(no subject)
how is it that life can deliver such crashing contradictions in such rapid succession on this one girl's poor tired brain? how can one night end in such camraderie, to have the next bring on that all to familiar barage of bitter, lonely tears? the joy of dancing, the peace of shared yoga practice, and the exhilieration of brand new kisses fills me up. and then the shame of irresposibilty, the regret of unwitting wrongdoing, the anger at being misled, and the hopelessness of solitude empty me right back out again. each day brings the full cycle of being crushed, then rejuvinated. i have been filled with hatred and bitterness and ended on a note of forgiveness and peace. a flood of love and togetherness fades into the desperation of desolation. i feel the branches of the oak inside me stretch out and pull my back straight and firm after they have allowed it to sag and shake with sobs. steel is made strong by being heated then cooled, heated then cooled, heated then cooled. . .