4337: Are You Gonna Waste My Time?
Sorry I been away so much! I just found myself streamlining the amount of time I spend on things, and Internet was a big one =p I mean, wow, I only had like ten posts in August? And that's WITHOUT my characteristic chronic deletion of posts I don't want saved anymore? Definitely trending downwards, particularly from when I posted at LEAST every other day but usually more.
Here's an apology pic, tho [what I'm apologizing for or even if it's actually an apology is up to your tastes]:
Also, if the subj. sounds hostile, it's not meant to be. While I *do* feel I've been cutting out a lot of chaff from my life, it's also somewhat indicative of the mindset I've been in lately [which partially got me into trouble, though I knew in the back of my mind it might but went through with it anyway out of a misguided sense of "this needs to happen and it's just me kicking the baby bird out of the nest"], not to mention kinda WHAT MY JOB IS at the moment [scanning in stuff before discarding it, to make space].
Which is a lot of words to say, "Am I gonna get that raise yet?"
To wit: Falco has casually mentioned--unfortunately not in writing, but in the usual course of her "thinking out loud" sort of way that's not entirely professional but I don't really have a place to tell her how to do her job so whateber--trying to get me a raise as part of the whole "I want to incentivize you to keep you on board so I don't have to hire someone else" thing she's doing [hiring is a big thing she needs but doesn't want to do], but it hasn't gone anywhere in the month-ish since she first mentioned it... which I've finally learned is just par for the course, particularly since Schreibertooth is still technically part-timing it as our president =p ostensibly until the other branch finishes closing up, but I still have my reservations about THIS branch remaining solvent.
I would love it if it does, particularly since Falco seems to be completely on-board with me learning specifically how to do what needs to be done for the job, vs. the unpalatable "prescribed method" [spend all that time and money going back to college to MAYBE learn what skills they want on the job, with the HUGE risk of me doing so to get ANOTHER degree in something I don't really want to do for the rest of my life anyway [or, I wouldn't mind it but I suck at it, which is the case with 3D animation]]. As I said--or at least thought I was suggesting by what I said--though, I'm too burned by this point to put too much stock in any position I have lasting as long as I want [i.e. until *I* choose to move on vs. am given the boot], regardless of how well I otherwise do my job.
Anyway, the NEW news is this came up again after going nowhere that I'm aware of, because Biker has ALREADY put in her two weeks' notice. Yes, ALREADY. I'm not sure how many of you are aware of how far it is from Manassas to Germantown, but that is her commute, and they [she and Falco] knew going into this that the position was contingent on how well Biker could tolerate it--not too well, apparently. Not that I can blame her when it's, one-way, 45 minutes at BEST and TWO HOURS at peak wanting-to-die traffic =(
BUT. But. Falco has already contacted YET ANOTHER ex-employee about getting hired back, and this person apparently was totally for the proposition, PLUS she already knows the job [was there from 2003-11 before The Layoffs], so I wouldn't have to train her like I had to train Biker. So more "I don't have to go through this interviewing process again!", though I sorta wonder why it was this other person wasn't Falco's first choice.
*shrug*
As I said, though, she mentioned more work that they want to give me, to which I brought up the whole "Are you gonna pay me more for it?" angle again. Yes, she's totally for incentivizing me to stay on [and I'm kinda settled in now to where the expectation of temporariness is wearing off, not to mention it's getting to where it looks respectable on my resumé], so it's really up to Schreibertooth realizing my value at the company, which was a problem when he was never around and Falco reported to Scrooge instead, diluting the information stream.
...
Bugs me that financial security* rides on someone who is only partially aware of what's going on, at best, but nevertheless has authority over everything. Hey, kinda sounds like my favourite elements of politics -.-
*Despite things, I'm still spending slightly more than I make, particularly since I'm putting well more than the minimum on my car payments just to reduce how much I'm paying overall =p but that's some of the "I'm being subsidized" mindset I'm stuck in having the parents I have--as frugal as they were in their and my childhood, they insulated me from knowing the value of money for so long that I still have a nebulous grasp on it, unfortunately... -_- But, I also had the misfortune of having friends I like whose efforts [of various types] I like to support, so that's a constant money drain =p although I do try to keep a vague cap on how much I give out at a time, reserving it for those who need it more immediately and/or haven't gotten anything in a while. [Or, who do a good Kickstarter, since putting a deadline on something tends to draw me in more quickly than stuff that'll be around for a while.]
So that's... stuff! I haven't been doing a lot else--unfortunately, I've cut back on walking [though my father's promised to bring their old exercise bike that's otherwise gathering dust], so I'm on the "Fuck you, I can't eat all these apples" diet now as a countermeasure in the meantime. I guess it's working?, 'cause my appetite's gone down a bit--I'm not really eating constantly like I was up until a month ago. Some of that was temporarily "Stirrer Stick Diet"--itself unintentionally a diet, but basically I was/am grinding my teeth and my dentist keeps complaining about that, so I kept a stirrer stick in my mouth to dissuade myself, and that had a side effect of taking my mind off food. [It also put a lot of strain on my jaw, though, so I'm on that "diet" significantly less now.]
I also found that "Plantation Mint" tea is almost tolerable to drink [pretty much every other tea tastes like something I shouldn't be drinking], though I do need to add a cup[!] of sugar to a 10 oz. serving to get it to that state. [Also, I let it steep for as long as it will steep, vs. the prescribed 1-2 min, but because I don't know what I'm doing.] Sometimes it keeps me awake as per the only reason I would drink tea anyway, sometimes I'm just too groggy. I dunno, I haven't been able to figure out this relationship I have with caffeine--all I know for certain is the one time I tried a caffeinated fruit drink [cherry lemonade something, didn't even taste good], I ended up awake for thirty-six hours straight =| [oddly enough, not alert, but unable to sleep, regardless]
Oh hey, look, and another "half hour" of typing turned into three =( Time to post this already and be done for the week... 9_9
Here's an apology pic, tho [what I'm apologizing for or even if it's actually an apology is up to your tastes]:
Also, if the subj. sounds hostile, it's not meant to be. While I *do* feel I've been cutting out a lot of chaff from my life, it's also somewhat indicative of the mindset I've been in lately [which partially got me into trouble, though I knew in the back of my mind it might but went through with it anyway out of a misguided sense of "this needs to happen and it's just me kicking the baby bird out of the nest"], not to mention kinda WHAT MY JOB IS at the moment [scanning in stuff before discarding it, to make space].
Which is a lot of words to say, "Am I gonna get that raise yet?"
To wit: Falco has casually mentioned--unfortunately not in writing, but in the usual course of her "thinking out loud" sort of way that's not entirely professional but I don't really have a place to tell her how to do her job so whateber--trying to get me a raise as part of the whole "I want to incentivize you to keep you on board so I don't have to hire someone else" thing she's doing [hiring is a big thing she needs but doesn't want to do], but it hasn't gone anywhere in the month-ish since she first mentioned it... which I've finally learned is just par for the course, particularly since Schreibertooth is still technically part-timing it as our president =p ostensibly until the other branch finishes closing up, but I still have my reservations about THIS branch remaining solvent.
I would love it if it does, particularly since Falco seems to be completely on-board with me learning specifically how to do what needs to be done for the job, vs. the unpalatable "prescribed method" [spend all that time and money going back to college to MAYBE learn what skills they want on the job, with the HUGE risk of me doing so to get ANOTHER degree in something I don't really want to do for the rest of my life anyway [or, I wouldn't mind it but I suck at it, which is the case with 3D animation]]. As I said--or at least thought I was suggesting by what I said--though, I'm too burned by this point to put too much stock in any position I have lasting as long as I want [i.e. until *I* choose to move on vs. am given the boot], regardless of how well I otherwise do my job.
Anyway, the NEW news is this came up again after going nowhere that I'm aware of, because Biker has ALREADY put in her two weeks' notice. Yes, ALREADY. I'm not sure how many of you are aware of how far it is from Manassas to Germantown, but that is her commute, and they [she and Falco] knew going into this that the position was contingent on how well Biker could tolerate it--not too well, apparently. Not that I can blame her when it's, one-way, 45 minutes at BEST and TWO HOURS at peak wanting-to-die traffic =(
BUT. But. Falco has already contacted YET ANOTHER ex-employee about getting hired back, and this person apparently was totally for the proposition, PLUS she already knows the job [was there from 2003-11 before The Layoffs], so I wouldn't have to train her like I had to train Biker. So more "I don't have to go through this interviewing process again!", though I sorta wonder why it was this other person wasn't Falco's first choice.
*shrug*
As I said, though, she mentioned more work that they want to give me, to which I brought up the whole "Are you gonna pay me more for it?" angle again. Yes, she's totally for incentivizing me to stay on [and I'm kinda settled in now to where the expectation of temporariness is wearing off, not to mention it's getting to where it looks respectable on my resumé], so it's really up to Schreibertooth realizing my value at the company, which was a problem when he was never around and Falco reported to Scrooge instead, diluting the information stream.
...
Bugs me that financial security* rides on someone who is only partially aware of what's going on, at best, but nevertheless has authority over everything. Hey, kinda sounds like my favourite elements of politics -.-
*Despite things, I'm still spending slightly more than I make, particularly since I'm putting well more than the minimum on my car payments just to reduce how much I'm paying overall =p but that's some of the "I'm being subsidized" mindset I'm stuck in having the parents I have--as frugal as they were in their and my childhood, they insulated me from knowing the value of money for so long that I still have a nebulous grasp on it, unfortunately... -_- But, I also had the misfortune of having friends I like whose efforts [of various types] I like to support, so that's a constant money drain =p although I do try to keep a vague cap on how much I give out at a time, reserving it for those who need it more immediately and/or haven't gotten anything in a while. [Or, who do a good Kickstarter, since putting a deadline on something tends to draw me in more quickly than stuff that'll be around for a while.]
So that's... stuff! I haven't been doing a lot else--unfortunately, I've cut back on walking [though my father's promised to bring their old exercise bike that's otherwise gathering dust], so I'm on the "Fuck you, I can't eat all these apples" diet now as a countermeasure in the meantime. I guess it's working?, 'cause my appetite's gone down a bit--I'm not really eating constantly like I was up until a month ago. Some of that was temporarily "Stirrer Stick Diet"--itself unintentionally a diet, but basically I was/am grinding my teeth and my dentist keeps complaining about that, so I kept a stirrer stick in my mouth to dissuade myself, and that had a side effect of taking my mind off food. [It also put a lot of strain on my jaw, though, so I'm on that "diet" significantly less now.]
I also found that "Plantation Mint" tea is almost tolerable to drink [pretty much every other tea tastes like something I shouldn't be drinking], though I do need to add a cup[!] of sugar to a 10 oz. serving to get it to that state. [Also, I let it steep for as long as it will steep, vs. the prescribed 1-2 min, but because I don't know what I'm doing.] Sometimes it keeps me awake as per the only reason I would drink tea anyway, sometimes I'm just too groggy. I dunno, I haven't been able to figure out this relationship I have with caffeine--all I know for certain is the one time I tried a caffeinated fruit drink [cherry lemonade something, didn't even taste good], I ended up awake for thirty-six hours straight =| [oddly enough, not alert, but unable to sleep, regardless]
Oh hey, look, and another "half hour" of typing turned into three =( Time to post this already and be done for the week... 9_9