Sunny Road
JKR hands MuggleNet early preview of Encyclopedia
At this early hour Tuesday morning, we are excited to inform everyone that the author of the Harry Potter novels has just passed along an early copy of her upcoming Encyclopedia!
We're currently paging through it and will be doing so over the next few hours. Once we're finished, we're going to spend all day posting some of the most interesting tidbits. Stay tuned!!!
Hogwarts groundskeeper a smash hit on FOX reality show
After years of tending to Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry, everyone’s favorite half-giant is making a name for himself on television. Are You Smarter Than Rubeus Hagrid? airs every Wednesday night at 9 p.m. ET on FOX.
Host Jeff Foxworthy said the show is a great success and is nearing the viewership of hit reality TV show American Idol. While the contestants tend to outwit Hagrid on the Q&A section, the hands-on portion of the show where they are asked to tame a Blast-Ended Skrewt, usually show that Rubeus ain’t as dumb as he looks.
Kreacher successful in White House run
Further complicating an election that was filled with heavy racial and gender undertones, the House-Elf from the Harry Potter series made a lot of noise when he began to pursue and eventually win the Democratic Presidential nomination. The House-Elf defeated his opponent Alan Keyes in a landslide victory. Although he is not a natural born citizen of the United States and thus not technically eligible to run, Kreacher decided, after his display of heroism and show of solidarity to Harry Potter in the famous Battle of Hogwarts, that it was time to step out of the shadows and make a name for himself and ensure all House-Elves are represented in Congress.
When meeting Kreacher for the first time at his inauguration, President George Bush said, "You're free. And freedom is beautiful. We will prevail against the forces of tyranny and evil - against those who hate our freedom."
Kreacher, completely dumbfounded, responded by saying, “How dare he address Kreacher this way,” and proceeded to take out a saucepan and repeatedly hit the former president over the head. Bush’s doctors said shockingly, no damage was done.
Rowling reveals truth about Harry, Hermione
Author J.K. Rowling has revealed shocking new details concerning the relationship that existed between characters Harry Potter and Hermione Granger. Despite what many fans had considered overwhelming evidence to the contrary, according to the author the two characters shared a deep, lasting romantic bond for years, and eventually got married (ditching their respective spouses). Mr. Potter, she also revealed in a copy of her much-anticipated Potter Encyclopedia, is the father to all of Ms. Granger's children. Rowling added:
“I had to advance the plot somehow and putting the two of them together at that stage in their lives would have been too difficult from a literary perspective. They were in each other’s presence far too often, so Ginny had to suffice as Harry’s love interest.”
Delusional? I guess not.
Apple announces WiPhone, an all-in-one Wizard device
Apple, Inc. today introduced WiPhone, combining four products - a revolutionary mobile phone, a widescreen iPod with touch controls, a breakthrough Internet communications device, and a first-class spell encyclopedia. WiPhone introduces an entirely new user interface based on a large multi-touch display and wand recognition system allowing the user to control the device based on finger and wand movement.
"WiPhone is a revolutionary and magical product that is literally five years ahead of any other mobile Wizarding phone," says Steve Jobs, Apple's CEO. "Wizards are all born with two ultimate pointing devices - their fingers and their wands - and iPhone uses them both to create the most revolutionary user interface since the Accio spell."
WiPhone, to be released June 29th, 2008, will cost 103 galleons, 8 sickles, and 12 knuts. It will be available at Apple's two recently opened Wizard stores located in Hogsmeade and Diagon Alley.
Aberforth Dumbledore arrested for illegal goat trafficking
The younger brother of world-renowned wizard Albus Dumbledore was arrested this morning outside the Hog’s Head for his involvement in an underground illegal goat trafficking ring. Madam Rosmerta noticed an alarming number of goats walking limply around Hogsmeade one afternoon and decided to alert the Ministry.
It was later discovered that the goats who failed to show Aberforth considerable attention were fated to enter an outside pen, which served a holding area until they were taken underground at night and had various charms performed on them. The Ministry seized what looked to be plans for an undeground goat fighting league. A rather irritated Aberforth said it was his way of showing them "tough love" and the animals spoke to him in a way humans never could.