I swear I just use this site to make lists
Anyway here are some more 'gems'
Things little kids have right:
1) Bathroom humor is hilarious.
2) The cookie that fell on the floor still tastes fantastic.
3) If you don't get your way at first shouting can be quite effective.
4) Some food is better thrown than eaten. (Key categories here include members of the brassica family, fruitcake, and meat products where the animal they came from cannot be determined).
5) Grandma's new boyfriend really is an idiot.
6) There is no such thing as an inappropriate occasion for superhero outfits. (A towel cape will do in a pinch if your family didn't love you enough to buy you an actual superhero outfit).
7) Sharing is overrated.
Quotes I've been known to use that come across as somewhat psychopathic
1) "Stolen food always tastes better"
2) "I'm trying to save money so now I don't buy my own drinks"
3) "Good aim and bad intentions accomplishes a lot more than the other way around."
4) "Good girls get into heaven bad girls get in everywhere".
5) "When in a disagreement always take the higher ground - it's easier to piss on your opponent's head from up there."
6) "A good friend will bail you out of jail while your best friend sits in the cell with you saying 'wow, that was crazy'".
7) "Well behaved women rarely make history" -Emma Goldman
8) "Men are like dogs the only difference between a smart one and a dumb one is that a smart one can figure out how to get into the garbage."
9) "Eagles may soar but weasels don't get sucked into jet engines."
10) "It's better to ask forgiveness than permission." -My Mom
Things little kids have right:
1) Bathroom humor is hilarious.
2) The cookie that fell on the floor still tastes fantastic.
3) If you don't get your way at first shouting can be quite effective.
4) Some food is better thrown than eaten. (Key categories here include members of the brassica family, fruitcake, and meat products where the animal they came from cannot be determined).
5) Grandma's new boyfriend really is an idiot.
6) There is no such thing as an inappropriate occasion for superhero outfits. (A towel cape will do in a pinch if your family didn't love you enough to buy you an actual superhero outfit).
7) Sharing is overrated.
Quotes I've been known to use that come across as somewhat psychopathic
1) "Stolen food always tastes better"
2) "I'm trying to save money so now I don't buy my own drinks"
3) "Good aim and bad intentions accomplishes a lot more than the other way around."
4) "Good girls get into heaven bad girls get in everywhere".
5) "When in a disagreement always take the higher ground - it's easier to piss on your opponent's head from up there."
6) "A good friend will bail you out of jail while your best friend sits in the cell with you saying 'wow, that was crazy'".
7) "Well behaved women rarely make history" -Emma Goldman
8) "Men are like dogs the only difference between a smart one and a dumb one is that a smart one can figure out how to get into the garbage."
9) "Eagles may soar but weasels don't get sucked into jet engines."
10) "It's better to ask forgiveness than permission." -My Mom