(no subject)
"You never left me, you never let me see what this feeling means"
The crazy thoughts that pass through my mind. It's like one minuet I'm excited. The next I'm down and out.
I am just thinking out side of the box again.
I mean I can't let all of my fears get to me correct? Sure some of the fears can be put aside, but only for a moment... then with time I will have to face up to those fears. It doesn't mean that I have to welcome them with open arms either. I would rather get hit by them with a surpise attack rather then knowning that something is going to happen. You can only go so far before you self destruct right? It's like no matter what goes on in life you will either know whats going to happen, or get hit with an suprise attack. Which would you rather have? I would rather have the suprise attack.
Yes that was random huh? Don't know if it made much sense... but hey it's all good...
"Keep yourself far away from me and I will forever stay your perfect enemy"
Just one of the many few quotes that I love.
It seems like I don't know anyone any more... Hell I'm begging to think that I don't know my best friend... I rarely see anyone... It seems like I am too good for them anymore. Which isn't the case. I'm not better than anyone... And no one is better than me.
It's weird bcuz I was thinking about this the other night... Jason has changed alot... like he seems to distant himself. Not just from me... but from everyone... It's like ever since he got his 'new' roommate... he's been too good for us as well. I mean yes he comes up to Saginaw on the weekends, but when he goes out he's either A) listening to his MP3 player, B) Talking on the phone. I understand that he's 'fed up' with this whole Gay thing.. but it's like um if you are fed up with it then why do you go out with a bunch of fags? Thats what I don't understand. Then he judges people before he really talks to them... Like Tyler for example he said he didn't like him bcuz he was 'too' gay, and he seemed like a Drama Queen. We're all fucking drama queens, so does that mean he don't like us either? I mean think about it... WTF? You know so what if he is a lil too gay.. but he's a cool kid. Then he's on this whole 'straight' thing... I understand he wants to experience the female body and what not... but why don't you just do it and get it over with? I mean don't be so picky... I'm also not saying that you need to be with the ugliest bitch out there, but you know pick a side and stay on it. Seriously... eh.. I better stop now.
"Life makes no sense to me"
I guess I dunno anything or anyone for that matter. It's like I have to wait for the last minuet to hear everything. Why? I mean have I fucked things up that bad? to the point where no one wants to tell me anything? I don't understand it... I feel like I really don't have friends anymore. They are more like people I talk to when I see them to catch up to them. Is that fucked up or what? I mean I still have the love for them as I always have and I worry about them alot. Sometimes more than my own life. Yes my life is the main thing I worry about anymore, but I still worry about everyone.
Well Im done bitching now...
The crazy thoughts that pass through my mind. It's like one minuet I'm excited. The next I'm down and out.
I am just thinking out side of the box again.
I mean I can't let all of my fears get to me correct? Sure some of the fears can be put aside, but only for a moment... then with time I will have to face up to those fears. It doesn't mean that I have to welcome them with open arms either. I would rather get hit by them with a surpise attack rather then knowning that something is going to happen. You can only go so far before you self destruct right? It's like no matter what goes on in life you will either know whats going to happen, or get hit with an suprise attack. Which would you rather have? I would rather have the suprise attack.
Yes that was random huh? Don't know if it made much sense... but hey it's all good...
"Keep yourself far away from me and I will forever stay your perfect enemy"
Just one of the many few quotes that I love.
It seems like I don't know anyone any more... Hell I'm begging to think that I don't know my best friend... I rarely see anyone... It seems like I am too good for them anymore. Which isn't the case. I'm not better than anyone... And no one is better than me.
It's weird bcuz I was thinking about this the other night... Jason has changed alot... like he seems to distant himself. Not just from me... but from everyone... It's like ever since he got his 'new' roommate... he's been too good for us as well. I mean yes he comes up to Saginaw on the weekends, but when he goes out he's either A) listening to his MP3 player, B) Talking on the phone. I understand that he's 'fed up' with this whole Gay thing.. but it's like um if you are fed up with it then why do you go out with a bunch of fags? Thats what I don't understand. Then he judges people before he really talks to them... Like Tyler for example he said he didn't like him bcuz he was 'too' gay, and he seemed like a Drama Queen. We're all fucking drama queens, so does that mean he don't like us either? I mean think about it... WTF? You know so what if he is a lil too gay.. but he's a cool kid. Then he's on this whole 'straight' thing... I understand he wants to experience the female body and what not... but why don't you just do it and get it over with? I mean don't be so picky... I'm also not saying that you need to be with the ugliest bitch out there, but you know pick a side and stay on it. Seriously... eh.. I better stop now.
"Life makes no sense to me"
I guess I dunno anything or anyone for that matter. It's like I have to wait for the last minuet to hear everything. Why? I mean have I fucked things up that bad? to the point where no one wants to tell me anything? I don't understand it... I feel like I really don't have friends anymore. They are more like people I talk to when I see them to catch up to them. Is that fucked up or what? I mean I still have the love for them as I always have and I worry about them alot. Sometimes more than my own life. Yes my life is the main thing I worry about anymore, but I still worry about everyone.
Well Im done bitching now...