REMEMBER THAT DRACO IS UP TO SOME SHIT. <3
- And, as Cleo has said, there is actually no purpose to sneaking in the Death Eaters as far as the movie is concerned, because the only things done are by Bellatrix, and basically just support her need for destruction, while she blows everything up and sets everything on fire, cackling with glee. Which I loved, by the way.
- And they actually gave Draco the Dark Mark! Which, as I recall, was hinted at but never specifically stated in the book. I saw the picture a couple days ago in EW and was filled with a Godzilla-like rage. It had cooled by the time I saw the movie, but I was still mildly annoyed. I'd like to think Draco was conflicted enough that he wouldn't have wanted that, but maybe that's just because I know he turns out alright and I'm just projecting my enjoyment of his character a little too far.
In parting news, I think it was the best one yet. Even my brother, who I forced to go with me and who constantly professes that he hates Harry Potter, admitted that he thought the movie was very well done.
ETA 2: Oh, and we've broken the Dark Night's record, apparently!
ETA 3: Oh, I'm sorry, NOW IT'S 58 MILLION WTF. I have no words. Really? REALLY?