coming down from it all.....
K, so I had the last four days off to find a job... It didn't go as well as planned, but I found a couple jobs that I thought would be really great to do.... ANd now I just have to wait and pray... Everything is too good to be true...always. Then I have to think about following up, and getting through to the HR. Its all such a sick game. ANd today I have to go back to work. Im not too upset about that, and yet, I still could not get out of bed this morning. My mind is so flooded with all this job stuff, and not getting as much done these last days as I could have. Not to mention pay day is coming and the money has long been spent, and Matt is sick with some stomach thing, and he was trying to put in for a promotion again. They say they don't take health into account, i don't care that everyone else is sick too, it looks soo much worse when its him. I guess all the hopeful optimism that I have been holding onto this last week has just gone and left me deflated. Valentines has come and gone and left a big bill. I was really hoping that this time they bosses would give him a second chance, but once again illness has taken that away from me too. For days after trying to get my life in order, I find that maybe the apartment is a little cleaner and the cats are a little happier, but my life if anything has become even more stunted and sad. Not to mention Im headed to my moms where I must soothe her anxiousness about taxes and my sisters idiocy, despite my internal turmoil. ANd Im already late, go figure. Ive been up for an hour, and it begins.