Thinky thoughts about fear of creative endeavors
So, this week I am apparently wrestling with fear about creative endeavors (which probably matter to no one but me).
1. I have been freaking out that I can't do paperlegends . I haven't even started properly to give myself a chance to fail. My logical brain is urging my reptile to shut the hell up and just write something. Give it a try. Don't stop before you've even started.
2. Interestingly, I am also freaking out about trying something new with quilting. I just had a realization that if I hate what I put on a little quilt, I can just take the stitches out and put something else on it. I am going to attempt to couch yarn on a quilt, something I've never done before. I had been thinking I would make it into something resembling a neuron, but then I thought, that's too hard, I think I'll make a jellyfish instead.
So, why is my brain being so squirrely? Where does this fear come from? It is definitely *not* the first time I've had this kind of fear. What purpose does this fear serve? Any?
I'm trying to sit back and be more of an observer of the fear and say to myself, "these are things you are excited about, just trust that the passion is there and if some piece of it doesn't work, it will be ok". Some of you know that when I was going to a therapist, at one point she said to me, "You may not be a perfectionist, but your standards are so high as to make that moot." I could have died when she told me that.
Creative things do not have to be perfect. In fact, imperfect creations are often very beautiful. It is the imperfections which make people beautiful.
Also, go check out this awesome femmeslash queen/knight graphic that someone posted on Tumblr. I don't think it's fandom specific, but it's purely awesome.
This entry was originally posted at http://jelazakazone.dreamwidth.org/678030.html. Feel free to comment here or there.
1. I have been freaking out that I can't do paperlegends . I haven't even started properly to give myself a chance to fail. My logical brain is urging my reptile to shut the hell up and just write something. Give it a try. Don't stop before you've even started.
2. Interestingly, I am also freaking out about trying something new with quilting. I just had a realization that if I hate what I put on a little quilt, I can just take the stitches out and put something else on it. I am going to attempt to couch yarn on a quilt, something I've never done before. I had been thinking I would make it into something resembling a neuron, but then I thought, that's too hard, I think I'll make a jellyfish instead.
So, why is my brain being so squirrely? Where does this fear come from? It is definitely *not* the first time I've had this kind of fear. What purpose does this fear serve? Any?
I'm trying to sit back and be more of an observer of the fear and say to myself, "these are things you are excited about, just trust that the passion is there and if some piece of it doesn't work, it will be ok". Some of you know that when I was going to a therapist, at one point she said to me, "You may not be a perfectionist, but your standards are so high as to make that moot." I could have died when she told me that.
Creative things do not have to be perfect. In fact, imperfect creations are often very beautiful. It is the imperfections which make people beautiful.
Also, go check out this awesome femmeslash queen/knight graphic that someone posted on Tumblr. I don't think it's fandom specific, but it's purely awesome.
This entry was originally posted at http://jelazakazone.dreamwidth.org/678030.html. Feel free to comment here or there.