Viviamo ed impariamo.
Originally published at lianhua.nu. Please leave any comments there.
I’m not sure what to think of the world today.
I stumbled onto the blog of a fourteen year old girl today while going through my Despair commenting rounds. Normally, that’s no big deal - I’ve seen a huge age range on Despair and it’s never bothered me. However, this one was just… off. The first entry was about how she got high and one of her friends got completely drunk/wasted/high and together they took a bus to another friend’s house, and about how she was embarrassed because her friends were talking about how drunk they were going to get, etc. Sprinkle that with a bunch of cursing, negativity, anger, and you’ve got her blog entry, essentially (summing things up, of course). Well, since I needed to comment, I thought, I’ll just comment on a different entry. However, there are only six entries in her blog at the moment, since she just started/restarted it a few weeks ago. Every single entry was about getting wasted, about hating something or the other or someone, and just full of general negativity. Every. single. entry.
What is going on with the world?!
Since when is it okay/acceptable/normal for a fourteen year old girl to get totally wasted like this, and have such a horrible attitude and outlook on life?
I mean, yeah I was a pretty emotional and angry girl at fourteen. I’ll give you that. But I never cursed like this, just out in the open for everyone - including relatives - to find and read. That’s not even what upset me, though. People are just angry, and I guess I can accept that, even if that’s not how I work at all.
What really upset me was how casual and nonchalant she was about her issues with drugs and alcohol. I mean, she’s fourteen. Where is she even getting all this crap that she’s putting into her body like this? Does she even understand what it can do to your life? I’ve seen firsthand what it can do to a person’s life. Sure, you feel pretty good when you’re doing it, but there’s inevitably a big mess you have to clean up afterwards - physical, mental, emotional… there’s going to be a mess.
Now, before I sound like some kind of anti-drug puritan…
Last night, Sean and I went out with Emily, Warlock and Angel to Byte, at the Delancey down in Manhattan. It was amazing - so much fun, so many laughs. But what’s also amazing was that none of us felt the need to be totally wasted or even obscenely drunk to have that kind of fun. Emily and I each had two drinks (I had two bloodbaths - red wine, cranberry juice and Chambord raspberry liqueur - and Emily had one bloodbath and a vodka and redbull), Sean didn’t drink anything since he’s sick and Angel and Warlock both had a few beers. No big deal. But we had an incredible amount of fun - before, during and after Byte. Despite the fact that alcohol was everywhere, and cheap ($5 for a bloodbath or vodka redbull). And no one else at Byte seemed insanely drunk, either. Everyone could stand on their own, no one was throwing up (that I know of, anyway)… We were all adults about it.
And that’s the big difference, really. That is why there are age limits and laws against minors using these kinds of substances. I do believe that some of the limits and laws are a little too strict, but there has to be some kind of moderation. If you can’t figure out how to moderate your intake yourself, then you need someone to moderate it for you. And I think that while you are under the age of eighteen (in this country), still living with your parents, not yet finished with high school and still dependent on someone to meet your basic needs, you are not able to moderate your own intake. Once you’re out on your own, by all means, do whatever you want to screw up your own life. It’s not anyone else’s problem then - just yours. But while you’re living with your parents, it’s their problem too. I mean, what happens if you get caught?
Was it just that I was so sheltered in high school, that I didn’t see all of this going on? No, that’s not true. I’m pretty sure I knew all of it was going on, but it was something that no one really talked about - at least, not on their blogs, out in the open - because, if they partook, they didn’t want to get caught. And for me, at fourteen, there were a ton of other things on my mind… Okay, so it was mostly boys and school, but still. At that age, boys and school can’t ruin your life nearly as badly as drugs and alcohol can at any age.
I guess it takes a life-shattering experience for some people to realize the faults of what they’re doing. Honestly, I prefer to think ahead a bit more than that, and I prefer to know my limits before I reach them.