Delta Dawn of the Dead
So, I went to Jacksonville, Florida this past weekend for my friends, Sarah (centaurea) and Adam's (shaka_sulu) wedding. The wedding was beautiful and I had so much fun when I was in Florida. But everything about my trip that didn't take place in Florida was a bit of a nightmare. Therefore, I am separating my posts about the weekend into two different posts, because such a wonderful event doesn't deserve to be tainted by the horror show that was my trip there and back.
First of all, my boss asked me to ensure that my trip not require vacation time off because our we are up to our necks in our project right now and I am taking 7.5 vacation days at the end of the month. (Our software was originally scheduled to be released in July, and when I planned my fall trip, I figured that October would be a very good time to go. Our classes would be out of pilot and we would have completed any post-pilot revisions. I would undoubtedly be raring to go on a well-deserved vacation. That was the thinking in February when I requested my days off, made my reservations, and started planning with my parents. In May, our customer pushed the release date back to the November-December timeframe. Argh!) So, anyway, I booked a flight that would allow me to work nearly a full day and yet allow me time to see my friends on Friday evening. That flight had a 38 minutes layover in Atlanta. I was a bit nervous about that, but figured I could make it work. The return trip had a whopping 42 minute layover.
I decided to go all carry-on for the trip down because, while I trusted that I could make it to the connecting flight if there was no delay, I didn't trust my bag to make the transfer. I even bought a few new cosmetics and styling products so that they could fit in my 311 bag for liquids and gels. I also very cleverly picked an aisle seat as close to the front of the plane as I could get, so that I could debark quickly and slip into my seat late, if need be. The flight from Detroit to Atlanta was largely uneventful. I had picked up a sandwich at the deli of my favorite grocery store and ate half of that while I waited to board. It was kind of onion-y, so I didn't want to eat it on the plane. We landed on time and I sprinted for the underground tram between concourses. The DTW->ATL flight arrived at gate B07, and the ATL->JAX flight was boarding at gate E03. Not exactly close. I got to the gate and found they were boarding Zone 1, so I had time to use the restroom before my Zone 9 boarding group. At that point, everything was working exactly as planned.
The flight was overbooked, so they asked for two volunteers to go on the 8:55 flight in exchange for a $200 travel voucher. As usual, I was tempted, but didn't volunteer. Adam's family had invited me to the rehearsal dinner/party at River City Brewing Company and I wanted to see everyone, even though I'd be landing too late for the dinner part.
When I boarded the plane, I was greeted with "We have no more room for roll-aboards, so we'll have to check your bag." Crap! I'm actually not a fan of flying without checking my bags. I like to be unencumbered while I'm at the airport. Since I do 95% of my air travel alone, I can't just ask a travel buddy to keep an eye on my stuff while I run to the restroom, so I always have to wheel in my bag with me. I hate that. Also, I don't find hoisting an overstuffed suitcase into the overhead bin all that much fun. I would just as soon check my main bag and travel with the bare minimum under the seat. Unfortunately, most of my fellow travelers don't share my opinion- and with business travelers, I can really see why- so the bins get packed to the gills and your bag might get booted. Fortunately, the same flight attendant who took my info came by my seat and told me they'd found room for my bag in a bin in first class, but she wasn't sure exactly where.
This is where the problems start. The flight was scheduled to take off at 6:55 PM and land at 8:05 PM. Almost immediately, the captain announced that there was a problem with something called "the relay," and they had requested a replacement part. At 7:15 the captain announced that the part was coming, but when it was in place, they would have to restart the onboard systems which would take five minutes. I called my dad and told him my flight was delayed because of technical problems and not to expect my "I'm here!" phone call at the expected time. At 7:30 a mechanic came with the part and they restarted systems, but it didn't work. At 7:53, I sent a text message to Amy and Bill explaining the situation. A couple of minutes later, I called my brother and told him we were in the same state, for once, and that I was delayed and stuck on the plane at the gate. He said, "What are you doing flying Delta? Their shit always breaks." While I was on the phone with my brother, the flight attendants brought everyone water. I thought that was a bad sign. I also noticed that the first class people were being offered wine. I thought that I should get half a glass since my bag was in first class. It was easy to see up the aisle because the guy in the middle seat had both arm rests up and I was hanging over the armrest to get some space. I have a lot of sympathy for people in the center seat, but you'd best be keeping your arms out of my seat area and your knees out of my leg space. Guy crossed the line on both counts.
One mechanic suddenly became three with a second relay. The captain announced, "We are really trying to push to get this done in the next hour. The flight crew has been flying for 14 hours and in an hour we have to clock out." At 8:30 he announced that there might be an equipment change if they couldn't get the part working. "Equipment change" is a euphemism for "we can't get this damned plane fixed, so we're putting you on a different, non-broken plane. The new part didn't work, so they announced that there was a plane available and they were just waiting to find out which gate before letting us off the plane. That's right- we'd been on the plane, at the gate for two hours. At 8:58, I called my parents to let them know that I was finally off the plane and heading to the new gate. It was only at gate E20, so only at the other end of the concourse, not the other end of the terminal.
The new flight was scheduled to take off at 9:45, though the gate agent wasn't exactly sure if that was the correct time. That poor man looked overwhelmed by the sudden appearance of 186 cranky passengers at the gate. While we were waiting, I ate the other half of my sandwich and spent some time talking to Opinionated Expatriate Briton about politics, how 80% of "this country" is stupid (his opinion, not mine), and about how he used to work for my company many, many years ago. I think we overlapped a couple of years. That was a weird coincidence.
Anyway, I called my parents to let them know I was boarding at 9:41 PM. They called for Zone 1 to board, but the passengers had other ideas and we sort of rushed the boarding area in a stampede. The flight attendants didn't raise any objection. They knew. This time, I managed to get my suitcase into the overhead bin near my seat. The new plane took off to weary cheers at about 9:55, three hours later than scheduled. Not the worst delay ever, but certainly bad. I arrived in Jacksonville at 11:00 PM, tired and just wanting to get my car, check into my room and decompress. I thought wistfully of a cocktail or something, but didn't want to try to find a bottle of some kind. Luckily, when I got to my room, Sarah had dropped off a welcome bag that included a tiny bottle of Bacardi- possibly the most welcome of all!
Oh, and at the late hour we arrived in Jacksonville, there was only one ground crew on duty so there was a bit of a delay getting to the gate, too.
Then there were two days of happy times with old and new friends, and an absolutely gorgeous wedding of two perfectly matched people. More on that in a later, happy stuff only post.
On the return trip, I decided to check my bag, since it wasn't as imperative that I got my bag immediately. I debated putting my make-up bag in my carry-on "tote/purse," but decided I'd rather have a lighter bag. After leaving the New England people at their gate (and nabbing someone's tiny Bacardi bottle in case of delay), I headed to my gate to wait for my flight. I noticed an adjacent gate saying "JAX->ATL 2:20 CANCELLED." Gave me a twinge for a second, but my flight wasn't until 4:44, so I relaxed. When my boarding pass was scanned, I got a new seat assignment in a B seat, which freaked me out a little. I didn't understand why I had a new seat and that it appeared to be a center seat made me borderline disgruntled. But the change turned out to be a change of plane size. Instead of a 757, we got a 767, because they combined the 2:20 flight with the 4:44 flight. I was still in an aisle seat, and it was in one of the two seat aisles so I had a little extra room. (767s are laid out AB CDE FG.) I always try to get in a two seat aisle when I have a choice. There was video on the 767, but I'd left my MP3 player in my checked bag because the batteries were dead. Instead, I watched the moving map as we made the whopping 51 minute flight to Atlanta. About half an hour in, I realized that there was no charge for games and joined the trivia tournament. I had just enough time to get to 3rd place when we landed. If I'd been playing from the beginning, I could have been a contender for first. I had a lot of points to make up because I joined so late.
We were actually a couple of minutes earlier than scheduled and I was only one concourse over from my connecting flight with 42 minutes to make it, so I made a pit stop and got some Ben and Jerry's before boarding. Got to the gate just before they announced boarding for Zone 9. Woo! We pulled away from the gate about fifty feet, and instantly all the lights and fans went out. The guy next to me is a very frequent flier and he said, "I've never seen that happen before." We pulled back to the gate. I told Frequent Flier about Friday's ordeal and said if it doesn't get fixed in twenty minutes, I'm renting a car and driving back to Michigan. He asked if I'd mind if he tagged along (he was flying standby because his earlier flight had been canceled and his wife was ticked off). I told him he could keep me awake. But- hurrah! The repair worked just fine. The captain got on the PA to reassure us that the "little engine" that wasn't working only provides cabin power when you're on the ground but away from the gate and it was not essential to the flight and we'd be perfectly fine to fly. Which we were. A little turbulence, but an otherwise quiet flight.
I arrived in Detroit as scheduled and took my time walking to baggage claim. Turns out I needn't have bothered, because my bag had decided to take a later flight. That suitcase! First it's trying to get into first class without me, then it's deciding that it likes flying in the early morning instead of the evening. Honestly, it's not going anywhere for a few trips. So, I waited until the conveyor belt had stopped moving before going to baggage services to report my missing bag. There was one other couple whose bag was missing and I overheard the service rep say that their bag would be dropped off between 8:00 and 10:30 this morning. Okay, I thought, I'll have it dropped off at the office tomorrow. I'll be make-up free, but what are you gonna do? However, the service rep told me that my bag would be arriving around midnight and they would call to let me know when they were driving out. Crap! I'd have to give them my home address and get my bag in my jammies, all bleary-eyed in the wee, small hours. Instead of going to bed, I decided to watch some of the shows I missed last week. At 12:15, I'd heard not a peep, and I was falling asleep on the sofa, so I decided to go to bed, knowing that the phone could ring at any sleepy moment.
Instead, it rang at about 7:15 this morning. My bag was later than expected and was going to be delivered at around 9:30 AM. Double crap! I'd be at the office by then. I tried to get them to deliver it to my office, but that would be a different truck and driver, and they would have to unload my bag, locate the other truck and load it on that. So, I wrote a permission slip and my suitcase is supposed to be wrapped up in a plastic bag (it's kind of rainy today) and dropped off at my house. It will sit in the cold and wet October weather all day. I guess that'll teach it to disobey me.
So, yeah. I have no plans to fly Delta again any time soon.
First of all, my boss asked me to ensure that my trip not require vacation time off because our we are up to our necks in our project right now and I am taking 7.5 vacation days at the end of the month. (Our software was originally scheduled to be released in July, and when I planned my fall trip, I figured that October would be a very good time to go. Our classes would be out of pilot and we would have completed any post-pilot revisions. I would undoubtedly be raring to go on a well-deserved vacation. That was the thinking in February when I requested my days off, made my reservations, and started planning with my parents. In May, our customer pushed the release date back to the November-December timeframe. Argh!) So, anyway, I booked a flight that would allow me to work nearly a full day and yet allow me time to see my friends on Friday evening. That flight had a 38 minutes layover in Atlanta. I was a bit nervous about that, but figured I could make it work. The return trip had a whopping 42 minute layover.
I decided to go all carry-on for the trip down because, while I trusted that I could make it to the connecting flight if there was no delay, I didn't trust my bag to make the transfer. I even bought a few new cosmetics and styling products so that they could fit in my 311 bag for liquids and gels. I also very cleverly picked an aisle seat as close to the front of the plane as I could get, so that I could debark quickly and slip into my seat late, if need be. The flight from Detroit to Atlanta was largely uneventful. I had picked up a sandwich at the deli of my favorite grocery store and ate half of that while I waited to board. It was kind of onion-y, so I didn't want to eat it on the plane. We landed on time and I sprinted for the underground tram between concourses. The DTW->ATL flight arrived at gate B07, and the ATL->JAX flight was boarding at gate E03. Not exactly close. I got to the gate and found they were boarding Zone 1, so I had time to use the restroom before my Zone 9 boarding group. At that point, everything was working exactly as planned.
The flight was overbooked, so they asked for two volunteers to go on the 8:55 flight in exchange for a $200 travel voucher. As usual, I was tempted, but didn't volunteer. Adam's family had invited me to the rehearsal dinner/party at River City Brewing Company and I wanted to see everyone, even though I'd be landing too late for the dinner part.
When I boarded the plane, I was greeted with "We have no more room for roll-aboards, so we'll have to check your bag." Crap! I'm actually not a fan of flying without checking my bags. I like to be unencumbered while I'm at the airport. Since I do 95% of my air travel alone, I can't just ask a travel buddy to keep an eye on my stuff while I run to the restroom, so I always have to wheel in my bag with me. I hate that. Also, I don't find hoisting an overstuffed suitcase into the overhead bin all that much fun. I would just as soon check my main bag and travel with the bare minimum under the seat. Unfortunately, most of my fellow travelers don't share my opinion- and with business travelers, I can really see why- so the bins get packed to the gills and your bag might get booted. Fortunately, the same flight attendant who took my info came by my seat and told me they'd found room for my bag in a bin in first class, but she wasn't sure exactly where.
This is where the problems start. The flight was scheduled to take off at 6:55 PM and land at 8:05 PM. Almost immediately, the captain announced that there was a problem with something called "the relay," and they had requested a replacement part. At 7:15 the captain announced that the part was coming, but when it was in place, they would have to restart the onboard systems which would take five minutes. I called my dad and told him my flight was delayed because of technical problems and not to expect my "I'm here!" phone call at the expected time. At 7:30 a mechanic came with the part and they restarted systems, but it didn't work. At 7:53, I sent a text message to Amy and Bill explaining the situation. A couple of minutes later, I called my brother and told him we were in the same state, for once, and that I was delayed and stuck on the plane at the gate. He said, "What are you doing flying Delta? Their shit always breaks." While I was on the phone with my brother, the flight attendants brought everyone water. I thought that was a bad sign. I also noticed that the first class people were being offered wine. I thought that I should get half a glass since my bag was in first class. It was easy to see up the aisle because the guy in the middle seat had both arm rests up and I was hanging over the armrest to get some space. I have a lot of sympathy for people in the center seat, but you'd best be keeping your arms out of my seat area and your knees out of my leg space. Guy crossed the line on both counts.
One mechanic suddenly became three with a second relay. The captain announced, "We are really trying to push to get this done in the next hour. The flight crew has been flying for 14 hours and in an hour we have to clock out." At 8:30 he announced that there might be an equipment change if they couldn't get the part working. "Equipment change" is a euphemism for "we can't get this damned plane fixed, so we're putting you on a different, non-broken plane. The new part didn't work, so they announced that there was a plane available and they were just waiting to find out which gate before letting us off the plane. That's right- we'd been on the plane, at the gate for two hours. At 8:58, I called my parents to let them know that I was finally off the plane and heading to the new gate. It was only at gate E20, so only at the other end of the concourse, not the other end of the terminal.
The new flight was scheduled to take off at 9:45, though the gate agent wasn't exactly sure if that was the correct time. That poor man looked overwhelmed by the sudden appearance of 186 cranky passengers at the gate. While we were waiting, I ate the other half of my sandwich and spent some time talking to Opinionated Expatriate Briton about politics, how 80% of "this country" is stupid (his opinion, not mine), and about how he used to work for my company many, many years ago. I think we overlapped a couple of years. That was a weird coincidence.
Anyway, I called my parents to let them know I was boarding at 9:41 PM. They called for Zone 1 to board, but the passengers had other ideas and we sort of rushed the boarding area in a stampede. The flight attendants didn't raise any objection. They knew. This time, I managed to get my suitcase into the overhead bin near my seat. The new plane took off to weary cheers at about 9:55, three hours later than scheduled. Not the worst delay ever, but certainly bad. I arrived in Jacksonville at 11:00 PM, tired and just wanting to get my car, check into my room and decompress. I thought wistfully of a cocktail or something, but didn't want to try to find a bottle of some kind. Luckily, when I got to my room, Sarah had dropped off a welcome bag that included a tiny bottle of Bacardi- possibly the most welcome of all!
Oh, and at the late hour we arrived in Jacksonville, there was only one ground crew on duty so there was a bit of a delay getting to the gate, too.
Then there were two days of happy times with old and new friends, and an absolutely gorgeous wedding of two perfectly matched people. More on that in a later, happy stuff only post.
On the return trip, I decided to check my bag, since it wasn't as imperative that I got my bag immediately. I debated putting my make-up bag in my carry-on "tote/purse," but decided I'd rather have a lighter bag. After leaving the New England people at their gate (and nabbing someone's tiny Bacardi bottle in case of delay), I headed to my gate to wait for my flight. I noticed an adjacent gate saying "JAX->ATL 2:20 CANCELLED." Gave me a twinge for a second, but my flight wasn't until 4:44, so I relaxed. When my boarding pass was scanned, I got a new seat assignment in a B seat, which freaked me out a little. I didn't understand why I had a new seat and that it appeared to be a center seat made me borderline disgruntled. But the change turned out to be a change of plane size. Instead of a 757, we got a 767, because they combined the 2:20 flight with the 4:44 flight. I was still in an aisle seat, and it was in one of the two seat aisles so I had a little extra room. (767s are laid out AB CDE FG.) I always try to get in a two seat aisle when I have a choice. There was video on the 767, but I'd left my MP3 player in my checked bag because the batteries were dead. Instead, I watched the moving map as we made the whopping 51 minute flight to Atlanta. About half an hour in, I realized that there was no charge for games and joined the trivia tournament. I had just enough time to get to 3rd place when we landed. If I'd been playing from the beginning, I could have been a contender for first. I had a lot of points to make up because I joined so late.
We were actually a couple of minutes earlier than scheduled and I was only one concourse over from my connecting flight with 42 minutes to make it, so I made a pit stop and got some Ben and Jerry's before boarding. Got to the gate just before they announced boarding for Zone 9. Woo! We pulled away from the gate about fifty feet, and instantly all the lights and fans went out. The guy next to me is a very frequent flier and he said, "I've never seen that happen before." We pulled back to the gate. I told Frequent Flier about Friday's ordeal and said if it doesn't get fixed in twenty minutes, I'm renting a car and driving back to Michigan. He asked if I'd mind if he tagged along (he was flying standby because his earlier flight had been canceled and his wife was ticked off). I told him he could keep me awake. But- hurrah! The repair worked just fine. The captain got on the PA to reassure us that the "little engine" that wasn't working only provides cabin power when you're on the ground but away from the gate and it was not essential to the flight and we'd be perfectly fine to fly. Which we were. A little turbulence, but an otherwise quiet flight.
I arrived in Detroit as scheduled and took my time walking to baggage claim. Turns out I needn't have bothered, because my bag had decided to take a later flight. That suitcase! First it's trying to get into first class without me, then it's deciding that it likes flying in the early morning instead of the evening. Honestly, it's not going anywhere for a few trips. So, I waited until the conveyor belt had stopped moving before going to baggage services to report my missing bag. There was one other couple whose bag was missing and I overheard the service rep say that their bag would be dropped off between 8:00 and 10:30 this morning. Okay, I thought, I'll have it dropped off at the office tomorrow. I'll be make-up free, but what are you gonna do? However, the service rep told me that my bag would be arriving around midnight and they would call to let me know when they were driving out. Crap! I'd have to give them my home address and get my bag in my jammies, all bleary-eyed in the wee, small hours. Instead of going to bed, I decided to watch some of the shows I missed last week. At 12:15, I'd heard not a peep, and I was falling asleep on the sofa, so I decided to go to bed, knowing that the phone could ring at any sleepy moment.
Instead, it rang at about 7:15 this morning. My bag was later than expected and was going to be delivered at around 9:30 AM. Double crap! I'd be at the office by then. I tried to get them to deliver it to my office, but that would be a different truck and driver, and they would have to unload my bag, locate the other truck and load it on that. So, I wrote a permission slip and my suitcase is supposed to be wrapped up in a plastic bag (it's kind of rainy today) and dropped off at my house. It will sit in the cold and wet October weather all day. I guess that'll teach it to disobey me.
So, yeah. I have no plans to fly Delta again any time soon.