Why am I gaining weight on the new diet?

It's never the right day for intense neck pain.

Ah, laryngitis, my old friend...

The thing about caloric reduction is that you're not supposed to binge on chocolate just before bed.

Losing weight would be much easier if I weren't so averse to the fainting spells.

Rising early to exercise results in sleepy exercise.

The web is a great source of medical information, making your fiction much more grounded and realistic. Leave the real-world diagnoses to the professionals, however.

When your biggest complaint about a medical test is the sticky residue on your chest, it really wasn't a big deal.

Some days eating healthy is no big deal. Some days you obsess about how to make chocolate-covered bacon for breakfast.

Based on a 2,000-calorie diet and my current BMI, I estimate that I don't actually have to eat anything for the next three months.