2381: In the Middle, In the Middle, In the Middle
RANDOM BULLSHIT POST FOR GREAT READING YOUR FRIEND LIST
I have about 31 pages, 10.3K words of Book 3 at this point, though that includes a blank page for the true last bossactual ending that I don't want to write just yet as well as a chart reminding myself of the cast list and phonetics. However, it's also 6x9" pagination with margins [as per Lulu specs] at 10pt. font, and about 1/6th the filesize of B2S1. I wouldn't be as concerned about this if I hadn't already written most of the major turning points in the book already =' though, I have to tie things together and fluff out the rushed parts, yes.
Still kind of a sign.
Char wrote a Mac vs. PC script... with some modifications:Justin Long: I'm a Mac.
John Hodgman: I'm a PC.
Christopher Walken: --and I'm Linux.
Christopher Walken: Mac... look at you! You can't upgrade... at all! You're going to be a scrawny little twerp... forever!
Christopher Walken: --and PC! ...what the shit!
Unfortunately, I can't find any good full-body shots of Christopher Walken! I mean, I guess I could sit through his Best of SNL DVD, but it's kinda not worth the time to do =/
Kinda.
I found these, though:
PC Blasting Mac:
Mac's retort:
PC's retort:
Comparing Apples & Oranges:
Though this is about all that really needs to be said:
--God! That nag is up at all fucking hours of the day! What the shit! Even *I* have a regular schedule! X( [Speaking of which, they're moving into OUR complex come end of lease... though, thankfully, not in the same unit! But what the what!¡¡¡!]
Catching up on old live chat transcripts with Carolyn Hax. This one is awesome XDAnonymous: Any advice on how to stay on track with an overly booked life right now? I'm working six days a week for a while, I'm taking a couple night classes and am trying to have a social life in-between. I feel like I wake up and every moment is dedicated to someone else and that I'm just going through the daily motions (though I need the money and want the degree).
Carolyn Hax: Give yourself small breaks, even if they're just for 15 minutes; go easy on the social life, unless isolation makes the pressure feel worse; if you start to scare yourself, don't rule out cutting back. Otherwise, do what the rest of us do. Chant "this is temporary this is temporary" and keep a chocolate bar in your desk.
Sunny Florida: Any suggestions for coping skills for an adult whose still married parents' favorite phrase is "Don't tell your mother/father..." They say this about everything -- things I tell them about me, my job, my relationship, their jobs, their HEALTH, etc.
Carolyn Hax: "You know I can't promise that, Ma"; "You know I can't promise that, Dad"; "You know I can't promise that, Ma"; "You know I can't promise that, Dad"; and keep a chocolate bar in your desk.
Portland, Ore.: I just ate the chocolate bar in my desk. Now what?!
washingtonpost.com: Same. Thanks a lot, C.
Carolyn Hax: No problem.
Eating the, Chocolate: That's why I keep several chocolate bars in my desk...
Carolyn Hax: Genius!
Washington, D.C.: Help! I gave up chocolate for Lent....
Carolyn Hax: Lemon bars, date-nut bars, peanut butter cookies, sugar cookies, shortbread, vanilla ice cream with caramel, apple pie with vanilla ice cream and caramel, pecan piiiiie (said a la Billy Crystal in "When Harry Met Sally ..."
I have never felt so evil.
Of course, there's some serious shit, too, which is just as noteworthy:Alexandria, Va.: My brother died in his sleep a little over a week ago. He was 36 and although he had lots of serious health problems, this was unexpected. Because we were so close, I'm having a hard time. I managed to come back to work today, but my ability to concentrate isn't nearly up to 100 percent and I feel totally up and down. One minute I'm laughing, remembering something funny he said, and the next minute tears start welling up because I realize that I'm going to spend every day for the rest of my life without my brother. Is this normal? Any advice? I can see that I'm making progress each day and I have lots of support from friends, family, and co-workers, and will see a therapist if I need it. I've lost other relatives, my father who I wasn't close to, and a grandfather who I was close to, but this makes me feel as close to devasted as I can get without completely falling apart.
Carolyn Hax: I am so sorry. It is devastating, and you're doing everything you can possibly do, which is, as you're discovering, not even remotely up to the task. The only thing that can fix an absence is a presence, and he's not coming back, so there's no fixing it.
But there are things that will make the pain more bearable, and they are, fortunately, built in. One is time. The other is your humanity. We are not wired to feel intense things for long periods of time. This can be comforting especially when you're in one of those scary times when you're feeling just so -much- that you think you're going to break. You won't, and the sheer volume of emotion will recede, a little and then a little more and then a little more, and you'll start to feel little spots of near-normalcy. You might already be close. You'll still get intensely emotional, but with growing spans in between.
And another thing is memory. Just as someone you love is alive for you for the days or weeks between phone calls, your brother is alive for you in your memory. You were so lucky to have had him; that's what your intense grief is telling you.
And finally you have what you learned from your brother. You have an emotional memory to carry with you as a known source of comfort, and if and when something like it comes your way again, you'll know it and appreciate it, as you appreciated him.
Even this won't feel like much. But everyone who has felt what you're feeling is rooting for you now. Hang in there.
Then it's back to chocolates:Depressing chat: Carolyn, this chat is getting too depressing. It makes me want to start kicking cute puppies and small children. Can we end on a happy note? I've eaten all of the chocolate hidden in my desk.
Carolyn Hax: Two words: vending machine. Maybe this will help, too:
Crying in Office too: I was crying today too. Broke up with my boyfriend. I don't have a door (I work in a laboratory with 8 other people). Bonus for me: everything I order comes with ice packs. They've been really helpful today. Would love to share these to with the others but then I couldn't deliver them and finish working all at the same time.
Carolyn, don't you think there should some sort of restaurant only for people who are crying and hungry (I'm starving but the ice pack hasn't finished working yet.)
Carolyn Hax: See? Funny breakup story. Don't hurt any puppies or children.
I've nearly almost finished watching the end of Yu-Gi-Oh!, but the last episode in the main "every episode of" Torrent is raw! The only other one I've seen with #224 subtitled has been at 98.4% for the last week or so X( and the monkeys with the last 1.6% never log on. Fuckers!
On that note, BED BED BED
Edit: I did draw peeps today, but nothing showable =p too much clean-up to do for what turned out.
I have about 31 pages, 10.3K words of Book 3 at this point, though that includes a blank page for the true last bossactual ending that I don't want to write just yet as well as a chart reminding myself of the cast list and phonetics. However, it's also 6x9" pagination with margins [as per Lulu specs] at 10pt. font, and about 1/6th the filesize of B2S1. I wouldn't be as concerned about this if I hadn't already written most of the major turning points in the book already =' though, I have to tie things together and fluff out the rushed parts, yes.
Still kind of a sign.
Char wrote a Mac vs. PC script... with some modifications:Justin Long: I'm a Mac.
John Hodgman: I'm a PC.
Christopher Walken: --and I'm Linux.
Christopher Walken: Mac... look at you! You can't upgrade... at all! You're going to be a scrawny little twerp... forever!
Christopher Walken: --and PC! ...what the shit!
Unfortunately, I can't find any good full-body shots of Christopher Walken! I mean, I guess I could sit through his Best of SNL DVD, but it's kinda not worth the time to do =/
Kinda.
I found these, though:
PC Blasting Mac:
Mac's retort:
PC's retort:
Comparing Apples & Oranges:
Though this is about all that really needs to be said:
--God! That nag is up at all fucking hours of the day! What the shit! Even *I* have a regular schedule! X( [Speaking of which, they're moving into OUR complex come end of lease... though, thankfully, not in the same unit! But what the what!¡¡¡!]
Catching up on old live chat transcripts with Carolyn Hax. This one is awesome XDAnonymous: Any advice on how to stay on track with an overly booked life right now? I'm working six days a week for a while, I'm taking a couple night classes and am trying to have a social life in-between. I feel like I wake up and every moment is dedicated to someone else and that I'm just going through the daily motions (though I need the money and want the degree).
Carolyn Hax: Give yourself small breaks, even if they're just for 15 minutes; go easy on the social life, unless isolation makes the pressure feel worse; if you start to scare yourself, don't rule out cutting back. Otherwise, do what the rest of us do. Chant "this is temporary this is temporary" and keep a chocolate bar in your desk.
Sunny Florida: Any suggestions for coping skills for an adult whose still married parents' favorite phrase is "Don't tell your mother/father..." They say this about everything -- things I tell them about me, my job, my relationship, their jobs, their HEALTH, etc.
Carolyn Hax: "You know I can't promise that, Ma"; "You know I can't promise that, Dad"; "You know I can't promise that, Ma"; "You know I can't promise that, Dad"; and keep a chocolate bar in your desk.
Portland, Ore.: I just ate the chocolate bar in my desk. Now what?!
washingtonpost.com: Same. Thanks a lot, C.
Carolyn Hax: No problem.
Eating the, Chocolate: That's why I keep several chocolate bars in my desk...
Carolyn Hax: Genius!
Washington, D.C.: Help! I gave up chocolate for Lent....
Carolyn Hax: Lemon bars, date-nut bars, peanut butter cookies, sugar cookies, shortbread, vanilla ice cream with caramel, apple pie with vanilla ice cream and caramel, pecan piiiiie (said a la Billy Crystal in "When Harry Met Sally ..."
I have never felt so evil.
Of course, there's some serious shit, too, which is just as noteworthy:Alexandria, Va.: My brother died in his sleep a little over a week ago. He was 36 and although he had lots of serious health problems, this was unexpected. Because we were so close, I'm having a hard time. I managed to come back to work today, but my ability to concentrate isn't nearly up to 100 percent and I feel totally up and down. One minute I'm laughing, remembering something funny he said, and the next minute tears start welling up because I realize that I'm going to spend every day for the rest of my life without my brother. Is this normal? Any advice? I can see that I'm making progress each day and I have lots of support from friends, family, and co-workers, and will see a therapist if I need it. I've lost other relatives, my father who I wasn't close to, and a grandfather who I was close to, but this makes me feel as close to devasted as I can get without completely falling apart.
Carolyn Hax: I am so sorry. It is devastating, and you're doing everything you can possibly do, which is, as you're discovering, not even remotely up to the task. The only thing that can fix an absence is a presence, and he's not coming back, so there's no fixing it.
But there are things that will make the pain more bearable, and they are, fortunately, built in. One is time. The other is your humanity. We are not wired to feel intense things for long periods of time. This can be comforting especially when you're in one of those scary times when you're feeling just so -much- that you think you're going to break. You won't, and the sheer volume of emotion will recede, a little and then a little more and then a little more, and you'll start to feel little spots of near-normalcy. You might already be close. You'll still get intensely emotional, but with growing spans in between.
And another thing is memory. Just as someone you love is alive for you for the days or weeks between phone calls, your brother is alive for you in your memory. You were so lucky to have had him; that's what your intense grief is telling you.
And finally you have what you learned from your brother. You have an emotional memory to carry with you as a known source of comfort, and if and when something like it comes your way again, you'll know it and appreciate it, as you appreciated him.
Even this won't feel like much. But everyone who has felt what you're feeling is rooting for you now. Hang in there.
Then it's back to chocolates:Depressing chat: Carolyn, this chat is getting too depressing. It makes me want to start kicking cute puppies and small children. Can we end on a happy note? I've eaten all of the chocolate hidden in my desk.
Carolyn Hax: Two words: vending machine. Maybe this will help, too:
Crying in Office too: I was crying today too. Broke up with my boyfriend. I don't have a door (I work in a laboratory with 8 other people). Bonus for me: everything I order comes with ice packs. They've been really helpful today. Would love to share these to with the others but then I couldn't deliver them and finish working all at the same time.
Carolyn, don't you think there should some sort of restaurant only for people who are crying and hungry (I'm starving but the ice pack hasn't finished working yet.)
Carolyn Hax: See? Funny breakup story. Don't hurt any puppies or children.
I've nearly almost finished watching the end of Yu-Gi-Oh!, but the last episode in the main "every episode of" Torrent is raw! The only other one I've seen with #224 subtitled has been at 98.4% for the last week or so X( and the monkeys with the last 1.6% never log on. Fuckers!
On that note, BED BED BED
Edit: I did draw peeps today, but nothing showable =p too much clean-up to do for what turned out.