Hurricane Jessie

Sep 25, 2008 09:22

He made a damn list. One of those lists that girls usually make with everything they can dream of for the perfect lover.

I guess I'm standing so close he can't see me.

But I'm just a girl to him.

So maybe I deserve better. Maybe he is the jack ass I accuse him of being all the time.

But you can't always help who you fall for.

It's like a hurricane is inside. Kendyl sensed it. Eric sensed it. Maybe that wasn't the reason the relationship ended with them, but I'm sure it didn't help.

I ended up at his house the other night and we were drowning our sorrows together. Maybe not the best idea with someone you are in denial about and rum to accompany you. I ended up in his bed, ASLEEP, and he ended up next to me. It wasn't like what you are probably assuming right now. It was just sweet. I needed to feel someone in bed next to me, someone keeping me warm, someone holding me...

I know he felt nothing, but at that moment I could no longer be in denial.

I have accepted it. I am just the girl he calls when other girls break his heart. I am just the girl that he can be himself with and not worry what I think. I am just the girl who will never admit any of this to him and continue being that friend.

I'll never tell him. 
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