Prayer
I haven't prayed in so long, I fear I have forgotten how.
My prayers used to be so selfish. Of course, I always prayed for my family, that they all continued to be healthy, and give thanks for all I have, and then please please please can you make (insert 4th grade crush name here) like me back?! I'd be so happy, I wouldn't ask for anything more. Of course, usually the kid hated my guts, so I continued to pray for it. Every now and then some of the news of the world would burst through my happy child bubble, and I'd cry myself to bed praying that my daddy doesn't get drafted for the war (1st Iraq war, back in the day.)
Today i've been listening to the news, and reading blogs from Lebanon and I think.... how can anyone dare ask for anything selfish in prayer?
I haven't prayed in a long, long time. I haven't even prayed since Julio died... though I've thought I wanted to, but I feel silly. I want to go to church and light a candle for Julio, and light another one for all the innocent victims of war. There better be a God and a Heaven, otherwise it's just not fair.
My prayers used to be so selfish. Of course, I always prayed for my family, that they all continued to be healthy, and give thanks for all I have, and then please please please can you make (insert 4th grade crush name here) like me back?! I'd be so happy, I wouldn't ask for anything more. Of course, usually the kid hated my guts, so I continued to pray for it. Every now and then some of the news of the world would burst through my happy child bubble, and I'd cry myself to bed praying that my daddy doesn't get drafted for the war (1st Iraq war, back in the day.)
Today i've been listening to the news, and reading blogs from Lebanon and I think.... how can anyone dare ask for anything selfish in prayer?
I haven't prayed in a long, long time. I haven't even prayed since Julio died... though I've thought I wanted to, but I feel silly. I want to go to church and light a candle for Julio, and light another one for all the innocent victims of war. There better be a God and a Heaven, otherwise it's just not fair.