Gift fic for moonbyrd
To: moonbyrd
From: yuumei_nata
SEASON'S GREETINGS!
Title: Fools Fall in Love
Pairing/Group: Sho/Shige; mentions of Koyama/Ohno
Rating:NC-17
Warnings: Other than gay!sex and fail!Shige, none.
Notes: To moonbyrd: I was so glad when I saw I had gotten you as my recipient, and I couldn’t resist the chance to write ShoShige. I hope it turned out not too weird, and that you will like it, because I had fun writing it ♥
To my beta(s)/supporters: Couldn’t have done this without you ♥
Summary: Had anyone been asked to describe Kato Shigeaki in one word, it would always be smart, and that, in his opinion, was the best thing he’d achieved all his life. Unfortunately for him, the universe didn’t quite agree, sending one Sakurai Sho to mess with his head and turn his world upside down.
Kato Shigeaki was the kind of man who had always made smart choices.
Ever since the age of five when he had first realized what the word meant, to do the thing that would benefit him the most without breaking any rules, official or invisible ones. Of course, it hadn’t always been easy; he had lost count of the times he had been pushed into a puddle with the words ‘teacher’s pet’ ringing in his ears or been called out last during P.E. because he spent more time studying to earn that extra gold star and less running around with the other kids.
It had started to pay off in high school, where being smart secured him a group of similar-minded friends, a position in the student body, and a short fling with a girl who was both cute and impressed by him being chosen to give the graduation speech. He maybe hadn’t been competing for the title of most popular, but in his eyes he’d survived his teenage years well.
University, on the other hand, had been the best time of his life. His first year as a law student had been filled with new people who regarded being smart as one of the most desired qualities. He had also perfected himself, every decision he made a smart one thanks to careful deliberation and sometimes just pure luck. He had a pretty girlfriend, a nice group of friends, and even his decision to switch to photography after his first year had turned out to be a good idea.
After graduating with not the best, but a good degree he had worked freelance for some months, another smart choice on his behalf since that earned him a job at a large newspaper. It wasn’t anything big, just going around Tokyo taking pictures for local news for their website, but it was a good stepping stone considering his future career.
He liked his job a lot; the people he worked with were fun, the whole experience was a whole new chapter in his life and he welcomed it with a smile. He continued making smart decisions even at the workplace, choosing the right people to associate with, taking on extra work when it was needed, all those small things that in the end could result in a promotion.
Only then, on his 23rd birthday, it seemed his luck and capacity to think had run away together to some faraway island in the Pacific Ocean with no return ticket.
It was then that Kato Shigeaki made the first stupid choice in his life.
He fell for Sakurai Sho.
Sakurai Sho, who happened to be one of the most popular journalists at the newspaper, not just because he was immensely talented, but also because he was genuinely nice to everyone and very, very handsome. Technically, he was also Shige’s superior, not to mention undoubtedly male.
He hadn’t quite realized what it was at first, the weird feeling in his chest whenever he saw the man, or even more pathetically, whenever his name was mentioned, but soon enough it became pretty obvious. He had it bad too. It wasn’t the kind of pleasant, thrilling type of love; it was the kind that made him act like a complete idiot, and the worst part was that he couldn’t shake it off or escape it because Sho even had his own corner at the local television news.
Telling his best friend about it didn’t help either. Koyama was too busy fawning over some new guy he’d met at his art class. And in any case, Koyama would only encourage him to act on his feelings, telling Shige he had always played it too safe, that he didn’t even know what love was.
Shige didn’t agree. Quite the opposite, actually; he saw Koyama’s view on it nothing but irresponsible escapism. He’d have one infatuation after another, one day crying over a broken heart and the next declaring someone he'd met two minutes ago his soulmate.
With some help from books called “Know Yourself - Know Your Heart” or “Ten Steps to Getting Over Him” or even “D-I-Y: Loose Screws” (well, that one had turned out to be about actual screws, not the mental ones) and listening to a recording that told him to get over the man for fourteen nights in a row, he gave up.
He was utterly and hopelessly in love, and there was nothing he could do about it.
***
After a few months, things hadn’t changed, for better or for worse. The world was still going around, Koyama was still dating the same guy (Shige was pretty sure he’d made it to top five already), Sho was still as popular and unreachable as ever and Shige? Shige was still in love.
It wasn’t until people started asking him if he was quite alright and pamphlets about burnout or digestive disorders started magically appearing on his desk that he realized he needed to do something about the situation.
He didn’t trust his own judgment anymore. After all he hadn’t been able to do anything right lately, so he turned to the only person he could. Only when Shige for once was actually willing to take Koyama's advice, he caught his best friend on a train to Hokkaido, apparently on his way to a fishing trip with his art teacher of a boyfriend.
It said something about Shige’s distress that instead of lecturing Koyama about the dangers of spontaneity, he just pleaded with him to think of something. Koyama’s advice, unsurprisingly, was that Shige should find a new guy to get over the old one. What was surprising was that Shige actually thought it good advice.
So the next week, he called a friend from his law school times, inviting her out and thinking his luck has finally changed when she immediately told him yes.
Unfortunately, that wasn’t the case.
The date started out well enough, the restaurant nice, the girl pretty and Shige in a good mood. An hour in, the wine loosening them both up, her smile was bright when she leaned over the table with “Enough about me. Tell me what’s it like to be a photographer,” and Shige knew he’d be taking her home that night.
He started with his usual speech about both capturing the beauty in things and seeing them from a different perspective, drawing her attention to him until it felt like they were the only people in the room. Only then, he somehow got on the topic of the company and his coworkers.
Thirty minutes later, her smile had started to be a little strained as Shige frantically tried to stop himself from speaking about Sho. Despite everything, she had miraculously agreed to continue the night in a small izakaya that wasn’t really nearby, just that Shige had heard the atmosphere was nice.
Despite his promise of not talking about work anymore, Shige found it impossible to not somehow connect their every topic to the man constantly on his mind. He could see her flinching when he launched into another story of Sakurai-senpai, but it was like he physically couldn’t stop.
The moment she got up, politely excusing herself to the bathroom, he knew she wouldn’t be coming back. Hell, even he wished he could escape his company. He sighed, resining himself to his fate and moving up to sit at the bar, figuring he might as well get drunk.
The bartender gave him one evaluating look, pouring him a double shot without even asking and placing it in front of him.
“On the house,” he said, his expression neutral.
“But… Thanks,” Shige said, accepting the drink after the black-haired man gave him a stern glare and downing it in one go.
“Girlfriend?” the man asked after a moment of silence, and Shige couldn’t even find it in himself to be bothered.
“Just a date.” He shrugged, and the worst part was that he didn’t really even care. He hadn’t been interested her in the first place, hadn’t even been able to fake his interest, a thing that usually came to him as naturally as his infamously fake smiles. What did bother him was how everything seemed to go badly ever since Sakurai Sho had entered his life.
“This isn’t the place to bring a girl on a first date,” the bartender said, and Shige thought it really wasn’t his business what he did with his life.
“Right, this is a place to drink, so a beer, please,” he said a little gruffily, jumping a little when the guy slammed a pint in front of him, splattering some on the counter.
“I’m the one who calls the shots here, kid. My place, my rules; don’t like it, then leave,” he said, his tone not really angry but still making Shige squirm a little.
“Sorry,” he mumbled, hiding his embarrassment behind the glass as he took a long sip.
“The name’s Yoko by the way,” the bartender said after a moment of silence, flashing him a crooked smile when he looked up.
“Oh, uh, Shige,” he replied, using the same informal style the bartender, Yoko, had used.
“I haven’t seen you here before,” Yoko commented, and Shige bit back a sharp answer; it wasn’t Yoko’s fault he was having a bad day, or more like month.
“I haven’t been here before,” he replied, not really surprised by the question when he stopped to think about it. The izakaya seemed like a place favoured by regulars from the neighbourhood. He wondered briefly if Sho lived close by and if Yoko knew him, but then he quickly pushed those thoughts to the back of his mind.
“Are you from around here?” Yoko continued, and Shige sighed, looking longingly at the secluded table he had occupied before. It was obvious Yoko wouldn’t let him wallow in his misery alone. He figured he’d be grateful in the morning since he was usually of the opinion that self-pity was for losers. Too bad he pretty much felt like one recently.
“No, a, um, someone recommended this place,” Shige said, aiming for casual vagueness.
“They recommended this place for a date? Are you sure they don’t want the girl for themselves?” Yoko grinned, filling Shige’s glass after it had emptied. He actually started feeling relaxed enough to smile a little at Yoko’s comment, even if most of it was thanks to the alcohol soothing his nerves.
“No, we were in the neighbourhood, so…” Shige trailed off. He knew very well it had been a bad idea from the very start.
“Neighbourhood, huh?” Yoko said, giving him a look that made him squirm again. Yoko couldn’t possibly know what he was thinking, Shige concluded.
“Yeah. I wasn’t that into her anyway,” Shige said, realizing it sounded like a bad excuse and cringing a little.
“That’s what they all say,” Yoko said, without a hint of humour on his face. Shige was having trouble deciding if he liked the man or not, but at least he was better company than the bottom of his glass.
Despite serving the few other customers occasionally, Yoko mostly spent the next hour chatting with Shige, telling him random stories of the customers of the izakaya. Shige also learned he was originally from Osaka, a fact that made him almost tear up, since he too had spent his childhood in that area. It was at that point that Yoko replaced his beer with coffee, ignoring Shige’s whining.
It was still surprisingly early, the place actually filling up with people instead of emptying. And seeing as how Shige’s luck had turned against him, it was only natural that one of those people should be none other than the man he both hoped and dreaded to meet.
Shige didn’t notice Sho entering the bar until he was standing next to him, ordering ‘the usual’ from Yoko, who had greeted him in a way that seemed almost friendly.
“Kato-kun, is that you?” Sho asked after Shige’s failed attempt at hiding his face by studying one of the snack menus closely.
“Oh, Sakurai-san, didn’t see you there!” Shige greeted him, aiming for a casual tone that hopefully didn’t give away how drunk he was. Judging by the look Yoko gave him, he had not achieved that, as was expected.
“I didn’t know you lived around here,” Sho continued with a polite smile. When Sho took the stool next to him, Shige suppressed the urge to slam his head against the counter.
“Uhm, I don’t really. I just happened to be in the neighbourhood,” Shige mumbled, hoping Sho was here with friends, or at least would leave Shige alone after the mandatory small talk.
Sho nodded, still smiling like he did on the news, making Shige’s cheeks feel a little hot.
“Oi, Aiba, you were supposed to be here an hour ago!” Yoko’s loud voice cut through Shige’s wishes of the ground swallowing him or aliens kidnapping him or anything really to get out of the situation.
He turned his head just in time to see a tall, lanky man step behind the bar, wrapping his arms around Yoko’s waist and squeezing him with a huge smile that reminded him of Koyama.
“Missed me, Yokocho?” the tall man, apparently going by the name of Aiba, teased, moving to the other side of the bar before Yoko could even react. Shige was slightly amused, the two seeming like an unlikely duo to ever become friends, much less start a business together.
“Don’t let their appearances fool you. Under it, they’re just two huge perverts,” Sho noted, apparently noticing the slightly curious look on Shige’s face.
“Oh,” Shige blinked, feeling a little weird thinking of Sho, who despite being nice seemed always so proper, having perverted friends.
“Don’t let Yoko fool you. He’s not half as cool as he pretends to be,” Sho continued, laughing a little at Shige’s disbelieving expression.
“How’s the gossip, ladies?” Yoko’s dry voice interrupted. Shige was slightly embarrassed, but Sho was barely affected, calmly asking for another beer.
“Are you the poor guy who got dumped?” a new voice joined the conversation, Aiba’s sympathetic eyes trained on Shige.
“Kato-kun, you got dumped? I’m sorry to hear that,” Sho said, using the same voice Shige recognized from the more serious pieces of news he covered, earthquakes and recession and such. Shige groaned, burying his head in his arms; the night just kept getting worse.
“He’s probably just pissed he didn’t get laid today,” Yoko joined in again, making Shige’s head rise, aiming a glare at the older man who just stared back until Shige turned his eyes away. Yoko was seriously unnerving.
“I know how tough it can be, Kato-kun, but you know what they say, there’s plenty of fish in the sea!” Sho said in an obvious attempt at being a good senpai, adding an awkward pat on Shige’s back that made Aiba chuckle, a glint in his eyes when he looked at Sho that Shige couldn’t quite place, before he hurried to serve yet another customer.
“It’s not like any woman would ever turn you down,” he said, a bitter tint to his voice. He knew it was a mistake the moment the words left his mouth, a quick apology on the tip of his tongue.
But instead of a scolding glare, he was faced with a spluttering Sho, coughing like he had almost choked on his beer. Yoko, on the other hand was grinning like Shige had told the best joke of the evening, reaching over the counter to slap Sho on the back.
“Yeah, Sho, it’s not like any woman would turn you down,” he said, practically leering at the man. Shige didn’t really get the joke, staring at the two of them like they had suddenly lost their minds, surprised that even Sakurai Sho, of all people, could look so…uncool.
With Sho shooting an embarrassed glare at Yoko, who just smiled even wider, Shige started feeling growingly uncomfortable, excusing himself to the bathroom. Yoko reminded him mockingly that he could see if Shige tried to sneak out, making Shige stumble with his words when he assured him he wouldn’t.
He took his time, trying to calm himself down, trying to find the old, smart Shige from where he was buried inside him. Only when he came back, the mood had changed again, Sho looking absolutely murderous when Yoko welcomed him back and told him he had business to attend to so he’d leave the two of them alone.
It was the sparkle in Yoko’s eyes that made Shige uneasy, and the growing feeling that Sho and Yoko had been talking about him. Shige and Sho continued alone, Shige trying to avoid looking at Sho while looking like he wasn’t doing exactly that. They had difficulty forming a decent conversation, something that just convinced Shige more of the fact that they definitely weren’t meant to be.
He was relieved when Sho left on the pretense of having to work early the following morning, waiting a good ten minutes before going himself to avoid the awkwardness of having to walk together.
When he was finally at home, flopping on the couch and burying his face in the pillows as if to hide his embarrassment from the world, he decided it was time to start avoiding Sho as well as he could.
***
After somewhat successfully managing to avoid his senpai for nearly two weeks, as Shige was starting to believe his situation actually was fixable (even if the man still frequented his dreams), the worst thing possible happened.
His department head had come down to tell him he’d be assisting a reporter on a new special article series. Shige had been thrilled at first because normally he took every opportunity he could to prove his skills, hoping to do much more than just take pictures of little old ladies shopping for food or hooligans hanging out at stations.
However, normally, he didn’t have feelings for the reporter who would be joining him. If working with Sho wasn't bad enough, the job also included taking a road trip through Japan. The title of the series of articles would simply be “Life in Japan”, which meant going to cities and villages all over to cover all kinds of people and stories.
Unfortunately, he was in no position to say no to such an opportunity, especially when rumour had it Sho had especially requested Shige. He had no clue why that was, but somewhere under the frustration and anxiety, he felt his heart make a tiny little flip of happiness.
So come next week he was in a car with Sho, trying to come up with topics to discuss. It was early morning, the roads still silent, but his mind was wide awake, on alert, trying his best to appear perfectly normal, like his palms hadn’t been clammy from the moment he had stepped into Sho’s car.
It took them the first day to really get comfortable in each other’s company, but as soon as they started actually working, Shige taking pictures as Sho interviewed the people, their interaction became a lot smoother.
What surprised him most was the fact that Sho seemed to enjoy his company, seeking him out in the hotels or ryokans they spent their nights in, sometimes staying up quite late, just talking.
The week flew by, Shige determined not to think about how after this it would be impossible to pretend he was fine just being coworkers with Sho. He would have plenty of time for that later, now he just wanted to enjoy the rare chance of getting the man all to himself, to converse with him without having to feel so self-conscious about it.
It was their last night when things took a bad turn. Thus far, they had had their own rooms, but thanks to a mix up at the hotel there was just one room reserved for them, the place otherwise fully booked. It was late, the small city strange to them both, so at Sho’s suggestion they decided to share.
Only,Shige hadn’t taken into account that it would be a double bed, the kind you couldn’t divide into two separate ones. He froze when he saw it, his grip on the handle of his suitcase too tight, trying his hardest not to panic.
Sho tried to laugh about it, but it was evident he was feeling a little awkward too when he announced it was big enough to fit four people comfortably so they shouldn’t have any problem. Shige nodded, not wanting to make Sho suspicious even when his mind was screaming at him that it was the worst idea of his life, topping even that time he had been dared into calling a sexline in the middle of a lecture (he still had difficulties looking at a pointer).
Sho claimed the shower first. Shige was glad to get a moment to collect himself, to school his mind into not wandering where it definitely shouldn’t. He paced around the room, avoiding looking at the bed or thinking about Sho in the shower because that did bad things to his body.
When he heard the shower turned off, he panicked a little, needing to seem relaxed and definitely not like he had just been fretting about the night for the entire time Sho had been in the next room. He eventually decided on sitting on the edge of the bed, reaching for the remote to quickly turn the TV on.
He had always been bad with hotel televisions, fumbling with the remote, trying to find any of the regular channels. In the end, he just stabbed at random buttons, his eyes widening in shock when he accidentally managed to choose one of the pay channels, the wide screen attached to the wall suddenly filled with naked bodies, obscene moans and grunts filling the silence.
As his luck had it, Sho chose that exact moment to enter the room. Shige’s body refused to take the panicked orders from his brain, the porn continuing to play on the screen.
“Oh,” said Sho, his eyes darting between Shige and the screen, the younger man finally snapping out of his stupor and turning off the television set. He swallowed thickly, trying to decide if it was more embarrassing looking at Sho or pointedly not looking at him.
“Don’t mind me,” Sho said, smiling at Shige, without the slightest hint of sarcasm in his voice, making Shige’s face heat up quickly. That was also when his brain registered the fact that the man he was ridiculously attracted to was standing in nothing but a towel wrapped around his waist.
Shige couldn’t stop his eyes from following the droplets of water sliding down his naked chest, past a dark nipple onto his abs and then even lower. His mouth was suddenly very dry, blood rushing in his ears, which was a little funny considering how it seemed to be pooling a lot lower, his pants getting too tight for comfort.
“Oh, I wasn’t-I didn’t, I accidentally…” he said, stumbling with his words, at the same time trying to will the erection away. His mortification doubled when he saw Sho’s eyes drifting lower, raising his eyebrows a little.
“Sure,” he said, his tone suggesting he didn’t believe Shige in the slightest and was just being polite. Shige got up quickly, muttering something about needing to shower, that Sho didn’t need to wait up, before escaping into the bathroom.
His only comfort was that at least Sho had thought it had been the straight porn that had caused Shige’s state, not his lust for the man himself.
He stripped slowly, stepping under the cold spray of water and standing there long enough for his erection to wilt away. There was no way he could touch himself while Sho was so close, when he was about to sleep in the same bed as him.
He was relieved to find Sho already tucked in and apparently asleep when he finally exited the bathroom, quickly making his way to the bed and slipping under the covers. He made sure to position himself to the very edge of the bed, resisting the temptation to build a wall out of pillows, a technique he and Koyama had used on a trip of theirs that hadn’t in the end worked all that well.
Apparently he fell asleep pretty easily despite everything, because the next thing he knew, he was roused from sleep by something. The first thing his sleepy brain realized was that he was hard; the second that there was a warm body pressed against his back.
He turned around, snuggling closer to the warmth, ready to continue his sleep when his brain finally caught up. He stiffened, the realization that he was now pressed against Sho slowly sinking in.
But somehow, instead of moving quickly away he just shifted a little, his breath catching in his throat when he realized there was now something hard pressing against his thigh.
He opened his eyes slowly, blinking, trying to focus his eyes in the dark room, maybe to see if Sho was awake too, but he couldn’t tell. He licked his lips, his breathing suddenly very shallow but again, instead of pulling back like he should’ve, he moved his leg closer to Sho.
He could hear the change in Sho’s breathing, though he still wasn’t sure if he was awake or not. The way Sho’s hips seemed to move a little, the hardness rubbing against Shige’s thigh like a silent plea, made him even more forward.
His hand seemed to find its way between their bodies almost of its own accord, using his palm to rub at the unmistakable bulge in Sho’s pajama pants, feeling the radiating heat through the thin fabric. His own cock twitched when he heard Sho’s breath hitching, and this time he couldn’t mistake the way Sho’s hips snapped forward into the touch.
The next thing he felt Sho’s arm circling his waist, pulling him closer, and it was like the rational part of his brain was still asleep. Shige’s lips landed too close to Sho’s neck to not reach out and taste. He kept moving his hand slowly, but it was harder to not touch himself instead, the smell and feel of Sho intoxicating.
When he felt Sho’s hand moving lower, cupping his ass gently, his last restraint melted away. He used both his hands to tug both their pants lower, freeing their erections.
There was no room for right or wrong when he finally wrapped his hand around Sho’s erection, feeling the weight of it for a moment before slowly moving his hand up and down. The moan Sho let out made his blood boil, his own following suit when he felt a hand wrapping around his cock.
It was better than anything he had imagined, gasping for breath, his face still pressed into Sho’s neck, not caring that the position was awkward for both of them. The small noises Sho made send shivers down his spine, his body hyperaware of every touch both on his skin and on his ass, Sho’s fingers kneading the flesh while pumping him steadily.
The heat between them built up dizzyingly fast. Sho was the one to lose it first, his seed spilling onto Shige’s fingers with a low groan. The way his hands stilled, squeezing Shige’s shaft almost painfully hard was what drove him over the edge, his body tensing before he too released, feeling dizzy with the intensity of it.
Sho didn’t pull away, but neither of them said anything either, Shige listening to the other man’s breathing slowing down gradually, lulling them both to sleep.
It couldn’t have been more than a few hours before Shige woke up again, the reality of what he had done crashing down on him before he even could open his eyes.
He didn’t really have time to think about what he was doing before he had rolled away from Sho, luckily still sound asleep, scribbling a note that he had left for a jog before escaping the room.
He spent the morning just walking around, the cold feeling of dread tight around his chest, unable to grasp how badly he had messed up. If doing that without asking wasn’t bad enough, he had actually taken advantage of Sho when he had been half asleep.
He couldn’t remember a time he had felt so utterly lost and disgusted with himself, the feeling not going away even when Sho seemed to have no recollection of the night when he finally got back. He wasn’t sure if Sho was just being nice about it or if he really had been asleep, but nevertheless, they were back to square one, Shige acting even more stiff than he had in the beginning.
It was a huge relief when the day ended, and they parted with slightly forced smiles, Shige firmly deciding he’d avoid Sho to the best of his abilities, restricting himself to professional behavior only.
He tried contacting Koyama again, hoping he would be able to accidentally say something that would make Shige want to never speak to Sho again, that had been the case when Shige had almost started crushing on his high school teacher.
It didn’t help, Koyama just laughing at him, telling him it would all work out if Shige would just let it be in an infuriatingly calm, un-Koyama-like, voice. Shige started suspecting that fisherman Koyama was still living with, on some small island, was actually some cult leader.
***
It was the night of the office Christmas party, a bunch of them crowding into the same small izakaya Shige’s date failure had taken place in. Shige still wasn’t quite sure how he’d ended up in the same company as Sho, but in the end he didn’t really mind either.
He hadn’t really seen or talked to Sho after their trip, their contact limited to an email where Sho complimented Shige on a job well done, and he was pretty confident he could pull off the professional act, after all.
Things seemed to be going smoothly, Shige pleasantly buzzed but making sure he was still sober enough to keep in control of himself.
Shige was sure Sho didn’t remember or suspect anything after a few coworkers asked them about their trip, Sho’s answers natural, meeting Shige’s eyes briefly and so he could actually relax and enjoy the small afterparty, laughing at the jokes and even telling a few of his own. It was like he had finally gotten his old self back, only slightly less in control and a little more relaxed.
An hour and several jugs of beer carried to the tables their crowd occupied later, things took a strange turn. Sho had somehow ended up sitting across the table from Shige, their gazes meeting over the table more often than not.
The first one or five times, Shige quickly looked away, desperately trying to avoid turning his head Sho’s way. Of course, that proved a little difficult because for the past 6 months, Shige’s gaze had naturally gravitated towards that person, something he still hadn’t learned to control.
But then, as people left and more private conversations started forming, Shige found himself just sitting there quietly, not really interested in either of the conversations going on around him. When he looked around, he was surprised to notice Sho wasn’t really participating either.
The smile they exchanged was slightly awkward, Shige quickly pretending to be following the conversation his coworker and their boss were having about the latest baseball game, a sport Shige had little interest in.
After a moment or two, he found himself sneaking looks at Sho again, starting an awkward conversation when the man caught him looking one too many times. After a few failed attempts at finding a good topic, they ended up talking about their trip.
Shige was starting to feel a little weird, thinking he was missing something when the conversation continued, Sho holding a pause that felt like it should’ve been meaningful, his eyes lingering on Shige longer than he thought comfortable.
It was like Sho was flirting with him, a thought that scattered Shige’s brain enough to almost choke on his beer when he felt Sho’s knee brushing against his under the table.
Sho seemed a little awkward when he apologized, excusing himself for a smoke a few moments after, looking at Shige like he was trying to convey a message.
Old Shige would never have left after Sho, but he wasn’t old Shige anymore, where he had lost his smartness he had apparently gotten something else in return. He rose from the table and followed the other man, his throat drying with nervousness. He had no idea what he was doing, no idea what was going to happen when they got outside, but somehow that was fine.
Sometime in the past months he had learned how to live his life without planning every moment.
They exited through a side door Shige hadn’t known was there, finding themselves at a small and empty back alley. Shige couldn’t help but noticing the way the dim lighting of the alley was flattering on Sho’s figure, making him seem less like a newscaster with a perfect smile, and more like the man whose body Shige had felt close to him just a few short weeks ago.
“To tell you the truth, I don’t really smoke,” Sho admitted a little sheepishly, ruffling his hair a little when he met Shige’s eyes.
“Me neither,” Shige admitted, the rational part of his brain telling him to smile back because the tone of his voice was too low, like he was suggesting something Sho surely hadn’t meant. But he couldn’t shake the feeling it wasn’t just that he was lovesick enough to be delusional, the way Sho was looking at him, like he was waiting for Shige to call the shots.
So for the first time in his life, he actually knowingly acted against his better judgment, stepping a little closer and nervously bringing his lips to Sho’s. He was surprised to realize he was actually some centimeters taller than the older man, figuring his confident aura had made him seem taller than he was in Shige’s head.
He winced with embarrassment when their noses bumped together, Shige’s lips landing awkwardly on the corner of Sho’s mouth. He was ready to step away, a stuttered apology already forming on his lips when he felt Sho responding, moving his head so that their lips fit perfectly together.
The kiss was short and hesitant, like neither of them really trusted that the other wouldn’t pull back at any moment. Shige blinked when the kiss broke, his tongue flicking out in a nervous habit, their faces still close together, meeting Sho’s eyes and feeling his breath on his moist lips.
This time it was Sho who initiated the kiss, his hand suddenly behind Shige’s neck, pressing their mouths back together. It was much more daring, all doubt leaving his head when he felt Sho’s tongue sweeping over his lower lip in a silent plea for more.
He closed his eyes, letting his hands find Sho’s hips when the kiss grew more daring, more passionate, abandoning reason to get more of the burning feeling. He was gasping into Sho’s mouth before he knew it. Sho’s body was pinning him to the cold and dirty wall behind him, but he couldn’t even pretend to care.
He would’ve expected to be in full panic mode, but that was the furthest thing from his mind as he lost himself in the kiss, the two of them breaking apart only to crash their mouths together again and again, losing track of time and place.
Sho’s hands were in his hair and his in the man’s back pockets, their hips grinding together in small motions, muffled groans forming in the back of his throat, and he couldn’t believe this was happening, too perfect to be true.
Later he wondered if they would’ve just ended up doing each other there in that small alley, a thought that disgusted him much less than it should’ve, if a low whistle hadn’t interrupted them, Yoko’s voice calling for Aiba to come see what he had found.
They had broken apart quickly, a similar look of a deer in the headlights reflected on both their faces as their eyes met with Aiba’s glittering smile and Yoko’s dark grin. It would’ve been obvious to anyone what had just happened, Shige’s hair tousled and Sho’s lips bruised, even if they hadn’t been caught red handed.
Shige was glad his blood was humming in his ears too loudly to hear what Aiba had said, the redness rising in Sho’s cheeks hint enough.
“Sorry for the interruption. We’ll leave you boys to it,” Yoko smirked, pushing Aiba back inside before he could traumatize their favourite customer anymore, only to pop his head back out again, this time aiming his words just at Sho.
“Don’t screw up this one, Sho-chan.”
When Shige got over his initial shock, finally finding the courage to look over at Sho only to find the man staring at his own shoes, his hands in tight fists, he couldn’t help the cold disappointment spreading in his chest. He should’ve known it was too good to be true, and it was obvious Sho was already regretting it. His only consolation was that at least this time Sho hadn’t been asleep.
He was ready to disappear, plans of quitting the company as soon as Monday forming in his mind when he opened his mouth, only to be interrupted by Sho.
“You have no idea how long I’ve wanted that,” Sho said, the look in his eyes when he raised his head to meet Shige’s stare both guarded and hopeful. Shige just blinked, his brain refusing to process the new information, because Sho couldn’t possibly mean what he thought he did.
“What?” he croaked, falling back against the wall because he wasn’t quite sure his legs would hold him up anymore.
Sho just shook his head, stepping closer and kissing Shige again, and he could feel the hint of desperation behind his determination. For once of his life, Shige’s body seemed to know what to do, responding to the kiss almost naturally, his fists curling into the crisp material of Sho’s shirt to pull him close again.
“Shige,” Sho breathed against his lips, and that simple word seemed to ignite something in him again, his hand sliding to Sho’s pant pocket to fish out his phone, dialing the number for the taxi he didn’t even know he remembered.
He only pulled back long enough to tell the address to the woman on the other end of the line, not even caring when his breath hitched quite obviously when Sho’s tongue found a sweet spot under his ear.
“Come home with me,” he asked, his hands in Sho’s hair when the man nibbled on his neck, his knee pressed between Shige’s thighs, and he even forgot to be relieved when Sho answered yes.
He had never done this kind of thing before, his only attempt at a reckless one night stand ending when both his and her dorm rooms had been occupied by their respective roommates.
Oddly enough, however, he didn’t hesitate even the smallest bit, not when they entered the taxi, Shige mumbling his address to the driver while Sho did his best at distracting him, and not when Sho pressed him against the elevator doors, both almost falling out when it stopped at Shige’s floor.
There was a nervous excitement bubbling in his chest when he fiddled with the key, Sho thankfully standing back or he would’ve probably never managed to unlock the door.
They stumbled into Shige’s apartment, not really caring where their shoes landed when they kicked them off, Shige finding himself pressed against a wall before they even made it out of the genkan. His mind was running a million miles a minute, the way Sho’s hips moved against him making his pants feel uncomfortably tight, loud moans threatening to rip from his throat any moment.
However, it seemed like luck wasn’t on his side that night either, Shige almost falling on his ass with surprise when he heard a cheery voice calling out his name.
“Shige, I hope you don’t mind I-oh, you’ve got company,” that voice was saying, and Shige cursed all the gods he could think of for making him think giving Koyama a key was a good idea. Sure, he wasn’t in the habit of bringing home random people he had hooked up with-actually, he rarely even brought home people from a date-but he should’ve known something like this was bound to happen.
“You weren’t supposed to be back yet,” Shige muttered to no one in particular, wondering what he had done in his previous life to deserve this now.
He lifted his head to meet Koyama’s curious eyes. Sho had taken a few steps back, looking at Koyama and then back at Shige. He could almost see the wheels turning in his head, and he rushed to explain.
“Uh, Sh-Sakurai-san, this is my friend, Koyama Keiichiro,” Shige said, hoping that the semi-formal introduction would make the situation a little less awkward. Sho looked at him silently, slight apprehension in his eyes that was gone before he could even be sure.
“It’s not what you thi-,” Shige started, but Sho interrupted him before he could finish.
“I should probably go, let you catch up with your friend,” Sho said, straightening his tie with a small frown, nodding politely at Koyama but not meeting Shige’s eyes. It was too much for Shige’s brain to keep up with, opening his mouth and hoping the right words would just fall out, but with no luck.
“Sho-kun, is that you?” a second voice, one Shige didn’t recognize, asked. All three of them turned their heads to the direction of the doorway leading to Shige’s living room, their eyes landing on a short, baby-faced man walking next to Koyama, a somewhat sleepy smile on his face.
“This is Satoshi.” Koyama smiled proudly, while Sho’s surprised voice asked: “Ohno-san?” and for a moment Shige was convinced his life had been turned into a bad farce.
“Who’s this person?” the new man, Ohno Satoshi as it seemed, asked, aiming his eyes at Shige, sounding like he was asking just because, not really that interested in the answer.
“It’s Shige, my best friend,” Koyama chirped, cutting off Sho, who had also started to answer the man. Shige’s smile was a little unconvincing. He aimed his eyes at Koyama, who didn’t seem at all bothered by the situation.
“I told you about him, remember?” Koyama asked, his tone a little accusing like Shige wasn’t standing in the genkan of his own apartment, surrounded by people who definitely didn’t belong there.
“Oh right, from the art class.” Shige sighed, giving Sho an apologetic smile, surprised when he reached to grab Shige’s hand. A semi-awkward silence followed and even Koyama, usually chatty in any situation, didn’t seem to really know what to say.
“Thanks for tonight, Shige.” Sho was the next to speak, smiling a little uncomfortably. Shige tried to figure out what to say, not wanting the night to end so badly, but not really daring to say much in the company of others.
“Oh, by all means you should stay, Sakurai-san. Especially if you know Satoshi!” Koyama hurried to say, his smiled wide and seemingly innocent.
“I think your cat wants to be fed,” Ohno said before Shige could react, grabbing Koyama’s wrist and dragging him back into the other room, the surprisingly sharp look he gave the two making Shige doubt if he really was as out of it as he had first seemed. In any case, Shige was impressed; it wasn’t that easy to control Koyama when he obviously was dying to make Shige tell him everything.
“Um, so…” Shige started, his smile a little on the pathetic side. “You know Koyama’s boyfriend?” he continued, inwardly cringing at himself.
“Ohno-san? Yeah, he’s my high school senpai,” Sho answered, and then they were back to the awkward silence.
Only then their eyes met and it slowly turned into not-quite-so-awkward, and then even more, Shige suddenly very aware that Sho was still very hot, and he was still kind of turned on. He swallowed thickly, licking his suddenly dry lips, unsure if he really was going to ask what he was planning on.
“There’s a hotel nearby…” he trailed off, and the next moment he knew he was out of his apartment, not caring what Koyama or the fisherman thought as long as Sho kept looking at him like that.
He ignored the knowing look the hotel receptionist gave them, ignored the foreign couple looking slightly scandalized at the sight of Sho’s hand in Shige’s back pocket, ignored the tacky wallpaper in the small room, all his concentration on Sho, on the way they touched, on the way his mind couldn’t quite keep up.
Shige wasn’t sure how he had ended up naked on the bed, Sho spreading himself on top of him, but it didn’t matter either. He was too busy threading his fingers into Sho’s hair, pulling a little in a sudden bout of boldness, the groan Sho gave making his insides twist and burn.
There were still some traces of the awkwardness usual for them even now, in the way Sho fumbled with the lube or how Shige nearly gave Sho a black eye with his knee, but somehow that just made the sex that more intense.
It had never felt like it did now before, Shige losing control willingly, forgetting to be embarrassed when Sho’s fingers entered his body, loosening the muscles until he was almost writhing with pleasure, needing to feel more so badly.
He had never imagined for it to be so enjoyable, someone else’s cock in his body, but it was, the thrill of it making him grip the sheets and gasp for breath. Sho’s pulls on Shige’s cock were rough and uneven, their bodies sliding together, lips crashing together and fingers mapping heated skin.
It was overwhelming, and when he heard Sho groaning out his name like he couldn’t get enough of Shige he lost it, his body convulsing, back arching up from the bed, his moan vibrating in the room. Sho followed soon after, his body going rigid before the last hard thrust, collapsing on top of the younger man.
“I had no idea, Shige,” Sho breathed after a moment of sated silence, and Shige didn’t really have any idea what he was referring to. He tilted his head to give Sho a questioning look, not really trusting his voice just yet.
“I mean I thought you were just lonely or something, and then you left so suddenly in the morning,” Sho continued, and if Shige hadn’t been too horrified to realize Sho did remember the whole incident after all he would’ve been surprised at the hesitant tone of Sho’s voice.
“I’m s-sorry, I don’t know what went into me then,” Shige mumbled, trying to shrink away, but that was a little difficult with Sho sprawled half on top of him.
“Huh?” Sho asked, sounding puzzled, and at that moment it was very hard to believe they both prided themselves as smart. Well, in Shige’s case it had become obvious that his brain somehow worked backwards when Sho was involved but it hadn’t ever even crossed Shige’s mind Sho wasn’t always so in control of himself either.
“I took advantage of the situation and,” Shige said, his voice dying away, his body tensing when he waited for Sho to pull back and leave.
“You mean Yoko didn’t tell you?” Sho asked, sounding surprised, but the look on Shige’s face must’ve told him that Shige had no clue what he was referring to because he continued quickly. “Well you must’ve known I prefer men but I assumed he told you I uh… that I had mentioned you a few times before.”
Whatever it was that Shige had been expecting, it definitely wasn’t that, and it took a while to actually wrap his mind about this new piece of information. He never had been very good with surprising situations, and this, if anything, was one, his mind a mess, thoughts scattered here and there.
But there was one thing, a need that just grew stronger when he met Sho’s eyes, registered the way his arm was still wrapped around Shige, the way his forehead crinkled, like he was worried about Shige’s reaction.
He hadn’t intended to say it, not then and definitely not so unplanned, but after a deep breath, one that made him realize he wouldn’t regret it later, he knew he would.
And then he did.
“I like you.”
***
They parted quickly the next morning, Sho in a hurry to get home to change before work, leaving Shige slightly nervous about where they stood.
Returning home he found Koyama and the Ohno guy sleeping peacefully in his guest bed. He thought it better to give them privacy, taking a long walk to clear his mind, only happy to be introduced to the new person in Koyama’s life when he returned.
He was actually quite happy that the man was there in the end, an effective way to keep Koyama’s curiosity in check. He seemed nice too, and for once Shige didn’t feel the need to wish for a quick breakup, quite the opposite really.
He had no work that day, which meant he didn’t see Sho, a mail telling him Sho had something to ask him arriving when he was already in bed.
The next day in the office went by slowly, Shige trying to act cool, marveling at the lack of office gossip going around despite the two of them leaving together. He figured they just weren’t interesting enough, or more like he wasn’t interesting enough for anyone to suspect anything.
It was a few hours after lunch that he saw Sho making his way towards Shige’s desk. He pretended not to have noticed, busying himself going through a pile of negatives lying on his desk.
“Kato-kun, a moment?” Sho asked, making Shige jump a little. He had used his official voice, a smart idea because more than a few heads had turned when he entered their floor.
Shige nodded, turning to Sho properly, his stomach doing a funny flip at seeing the man again.
“Would you, um, would you like to go out with me? I have a reservation…” Sho asked, his nervousness clear to even Shige. It somehow made Shige feel more confident and relaxed, taking his time instead of stuttering a quick response.
“Yes, but you do realize I’m not a girl?” he asked, almost pulling off the cool attitude, his short laugh a little strained. Sho looked taken aback, blinking at Shige, making him quickly correct himself.
“What I mean is, I’m a decent cook and… Koyama wouldn’t be there this time,” he said with a hesitant smile, handing Sho a random file when someone walked past.
“Yeah, okay,” Sho nodded, running his hand through his hair and smiling at Shige, who couldn’t help but grin back.
“So tomorrow good for you?” Sho asked, flashing a smile at a pair of whispering assistants passing them.
“There’s that conference we’re all supposed to be at,” Shige trailed off, unable to stop himself from sounding disappointed.
“Don’t worry; you don’t need to go,” Sho said casually, and for a moment it looked like he was going to reach out and touch Shige, only to pull back his hand a little awkwardly.
“But they said…” Shige insisted, hating himself a little for being so fastidious with everything.
“It helps to be dating the boss.” Sho winked, his low voice making shivers run down Shige’s spine as he shifted in his seat.
“But I’m not d-dating the boss,” Shige said, trying his best to keep the nervous edge from his voice, only to notice that Sho was already gone.
A couple of minutes later he saw his inbox blinking, his hands shaking slightly when he clicked the mail open.
To: Kato Shigeaki Kato.Shigeaki@ntt.co.jp
From: Sakurai Sho Sakurai.Sho@ntt.co.jp
Subject: Further assignment
...yet.
I’ll see you tomorrow at 7, your place.
From: yuumei_nata
SEASON'S GREETINGS!
Title: Fools Fall in Love
Pairing/Group: Sho/Shige; mentions of Koyama/Ohno
Rating:NC-17
Warnings: Other than gay!sex and fail!Shige, none.
Notes: To moonbyrd: I was so glad when I saw I had gotten you as my recipient, and I couldn’t resist the chance to write ShoShige. I hope it turned out not too weird, and that you will like it, because I had fun writing it ♥
To my beta(s)/supporters: Couldn’t have done this without you ♥
Summary: Had anyone been asked to describe Kato Shigeaki in one word, it would always be smart, and that, in his opinion, was the best thing he’d achieved all his life. Unfortunately for him, the universe didn’t quite agree, sending one Sakurai Sho to mess with his head and turn his world upside down.
Kato Shigeaki was the kind of man who had always made smart choices.
Ever since the age of five when he had first realized what the word meant, to do the thing that would benefit him the most without breaking any rules, official or invisible ones. Of course, it hadn’t always been easy; he had lost count of the times he had been pushed into a puddle with the words ‘teacher’s pet’ ringing in his ears or been called out last during P.E. because he spent more time studying to earn that extra gold star and less running around with the other kids.
It had started to pay off in high school, where being smart secured him a group of similar-minded friends, a position in the student body, and a short fling with a girl who was both cute and impressed by him being chosen to give the graduation speech. He maybe hadn’t been competing for the title of most popular, but in his eyes he’d survived his teenage years well.
University, on the other hand, had been the best time of his life. His first year as a law student had been filled with new people who regarded being smart as one of the most desired qualities. He had also perfected himself, every decision he made a smart one thanks to careful deliberation and sometimes just pure luck. He had a pretty girlfriend, a nice group of friends, and even his decision to switch to photography after his first year had turned out to be a good idea.
After graduating with not the best, but a good degree he had worked freelance for some months, another smart choice on his behalf since that earned him a job at a large newspaper. It wasn’t anything big, just going around Tokyo taking pictures for local news for their website, but it was a good stepping stone considering his future career.
He liked his job a lot; the people he worked with were fun, the whole experience was a whole new chapter in his life and he welcomed it with a smile. He continued making smart decisions even at the workplace, choosing the right people to associate with, taking on extra work when it was needed, all those small things that in the end could result in a promotion.
Only then, on his 23rd birthday, it seemed his luck and capacity to think had run away together to some faraway island in the Pacific Ocean with no return ticket.
It was then that Kato Shigeaki made the first stupid choice in his life.
He fell for Sakurai Sho.
Sakurai Sho, who happened to be one of the most popular journalists at the newspaper, not just because he was immensely talented, but also because he was genuinely nice to everyone and very, very handsome. Technically, he was also Shige’s superior, not to mention undoubtedly male.
He hadn’t quite realized what it was at first, the weird feeling in his chest whenever he saw the man, or even more pathetically, whenever his name was mentioned, but soon enough it became pretty obvious. He had it bad too. It wasn’t the kind of pleasant, thrilling type of love; it was the kind that made him act like a complete idiot, and the worst part was that he couldn’t shake it off or escape it because Sho even had his own corner at the local television news.
Telling his best friend about it didn’t help either. Koyama was too busy fawning over some new guy he’d met at his art class. And in any case, Koyama would only encourage him to act on his feelings, telling Shige he had always played it too safe, that he didn’t even know what love was.
Shige didn’t agree. Quite the opposite, actually; he saw Koyama’s view on it nothing but irresponsible escapism. He’d have one infatuation after another, one day crying over a broken heart and the next declaring someone he'd met two minutes ago his soulmate.
With some help from books called “Know Yourself - Know Your Heart” or “Ten Steps to Getting Over Him” or even “D-I-Y: Loose Screws” (well, that one had turned out to be about actual screws, not the mental ones) and listening to a recording that told him to get over the man for fourteen nights in a row, he gave up.
He was utterly and hopelessly in love, and there was nothing he could do about it.
***
After a few months, things hadn’t changed, for better or for worse. The world was still going around, Koyama was still dating the same guy (Shige was pretty sure he’d made it to top five already), Sho was still as popular and unreachable as ever and Shige? Shige was still in love.
It wasn’t until people started asking him if he was quite alright and pamphlets about burnout or digestive disorders started magically appearing on his desk that he realized he needed to do something about the situation.
He didn’t trust his own judgment anymore. After all he hadn’t been able to do anything right lately, so he turned to the only person he could. Only when Shige for once was actually willing to take Koyama's advice, he caught his best friend on a train to Hokkaido, apparently on his way to a fishing trip with his art teacher of a boyfriend.
It said something about Shige’s distress that instead of lecturing Koyama about the dangers of spontaneity, he just pleaded with him to think of something. Koyama’s advice, unsurprisingly, was that Shige should find a new guy to get over the old one. What was surprising was that Shige actually thought it good advice.
So the next week, he called a friend from his law school times, inviting her out and thinking his luck has finally changed when she immediately told him yes.
Unfortunately, that wasn’t the case.
The date started out well enough, the restaurant nice, the girl pretty and Shige in a good mood. An hour in, the wine loosening them both up, her smile was bright when she leaned over the table with “Enough about me. Tell me what’s it like to be a photographer,” and Shige knew he’d be taking her home that night.
He started with his usual speech about both capturing the beauty in things and seeing them from a different perspective, drawing her attention to him until it felt like they were the only people in the room. Only then, he somehow got on the topic of the company and his coworkers.
Thirty minutes later, her smile had started to be a little strained as Shige frantically tried to stop himself from speaking about Sho. Despite everything, she had miraculously agreed to continue the night in a small izakaya that wasn’t really nearby, just that Shige had heard the atmosphere was nice.
Despite his promise of not talking about work anymore, Shige found it impossible to not somehow connect their every topic to the man constantly on his mind. He could see her flinching when he launched into another story of Sakurai-senpai, but it was like he physically couldn’t stop.
The moment she got up, politely excusing herself to the bathroom, he knew she wouldn’t be coming back. Hell, even he wished he could escape his company. He sighed, resining himself to his fate and moving up to sit at the bar, figuring he might as well get drunk.
The bartender gave him one evaluating look, pouring him a double shot without even asking and placing it in front of him.
“On the house,” he said, his expression neutral.
“But… Thanks,” Shige said, accepting the drink after the black-haired man gave him a stern glare and downing it in one go.
“Girlfriend?” the man asked after a moment of silence, and Shige couldn’t even find it in himself to be bothered.
“Just a date.” He shrugged, and the worst part was that he didn’t really even care. He hadn’t been interested her in the first place, hadn’t even been able to fake his interest, a thing that usually came to him as naturally as his infamously fake smiles. What did bother him was how everything seemed to go badly ever since Sakurai Sho had entered his life.
“This isn’t the place to bring a girl on a first date,” the bartender said, and Shige thought it really wasn’t his business what he did with his life.
“Right, this is a place to drink, so a beer, please,” he said a little gruffily, jumping a little when the guy slammed a pint in front of him, splattering some on the counter.
“I’m the one who calls the shots here, kid. My place, my rules; don’t like it, then leave,” he said, his tone not really angry but still making Shige squirm a little.
“Sorry,” he mumbled, hiding his embarrassment behind the glass as he took a long sip.
“The name’s Yoko by the way,” the bartender said after a moment of silence, flashing him a crooked smile when he looked up.
“Oh, uh, Shige,” he replied, using the same informal style the bartender, Yoko, had used.
“I haven’t seen you here before,” Yoko commented, and Shige bit back a sharp answer; it wasn’t Yoko’s fault he was having a bad day, or more like month.
“I haven’t been here before,” he replied, not really surprised by the question when he stopped to think about it. The izakaya seemed like a place favoured by regulars from the neighbourhood. He wondered briefly if Sho lived close by and if Yoko knew him, but then he quickly pushed those thoughts to the back of his mind.
“Are you from around here?” Yoko continued, and Shige sighed, looking longingly at the secluded table he had occupied before. It was obvious Yoko wouldn’t let him wallow in his misery alone. He figured he’d be grateful in the morning since he was usually of the opinion that self-pity was for losers. Too bad he pretty much felt like one recently.
“No, a, um, someone recommended this place,” Shige said, aiming for casual vagueness.
“They recommended this place for a date? Are you sure they don’t want the girl for themselves?” Yoko grinned, filling Shige’s glass after it had emptied. He actually started feeling relaxed enough to smile a little at Yoko’s comment, even if most of it was thanks to the alcohol soothing his nerves.
“No, we were in the neighbourhood, so…” Shige trailed off. He knew very well it had been a bad idea from the very start.
“Neighbourhood, huh?” Yoko said, giving him a look that made him squirm again. Yoko couldn’t possibly know what he was thinking, Shige concluded.
“Yeah. I wasn’t that into her anyway,” Shige said, realizing it sounded like a bad excuse and cringing a little.
“That’s what they all say,” Yoko said, without a hint of humour on his face. Shige was having trouble deciding if he liked the man or not, but at least he was better company than the bottom of his glass.
Despite serving the few other customers occasionally, Yoko mostly spent the next hour chatting with Shige, telling him random stories of the customers of the izakaya. Shige also learned he was originally from Osaka, a fact that made him almost tear up, since he too had spent his childhood in that area. It was at that point that Yoko replaced his beer with coffee, ignoring Shige’s whining.
It was still surprisingly early, the place actually filling up with people instead of emptying. And seeing as how Shige’s luck had turned against him, it was only natural that one of those people should be none other than the man he both hoped and dreaded to meet.
Shige didn’t notice Sho entering the bar until he was standing next to him, ordering ‘the usual’ from Yoko, who had greeted him in a way that seemed almost friendly.
“Kato-kun, is that you?” Sho asked after Shige’s failed attempt at hiding his face by studying one of the snack menus closely.
“Oh, Sakurai-san, didn’t see you there!” Shige greeted him, aiming for a casual tone that hopefully didn’t give away how drunk he was. Judging by the look Yoko gave him, he had not achieved that, as was expected.
“I didn’t know you lived around here,” Sho continued with a polite smile. When Sho took the stool next to him, Shige suppressed the urge to slam his head against the counter.
“Uhm, I don’t really. I just happened to be in the neighbourhood,” Shige mumbled, hoping Sho was here with friends, or at least would leave Shige alone after the mandatory small talk.
Sho nodded, still smiling like he did on the news, making Shige’s cheeks feel a little hot.
“Oi, Aiba, you were supposed to be here an hour ago!” Yoko’s loud voice cut through Shige’s wishes of the ground swallowing him or aliens kidnapping him or anything really to get out of the situation.
He turned his head just in time to see a tall, lanky man step behind the bar, wrapping his arms around Yoko’s waist and squeezing him with a huge smile that reminded him of Koyama.
“Missed me, Yokocho?” the tall man, apparently going by the name of Aiba, teased, moving to the other side of the bar before Yoko could even react. Shige was slightly amused, the two seeming like an unlikely duo to ever become friends, much less start a business together.
“Don’t let their appearances fool you. Under it, they’re just two huge perverts,” Sho noted, apparently noticing the slightly curious look on Shige’s face.
“Oh,” Shige blinked, feeling a little weird thinking of Sho, who despite being nice seemed always so proper, having perverted friends.
“Don’t let Yoko fool you. He’s not half as cool as he pretends to be,” Sho continued, laughing a little at Shige’s disbelieving expression.
“How’s the gossip, ladies?” Yoko’s dry voice interrupted. Shige was slightly embarrassed, but Sho was barely affected, calmly asking for another beer.
“Are you the poor guy who got dumped?” a new voice joined the conversation, Aiba’s sympathetic eyes trained on Shige.
“Kato-kun, you got dumped? I’m sorry to hear that,” Sho said, using the same voice Shige recognized from the more serious pieces of news he covered, earthquakes and recession and such. Shige groaned, burying his head in his arms; the night just kept getting worse.
“He’s probably just pissed he didn’t get laid today,” Yoko joined in again, making Shige’s head rise, aiming a glare at the older man who just stared back until Shige turned his eyes away. Yoko was seriously unnerving.
“I know how tough it can be, Kato-kun, but you know what they say, there’s plenty of fish in the sea!” Sho said in an obvious attempt at being a good senpai, adding an awkward pat on Shige’s back that made Aiba chuckle, a glint in his eyes when he looked at Sho that Shige couldn’t quite place, before he hurried to serve yet another customer.
“It’s not like any woman would ever turn you down,” he said, a bitter tint to his voice. He knew it was a mistake the moment the words left his mouth, a quick apology on the tip of his tongue.
But instead of a scolding glare, he was faced with a spluttering Sho, coughing like he had almost choked on his beer. Yoko, on the other hand was grinning like Shige had told the best joke of the evening, reaching over the counter to slap Sho on the back.
“Yeah, Sho, it’s not like any woman would turn you down,” he said, practically leering at the man. Shige didn’t really get the joke, staring at the two of them like they had suddenly lost their minds, surprised that even Sakurai Sho, of all people, could look so…uncool.
With Sho shooting an embarrassed glare at Yoko, who just smiled even wider, Shige started feeling growingly uncomfortable, excusing himself to the bathroom. Yoko reminded him mockingly that he could see if Shige tried to sneak out, making Shige stumble with his words when he assured him he wouldn’t.
He took his time, trying to calm himself down, trying to find the old, smart Shige from where he was buried inside him. Only when he came back, the mood had changed again, Sho looking absolutely murderous when Yoko welcomed him back and told him he had business to attend to so he’d leave the two of them alone.
It was the sparkle in Yoko’s eyes that made Shige uneasy, and the growing feeling that Sho and Yoko had been talking about him. Shige and Sho continued alone, Shige trying to avoid looking at Sho while looking like he wasn’t doing exactly that. They had difficulty forming a decent conversation, something that just convinced Shige more of the fact that they definitely weren’t meant to be.
He was relieved when Sho left on the pretense of having to work early the following morning, waiting a good ten minutes before going himself to avoid the awkwardness of having to walk together.
When he was finally at home, flopping on the couch and burying his face in the pillows as if to hide his embarrassment from the world, he decided it was time to start avoiding Sho as well as he could.
***
After somewhat successfully managing to avoid his senpai for nearly two weeks, as Shige was starting to believe his situation actually was fixable (even if the man still frequented his dreams), the worst thing possible happened.
His department head had come down to tell him he’d be assisting a reporter on a new special article series. Shige had been thrilled at first because normally he took every opportunity he could to prove his skills, hoping to do much more than just take pictures of little old ladies shopping for food or hooligans hanging out at stations.
However, normally, he didn’t have feelings for the reporter who would be joining him. If working with Sho wasn't bad enough, the job also included taking a road trip through Japan. The title of the series of articles would simply be “Life in Japan”, which meant going to cities and villages all over to cover all kinds of people and stories.
Unfortunately, he was in no position to say no to such an opportunity, especially when rumour had it Sho had especially requested Shige. He had no clue why that was, but somewhere under the frustration and anxiety, he felt his heart make a tiny little flip of happiness.
So come next week he was in a car with Sho, trying to come up with topics to discuss. It was early morning, the roads still silent, but his mind was wide awake, on alert, trying his best to appear perfectly normal, like his palms hadn’t been clammy from the moment he had stepped into Sho’s car.
It took them the first day to really get comfortable in each other’s company, but as soon as they started actually working, Shige taking pictures as Sho interviewed the people, their interaction became a lot smoother.
What surprised him most was the fact that Sho seemed to enjoy his company, seeking him out in the hotels or ryokans they spent their nights in, sometimes staying up quite late, just talking.
The week flew by, Shige determined not to think about how after this it would be impossible to pretend he was fine just being coworkers with Sho. He would have plenty of time for that later, now he just wanted to enjoy the rare chance of getting the man all to himself, to converse with him without having to feel so self-conscious about it.
It was their last night when things took a bad turn. Thus far, they had had their own rooms, but thanks to a mix up at the hotel there was just one room reserved for them, the place otherwise fully booked. It was late, the small city strange to them both, so at Sho’s suggestion they decided to share.
Only,Shige hadn’t taken into account that it would be a double bed, the kind you couldn’t divide into two separate ones. He froze when he saw it, his grip on the handle of his suitcase too tight, trying his hardest not to panic.
Sho tried to laugh about it, but it was evident he was feeling a little awkward too when he announced it was big enough to fit four people comfortably so they shouldn’t have any problem. Shige nodded, not wanting to make Sho suspicious even when his mind was screaming at him that it was the worst idea of his life, topping even that time he had been dared into calling a sexline in the middle of a lecture (he still had difficulties looking at a pointer).
Sho claimed the shower first. Shige was glad to get a moment to collect himself, to school his mind into not wandering where it definitely shouldn’t. He paced around the room, avoiding looking at the bed or thinking about Sho in the shower because that did bad things to his body.
When he heard the shower turned off, he panicked a little, needing to seem relaxed and definitely not like he had just been fretting about the night for the entire time Sho had been in the next room. He eventually decided on sitting on the edge of the bed, reaching for the remote to quickly turn the TV on.
He had always been bad with hotel televisions, fumbling with the remote, trying to find any of the regular channels. In the end, he just stabbed at random buttons, his eyes widening in shock when he accidentally managed to choose one of the pay channels, the wide screen attached to the wall suddenly filled with naked bodies, obscene moans and grunts filling the silence.
As his luck had it, Sho chose that exact moment to enter the room. Shige’s body refused to take the panicked orders from his brain, the porn continuing to play on the screen.
“Oh,” said Sho, his eyes darting between Shige and the screen, the younger man finally snapping out of his stupor and turning off the television set. He swallowed thickly, trying to decide if it was more embarrassing looking at Sho or pointedly not looking at him.
“Don’t mind me,” Sho said, smiling at Shige, without the slightest hint of sarcasm in his voice, making Shige’s face heat up quickly. That was also when his brain registered the fact that the man he was ridiculously attracted to was standing in nothing but a towel wrapped around his waist.
Shige couldn’t stop his eyes from following the droplets of water sliding down his naked chest, past a dark nipple onto his abs and then even lower. His mouth was suddenly very dry, blood rushing in his ears, which was a little funny considering how it seemed to be pooling a lot lower, his pants getting too tight for comfort.
“Oh, I wasn’t-I didn’t, I accidentally…” he said, stumbling with his words, at the same time trying to will the erection away. His mortification doubled when he saw Sho’s eyes drifting lower, raising his eyebrows a little.
“Sure,” he said, his tone suggesting he didn’t believe Shige in the slightest and was just being polite. Shige got up quickly, muttering something about needing to shower, that Sho didn’t need to wait up, before escaping into the bathroom.
His only comfort was that at least Sho had thought it had been the straight porn that had caused Shige’s state, not his lust for the man himself.
He stripped slowly, stepping under the cold spray of water and standing there long enough for his erection to wilt away. There was no way he could touch himself while Sho was so close, when he was about to sleep in the same bed as him.
He was relieved to find Sho already tucked in and apparently asleep when he finally exited the bathroom, quickly making his way to the bed and slipping under the covers. He made sure to position himself to the very edge of the bed, resisting the temptation to build a wall out of pillows, a technique he and Koyama had used on a trip of theirs that hadn’t in the end worked all that well.
Apparently he fell asleep pretty easily despite everything, because the next thing he knew, he was roused from sleep by something. The first thing his sleepy brain realized was that he was hard; the second that there was a warm body pressed against his back.
He turned around, snuggling closer to the warmth, ready to continue his sleep when his brain finally caught up. He stiffened, the realization that he was now pressed against Sho slowly sinking in.
But somehow, instead of moving quickly away he just shifted a little, his breath catching in his throat when he realized there was now something hard pressing against his thigh.
He opened his eyes slowly, blinking, trying to focus his eyes in the dark room, maybe to see if Sho was awake too, but he couldn’t tell. He licked his lips, his breathing suddenly very shallow but again, instead of pulling back like he should’ve, he moved his leg closer to Sho.
He could hear the change in Sho’s breathing, though he still wasn’t sure if he was awake or not. The way Sho’s hips seemed to move a little, the hardness rubbing against Shige’s thigh like a silent plea, made him even more forward.
His hand seemed to find its way between their bodies almost of its own accord, using his palm to rub at the unmistakable bulge in Sho’s pajama pants, feeling the radiating heat through the thin fabric. His own cock twitched when he heard Sho’s breath hitching, and this time he couldn’t mistake the way Sho’s hips snapped forward into the touch.
The next thing he felt Sho’s arm circling his waist, pulling him closer, and it was like the rational part of his brain was still asleep. Shige’s lips landed too close to Sho’s neck to not reach out and taste. He kept moving his hand slowly, but it was harder to not touch himself instead, the smell and feel of Sho intoxicating.
When he felt Sho’s hand moving lower, cupping his ass gently, his last restraint melted away. He used both his hands to tug both their pants lower, freeing their erections.
There was no room for right or wrong when he finally wrapped his hand around Sho’s erection, feeling the weight of it for a moment before slowly moving his hand up and down. The moan Sho let out made his blood boil, his own following suit when he felt a hand wrapping around his cock.
It was better than anything he had imagined, gasping for breath, his face still pressed into Sho’s neck, not caring that the position was awkward for both of them. The small noises Sho made send shivers down his spine, his body hyperaware of every touch both on his skin and on his ass, Sho’s fingers kneading the flesh while pumping him steadily.
The heat between them built up dizzyingly fast. Sho was the one to lose it first, his seed spilling onto Shige’s fingers with a low groan. The way his hands stilled, squeezing Shige’s shaft almost painfully hard was what drove him over the edge, his body tensing before he too released, feeling dizzy with the intensity of it.
Sho didn’t pull away, but neither of them said anything either, Shige listening to the other man’s breathing slowing down gradually, lulling them both to sleep.
It couldn’t have been more than a few hours before Shige woke up again, the reality of what he had done crashing down on him before he even could open his eyes.
He didn’t really have time to think about what he was doing before he had rolled away from Sho, luckily still sound asleep, scribbling a note that he had left for a jog before escaping the room.
He spent the morning just walking around, the cold feeling of dread tight around his chest, unable to grasp how badly he had messed up. If doing that without asking wasn’t bad enough, he had actually taken advantage of Sho when he had been half asleep.
He couldn’t remember a time he had felt so utterly lost and disgusted with himself, the feeling not going away even when Sho seemed to have no recollection of the night when he finally got back. He wasn’t sure if Sho was just being nice about it or if he really had been asleep, but nevertheless, they were back to square one, Shige acting even more stiff than he had in the beginning.
It was a huge relief when the day ended, and they parted with slightly forced smiles, Shige firmly deciding he’d avoid Sho to the best of his abilities, restricting himself to professional behavior only.
He tried contacting Koyama again, hoping he would be able to accidentally say something that would make Shige want to never speak to Sho again, that had been the case when Shige had almost started crushing on his high school teacher.
It didn’t help, Koyama just laughing at him, telling him it would all work out if Shige would just let it be in an infuriatingly calm, un-Koyama-like, voice. Shige started suspecting that fisherman Koyama was still living with, on some small island, was actually some cult leader.
***
It was the night of the office Christmas party, a bunch of them crowding into the same small izakaya Shige’s date failure had taken place in. Shige still wasn’t quite sure how he’d ended up in the same company as Sho, but in the end he didn’t really mind either.
He hadn’t really seen or talked to Sho after their trip, their contact limited to an email where Sho complimented Shige on a job well done, and he was pretty confident he could pull off the professional act, after all.
Things seemed to be going smoothly, Shige pleasantly buzzed but making sure he was still sober enough to keep in control of himself.
Shige was sure Sho didn’t remember or suspect anything after a few coworkers asked them about their trip, Sho’s answers natural, meeting Shige’s eyes briefly and so he could actually relax and enjoy the small afterparty, laughing at the jokes and even telling a few of his own. It was like he had finally gotten his old self back, only slightly less in control and a little more relaxed.
An hour and several jugs of beer carried to the tables their crowd occupied later, things took a strange turn. Sho had somehow ended up sitting across the table from Shige, their gazes meeting over the table more often than not.
The first one or five times, Shige quickly looked away, desperately trying to avoid turning his head Sho’s way. Of course, that proved a little difficult because for the past 6 months, Shige’s gaze had naturally gravitated towards that person, something he still hadn’t learned to control.
But then, as people left and more private conversations started forming, Shige found himself just sitting there quietly, not really interested in either of the conversations going on around him. When he looked around, he was surprised to notice Sho wasn’t really participating either.
The smile they exchanged was slightly awkward, Shige quickly pretending to be following the conversation his coworker and their boss were having about the latest baseball game, a sport Shige had little interest in.
After a moment or two, he found himself sneaking looks at Sho again, starting an awkward conversation when the man caught him looking one too many times. After a few failed attempts at finding a good topic, they ended up talking about their trip.
Shige was starting to feel a little weird, thinking he was missing something when the conversation continued, Sho holding a pause that felt like it should’ve been meaningful, his eyes lingering on Shige longer than he thought comfortable.
It was like Sho was flirting with him, a thought that scattered Shige’s brain enough to almost choke on his beer when he felt Sho’s knee brushing against his under the table.
Sho seemed a little awkward when he apologized, excusing himself for a smoke a few moments after, looking at Shige like he was trying to convey a message.
Old Shige would never have left after Sho, but he wasn’t old Shige anymore, where he had lost his smartness he had apparently gotten something else in return. He rose from the table and followed the other man, his throat drying with nervousness. He had no idea what he was doing, no idea what was going to happen when they got outside, but somehow that was fine.
Sometime in the past months he had learned how to live his life without planning every moment.
They exited through a side door Shige hadn’t known was there, finding themselves at a small and empty back alley. Shige couldn’t help but noticing the way the dim lighting of the alley was flattering on Sho’s figure, making him seem less like a newscaster with a perfect smile, and more like the man whose body Shige had felt close to him just a few short weeks ago.
“To tell you the truth, I don’t really smoke,” Sho admitted a little sheepishly, ruffling his hair a little when he met Shige’s eyes.
“Me neither,” Shige admitted, the rational part of his brain telling him to smile back because the tone of his voice was too low, like he was suggesting something Sho surely hadn’t meant. But he couldn’t shake the feeling it wasn’t just that he was lovesick enough to be delusional, the way Sho was looking at him, like he was waiting for Shige to call the shots.
So for the first time in his life, he actually knowingly acted against his better judgment, stepping a little closer and nervously bringing his lips to Sho’s. He was surprised to realize he was actually some centimeters taller than the older man, figuring his confident aura had made him seem taller than he was in Shige’s head.
He winced with embarrassment when their noses bumped together, Shige’s lips landing awkwardly on the corner of Sho’s mouth. He was ready to step away, a stuttered apology already forming on his lips when he felt Sho responding, moving his head so that their lips fit perfectly together.
The kiss was short and hesitant, like neither of them really trusted that the other wouldn’t pull back at any moment. Shige blinked when the kiss broke, his tongue flicking out in a nervous habit, their faces still close together, meeting Sho’s eyes and feeling his breath on his moist lips.
This time it was Sho who initiated the kiss, his hand suddenly behind Shige’s neck, pressing their mouths back together. It was much more daring, all doubt leaving his head when he felt Sho’s tongue sweeping over his lower lip in a silent plea for more.
He closed his eyes, letting his hands find Sho’s hips when the kiss grew more daring, more passionate, abandoning reason to get more of the burning feeling. He was gasping into Sho’s mouth before he knew it. Sho’s body was pinning him to the cold and dirty wall behind him, but he couldn’t even pretend to care.
He would’ve expected to be in full panic mode, but that was the furthest thing from his mind as he lost himself in the kiss, the two of them breaking apart only to crash their mouths together again and again, losing track of time and place.
Sho’s hands were in his hair and his in the man’s back pockets, their hips grinding together in small motions, muffled groans forming in the back of his throat, and he couldn’t believe this was happening, too perfect to be true.
Later he wondered if they would’ve just ended up doing each other there in that small alley, a thought that disgusted him much less than it should’ve, if a low whistle hadn’t interrupted them, Yoko’s voice calling for Aiba to come see what he had found.
They had broken apart quickly, a similar look of a deer in the headlights reflected on both their faces as their eyes met with Aiba’s glittering smile and Yoko’s dark grin. It would’ve been obvious to anyone what had just happened, Shige’s hair tousled and Sho’s lips bruised, even if they hadn’t been caught red handed.
Shige was glad his blood was humming in his ears too loudly to hear what Aiba had said, the redness rising in Sho’s cheeks hint enough.
“Sorry for the interruption. We’ll leave you boys to it,” Yoko smirked, pushing Aiba back inside before he could traumatize their favourite customer anymore, only to pop his head back out again, this time aiming his words just at Sho.
“Don’t screw up this one, Sho-chan.”
When Shige got over his initial shock, finally finding the courage to look over at Sho only to find the man staring at his own shoes, his hands in tight fists, he couldn’t help the cold disappointment spreading in his chest. He should’ve known it was too good to be true, and it was obvious Sho was already regretting it. His only consolation was that at least this time Sho hadn’t been asleep.
He was ready to disappear, plans of quitting the company as soon as Monday forming in his mind when he opened his mouth, only to be interrupted by Sho.
“You have no idea how long I’ve wanted that,” Sho said, the look in his eyes when he raised his head to meet Shige’s stare both guarded and hopeful. Shige just blinked, his brain refusing to process the new information, because Sho couldn’t possibly mean what he thought he did.
“What?” he croaked, falling back against the wall because he wasn’t quite sure his legs would hold him up anymore.
Sho just shook his head, stepping closer and kissing Shige again, and he could feel the hint of desperation behind his determination. For once of his life, Shige’s body seemed to know what to do, responding to the kiss almost naturally, his fists curling into the crisp material of Sho’s shirt to pull him close again.
“Shige,” Sho breathed against his lips, and that simple word seemed to ignite something in him again, his hand sliding to Sho’s pant pocket to fish out his phone, dialing the number for the taxi he didn’t even know he remembered.
He only pulled back long enough to tell the address to the woman on the other end of the line, not even caring when his breath hitched quite obviously when Sho’s tongue found a sweet spot under his ear.
“Come home with me,” he asked, his hands in Sho’s hair when the man nibbled on his neck, his knee pressed between Shige’s thighs, and he even forgot to be relieved when Sho answered yes.
He had never done this kind of thing before, his only attempt at a reckless one night stand ending when both his and her dorm rooms had been occupied by their respective roommates.
Oddly enough, however, he didn’t hesitate even the smallest bit, not when they entered the taxi, Shige mumbling his address to the driver while Sho did his best at distracting him, and not when Sho pressed him against the elevator doors, both almost falling out when it stopped at Shige’s floor.
There was a nervous excitement bubbling in his chest when he fiddled with the key, Sho thankfully standing back or he would’ve probably never managed to unlock the door.
They stumbled into Shige’s apartment, not really caring where their shoes landed when they kicked them off, Shige finding himself pressed against a wall before they even made it out of the genkan. His mind was running a million miles a minute, the way Sho’s hips moved against him making his pants feel uncomfortably tight, loud moans threatening to rip from his throat any moment.
However, it seemed like luck wasn’t on his side that night either, Shige almost falling on his ass with surprise when he heard a cheery voice calling out his name.
“Shige, I hope you don’t mind I-oh, you’ve got company,” that voice was saying, and Shige cursed all the gods he could think of for making him think giving Koyama a key was a good idea. Sure, he wasn’t in the habit of bringing home random people he had hooked up with-actually, he rarely even brought home people from a date-but he should’ve known something like this was bound to happen.
“You weren’t supposed to be back yet,” Shige muttered to no one in particular, wondering what he had done in his previous life to deserve this now.
He lifted his head to meet Koyama’s curious eyes. Sho had taken a few steps back, looking at Koyama and then back at Shige. He could almost see the wheels turning in his head, and he rushed to explain.
“Uh, Sh-Sakurai-san, this is my friend, Koyama Keiichiro,” Shige said, hoping that the semi-formal introduction would make the situation a little less awkward. Sho looked at him silently, slight apprehension in his eyes that was gone before he could even be sure.
“It’s not what you thi-,” Shige started, but Sho interrupted him before he could finish.
“I should probably go, let you catch up with your friend,” Sho said, straightening his tie with a small frown, nodding politely at Koyama but not meeting Shige’s eyes. It was too much for Shige’s brain to keep up with, opening his mouth and hoping the right words would just fall out, but with no luck.
“Sho-kun, is that you?” a second voice, one Shige didn’t recognize, asked. All three of them turned their heads to the direction of the doorway leading to Shige’s living room, their eyes landing on a short, baby-faced man walking next to Koyama, a somewhat sleepy smile on his face.
“This is Satoshi.” Koyama smiled proudly, while Sho’s surprised voice asked: “Ohno-san?” and for a moment Shige was convinced his life had been turned into a bad farce.
“Who’s this person?” the new man, Ohno Satoshi as it seemed, asked, aiming his eyes at Shige, sounding like he was asking just because, not really that interested in the answer.
“It’s Shige, my best friend,” Koyama chirped, cutting off Sho, who had also started to answer the man. Shige’s smile was a little unconvincing. He aimed his eyes at Koyama, who didn’t seem at all bothered by the situation.
“I told you about him, remember?” Koyama asked, his tone a little accusing like Shige wasn’t standing in the genkan of his own apartment, surrounded by people who definitely didn’t belong there.
“Oh right, from the art class.” Shige sighed, giving Sho an apologetic smile, surprised when he reached to grab Shige’s hand. A semi-awkward silence followed and even Koyama, usually chatty in any situation, didn’t seem to really know what to say.
“Thanks for tonight, Shige.” Sho was the next to speak, smiling a little uncomfortably. Shige tried to figure out what to say, not wanting the night to end so badly, but not really daring to say much in the company of others.
“Oh, by all means you should stay, Sakurai-san. Especially if you know Satoshi!” Koyama hurried to say, his smiled wide and seemingly innocent.
“I think your cat wants to be fed,” Ohno said before Shige could react, grabbing Koyama’s wrist and dragging him back into the other room, the surprisingly sharp look he gave the two making Shige doubt if he really was as out of it as he had first seemed. In any case, Shige was impressed; it wasn’t that easy to control Koyama when he obviously was dying to make Shige tell him everything.
“Um, so…” Shige started, his smile a little on the pathetic side. “You know Koyama’s boyfriend?” he continued, inwardly cringing at himself.
“Ohno-san? Yeah, he’s my high school senpai,” Sho answered, and then they were back to the awkward silence.
Only then their eyes met and it slowly turned into not-quite-so-awkward, and then even more, Shige suddenly very aware that Sho was still very hot, and he was still kind of turned on. He swallowed thickly, licking his suddenly dry lips, unsure if he really was going to ask what he was planning on.
“There’s a hotel nearby…” he trailed off, and the next moment he knew he was out of his apartment, not caring what Koyama or the fisherman thought as long as Sho kept looking at him like that.
He ignored the knowing look the hotel receptionist gave them, ignored the foreign couple looking slightly scandalized at the sight of Sho’s hand in Shige’s back pocket, ignored the tacky wallpaper in the small room, all his concentration on Sho, on the way they touched, on the way his mind couldn’t quite keep up.
Shige wasn’t sure how he had ended up naked on the bed, Sho spreading himself on top of him, but it didn’t matter either. He was too busy threading his fingers into Sho’s hair, pulling a little in a sudden bout of boldness, the groan Sho gave making his insides twist and burn.
There were still some traces of the awkwardness usual for them even now, in the way Sho fumbled with the lube or how Shige nearly gave Sho a black eye with his knee, but somehow that just made the sex that more intense.
It had never felt like it did now before, Shige losing control willingly, forgetting to be embarrassed when Sho’s fingers entered his body, loosening the muscles until he was almost writhing with pleasure, needing to feel more so badly.
He had never imagined for it to be so enjoyable, someone else’s cock in his body, but it was, the thrill of it making him grip the sheets and gasp for breath. Sho’s pulls on Shige’s cock were rough and uneven, their bodies sliding together, lips crashing together and fingers mapping heated skin.
It was overwhelming, and when he heard Sho groaning out his name like he couldn’t get enough of Shige he lost it, his body convulsing, back arching up from the bed, his moan vibrating in the room. Sho followed soon after, his body going rigid before the last hard thrust, collapsing on top of the younger man.
“I had no idea, Shige,” Sho breathed after a moment of sated silence, and Shige didn’t really have any idea what he was referring to. He tilted his head to give Sho a questioning look, not really trusting his voice just yet.
“I mean I thought you were just lonely or something, and then you left so suddenly in the morning,” Sho continued, and if Shige hadn’t been too horrified to realize Sho did remember the whole incident after all he would’ve been surprised at the hesitant tone of Sho’s voice.
“I’m s-sorry, I don’t know what went into me then,” Shige mumbled, trying to shrink away, but that was a little difficult with Sho sprawled half on top of him.
“Huh?” Sho asked, sounding puzzled, and at that moment it was very hard to believe they both prided themselves as smart. Well, in Shige’s case it had become obvious that his brain somehow worked backwards when Sho was involved but it hadn’t ever even crossed Shige’s mind Sho wasn’t always so in control of himself either.
“I took advantage of the situation and,” Shige said, his voice dying away, his body tensing when he waited for Sho to pull back and leave.
“You mean Yoko didn’t tell you?” Sho asked, sounding surprised, but the look on Shige’s face must’ve told him that Shige had no clue what he was referring to because he continued quickly. “Well you must’ve known I prefer men but I assumed he told you I uh… that I had mentioned you a few times before.”
Whatever it was that Shige had been expecting, it definitely wasn’t that, and it took a while to actually wrap his mind about this new piece of information. He never had been very good with surprising situations, and this, if anything, was one, his mind a mess, thoughts scattered here and there.
But there was one thing, a need that just grew stronger when he met Sho’s eyes, registered the way his arm was still wrapped around Shige, the way his forehead crinkled, like he was worried about Shige’s reaction.
He hadn’t intended to say it, not then and definitely not so unplanned, but after a deep breath, one that made him realize he wouldn’t regret it later, he knew he would.
And then he did.
“I like you.”
***
They parted quickly the next morning, Sho in a hurry to get home to change before work, leaving Shige slightly nervous about where they stood.
Returning home he found Koyama and the Ohno guy sleeping peacefully in his guest bed. He thought it better to give them privacy, taking a long walk to clear his mind, only happy to be introduced to the new person in Koyama’s life when he returned.
He was actually quite happy that the man was there in the end, an effective way to keep Koyama’s curiosity in check. He seemed nice too, and for once Shige didn’t feel the need to wish for a quick breakup, quite the opposite really.
He had no work that day, which meant he didn’t see Sho, a mail telling him Sho had something to ask him arriving when he was already in bed.
The next day in the office went by slowly, Shige trying to act cool, marveling at the lack of office gossip going around despite the two of them leaving together. He figured they just weren’t interesting enough, or more like he wasn’t interesting enough for anyone to suspect anything.
It was a few hours after lunch that he saw Sho making his way towards Shige’s desk. He pretended not to have noticed, busying himself going through a pile of negatives lying on his desk.
“Kato-kun, a moment?” Sho asked, making Shige jump a little. He had used his official voice, a smart idea because more than a few heads had turned when he entered their floor.
Shige nodded, turning to Sho properly, his stomach doing a funny flip at seeing the man again.
“Would you, um, would you like to go out with me? I have a reservation…” Sho asked, his nervousness clear to even Shige. It somehow made Shige feel more confident and relaxed, taking his time instead of stuttering a quick response.
“Yes, but you do realize I’m not a girl?” he asked, almost pulling off the cool attitude, his short laugh a little strained. Sho looked taken aback, blinking at Shige, making him quickly correct himself.
“What I mean is, I’m a decent cook and… Koyama wouldn’t be there this time,” he said with a hesitant smile, handing Sho a random file when someone walked past.
“Yeah, okay,” Sho nodded, running his hand through his hair and smiling at Shige, who couldn’t help but grin back.
“So tomorrow good for you?” Sho asked, flashing a smile at a pair of whispering assistants passing them.
“There’s that conference we’re all supposed to be at,” Shige trailed off, unable to stop himself from sounding disappointed.
“Don’t worry; you don’t need to go,” Sho said casually, and for a moment it looked like he was going to reach out and touch Shige, only to pull back his hand a little awkwardly.
“But they said…” Shige insisted, hating himself a little for being so fastidious with everything.
“It helps to be dating the boss.” Sho winked, his low voice making shivers run down Shige’s spine as he shifted in his seat.
“But I’m not d-dating the boss,” Shige said, trying his best to keep the nervous edge from his voice, only to notice that Sho was already gone.
A couple of minutes later he saw his inbox blinking, his hands shaking slightly when he clicked the mail open.
To: Kato Shigeaki Kato.Shigeaki@ntt.co.jp
From: Sakurai Sho Sakurai.Sho@ntt.co.jp
Subject: Further assignment
...yet.
I’ll see you tomorrow at 7, your place.