n00t is my crack dealer
1. You and Jesus go out to dinner - who pays?
He does, he's got a lot to answer for. Buying me dinner would be a good start.
I2. You suddenly have to flee the country and adopt an alias. What is it?
Corky Feldbaum.
3. Pick one state in the U.S. to get rid of permanently?
Mmm, they all deserve to exist. Alabama, Mississippi, Arkansas and Louisiana could try harder. Florida needs a makeover.
4. You wake up as the opposite gender what's the one thing you wanna try?
Pissing standing up.
5. Luke Skywalker or Han Solo?
Han, totally.
6. Toy you always wanted but never got as a child?
I can't think of anything exept the Easy Bake Oven. I eventually got to use a real oven so the fake one wasn't that interesting.
7. Top three celebrities you wanna do.
Viggo Mortenson, William Fichtner and Olivier Martinez.
8. What's an automatic deal breaker in a potential significant other?
Too many, here's a sampling: poor personal hygiene, obvious insanity, the inability to empathize with anyone, believing one has a sense of humor when one doesn't, an obsessive need to be paid attention to; I could go on but then I'd be sad. By the way, these became deal breakers.
9. What is the last movie you saw that actually scared you?
The Ring.
10. Stupidest thing you've ever said out loud?
"All those negros..." on a school bus full of said persons. Oy, so fucking stupid. I'll never live that down, ever.
11. You're sentenced to death and it's the morning of your execution, what do you want to eat?
Broiled lamb chops or braised short ribs, mmmm meat.
12. What's something that most people do that you've never done?
Balance their checkbooks, manage their finances, pay their bills on time, own property, work within a budget, create a budget, you know, like that.
13. Before you die you want to go to...?
Paris, Israel, The Grand Canyon, Yosemite, Viet Nam, Fiji, Goa, Bali and back to San Francisco.
14. Something you'd really like to do but probably won't ever be able to do?
Be a ballerina-gymnast-figure skater.
15. A wild animal you'd like to have as a pet?
Panther.
16. A drug you'll never try?
Heroin. I lived in the East Village from 1993 to 1998. Anything that can make make you detach from reality so much that you shit in public and then pass out standing up while bent at the waist never knowing it, isn't for me.
17. If you were an animal what would you be?
Kangaroo.
18. If you had to marry someone you knew at the age of 12 who would it be?
Andy Nietsche, we were kids together. We grew apart in adolesence but he probably turned out to be a mensch.
19. What's something most people don't know about you?
I can dance.
20. First celebrity crush?
Shaun Cassidy
21. What's a weapon to suit your personality, habits and abilities?
Poison stored in a large-stoned ring like Lucrecia Borgia had.
23. Favorite breakfast bread style (pancakes, waffles, toast etc...)?
Begian waffles.
24. Favorite parody movie?
A Mighty Wind.
25. Worst way to die?
Dysentery.
26. Grossest injury you've ever seen?
Anything in that Drivers Ed movie, Signal 30.
27. The worst injury you've ever had?
Getting knocked off my bike by a taxi.
28. Favorite thing about thanksgiving?
Making pumpkin pie.
29. Sport you hate the most?
Watching: soccer, so fucking boring, what's with this world cup shit? Playing: badmiton, totally frustrating.
30. What city in the U.S. do you want to visit?
San Francisco.
31. What's something you think would be sweet to know everything about?
How to truly be diplomatic.
32. Favorite Actor/Actress?
Miranda Richardson.
33. What's one phrase you absolutely detest?
"Not for nothing," what the fuck does that mean? If it's not for nothing then it must be for something. It it's for something, say what that is. Don't be so fucking obtuse. "Do you know what I mean..." repeated over and over. No, I don't know what you mean. You have to do a much better job of explaining yourself, fucktard.
34. What makes an awesome party?
Tasty hors d'ouvres, delightful company, good manners.
35. What's your material obsession?
Shoes.
36. What's something most would consider an insult but you like it said about you?
Bitch.
37. Favorite kind of dog?
Irish setter.
38. Favorite carnival food (everyone has one)?
Italian sausage.
39. Morning or night person?
Night.
40. Worst drunken/drugged up habit?
Fucking strangers, acting like you want to fuck strangers, drinking and dialing, blacking out. Nowadays I can black out but mostly I stick to drinking and texting.
41. Weirdest ebay purchase?
I don't make too many Ebay purchases.
42. Favorite food to eat when you're wasted?
Starch: french fries, pasta, pizza, bagels.
43. Its Saturday at 3am where are you?
Ususally on the freaking PATH train. Ugh, not pleasant.
44. Who's your favorite friend to go out with?
All my friends, they like going out (wasn't that diplomatic?).
45.Worst job you've ever had?
Prep cook at restaurant, not a happy time for me.
46. What's something your friends make fun of you for?
Complaining, repeating myself by complaining some more.
47. Favorite cereal?
Dry oat meal.
48. Book you could read repeatedly?
Erotic story anthologies.
49. What's the meanest thing you've ever done?
Anonomously sent flowers to someone who broke up with a co-worker I could not stand. The card attached read, "Congratulations on a job well done."
50. What was your best Halloween costume ever?
Barbecue chef and my best friend went as a cow. We won two costume contests that night.
He does, he's got a lot to answer for. Buying me dinner would be a good start.
I2. You suddenly have to flee the country and adopt an alias. What is it?
Corky Feldbaum.
3. Pick one state in the U.S. to get rid of permanently?
Mmm, they all deserve to exist. Alabama, Mississippi, Arkansas and Louisiana could try harder. Florida needs a makeover.
4. You wake up as the opposite gender what's the one thing you wanna try?
Pissing standing up.
5. Luke Skywalker or Han Solo?
Han, totally.
6. Toy you always wanted but never got as a child?
I can't think of anything exept the Easy Bake Oven. I eventually got to use a real oven so the fake one wasn't that interesting.
7. Top three celebrities you wanna do.
Viggo Mortenson, William Fichtner and Olivier Martinez.
8. What's an automatic deal breaker in a potential significant other?
Too many, here's a sampling: poor personal hygiene, obvious insanity, the inability to empathize with anyone, believing one has a sense of humor when one doesn't, an obsessive need to be paid attention to; I could go on but then I'd be sad. By the way, these became deal breakers.
9. What is the last movie you saw that actually scared you?
The Ring.
10. Stupidest thing you've ever said out loud?
"All those negros..." on a school bus full of said persons. Oy, so fucking stupid. I'll never live that down, ever.
11. You're sentenced to death and it's the morning of your execution, what do you want to eat?
Broiled lamb chops or braised short ribs, mmmm meat.
12. What's something that most people do that you've never done?
Balance their checkbooks, manage their finances, pay their bills on time, own property, work within a budget, create a budget, you know, like that.
13. Before you die you want to go to...?
Paris, Israel, The Grand Canyon, Yosemite, Viet Nam, Fiji, Goa, Bali and back to San Francisco.
14. Something you'd really like to do but probably won't ever be able to do?
Be a ballerina-gymnast-figure skater.
15. A wild animal you'd like to have as a pet?
Panther.
16. A drug you'll never try?
Heroin. I lived in the East Village from 1993 to 1998. Anything that can make make you detach from reality so much that you shit in public and then pass out standing up while bent at the waist never knowing it, isn't for me.
17. If you were an animal what would you be?
Kangaroo.
18. If you had to marry someone you knew at the age of 12 who would it be?
Andy Nietsche, we were kids together. We grew apart in adolesence but he probably turned out to be a mensch.
19. What's something most people don't know about you?
I can dance.
20. First celebrity crush?
Shaun Cassidy
21. What's a weapon to suit your personality, habits and abilities?
Poison stored in a large-stoned ring like Lucrecia Borgia had.
23. Favorite breakfast bread style (pancakes, waffles, toast etc...)?
Begian waffles.
24. Favorite parody movie?
A Mighty Wind.
25. Worst way to die?
Dysentery.
26. Grossest injury you've ever seen?
Anything in that Drivers Ed movie, Signal 30.
27. The worst injury you've ever had?
Getting knocked off my bike by a taxi.
28. Favorite thing about thanksgiving?
Making pumpkin pie.
29. Sport you hate the most?
Watching: soccer, so fucking boring, what's with this world cup shit? Playing: badmiton, totally frustrating.
30. What city in the U.S. do you want to visit?
San Francisco.
31. What's something you think would be sweet to know everything about?
How to truly be diplomatic.
32. Favorite Actor/Actress?
Miranda Richardson.
33. What's one phrase you absolutely detest?
"Not for nothing," what the fuck does that mean? If it's not for nothing then it must be for something. It it's for something, say what that is. Don't be so fucking obtuse. "Do you know what I mean..." repeated over and over. No, I don't know what you mean. You have to do a much better job of explaining yourself, fucktard.
34. What makes an awesome party?
Tasty hors d'ouvres, delightful company, good manners.
35. What's your material obsession?
Shoes.
36. What's something most would consider an insult but you like it said about you?
Bitch.
37. Favorite kind of dog?
Irish setter.
38. Favorite carnival food (everyone has one)?
Italian sausage.
39. Morning or night person?
Night.
40. Worst drunken/drugged up habit?
Fucking strangers, acting like you want to fuck strangers, drinking and dialing, blacking out. Nowadays I can black out but mostly I stick to drinking and texting.
41. Weirdest ebay purchase?
I don't make too many Ebay purchases.
42. Favorite food to eat when you're wasted?
Starch: french fries, pasta, pizza, bagels.
43. Its Saturday at 3am where are you?
Ususally on the freaking PATH train. Ugh, not pleasant.
44. Who's your favorite friend to go out with?
All my friends, they like going out (wasn't that diplomatic?).
45.Worst job you've ever had?
Prep cook at restaurant, not a happy time for me.
46. What's something your friends make fun of you for?
Complaining, repeating myself by complaining some more.
47. Favorite cereal?
Dry oat meal.
48. Book you could read repeatedly?
Erotic story anthologies.
49. What's the meanest thing you've ever done?
Anonomously sent flowers to someone who broke up with a co-worker I could not stand. The card attached read, "Congratulations on a job well done."
50. What was your best Halloween costume ever?
Barbecue chef and my best friend went as a cow. We won two costume contests that night.